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Second Baby Shower with Second Child??????

I am a mom to an almost 5 year old boy and am expecting a baby girl at the end of October. My son and new daughter will be five years apart. My close friend wants to throw me an intimate baby shower for this pregnancy because she feels having a girl after 5 years deserves a bit of "showering." I feel a little awkward as I have read in the past that two showers is tacky. Her argument is that because I have no "girlie" things and much of my old gear/equipment is ruined through three household moves, she believes it's ok to have a small shower with close friends. (It's totally true that we are out of the baby loop) So, I feel torn...especially about making a registry!!! Any thoughts??

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I have two kids and I had a shower for my second. I did not have one for the first because I lived away but my co-workers had one for me.

My first was a boy and second was a girl. So I understand and yes...have another shower. It's not tacky. It's fun. baby equipment changes and safety regulations usually get better so go ahead and enjoy this pregnancy...register!!!

Who cares what people think. Celebrate!


I just attended a neighbor's 2nd child baby shower. It wasn't tacky in the slightest (she was having another girl, but the sister was 5 or 6 yrs older). EVERYONE loves shopping for baby stuff and seeing all the new little baby "garb" items they've come up with (in this instance you'll have to ask for the "little sister/big sister" items as well! Relax and enjoy. If anyone thinks it tacky, they need only attend and they will realize, hey, this is kind of fun. If only for a reason to party, have a great time and enjoy!

GO FOR IT!! You deserve a baby shower....after 5 years and now a girl I think its fine....we gave my close friend a shower for her second daughter...her kids were 7 years apart and much had changed since the birth of her first...dont feel weird or torn...Again I think you deserve it!!

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When I got pregnant with my forth, my friends did the same for me, but it was a surprise. We planned a girls night out for dinner, and they showed up bearing gifts. Personally, I don't think second baby showers are tacky,as long as they are kept to your closest family and friends. However, I wouldn't go as far as making a registry. I would just hint or flat out tell your friends what you need. You already know about the shower. If it's only a couple of people, just pick 3 or 4 big things and everyone can chip in. The "girlie" clothes and stuff will come when she actually arrives. My friends got me a high end diaper bag, a bathrobe and slippers for the hospital, a basket of newborn neccesities,and a gift card for Babies r Us. Believe me, small get togethers are great. I also hosted one. I made a special dinner, and we all just hung out on the couch, laughing and talking about old times. That was great too! Whatever you do, good luck and congrats!

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Enjoy this time and go for the "spinlkle" Here is a little poem we used for my sister in law's shower and she was in the same boat.
Pins, Diapers and Bottle Galore
Kristin and Ed are having one more
Big Brother Ryan has plenty to share
This is only a "Sprinkle" to show that we care
Please Join us to celebrate before she is due
Let's be sure she's wearing PINK, not blue

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Hi B.,

congratulations on pregnancy and for having such a good friend who wants to celebrate your impending girl.

i had 2 showers. first was bigger and more people. second was because i will have first boy in 2 generations of my family!
so my mom wanted to do something nice for me with a few of my friends at a restaurant. it was special. no big party, but i did need boy things for sure and its nice to welcome every baby in some way!

Hey Rockin'Mom, first of all whomever told you that a second baby shower is tacky is completely wrong. Seriously? Last I checked EVERY baby is special and should be welcomed to the world just as much as the first one. I have a wonderful network of friends who threw me a baby shower for all three of my pregnancies. And I didn't ask for any one of them. In fact my third shower was a complete surprise and I was shocked. From one Denville mom to another, grab that baby shower and run with it!!! Go gor it girl, you and your baby deserve a shower. And not for nothing, you need one!!

Hi B.,

I just went through the same thing! I have a daughter that is 3 and I just had a baby on June 28th. I questioned the whole second shower thing but my sister wanted to have me a shower to get some blue. It was a small shower and she actually did a brunch type thing with a few games and it lasted about 2 hours. She didn't call it a baby shower but a mommy's shower. She also had a basket for the big sister. It was really cute and it made my daughter feel special. My friends and family all bought her something small such as sidewalk chalk, bubbles, etc.

I did register and it was well worth it. Don't feel it is tacky. Have the shower and register!


As long as it is kept SMALL I think it would be OK. However, I would not register! Have fun.

