W.L. asks from Portland, OR on April 01, 2010
Secondary Infertility - Portland,OR
So here goes. I have a wonderful four year old and had a miscarriage last March (11.5 weeks). My husband and I have actively been trying for a year now to get pregnant after the miscarriage. I have used the OV-watch, been charting my temp for four months, using pre-seed for two months, did 8 sessions of acupuncture and yet again this month no luck. Does anyone have any advise on how to keep hope? My husband says he is not worried we are both young he is 34 I am 30. He doesn't understand why I get so frustrated.
A.T. answers from Portland on April 03, 2010
THe first person i would go see is Dr. Sarah Whiley ###-###-#### she specializes in Mayana Abdominal massage for infertility & pregnancy. Amazing, great results. Good luck!
M.S. answers from Provo on April 01, 2010
I am sorry...I feel your loss. I have lost 16 babies. I was told I could never have a baby. I was hurt, mad, frustrated did not like anyone or anything pregnant and wondered what did I do to deserve this! You name it I had it Trisome 13 baby. tubal pregancy...on and on no reason nothing just...must not be your time. I can't tell you how I hate that. Needless to say everytime I had my period I cried and cried. Guess what I stopped trying and I have now have 5. I could not stop them from coming. I have two 10 1/2 months apart. I swear all my prayers got answered at once. I would cut out a lot of your sugar and soda. get the best diet you can, like Organic diet which helped me. I found this place a few months ago for nutrition and I love it, I only wish I had found it long ago would have made my life easier. www.myactivz.com/ilux Also, after you do the deed stay on your back but roll from one side to the other very slow, you may have a little bit of a titled uteruis, if so this will help. I am also a birthing Doula it helped me coupe with me thinking I may not have babies but now I almost have a basketball team.
J.P. answers from Boise on April 01, 2010
If you have been trying for a year, I would say go to a specialist. Either your OB or a fertility doctor. They can run tests and see if there is anything they can do to help you. You are both young, and you are probably stressing about it a little too, which doesn't help. Believe me, I understand your frustration, and took my own advice. I am now due in 5 weeks with my second.
K.F. answers from Seattle on April 02, 2010
I suffered from secondary infertility as well. I conceived with my oldest the first month that we stopped using birth control. The next pregnancy was the same thing....first month without birth control and I was pregnant. However that pregnancy ended in a miscarriage.
After the miscarriage, we started actively trying to get pregnant. I began charting my temp. After a while I did acupuncture, tried pre-seed, and took a whole bunch of vitamins (suggested by the acupuncturist). After 6 months, my OB ran a bunch of tests. Everything checked out. After a few more months she decided an HSG was worth a shot. (This is a test to see if your fallopian tubes are clear). She noted that rates of pregnancy go up significantly the month of this test. At the same time she also referred us to a fertility specialist. (I was 36 at the time and we had been trying to get pregnant for 10+ months). We met with the fertility specialist a few days before the HSG and set out plans to start intrauterine insemination (IUI) in a couple of weeks.
It wasn't necessary. We conceived following the HSG and never started with the IUI. I can't say it was the HSG or just a change in my mindset. At the fertility specialist's recommendation, I stopped charting my temp. My husband and I also decided to take a break from the scheduled sex we had been doing month after month.
My suggestions to you are to ask your OB about getting and HSG. Also get your husband tested. If you hit the 12 month mark, ask for a referral to see a fertility specialist. Also, it might be worth putting away the charting, temping, ovulation checking.
A.S. answers from Boca Raton on April 01, 2010
Don't have the answers but wish you much luck.
It frustrates me that not one doctor ever told me how quickly my fertility would likely decline once I hit my 30's (I had my two at 24 & 27 and wanted another in my early 30's). I opted to NOT do fertility treatments - since I had two already I wasn't willing to go to extraordinary measures (now if it happened naturally - great!).
In the last couple of years I have seen several articles on the topic (rapidly declining ferility in 30's). Women need to hear more about this earlier in their lives.
R.J. answers from Dallas on April 01, 2010
You ARE still young! We are trying again too and no luck yet. So I understand the frustration and how limiting it is when your life becomes chopped into two week segments. And how hard it is when you find out you aren't pregnant each month. My husband and I went to a reproductive specialist for our first. And it still took us two years. When I finally did get pregnant it was when we were on a break from trying. I am sure I still had Clomid and other drugs in my system and that probably helped. Sometimes just trying to stop thinking about it helps. I know that is nearly impossible but the stress of "trying" sometimes makes it harder to conceive. Have you seen a reproductive specialist? They might be able to help by prescribing Clomid or something else. Good luck, keep hoping and know you aren't alone!
F.C. answers from Tampa on April 01, 2010
I suffered from Secondary Infertility as well and had 2 losses between my first daughter born 1/97 and my second daughter born 5/02. What i learned from me was that I suffered from PCOD (some refer to it as PCOS), for me weight and stress were also issues, literally I lost 40+ pounds, exercised and ate healthier and then it happened. I would suggest that you relax and stop stressing b/c that will have an effect on your body, start going out for walks, go to the gym and enjoy your 4yo and husband. Also to make you smile and relax some, I had come to the realization that I would never have a 2nd baby and I packed up and got rid of A TON of my daughter's baby toys/clothes and guess what 3weeks later I found out I was pregnant with DD #2 :)
A.H. answers from Seattle on April 02, 2010
I am sorry to hear about your miscarriage. That is very difficult. I also had secondary infertility & had 3 miscarriages after the birth of our son (2 between 10-11 weeks). Given your age, your husband is probably right -- you have nothing to worry about. Having said that, you live in an area that undoubtedly has excellent medical doctors. I would go to a fertility specialist, so that they can do some basic bloodwork. I found that my thyroid was off, which can contribute to miscarriages. The fix is very easy -- a little pill every day. Or your hormones may be slightly off, especially given the time of your miscarriage. Again, there are hormones that fix that (they are inexpensive). Good luck. Our story ended with the adoption of a beautiful baby girl, who is now 5 mos. old. It has been nothing but a positive experience.