Seeking Advice About Getting Rid of the Pacifier

Two things, first my dentist suggested not taking him ( my son) off the pacifier until he was three, as he said at that point he would not think to put his thumb in his mouth. The other thing that worked for my other son, was poking a small hole in it, as it is less desirable. Good luck. M.

This just worked on my friend's two year old- try explaining to her that she is a big girl and pacifiers are only for babies. Then have her give her binky to a baby that needs it. My friend's daughter gave it to my 8 month old son, who she adores, and it made her so happy to help him out and she also seemed very proud to be such a big girl.

I am in the same situation w/ my 3yo. he loves it. only gets it at bedtime, and is not allowed to talk w/ it i his mouth. i looked up articles online. Dr. Sears says that it's an emotional attachment and the action of sucking is a soothing one, even up to the age of 5. So, as long as it's not interfering w/ speech and it's restricted in use, it's better to just let them have it til they're ready to give it up. It's kind of like taking away their favorite toy or blankie, and would cause them stress that's just not necessary. So we set the rules, he knows them, and we'll just go w/ the flow for now. The only dental concern w/b if child got adult teeth in early, and that doesn't start til age 6 at earliest I think.

I didn't read through all the responses. So sorry if I'm repeating anyones suggestion. My daughter was really addicted to the passifier during naps and at night time. I was so worried that she would never want to give it up, or we would have many nights of crying. I got this suggestion from my sister who did it on all 3 of her kids. And all 3 were success stories.

This is what I did: I just started with a small cut on the top of the passifier. Not just a small hole, I actually cut the top tip of the passifier completely off. It's totally safe. There is NO way that your child can pull the passifier off once it's cut. My husband and I tried ourselves. We tried biting it as hard as we could and the thing didn't budge. Just wanted to give you some reassurance before trying something like this. For the first 2 days we did the 1st cut. I was pleasantly surprised at my daughters reaction. She knew something was different about her passifier...but continued to suck on it anyway. Two days later we cut just a little more off. She could still suck on it. Two more days later another cut...this time it was hard for her to keep it in her mouth if she rolled on her side. That night before bed she told me that she didn't want her passifier anymore. I was in shock when she said this. This was coming from a girl who loved her passifier and had it since 3 months of age. She never cried once during this whole process. And the day she gave up her passifier was the last day she ever asked for it. It worked out perfectly.

We did try the tough love first by taking her passifier away without any warning. We had 3 nights of awful crying for at least 2 hour sessions. She was falling asleep standing up. So in other words she was falling asleep after pure exhaustion of crying so much. I couldn't handle that. So the first suggestion I gave you worked out better for all of us. And it only took 6 days.

Good luck!
ak

For my son I told him the baba's mama had to take baba home. So we put all his baba's in a box wrapped it in fancy paper put stickers on it and colored it with markers. When he went to bed he kissed the box good bye and while that was not the last I heard of it he was able to understand that baba was home with his mama now. Baba's mama also left him a spiderman potatoe head the next morning to say thank you for letting her baby come home. It worked for us. Oh and I put baba in our laundry room so my son did not have to see the box while he was trying to fall asleep. Once you start don't go back.

Hi, I had the same trouble with my daughter. She only used the pacifier to go to sleep, so I wasn't very concerned. I kept putting off the "quit date." But when she was 2 1/2 her brother was born and I noticed she started sucking on it throughout the day. At the time I was overwhelmed and let her do it. I worried how I was going to get her to stop, and I really didn't want to be the bad guy. So when we went to the dentist for her 3 year check-up I pulled the dentist aside and asked him to tell her how bad it was for her teeth. He was more than happy to give her a "speech" about what it would do to her mouth(it scared me too!) That night when she asked for the pacifier all I had to do was remind her about what the doctor said and she was fine with it. I think hearing it from the dentist made a difference. She only asked one or two more times from then on, and never really threw a fit. Maybe I just got lucky, but it could work for you. Good luck.

We did it the guilt free way. I couldn't go cold turkey so at the advice of my daughters dentist, we poked a hole in her pacifier so that she barely noticed. A couple weeks later we poked a bigger hole in it and a couple weeks later we snipped just the very tip off. And so on until about 2-3 months later it was short enough that she had a hard time keeping it in her mouth. With each change, she would look a little confused and it would take her longer to fall asleep but in the end I was happy that it was her choice to not use a pacifier anymore. We let her keep them in her bed for a long time until she completely rejected them. Her baby brother was born about 6 months later and was using a paci and she had no interest in them anymore. I read here that someone said it was a choking hazard to cut the tip but this was at the advice of my dentist and when I told my pediatrician what we were doing, she was fine with it.

The "Binki Fairy" came to visit my little girl to bring her a "big girl present" when she got rid of pacifier.
We took our binki to the zoo and gave it to the baby animals at the petting zoo because they didn't have any binkis. (Now at Brookfield there was a sign at the enterance to the goat area that said NO pacifiers were allowed in so the goats would not eat them, but since a 2 or 3 year old can't read the words and only pictures she thought it meant the baby goats had no pacifiers. We walked up to a zookeeper, who I explained this all to, and gave her our binki for the baby animals).
That night the binki fairy brought my daughter chapstick and a butterfly necklace. No binkis since then!
I have also heard of leaving the binkis on the porch or by your door for the binki fairy to take for the new babies in the world and she leaves you a big kid present in return. Find out what big kid thing motivates your child and use it.
Good luck.

My son was about 3 too. It was very easy, no fairies, no cuts(because of choking) and no bribing with gifts. (If you start that now, they will expect something in return always. My son, had many "binkies". He only used them for naps and bedtime. When I was ready to deal with it, he gradually started losing them, mysteriously. It got down to one at bedtime and that mysteriously got lost in bed too. He knew that was his only one left, so when that got lost, that was it! The funny thing was it really was lost. We said, "oh well, that's it" and dropped the subject. On the first night with out it, he asked for it and I said, it was lost, maybe we'll find it tomorrow. It was forgotten about until he brought it up again the next night and I told him he did fine with out it then I dropped the subject. That was 11 years ago, and my daughter born 18 months after him, never used one.