Let your friend throw the shower! With my first it was a combined effort between relatives and myself. But if you are having another baby and someone else throws the shower, thats fine. Especially five years later, you've probably gotten rid of the unisex stuff like the tub and playpen. Have Fun!

Hi B.,


I think that you should go forthe second shower. I am trying for baby #2 and my family will be throwing me a shower when the time comes. Whoever doesn't wantto attend doesn't have to. You will need Girlie things and what better way to receive them than by friends and family.

Good luck and plan away...

as long as you dont invite the people you arent close to who will feel obligated to come, instead only those who view your relationship close and arent the type to be all stuck on proper etiquette(but in the same breath, make sure to invite those who would be offended if not). today, there are so many 2nd marriages, people are familiar with 2nd time showers anyway. in you case, just ask they only say its a sprinkle, and knowing the people, decide to register depending on them and the overall idea the friends invisioned. honestly, as l,ong as its casual like at someones house, no one would think ill of it. good luck, little girls are great and women love buying girl things. you will have a great time and nice puictures for her baby book:)

Definitely have your shower! You deserve it! :)

It's actually not that uncommon to have a small, second shower. And registering is actually a really good idea, especially when your second child is a different gender. That way people can also use that to buy holiday presents that they know you'll use.

You're lucky to have such an awesome friend. Let her spoil you!

Yes, a large baby shower for a 2nd baby can be tacky. However, something small, ntimate, and low key would be appropriate.

I would not register. If you invite only close friends and family, they'll have a sense of the items you'll need. You could also let the hostess know of a few special items that you would like.


I'm having the same issue with my friend - she's having her second baby and her son will be almost 5 when the new baby comes. So I am throwing her a very intimate shower. I am going to invite just close friends and family, do it in my home - very low key. I think that's the classy way to do it.

I would STRESS to her to NOT have one. I know many people that have been invited to 2nd baby showers and there were NOT happy. They went out of obligation and were not thrilled with the idea. So even though some ppl won't mind the majority will and you don't want that. You don't want to be at your baby shower wondering who is annoyed with being there. Just go shopping and buy yourself some new items! Maybe family memebers will get you some new things on their own!

Do It ! And have a good time while your at it. If you friend wants to shower you in this great time of joy, please let her and anyone else that wants to get in on it. In a case like this though I wouldn't register, let people get you what they will, its less presumptious. Congratulations and have a good time.


Love the idea of a Sprinkle!

A friend taught me the expression, "Don't steal my grace." In other words, if your friends want to do this for you, and they will take joy in doing so, then why not? A gracious thank you is always more appreciated than an "oh you shouldn't have." Don't detract from their pleasure - simply enjoy their generosity.

Have the shower!!! I'm a mom of two boys, almost 7yrs apart. I was given 3 showers with my first son and had one with my second, while still in the hospital! I think it's great your friend wants to throw you a second baby shower! It's a blessing, many mothers haven't had any!

My son and daughter were 7 years apart (son first, then daughter). One of my best friends gave me a little girlie party with other close friends; less than 10 people,very low-key. We had a great time. I didn't register or anything, but we had a wonderful time "oohing" and gushing over all the little clothes and toys. It was a wonderful experience, and it's nice that your friend wants to do it for you. That's what girlfriends are for, right? As for it being tacky, your're not demanding or even expecting anything; you're just celebrating with your closest friends. Nothing tacky about it!

Another friend of mine did something different; when she was pregnant with her third baby, she arranged a "spa" day. A bunch of us went and got manicures/pedicures/facials, and then we went back to her place for lunch. She wanted to do something special to celebrate the new baby with her friends, and she didn't need a shower (3rd baby, after all!). It was a relaxing and fun experience for everyone.


Just kidding:-)

First of all, congratulations on #2. This is your first girl. No way is it tacky to have a second shower.

You are incredibly lucky to have someone that wants to do this for you. Let her. She's doing it from the heart for her good friend. Unfortunately, there are many out there who would appreciate such a gesture, but they have no one to initiate it, and have to eventually spring for the new baby themselves. So, go ahead and get your registry started!

Enjoy & Have Big Fun!!!!

Mom of three. Boy (shower), Girl 2 years later (shower), Girl 2 years after 1st girl (no shower). Still got gifts, but the poor thing is stuck with hand-me-downs. She loves wearing things that once belonged to "big sister".

Relax, let it happen and have fun....

