Seeking Advice - Tunkhannock,PA

Updated on August 16, 2008
T.S. asks from Tunkhannock, PA
15 answers

I have two daughters, one is 15 and the other is 12. My youngest daughter just got her period, and my oldest daughter has not yet gotten hers. I have already spoken to our family doctor about the 15 yr old, and she said not to even worry about it until she is 16 yrs old. Has anyone ever gotten similar advice? I am going to take her to see an OB/GYN as soon as I can, however I'm afraid the whole situation might also create some sibling friction. Any thoughts?

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L.V.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I didn't start until I was almost 16. Neither did one of my sisters. My other sister started when she was 12. We all have children now so it has not effected fertility or anything. Everyone just develops at their own pace.

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T.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I did not get my peroid till i was 19 and it causes endomeatosis and i have had a hard time with it. But i was very active and ran track for years and when i stopped then i got my peroid. I now have a 15 year old that did not start and i took her to the drs and they said not to worry till she is 16 and then they will do something. But every body is different so i would ask your dr and see what he/she says.
take care Jade

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G.S.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Is your daughter very active? Sometimes athletes can have irregular periods and in young girls being active can delay the start of menstruation. I think taking her to the doctor will really help. Not to alarm you but my friend doesn't stopped getting her period and it was due to a tumor in her brain, completely harmless otherwise, but it made her stop getting her period. She was still able to get pregnant. I would try to keep your oldest daughter's health issues as private as possible in order to prevent sibling friction or if they get along well, your younger daughter could be a good support for your oldest daughter. Good luck with things.

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B.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

I would not worry one bit about it. My sister got her period at 11 and I was 14 when I got mine. It will come when it's ready to flow. One day when she least expects it she will get it. I wouldn't take her to a doctor yet. Wait til she's 16 like they said and I'm sure it will come before then.

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C.H.

answers from Allentown on

why cause friction? Are they both developed the same? pubic hair? breasts, etc?

how old where you when you had it first?

Does the older do lots of sports while the other not?

You say she got it is it reg? or just once?

Wouldn't be that worried either.

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H.L.

answers from Harrisburg on

My daughters are now 16 and 14 ...but my youngest started her period at age 11 1/2 and the older one (stepdaughter) about 6 mo later. so about age 14. Then when the older one got her it was irregular so after asking her docter and doing some reasearch we found that an irregular diet my cause irregularity. She was to the docter and had some bloodwork which the results showed she was low in sodium.(which can come from a poor diet) Once she got to regular eating habits...(got out of the ..i have to diet and eat salads coz all my friends do) Then she got more regular.
All teens are different. Is she underweight or having other health issues? I wouldn't worry until the doc says you need to.

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D.T.

answers from Philadelphia on

I have a fraternal twin sister who got her period when she was 14. I did not get my period until I was 16! Besides the fact that I loved it b/c I didn't have to bother with it for two more yrs. after her, I was very active playing three sports in high school (each season). It's funny because I remember my mother telling me that if I didn't get it by the time I turned 17 she was going to take me to the gyno! Oh no, I thought, and I got my period within the next two weeks! I wouldn't worry too much about it and let your older daughter know that she will be fine - and look at the bright side she has gotten three "period free" years beyond her sister!!

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E.J.

answers from York on

I did not get my period until I was 15 also and have had no issues since. My 2 older sisters got theirs much earlier. I went to the gyn also with my mother and told it was normal. I think we all mature on our own schedules. I developed everywhere else very early though, I was wearing a b cup by 7th grade. I'm sure your daughter will be/is just fine.

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M.L.

answers from Allentown on

Hi T.. I would take your older daughter to a gynecologist. Sometimes I think the pediatricians don't know enough, but at least a specialist can give you the best advice. As for sibling friction, maybe if you don't make a big deal of it they won't, either?

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J.M.

answers from Scranton on

Hi T.,
I am a physician assistant and work in family practice. This is a common issue for young women. It is normal to let a girl go until 16 with out a period with out investigating it. When a girl starts menstruating often depends on genetics and also how much body fat they have. If your 15 year old is very thin or active in sports, it may be completely normal for her not to have gotten her period yet. Hope this helps.

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I'm sorry but I was reading the first advice you got and I completely disagree with it and I had to respond to it. I am the older daughter in my household and I got my period when I was ten years old. My younger sister got hers at 14 and with our age difference, that put almost 7 years in between our getting our first periods. Our mom was completely open and honest about the differences between girls going through puberty and that made things easier on both of us. I never felt like I had to hide the fact that I had gotten my period, even though I was in high school getting it every month and my sister had never even gotten her first one. There was never any kind of sibling rivalry or hurt feelings because of the honesty of our mom and her overall calmness about it. The more she sees you worrying about it, the bigger and issue it seems.

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H.F.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Every girl is different. I am the oldest of 3 girls. I got my first period when I was 10 years old (which also happened to be before my aunt who was 5 years older than me). My sister got hers when she was 15. My other sister was about 16 and has only ever been regular when she is on the birth control pill BUT is healthy. That's just her normal.

Don't worry about your 15 year old yet. Your doctor was telling you the absolute honest truth. Every girl is different and it might not be her time yet. Personal advice my Mom gave my sister on the issue, "Don't rush to get your period. Honestly, once you have it for a few months, you will be wishing it back away."

All that said, she is of the age where it is about time to see the OB/GYN. I would keep the appointment or make it if you haven't already. But when you call them, let them know that she hasn't yet started to have her menses. Until anyone tells you there is something to worry about, don't worry about this one.

Good luck.

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E.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

OK it was a long time ago but I didnt get my period till I was almost 16. I was also active tall & slim. Im sure I didnt eat well either. No two siblings are alike my other sister got hers at 12 too, so same family different kids, different times.
Good luck with the girls.

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C.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

I would be truthful with your daughter...getting your period is not all you "think" it might be and you will be happy much later in life that you started later. I was close to 15 when I got mine and didn't care that my sisters had theirs...when I saw a girl at school getting it in the 6th grade I was surprised...now it's not uncommon but she was much more mature then the rest of us.

I agree with other responders...look at the differences in your children is one more active, one heavier/thinner these all could influence why they have/havne't gotten their cycles.

One thing you may want to watch for is signs that she is having mood swings/hormonal changes and that could tell you if she is getting ready to get it...i have several friends who recently noticed changes in moods etc and it was a few months later thier daughters started with their cycle.

As I mentioned before...tell her life comes at you fast enough enjoy the "freedom" while she has it and deal with the monthly issues when they arrive.

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T.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

I would work on preventing that sibling friction. Perhaps talk to your younger one about how the situation makes the older one feel, seeking her compassion and asking her to mute any enthusiasm she might feel, at least while her sister is arounf. Then keep things private for the older one, if she is self conscious about it. There's no reason that the younger one needs to know that you are taking the older one to the dr. about this, etc., if it may be or create an issue. Some of my friends did not get their periods for a while, and I remember 16 being the magic number for taking them to the doctor, way back then...I would see a GYN and, if necessary, an endocrinologist. Good luck.

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