The funny thing is we really would lose them. About 4 years ago, my husband found one in the lining of his winter dress coat. His pocket had a whole in it. My kids laughed when he pulled it out. My kids were 7 and 8 at that time.

Hi C.,
My daughter was the same way. I took her to the dentist, and he said it was time for her to give it up (she was 2 and 1/2). I gave her a chance to say "goodbye" to her pacy then we got rid of it. We talked about how the dentist said she was too big for it, and that it could hurt her teeth. I could sympathize with her, telling her it's hard to let go of things we really like, but sometimes we have to listen to doctors and dentists (and mommies) because it's best for us in the end. The first two nights were the hardest, but we had cuddle time, and read our stories, said our prayers and stayed with the regular routine minus the pacifier.

She is 15 now, with braces that our about to come off (crowding teeth, nothing to do with a pacifier) and a beautiful young lady. I'll say a prayer for you. A.

Hi my name is L. and my cousin had the same problem that you are facing. He snipped a little of the pacifier off every few days until there was nothing left to suck. I know it sounds crazy but it worked for him. Also, my friend and her daughter took all of the pacifiers and put them in a box to "mail them" to children who did not have pacifiers. When went to the post office to mail them my friend told the postal worker her scheme and to please throw the box away when they left. Good luck with your trials.

C.- The advice that i have gotten with this one is to poke a hole in the nipple of the pacifer. When the child sucks on it they get a different satisfaction and after a couple of times trying it the child should no longer want the pacifer.

Let me know how this works as i am trying to get through the teething stage and then plan to wein my twin boys.

Good Luck
B.

My son was addicted to his paci! He had about 5 of them. Every couple of days or so I would cut one almost completely off. "oh my gosh, your paci is broke. You'll have to throw it in the garbage." After a few days and the fact that the store didn't have any more he had no choice but to get rid of it. I must say, he didn't freak out hardly at all. I also must say he slept great at night but didn't take a nap for 2-3 days.
Good luck!

I just had the same dilema with my little boy, he will be 3 in July. We were worried about taking it away since we had just moved him to a big boy bed, and gave him a beautiful little sister. Anyway, I just decided one day, after a visit to my parents' house, that we were going to take it away. When he asked for it the night that we got home, we just told him that we left it at Grandma's house. I was not sure at first how it would work, but now almost 2 months later he could care less about not having it. He asked for it here and there for awhile, but we would just remind him that we did not have it anymore. So, long story short, if you have somewhere you could "leave" it, I would try that.

My advice is that you have to let HER get rid of it. Either convince her she's a big girl and let her throw it in the garbage herself.
If you have a new baby in your life you can let her give it to the new baby because she's a big girl now.
We also gave it to Santa one time...so maybe if you celebrate Easter write the Easter Bunny a note and give leave it for him from your little one.

But the best way that will not traumatize her is to let her be involved in the giving it up.

C.,

I have 3 daughters who all used pacifiers. Mine were able to give theirs up at 1 1/2, though. I have read about other parents who have their child wrap up the pacifiers and put them under the pillow or somewhere special so that the "Pacifier Fairy" can get them to take to other children. Others hung them on trees outside so the 'fairy' would find them.

Good luck!
B.

Hi,
My son, who is now 21, loved his pacifier too. When he was almost 3, we cut a tiny hole in the nipple, so that when he sucked it, it would go flat. Pretty soon thereafter, he abandoned his beloved "Dah-Dat" [that's what he called it].
Maybe this will work for you too.

I saw this on a tv show and it sounded like a good idea - one that I've kept in the back of my mind in case I need it. Do you have any friends or relatives with infants? If so, try telling your daughter that the baby needs the paci. You can make a big deal out of it where she gives the baby the paci as a gift because he or she needs it, and your daughter doesn't because she's a big girl. Of course your friend won't really use it, but I'm sure she would be willing to play along.

This might even work in a letter to santa kind of way. Put the paci in a box with a letter to a baby who needs it, put it in the mail box (retrieve it later). Explain to your daughter that it's goiung to a new baby because babies need them.

Good luck

I remember when my son (now almost 13 years old!) was barely three and we were going through the same issue. His dentist actually helped us with what to do. He had just had his first dental visit when he turned three. The dentist's advice was to have the "Pacifier Fairy" (like the Tooth Fairy) come and take it away. I prepared him by saying we were going to put his pacifier under his pillow and in the morning the Pacifier Fairy will have left a present for him. In his case it was a video (still VHS way back then!) The dentist did help by talking to my son and telling him that he was a big boy now and that he (the dentist) knew that my son could do this! My son took that well and was excited to get the present! We never had him want the pacifier again! Hope this helps!

I snipped off the tip of the pacifier on an angle, and the next time we got in the car and my daughter wanted her "nana" I gave it to her and she threw it and said "it's broke". I acted supprised and sympathetic. She cried and was mad. We told everyone about the broken pacifier, and they reinforced the bewilderment. I started car snacks. So for a few days, she knew the car pacifier didn't work and it just laid on the seat. She didn't want it. A couple of days later, oh no!, now the bedroom pacifier is broken! I got a baby doll with a pacifier and a little crib to put in her room. She put her broken "nana" in the crib with the baby doll, because "babies need nanas". I put warm milk in a soft top sippy cup and craddled her in my arms while she drank some of it. I laid her down and she held on to her sippy cup and her lambie stuffed animal. I had lullaby music on. After she was asleep, I took the sippy cup out of the room. Within a week she threw the broken pacifier in the garbage and I did the same with the one in the car. She saw some in the store and we both said "babies need those". Whew, it's over. It wasn't easy to hear her cry for something she wanted, but I know it's the begining of the, you can't have everything you want lesson. Helping her build character is just as important as nutrition & education.