Hi B.,

I second the other 20 responses you've had - go for it, and don't worry. Anyone who thinks a 2nd shower is tacky clearly isn't living in the 21st century!

My two boys are almost exactly two years apart, and I sometimes feel bad that my little guy is using a visibly worn-out booster seat and clothes faded from so many washes. Most of our gear has held up, but even in two years, so much has changed in the design!

Take a good look at all your "old" baby stuff. If there are things that didn't work as well for you last time, now is your chance to look into different alternatives. You'll be amazed when you walk into Babies-R-Us or any other "baby" store! There are so many new safety features and updates in the past few years that you'll be thankful you registered for the new stuff.

If you really feel bad about it, take this opportunity to pass down some of the older "boy" things to a shelter, rescue mission, consignment shop, or even a church. There are always people in need!

Congrats, and enjoy your new little one!

of course, let your friend do the shower. It's a BABY shower, and you're expecting a NEW BABY. So, you need stuff for her too, and celebration, too.
If you feel awkward about going to do the registry - don't make it big ,pick what you really think you need. People might give you smth. they wish.
Good luck. And celebrate your baby and your motherhood.

For your situation it is totally fine! Register for essesntials. Enjoy the day!! Don't call it a shower, call it a "sprinkle"!!!!

Hi B.
I think you should go for it! I have two girls, three years apart, and my good friends (most of whom I met after baby no. one) threw me a second shower. As a matter of fact, the five of us, who all met because we had little girls born with-in six months of each other, were all pregnant together with our second set of girls all born with-in six months of each other! We threw showers for each and every baby!...all seconds!...all girls!...all 2-3 years apart!
If it is all close friends/family I don't see why anyone would think it is tackey. It has been 5 years! You need new stuff. A lot changes in the baby world in 5 years. Also, you have all boy stuff!
Congrats! Enjoy your new baby, and a second shower!

part of a baby shower is just the joy of celebrating -- let everyone enjoy together! Also, I found that I really did need many new things with our 2nd, or that new stuff came out in those years that is fun.

I totally agree with your friend. It's been 5 years and things have changed. If it's close friends and family then they would probably be buying you a gift anyhow, so why not make it a group thing! congrats and best of luck!

There is nothing wrong with a 2nd Shower - they actually consider it a "Sprinkle" and you children are so far apart...you deserve 1. So if your loving friend is willing to throw you a party...ENJOY it, your 2nd child is just as special as the 1st!!!!! Party Hard!!! :-)

Absolutely, celebrate your new baby. My girlfriend had her 3rd baby shower! Her mom threw it. Her kids are all 3 years apart. It was about the celebration, not the stuff.

I just had my 3rd baby and did not have a shower and I totally wish I had! My sweet little boy was not celebrated like his sisters were. No pictures, no memories.

Have fun and congrats.

Go ahead and have the shower. I had my third child a little over a year ago and I did have another shower. My first two children are only 2 years apart, so I was not in need of anything then, but with my third there was a 4 1/2 year gap. You will be surprised hw much has changed. I actually still had a carseat from my 7 1/2 year old and after checking it out I found that there was a label on the back stating not to use after December 2006. With a new baby you want wverything fresh and new looking. If I were you I would let your frient know that you ust want a small intimate shower. My second shower only included my sisters-in-law, close friends and a few close family members. We didn't go into the extended family and distant friends. it was nice and we had a lot of fun. Go for it! Pamper yourself and that new baby girl!!!!

I have had a 4th baby shower for a friend of mine(and her kids were only 2 years apart girls and boys).....who cares. I think people should have a shower for every child. Showers are not only about gifts, but about celebrating new life coming, getting tagather and having fun.

There have been second baby showers...small ones. I heard someone call it a sprinkle instead of a shower :)

Hi B., I think your friend is right. If she wants to make a shower, let her. You don't have to do a big registry thing, hopefully you still have some things for baby. You just need some new, pink or girly clothes. I hope your friends will want to celebrate your new baby girl. My best, Grandma Mary

I say go for it! Children are expensive enough, and if your friend WANTS to throw you a shower, who are you stop her? :) Don't worry about what other people think. If they don't agree or like the idea they don't have to go. Congrats on the future arrival on your baby girl! Live it up. 5 years apart....you absolutly do deserve a shower...

I had a shower, same situation. I have a daughter who at the time was 6 and I was pregnant for my son. A friend wanted to give me a shower and so did my mom because so much time had gone by.