I didn't suck a pacifier when I was little but I sucked my thumb. The way my mom broke me of that was she offered a reward to me for "giving up my thumb". I wanted my first Barbie so bad. She said when you quit sucking your thumb you can have it. I had to go so many nights without sucking it but I don't remember how long. It was hard for me but I did it and I got that Barbie doll. Maybe offering her something as a reward will help or getting a new friend to sleep with at night. Hope this helps!!

We had the same problem and had to finally just go cold turkey. We had gotten our son down to only using the pacifier at night when our dentist told us it had to go. We made a ritual out of it, talked for a couple of days about how it was time to give the "binky" to another baby (of course we didn't really give a used pacifier to anyone) and tried to prepare him, then put him to bed without it. He had been excited about being a big boy and giving away the binky, until the time actually came. We had, I think, two pretty miserable nights of our son crying himself to sleep, and that was that. We sat with him and comforted him but did not yield and told him the binky was gone and he was a big boy now. He has never asked for it since, and he did mention a couple of times in the first few weeks that he was too big and his little friend had the binky now. Good luck!

Four of my five were binky kids. I took the binky away from the first two when they were pretty young- with no trauma. The next two were harder. My third one was almost three when I finally got up the nerve. He only used it at bedtime. Three days before his dentist appointment, I got up the nerve. Luckily, the dentist could tell we had just taken it away and backed me up on it. So, from then on I reminded him that the dentist said it would mess up his teeth. When he bit down, there was a gap between his top and bottom teeth where they should have touched. It corrected itself within months of me taking it away.

We just took it away from my fourth child (he's two) last month. We did it cold turkey. He asked for it for about a week, but he's pretty much forgotten about it- unless he finds one from his hidden stash. But, he doesn't mind when I take it away. He just thinks it's a game now.

#5 sucks her thumb, so we're in for a whole new passel of troubles with that!

Good luck!

At three you can reason with her, but you must do it on her level. Remember once you remove the pacifer you CAN NOT give it back to her. My favorite is the binky fairy who collects binkys to recycle for new babies who have no binkys-you leave it(binky) under the pillow and in the morning it has been replaced with a new book, necklace ect..that is your choice.

Hi C..

I didn't have any problems gettiny my oldest daughter off the pacifier, I just took them all away from her right before she was 2 and she really didn't say anything about it. (Every so often, she would appear out of no where with a pacifier that she found somewhere, but I would just take it away from her and, when she wasn't looking, throw it away).

But my sister cut off the ends of all of her daughter's pacifiers and gave them to her and she didn't want them then. Apparently if you cut of the end of the part that goes in their mouths, the child can't suck on it and they lose interest in it. I don't know how my sister thought of it, but apparently it worked for her and I thought it was ingenious.

I just didn't have to bother with anything that sneaky because my cold turkey way worked without realy any problems.

So my suggestion, is either throw away all the pacifiers and don't really say anything other than "Pacifiers are for babies and you're a BIG GIRL" or cut the ends off of all of them. It's like potty training, you might have a couple of days of drama, but after that, it will be OK. And, at the very least, it will give your daughter something to complain about in therapy in 20 years!:) (Just kidding, she'll be fine and dental concerns are a problem which justifies any of your concerns about imposing a cold turkey pacifier ban.)

GOOD LUCK!!

My son is going to 3 in may and we weaned him off of it last jan. we also got it to where he was only taking it at night and naptime. But one night we just decided to that was it. We told him that it was all gone and we just stuck to our guns and never gave it back. It was hard but not as hard as we thought and a lot easier then having dental problems. My friend weaned her son off of it by saying that they had to give it to a friends baby. So that he thought that it was for the baby and he was a big boy now.
Good luck and stay strong

Try going in after she falls asleep and taking it. If that doesnt at least help then I tink your only option would be to just take it from her. Tell her shes a big girl now and big girls dont need pacifiers. My daughter was really big on the big girl stuff and a lot of the time all I had to say was "big girls dont do that" or "big girls do this" ect... Good luck

My daughter was actually 4 when I got rid of the pacifier, but she only used it at night (and half the time it fell out while she was sleeping). I told her that when children turned four the pacifier fairy came and took all the pacifiers so they could renew them and give them to babies who needed them. I don't know if it would have worked at 3, I can't remember if she was into her birthday by then, but it might be worth a shot. Hope that helps.

C.,
My son was attached to his pacifier until the age of three. He was the same way...only in his room (so he wanted to spend lots of time in his room!!). We told him about the "pacifier fairy" too and it worked wonders. He would place it on the back porch and knew that he would get a present in the morning if he left it out there. It took a couple tries (we gave him a few little items if he could leave it out for part of the day/night and then a big present when it was out there for good). It did not take very long at all.....he never thought about it again!! Good luck :)

I have 4 children, 16, 14, 12 and 22 months. All but the last one used a pacifier. On the advice of my peditrician, I told each one once they were about 2 or 2 1/2 that when they were ready to get rid of the pacifier, we would go to a toy store and they could pick out a big girl/boy present, but that all the pacifiers (do a search so none in car, toy box...etc) had to be thrown away at the toy store. We would occassionally talk about, maybe once every two weeks, and each one came to me on their own and said they were ready. We threw them away and that was that. Only one even mentioned it at bedtime, and only the first night. Not sure it will be this easy for you but worked for me.

ps Like you, my children only used at nap and bedtime, so it stayed in their bed/crib.

I would "loose" it, and then tell her since it's lost she gets a new present. I would explain to her that she's just too old to depend on a little plastic thing that's just for babies. Her new present should be something age appropriate for "big girls." Good luck!

Hi,
My son was the same way. He had to have his pacifier with him at all times. The worst part was at night when he would wake up and could not find it in his bed and we would constantly have to get up and look for it or give him another one. He had it in his mouth so much that it started to push his teeth forward. This is when he was 2 and a half. I did not want to just take it from him and someone told me to just cut the tip off. I did not think it would work but it did. He was angry but he still had the pacifier. He just could not suck on it. After about 3 days he did not want it anymore. He will be 3 in a few days. Good luck.

Good morning C.. My daughter took to the pacifier as well. I took it away when she was 2 years old. I think she was ready to give it up because I convinced her that she threw it out and said "she was a big girl now and didn't need it." She went to bed that evening not sure of herself but slept through the night. By the next day, when I picked her up at the sitters she was convinced she got rid of it herself. It worked marvelously. If it hadn't worked I had heard to put a tiny hole at the base of all the pacifiers that she uses and when she tries to suck on it, it won't work like it used to. Another option is to dip them in a flavor that she won't like, like lemon juice. If it tastes sour to her she'll stop using it. Good luck.

C. - This worked for my son...... each day we made a ritual of actually cutting off a piece of the tip with scissors --- you can make up a story of some sort to go along with it. Eventually there was nothing left and he had everything to do with the process :) Hope this helps.

Hi There - I heard of this idea and thought I'd pass it on. Have you heard of those Build-a-Bear Workshop stores? Your daughter can build a bear and place the pacifier into the bear. When she feels she needs the paci she will know its in the bear and hopefully the bear will be the replacement comfort she needs. A man my husband works with tried that with his daughter and it worked! Go figure - men talk about these things too :)

Had the same problem. Tried sooo many things! Told him the "binky fairy" was coming to take it when he was sleeping and he was so upset -- cried like someone told him his doggie died! So, then I felt terrible. We tried another approach which worked in ONE DAY!!! We told him his teeth would stick out and now he's a big boy. We said he could hold it in his hand to still sleep with "binky", but we didn't want his teeth to stick out so he couldn't put it in his mouth anymore. Can't believe it, but it worked. We checked on him a couple hours later and thought he'd have popped it in his mouth, but it was still his hand. It's been a couple weeks, and now he rarely needs it even in his hand. This is amazing b/c he was a total addict with is binky! He's now telling his baby sister she can't have one "because her teeth will stick out." (On a related issue, we had told him his teeth would turn yellow if he didn't brush them -- so suddenly he cares about his teeth -- he brushes b/c he doesn't want them to turn yellow, and he doesn't use a binky b/c he's a big boy and doesn't want his teeth to stick out). Don't know whether this will work for you, but we were AMAZED that it worked for us. I think you have to get in your kid's head to see what will work, keeping in mind their sensitivities. (i.e., the "binky fairy" worked for a friend, but for my son, it was like telling him he'd never see his best friend ever again!)

Good luck! :-)

use a needle/pin and poke a hole in it. each day make the hole a bit bigger & she will quickly get sick of it. we gave ours to a friends baby as a "gift". but the first few nights without it were a bit difficult. by doing it slowly, i think it would be easier on both of you.

My daughter sucked her thumb and I couldn't get her to stop so I left her alone until she stopped on her own. The best way to get rid of a pacifier is to hide it somewhere where she won't find it and tell her it's gone. If you give it to her every night, she will keep expecting it every night...you have to stop giving it to her. She will probably miss it for a night or two but she will get over it. The thumb is a lot harder to get rid of LOL.

I don't know if this is a exactly a suggestion or not, but I can share my story at the least.
We took my son's pacifier away around his 2nd birthday. I had similar feelings - I wanted to do away with it, but I wasn't out to traumatize him. Although he was an only child at the time, he had a habit of "hiding" his paci's around the house. One night, low and behold, he had hidden them all so well we could not find 1! He and I searched the entire house, and about 20 minutes after his bed-time with no luck I was very frustrated and said only half-sincerely, "Your paci's are all gone. I guess you're too big for a paci, now." He was totally calm, said, "ok" and that was that. No more paci's. Ever.
Things were a little tricky over the next couple months, with my husband and I finding stray paci's all over the place all the time. But we would just hide them as quickly as possible, and I was always surprised when my son would bring me one he had found! (so I could put it away, not so he could use it)
I don't know that I'm suggesting you lie and say they're all lost, but remembering that situation has given me endless help as a parent. Sometimes, we're bracing so hard for our children's emotions and reactions we make a bigger deal of a situation than necessary. Maybe she's a little more ready to let go than you think. ??? If you don't think she'll go cold-turkey, you could take a similar approach that might seem less harsh. You could have her collect them all to "give to" a new baby you may know, etc.

Try & make it a goal to get rid of her pacifier at Easter by having "her" give it to the Easter Bunny! This trick has worked wonders for the little ones "giving away their own pacifiers." The key is to have them give it away, not you. She actually has to physically hand over her bag of paci's herself to the Easter Bunny. You can take her to most malls, that do have Easter Bunny's for pics, this time of year. At Christmas, we've had our little cousins (who were also your girls age) give their bag of paci's away to Santa. Once they give it to Santa themselves, they know they can't have it back. Tell her that there are other kids in need of her paci's & that it would be a good idea to let them have them because they really need them. She'll ask for them probably that same night that she gave them away, but remind her that "she" gave it away to the Easter Bunny for the kids who aren't as fortunate & need it. It has worked like magic in our family with our relatives. Put all pacifiers in a plastic bag for her to give to the Easter Bunny. Make sure she doesn't see the Easter Bunny hand you back your bag of paci's. And, remember DON't Cave in when she asks for it, gently remind her that she gave the paci's to the bunny for the other little kids who need them. She'll feel so good that she did such a good thing. Also-of note, my sister is a hygientist & yes, keeping a paci too long, does lead to dental issues unfortunately. Good luck!

I too was worried about weaning my daughter of the pacifier. My mother suggested cutting the tip of it off (looses the cool sucking aspect). Well, my daughter (over a long week-end away) bit the ends of hers. Luckily we noticed before it was off entirely. I told her I didn't have any others (she went thru the three I had with me), and we weren't going to buy any more since she is too old. And she was OK with that. She even went with a family friend for the morning while my mother and I threw a baby shower. She survived the morning and never looked back. So, when my 9 month old reaches the weaning stage, I am cutting the ends off. Good luck!