I had both showers, but didn't register. Only invite close friends and they will know what you need. My mom told her friends to just do gift cards and that's what they did. It worked out great!

I also switched with friends (gave them my old girl items and they traded boy items). Why buy swings, etc.... when you can borrow them from friends and give them back. I did that too.

Did you ask her to do this or was it her idea? It sounds like it was her idea so relax and enjoy and let your friends and family enjoy spoiling you for a time!!! As for the registry GO FOR IT!!! It will be fun and make sure you put the big ticket items as well as small ones on so all differnt budgets can get ideas and not feel bad. Congratulations. My girls are 5 1/2 years apart and it is a whole new experience. A.

Go for it! Keep it simple, but she's right, you will need some girl items - like clothes and blankets. My neighbor also wanted to throw me a shower for my second child. My children are only 3 years apart, and they are both boys. I felt awkward at having a shower for the second child too. I ended up doing it, more or less, as a favor for my neighbor because she was really into this shower. It ended up being fun, and I got some new things for the new baby, which was also nice.

A friend of mine had a "sprinkle" instead of a shower. (Cute, huh?) She had a son after twins (one of each) 3 years ago. I don't believe she registered, and it was just her really close friends (not like the 30 or so that were at her first one). It was the first I'd heard of it, but it sounded like a good idea, particularly with a distance between the two pregnancies.

FYI....my friends threw me a second shower when i was pregnant with my son....my daughter and my son are also 5 years apart. I understand you friends point of view, 5 years is like 1st child all over again, i do not think it is tacky, in this economy everyone can use all the help they can get when you are expecting a new baby. Let your friends have their fun.


GO FOR IT! It is my personal belief that EVERY baby should be celebrated. It isn't just about getting things but celebrating this baby's soon arrival. I had one with my first and what I called a "sprinkle" (vs. a shower) with my second. With my third, we had moved out of state and so we never did anything and it has bugged me the entire first year my little guy has been born because I feel like his arrival wasn't celebrated.

I am getting ready to go home for a visit and I think my mom's great aunt is putting a little gathering together just to officially welcome him to the family. I hope so!!

Just say "thank you" to your friend and be happy you have such caring people in your life. Then celebrate that little girl! :)


Hi B.,
Congratulations! This is such an exciting time for you. I was given a baby shower for each of my children. However, when my first son was born I lived in Massachusetts. When my second son was born, I was here in New York. I have always thought that you only have one shower unless you are new to an area or to a church. My church in MA would always throw a shower for the first baby. But if you were having child number 2 or 3, ect... and new to church we'd throw one for you as well. We wanted to make sure everyone felt welcome.
All that being said...it's very sweet that your friends want to throw this shower for you. If they are insisting I'd go with the flow. Instead of registering though maybe you could just tell your best friend that a gift certificate to the store you are purchasing most items from would be nice. Then you wouldn't feel odd about registering. Feel blessed that you have friends who care about you and your new baby so much! Enjoy this moment :-)

Hi B.,
i just went through a similar situation. My daughter is almost 3 and I was expecting a boy and my mother in law wanted to throw me a small welcome baby shower. I felt uncomfortable about it and was unsure what to do. When I spoke to my friends about it they had said they were planning on doing a little lunch for me on their own and they would be buying the baby gifts anyway so I should make a small registry to get what I need. I ended up registering for the few things I needed and they had a small shower for me in my yard. It was beautiful and intimate and so nice to spend time w/ close friends and family and celebrate the upcoming arrival of my little boy. So I say go for it and celebrate the arrival of your daughter!!!!

Well I must be tacky if that is what they are calling it. I have a almost 4 year old and a almost 2 year old both boys and I had two showers. Actually I had three showers.

I didn't throw them so who am I to say No. I lived in Rochester for my first son and my moms best friend through me one there and my mom and a church lady through me one here in Ilion. For my second son we lived here in Ilion and my mom and the church through me another one. I think it might become tacky if you were throwing the shower for yourself.

EVERY BABY SHOULD BE CELEBRATED. We said either you can buy a gift or prepare a meal for the family for after the baby was born. Again I say that every baby should be celebrated. Why should the second, third, fourth baby have to settle for only hand me downs. They deserve new things also. Just my opinion.