My friend was in a similar situation with her almost 3 year old. She talked about how she was probably ready to let a baby have the paci and how it would be nice for her to give it to them. She took her and the pacifier to Toys-R-Us and let her pick out a new special gift (the Polly Pocket Cruise Ship worked for her!) The trick was she had to pay for this big girl gift with her pacifier which she gladly turned over to the cashier. She talked about it once in a while afterwards saying she was sad it was gone, but loved her new toy...and was glad some baby would now have it.

my son was over three and I had a hard time w the pacifier to and I didnt want him to walk around w it I hated that thing.well my son really loves monster trucks and I told him if he gave me is nuk I would get him the monster truck that we couldnt find in the stores I had to order it off line well it took about a week for it to get here and when it did I told him ur truck is here and that he needed to give me his nuk to get his truck and he gave it up to me and he has never had it again.so if the is one thing ur kid really loves try that and see what happens or u can try to nuk fairy tell ur little girl that there is a nuk fairy who need other kids nuks to give to needed familys and that if she gives them to the nuk fairy she will bring her something speical back well look luck I hope I help u alittle.

I have the perfect solution. What I did with my three 1/2 year old was during a dentist appointment, I had the dentist tell him how it was time to get rid of the paci. When we got home that day, we went around the house and in a special bag he decorated, and he put all his paci's in the bag. He really got into finding every one!! Then I told him I was going to put them in a safe place and save them for when he has his own babies. He was so into passing them on to his babies, he honesty never looked back. That night he asked for a special blanket to cuddle but he was fine and never went back. Hope this helps.

A. J.

If you can't get her to go with the old "another baby needs this pacifier now, you are a big girl" routine and here is a reward for being so nice to the babies who need it...try this.

A friend of mine used the gradual elimination method and it worked really well. First they took a pair of scissors and cut off a small corner of the pacifier. This made it less satisfying to suck on, but she still had it. Gradually they made the amount larger and larger over the week and by the end of the week it had lost it's appeal without ever being actually taken away.

Hi,

I have had four boys weened from pacifiers with the "Pacifier Fairy" method. We talk about it for a week or so, find out what would be dear to them and then write a letter together to the pacifier fairy talking about what a big boy they are and they don't need it anymore. Then put the letter and a pacifier under the pillow and while they are sleeping we put the dear toy/thing they talked about (which I purchased from the store the same week)in their bed or next to it. When they wake up they don't have pacifiers - I made a count before bed and made sure we got them all - but they do have this new thing. One got construction equipment, another got a bunch of dinosaurs we didn't already have, you just have to find the right thing they are willing to give it up for. I have to say mine were probably more like 3 1/2 or so. And even when the younger ones have one you can talk about how much bigger and older they are that they don't need it - and look at those nice construction trucks the Pacifier Fairy brought you for being so big! Good luck.

Two of my children used pacifiers, and both stopped at age 3. My oldest, like you, was down to just bed and nap time. We left the pacifier on his bed. One day when he was having a bit of a fit, he threw it. We looked all over for it, but couldn't find it so he had to go to sleep without it....that was the end of the pacifier for him.

For my daughter, we told her that when you turn three you give your pacifier to the paci-fairy and she gives you a present (like the tooth fairy.) She then gives the pacifier to "babies" that need them. She was OK with that, and we made a big deal about how big she was.

I hope this helps!

First of all, my orthodontist said that thumb sucking and passifer use does not affect teeth until five-ears-old. So don't be too worried about that. However, the sooner the better. I had a friend who had this problem at three with her son and what happened was he had two passifiers. He chewed a hole in one and she had to throw it away. When he was down to one she said, "Okay, this is your last binky. Once you chew a hole in it. no more binky." Eventually this happened, she threw it away. He cried for a while at nap time and asked for it for a few days and then never worried about it again. Kids are resilient. They will find another coping mechanism to replace the one they lost whether it's a blankie or stuffed animal.

This one may be a little off the wall, but it worked for my sister! My nephew was about 3, and SO attached to his paci! My Mom/Sister went to the zoo one day - and my Mom had the idea to "give the paci to the monkey" that my nephew was watching play!! She simply said - "let's give that monkey your paci so he'll always remember you"! He handed her the paci, Grandma pretended to throw it in....and that was that. He never wanted a paci again. He occasionally asked for it, but they said "you gave it to the monkey remember?"!

Now, you could try this is a friends dog, or even a fish or something....any animal that your daughter seems especially attached to.

Like I said...it's unusual - but it worked!!

ps - no monkeys were injured during this experiment! ;)

At this point I would just throw It away.
It will damage her teeth.

good luck,

Debbie

I have heard a number of ways to rid the pacifier. One is a celebratory one involving helium balloons. Make a big scene about how someone on the other side of the world needs it now and send it on its way... The other is to barely snip the end of the pacifier every couple of days until it no longer has any suction. By now, though, the pacifier probably represents more of an emotional attachment than physical. And of course what you mentioned. Just take it away. My second daughter of three girls was the only one who took one and unbeknownst to us who still gave it to her at night up to 2 1/2 years the babysitter stopped giving it to her for naptime when she reached a year old. They adjust. I potty trained the same daughter in a similar fashion. I ended up just putting underwear on her (at around 2 1/2) and told her "Tweety" doesn't like getting wet or dirty and after a few days she didn't like getting wet or dirty either. (She knew when she needed to go, but she was emulating the baby who had arrived before she had finished potty training.)
Good luck.

The paci-fairy worked well at our house. We gathered up all of the pacifiers, put them in a plastic bag and hung them in a tree outside the house. The next morning, in its place was a baby doll that my daughter really loves, and still remembers is the one that the paci-fairy left. She was 2 at the time, and is now 3, and we haven't really struggled since.

S.

Hi Cristal,

I have a friend who made this suggestion to me however, it necessitates a little (rather, big) white lie. You could tell your daughter that it is customary for the Pacifier Fairy to come on one's third birthday. She collects a big girl's pacifiers -- after all big girls don't need them so much anymore -- then she cleans them up like new, and distributes them to new little babies who need pacifiers to comfort them to sleep. You, being the Pacifier Fairy, could then purchase a few inexpensive new pacifiers and donate them -- on your daughter's behalf, and to rid you of your white-lie guilt -- to a local charity: Purple Heart Veterans, Cancer Federation, Salvation Army, any of those organizations who call monthly to pick up donations from your home. To show her gratitude, the Pacifier Fairy leaves a brand new toothbrush and maybe even a fun new tube of toothpaste (or any other small present you feel is appropriate). At our house, we haven't needed the Pacifier Fairy, but we have called upon the Switch Witch who will take your Halloween candy, minus 10 favorite pieces each child gets to select and keep, and in return leaves a small gift. This year it was a L'il Kinz for each of my two older children, and they never missed the candy for a second. Hope this helps, and good luck!

I see that you have gotten a tremendous amount of responses, but thought that I'd throw my two cents in too. :) I don't have any personal experiences with pacifer attachment, due to neither of my daughters wanting anything to do with them....which now, I'm thankful for. However, my nephew (almost same age as your daughter...will be 3 in June) and was VERY VERY attached to his pacifer. He too was only using it at naptime/bedtime. My sister-in-law tried a number of things...some mentioned in your responses, but nothing seemed to work. Finally, she just said okay "I'm taking it away, tonight." (and picked a night) She said he cried for a bit, but then fell asleep and then the next day at naptime, he cried for a minute or two and that was it. NOTHING since...he doesn't ask for it, talk about it or anything. She thought it would be harder than it was, because like you, she also has another baby (will be 1 in May) and takes a pacifer. But to her amazement it was very easy and only wishes she would have done it sooner.
I don't think it will be as h*** o* her as you are anticipating....I think it's always harder on the parents, just because the anxiety of the "not knowing" how they will respond. I wish you the best of luck!

Hi C.,

I can just see people cringing with how I managed with all three of my kids but it worked three times so here goes.... BRIBERY!! I offered them a substitute, literally anything they wanted to "hold". My kids were younger than your daughter and they still understood the "you really can't have this anymore but... You can have ANY other thing at all that will give you comfort". I guess I was lucky, my oldest developed a major attachment to two of her stuffed animals. They went EVERYWHERE with us. I never minded. My second only had his little toy with him at all times in the house and my littlest guy carried a receiving blanket with him everywhere he went. I believe in having something tangible that is comforting that you can just hang onto when you need it. They are all teenagers now and all of them still have the items they chose and they treat them with much love and will always have the good memories of these things.

For my little guy he woke up one morning (as we were also down to only bedtime pacifier time) and I asked him if he would like to send his pacifier to a baby that really needed one. HE said he did so we marched upstairs and decorated an envelope and put it in the mailbox with the explanation that the mailman would take it to a needy baby and that it would be all gone then. (I think it needs to be clear, not intimidating, but clear what will happen when THEY make the decision to give it away.) He was also promised a prize for being so generous and we went out shortly after "mailing" it and picked up a Thomas train at the store that he was then able to take to bed with him.

The first night went well, but the next 3 were a little rough...but we got through it with some extra love and care. I strongly caution that once this method is used you DO NOT bring the pacifier back out no matter how hard it gets!!! Just sitting next to his bed those few nights and rubbing his back and validating his feelings worked!!

Now he has a baby sister and does just fine seeing her pacifier and not expecting one for himself.

Also I have had 3 other children (my son's friends) use this method and it worked with flying colors.

Good Luck, know that it will be a bit painful, like a breakup with your first boyfriend...all you can do is comfort her but know that it's all for the best.

Our two kids gave their binkies to Santa. It would be perfect for your Daughter to give them to the Easter Bunny.

We left them out for when Santa came and he "gave them to other babies/kids who needed them".

My son used it a bit more than my daughter so he was a little harder. He asked for it now and then after but it all worked out.

It was a great idea. Hope this helps. :)

My three year old son was a pacifier junkie. We also limited the pacifier to just bed time. I decided to put an end to the pacifier once and for all. It was 2 months prior to Easter. I told him that the Easter Bunny doesn't bring toys and candy to little boys who still use a pacifier. That night he gave it up. Everyday he would remind about the Easter Bunny. I asked him what special toy he would like the Easter Bunny to give him... it was a rubber lizard. Done, that is what he received. With Easter just around the corner this may work for you too! Good Luck.

Hi C.,

We tried the cutting the ends off trick, but that didn't seem to work, so we eventually cut our daughter off cold turkey for night time when she was 18 months. It was a rough night, she was like an addict clamoring for a fix, quite rabid, she actually fell out of her crib she was so agitated. We brought her to bed to sleep with us and then she was fine after that. She would occaisonnaly ask for the pacifier, but didn't respond negatively when we said "no".

Someone else suggested telling your child that you are giving the pacifiers to other babies. That sounds like a great idea. One of our friends told their 3-year old that they had to leave the pacifiers for the baby squirrels, and their child helped them pack the binkies in a shoe box and leave them under a tree for the baby squirrels. That technique may work for you since your child is a bit older. Our daughter was too young at the time to understand that.

Good luck!

D.

Hi C.,

I was in the same boat with my first daughter. Fortunately it was around christmas time and we told her that the baby reindeer needed the pacifiers. We left her "plugs" on the plate for santa with the milk and cookies and a note telling him what they were for. She never questioned it or asked about them. Since Christmas is passed, maybe you could use the easter bunny instead?

good luck
C.

Hi, just throw them all in the garbage. Don't buy anymore. She'll cry for two weeks, she'll want to take them away from other babies, but in the end she'll be fine. Your supposed to do this at 1 year. What happened mom? lol I know how it goes some things you're good at and other things get left behind. My son wasn't potty trained till 4 years, so I know.

You also have a 1 year old, so all bottles and all pacifiers need to be thrown away TODAY!!! Be strong mom, they'll both be crying (the 3 year old is your fault, you could've had her done with this 2 years ago) but at least you'll know why they're crying. You are a stay at home mom, this is your job. To take away these "baby things (bottles and pcifiers)" because they ARE too old for them now. With my 6 year old it was easy, because both the nipples for his bottle and his brand of paci's were disontinued right before he turned one year. So I really couldn't just go buy another one. Act like that is the case with your children's things. This is easy it's manners, and picking the nose that's hard.

Good luck, be strong, and DO IT TODAY!

I have two little girls (4 and 3) and neither of them use a pacifier. However, they both did at one time. My youngest was very easy to ween off of it because when her sister didn't have one, well she didn't want one either! The trick I think is to truly understand why she uses it (comfort, anxiety, routine, etc) and then replace it with something else like a doll or a different bedtime rountine. As adults, we really do the same thing.... also you need to make it "special." Our "binky" went to the binky fairy. Just like the tooth fairy we put her binky under the pillow and then it just disappeared. If you ask her today.. the binky fairy took it- like no big deal.. and we LOVE fairies! :)so good luck!

Honestly, it was harder on me than it was on my son to get rid of his and he was closer to three as well. If I knew then what I knew now, I would have gotten rid of it at two :) Anyhow, he actually lost it at my Mom and Dad's one day,(we live about an hour away from them) and I was frantic, I was going to stop at Walgreen's on the way home, etc., then I thought, why? I have been putting this off, and putting this off, this was my sign it was time. When we got home it was near bed time, and he asked where it was and I said it wwent "bye bye." THen he tells me it went "bye byue in a green car to Nonna"s house." I said that's right. He was little bit upset that night about it going "bye, bye", really upset the second night(probably took him a good 1/2 hour of crying to fall asleep), and by night three he was fine. The really funny thing was the next time we went to my parents(probably a week or two later) he new exactly where his binky was, he got tols me "see, went bye bye to Nonna's house" and threw it in the garbage. I hope this hepls...good luck.

Hi C.,
I have a few suggestions. One, take a needle & poke holes in the nipple. The sucking sensation won't be the same & your little one will decide they no longer need it. If you haven't already, have your daughter use it only at sleep time. When she wakes up make a big deal of leaving the binky behind. Do this leading up to my last suggestion...Lastly, have a going away party for the binky. Invite friends, talk about it for weeks, & have a celebration to say goodbye to her friend. Tell her she is a big girl now & big girls don't need pacifiers. Good luck!

I have heard people say they found a friend with a baby. Explain to your little girl that she is a big girl now and she doesn't need a paci but baby _____ does. She needs to give her paci to the new baby so that he can sleep at night. Then have the baby come over or go visit him and give him the pacifier.

That happened to me with my godgranddaughter she wasn't quite that old but I felt she was to old to have a pacifier. I would say to her not for and would use her name it's for babies and you are a big girl and that did work. She would pick it up and say to me not for ---- and I would say yes and she eventually just stop wanting it at all.

Our son started preschool and we just stopped bringing it wiht us when we dropped him off, so that took care of the daytime binky. But, he still uses his at night, too. He puts it in his mouth, falls asleep, and it falls out. So, I am not really too stressed about it. He also has his blankie and stuffed dog, so I think eventuallly this year we will stop giving it to him at bedtime too.

When my daughter was about that age we rounded up the many pacifiers and put them in a cute gift bag and tied it up with the curling ribbon. We left a note for the "Binky Fairy" saying that we wanted her to take all of Katie's old binkys to the new little babies who still needed them now that Katie was such a big girl. In the morning the "Binky Fairy" left Katie a nice little gift with a thank you note. It seemed to work really well.
I hope you have good luck and can find something that will work as well for you!

I'm a "cold turkey" kind of mom when it comes to pacifiers, but I also am very much a "take it away BEFORE they're attached" kind of mom. Both of my girls were only waking at night at six months old because they'd lose their pacifier. So, we took them away and they've never had them since. If your one year old is attached, break her now or you'll be going through the same thing in a couple of years.

If you've tried gradually and she still won't give it up, cut her from it completely. It's harder for you than it was for me since your daughter can now ask for it, so make a little calendar for her with four or five days on it. Starting it today and ending it on Sat would be perfect. It's long enough for her to feel she can get used to the idea it's going, but short enough where she can't extend that date out even longer.

Make a calendar for her, nice and big and exciting to make it a big, fun event for her. She'll see it's a GOOD thing she's getting rid of it. Have her cross off the days in the morning. Let's say Sat night is the last night she'll sleep w/ it, on Sun morning have her cross off Sat night and then put her pacifer in a box and say good bye to it. Talk her up about how PROUD you are of her and have a little "big girl gift" for her. Perhaps it can be a NEW something for her to sleep with like a new doll or stuffed animal of a favorite chartoon charactor. My daughter loves sleeping in dress-up clothes once in a while so perhaps something pretty to slepe in.

One thing a friend of mine did was send the pacifier to the "Binx Fairy". This fairy gave all the new babies in the world the pacifiers of children who are now big boys and girls. It made her daughter feel really good that she was giving a new baby her pacifier. She even drew the baby a picture for the fairy to give!

You know your daughter's personality. You also know you want her to give up the pacifier. So, although she may not like it, you need to get rid of it. Unfortunately, our parenthood will be FILLED with things we have to do that our kids won't like! I think pacifiers are the first big thing! :)

Good luck!

Hi, im a mom of older sons(25,22, 19), the oldest loved his binky and i did the same things you are, then i took him to the toy store with his binkys (three) to buy a toy with the binkys and payed for the new cool toy he picked out, with handing over the binkys to the cash girl, who did take them to thow out. i thought this was brilliant! well he still remembers it and still thinks it was the dumbest thing (that i did),. that night when he was going to bed he wanted the binkys and would not touch that toy ever again. soo i guess if i did it again i would let him have the binkys till he got rid of them him self.( i am a dental asst. and there seems to be no long issue with pacifiers,it just wont fit in her mouth as she grows). my son is a wonderful man lives and works in colorado is a microbiologist at a miro brewery, so i guess it has worked out. so many times i tryed too hard when i look back. good luck they do grow up and tell you the dumb things you did. love to you. J.*

My kids actually refused to take a pacifier after they turned one - so I got lucky and never had to go through this but I did read about something that might help. There is a book or set of books about kids and their pacifiers and includes a mailing envelope. The books are about sending the paci back to a special land where they live with other paci's and you then "mail" the paci back to the special land so it can be with its friends(or something close to this idea). Maybe after reading the story enough times your child will want to mail it off. I just thought this was a neat idea. Hopefully it will help.

Hi C.!!

Someone at work had that same problem with their daughter and they had her put it in an envelope and mail it to the paci fairy (which was really her Grandma's address) and then she left a new toy under her pillow from the paci fairy. She said it worked for her, maybe it would work for you. Hope this helps!! Good luck!!

C.~

I clipped the tip (not very much) off of her pacifiers and my daughter stopped using hers almost immediately. She just didn't like it that way. She was about 1 1/2 when we did it.
Hope this helps.

Suggestion....don't do it to all of them at once!! At least not until you know her reaction. Start with one and make only that one available to her.
For your own sanity, keep a few in tact until she is done with them.

Good luck!
LB

I took away the pacifier when my son was 15 months, I just decided that enough was enough and just took it away. I must admit he was not very attached to them but used it mainly at night time, it was hard putting him to bed for about a week but he got over it afterwards, I just made sure there were none in sight. Your son is a little older and these are things that I heard some parents did ( I am preschool teacher ) with their 3 year olds: One mom told her daughter that cousin so and so who was a baby need a pacifier and we should give them to her, so they put all the pacifiers in a big envelope and wrote the address and mom pretended that it got mailed. Another parent put them inside a bag and hang it on the tree outside the house and told the daughter that the fairy will take them away and bring you something very special, so indeed they hang a doll there. These tricks seemed to have worked with these kids I just hope it will work for you. Good luck

my son was 4 when we finally got rid of the pacifier. i took him to build a bear and had him put it inside the bear as he was making it. he's 7 now and still has the bear he named "binky". although it was still a little difficult at night, but as i recall the worst of it only lasted a few days.

Hi C.!
Our son had speech issues. So pacifier and sippy cups had to be taken away without much weaning. Straw cups replaced sippy cups and we helped him get his oral fixation with crunchy foods and chewy foods.
Good luck!
S. in Lisle

Hi!
I was in the same boat you are in now. My daughter turned 3 last August and I thought I would never be rid of the "pa-pa"! Her older sister went cold turkey, one month before her 2nd b-day, and here the second child still had it at 3! I did the same thing you are trying and weaned her down to where there was nothing left to wean. So a couple weeks before her 3rd b-day, I started making a very big deal about how she was going to be such a big girl when she turned 3, and how big girls don't need pa-pa's anymore. So everyday up until the day, I reminded her that on her birthday there would be no more pa-pa's b/c she was a big girl and not a baby. And it worked. That night after her party, we threw away, (she helped), all her pa-pa's! I had to keep reminding her for the next few nights, how big she was and how proud I was of her!

Hope this helps, and good luck!! :)

Hi there -
we were in the same boat with my oldest son (who was also almost 3 when he gave up the pacifier) and eventually we gave it to the pacifier fairy and she brought him a truck he really wanted. We made a box (out of a stationary box) that had a fairy on the top and had a goodbye "ceremony" one night and he put the pacifier in the box and went to bed without it. The next morning there was a truck where the box had been with a note from the pacifier fairy telling him that she was so proud and the pacifier was given to a baby who really needed it. We talked about doing this for at least two weeks and about what would happen so that made it a little easier for him to give it up. We also made sure that we did lots of activities during the day so that on the night he gave it away he was pretty tired. He asked for it a few times in the days following giving it up but it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be!

Good luck!!

Everything I've read said that children should give it up by two to avoid dental problems. My hubby was the one that insisted that our second child give it up at two. Mommy didn't have the heart. She didn't get it during the day unless she disappeared and I would find her hiding behind the rocker in her room sucking away on it. She knew it was only for night-night, but if she passed the room and looked in it would call to her I"m sure..

My brother-in-law and his wife came up with an ingenious idea. They snipped a tiny hole in their sons. He very quickly realized it didn't suck the same and asked in his two year old lingo what was wrong with his pacey. Dad explained it was broken and time to throw it away. They took him to the trash and he threw it away. He whined about it a little but daddy kept telling him it was broken and it was soon over. (better for dad to do bedtime during this time from our experience since dad seems to be less affected by the tears of the little ones).

With my daughter my neighbor came to pick up her kids and Milena ran downstairs with hers in her mouth. (she had disappeared a few minutes earlier) My neighbor picked her up and asked what a big girl was still doing with a baby pacifier in her mouth and talked her into throwing it away. Milena put it in the trash herself. She whined a night or two, but then was over it. She's three now and if given the opportunity will stare longingly at one of her cousins pacifiers. She's even been known to try to take it out of the car seat, but she hasn't put one in her mouth that we know of.

Hope one of those helps.

Neither of my boys took a pacifier past 5 months so I was lucky. But I had a friends child that wouldnt give it up. So what we did was, we had another friend who had a baby. We took her pacifiers and had her put them in a baggie and told her it was time to give the baby her pacifiers, because he needed them. So since she was a big part in it, it was easier to take them away. We then went to that friends house and she handed our friend the bag of pacifiers and she made a big deal about how the baby would love them. After we left she threw them in the trash....Get her involved somehow...Good Luck

You could try "donating" her pacifiers to babies who might really love them the way she does. The idea of giving something to babies appeals to most 2 year olds. Outside of that, she may have to quit cold turkey. You're right - that pacifier will ruin her front teeth, could cause a high roof in her mouth and may contribute to speech impediments.