Go for it! I find that people are so generous and want to share in your special time. Having a registry will make it easier for people to do so. A few years ago, I spearheaded a "second shower" for a friend who already had a boy but was having a girl. My friend was so appreciative and the girl stuff is just so cute. I understand where you are coming from but you and your daughter deserve to have nice, new things. Congrats.


Make a registry, people will want to buy gifts whether you have a shower or not.

And go for the shower! I had one for my first (boy) and one for my second (girl-6 years later). Did not have one for my 3rd, but did receive many gifts.

I think having a second shower is fine if a decent amount of time has passed between the two children, and 5 years is definitely a decent amount of time. An intimate baby shower is definitely appropriate, and re. the registry, have fun and go for it! If people don't want to buy you something, they won't. But if they do (and I'm sure they will!), having a registry just makes it easier for them. Especially for those who do not have babies!

I still cant believe that people are as rude as to say thats its tacky. Who's to decide whats tacky and whats not? Here's a thought....Dont Go!! Why express your opinion? I have three kids and had a shower for everyone of them. My first two were boy and girl five years apart. My last is a girl two years from my other daughter. My girlfriends from work planned and asked some family members if they wanted to go. Some did, some didnt. Its a choice. Let your loved ones throw you the shower or Sprinkles (i like that). If people dont want to go, they dont have too. It just stinks that there will always be that negative person with nothing nice to say. But you cant control that. Have a great time...

I believe you should, but I think you'll run into opposition - it's just 'culture' around here.

Every baby deserves a shower!

Everyone thinks after the first you have everything you need. Well, if everyone remembers correctly, 90% of what I have is A) Boy, B) hand-me-down or C) expired (like the car seat!)

I think if your close friends are close, they will understand what you have and don't have, and that while having a child is a choice you have already made, you still aren't related to Rockefeller (and in most cases, if you are, it doesn't make a bit of difference.)

A registry will truly, I think, make it easier for those friends - I never understood one and believed it was tacky and very wrong until a friend explained it to me. "I know you, but I don't live with you. I haven't been through your cabinets, drawers and pantry to know what you have and don't have - and I don't think your husband is about to let me! So register already, or I will get you the ugliest plate set I can find!" (well, it's cleaned up and paraphrased, but that's the gist of the situation 12.5 years ago.)

So, to save someone who has to get you the perfect gift (ie: the one you don't have and can most use and would best like) register.

Congratulations, Good Luck, and happy mothering!

Hi B., I also had a second child after 5 years. It was another girl. I had given up hope of having another child as we had been trying for 3 years. My family and close friends held a surprise shower for me at my mother's home. It was nice and I got new things for my new daughter. Some things which I have kept to give her daughter I hope one day. Enjoy the shower and this special time of having a new little one. You have lots to worry about, don't worry about this. B.

P.S. My daughters are 24 and 19.


I just attended a neighbor's 2nd child baby shower. It wasn't tacky in the slightest (she was having another girl, but the sister was 5 or 6 yrs older). EVERYONE loves shopping for baby stuff and seeing all the new little baby "garb" items they've come up with (in this instance you'll have to ask for the "little sister/big sister" items as well! Relax and enjoy. If anyone thinks it tacky, they need only attend and they will realize, hey, this is kind of fun. If only for a reason to party, have a great time and enjoy!

Every baby deserves a celebration. If you have a dear friend who wants to plan a party for you and your little princess to be, than sit back and enjoy!

Enjoy and if you have another celebrate again. Who decided only your first child should be celebrated? Don't invite them.

I have three children and only had one baby shower. Now, I wish I had a baby shower because I don't have anything to show my two younger children. A baby shower is a great way to save yourself money on diapers. lol

B., there's this saying that it takes village to raise a child. How blessed you are to have friends who realize that you have needs and that she knows your friends would be more than honored to help fulfill. Can you imagine your daughter sucking on a five year old binkie? And you know she'd be rocking in that newborn OSHKOSH short set with minature bow tie! Need I say more. There is nothing in any rule book that says you can't have a shower for every baby you have. Thank God for friends, be blessed and return worrying about all the other "little" things every pregnant Mom goes through. May the Lord Bless You and Keep You. May the Lord Make His Face Shine Upon You and Be Gracious To You; May The Lord Lift Up His Countenance Upon You and Bring You Peace and May the precious new present that He is about to bless you with come freely during birth without any difficulties. Be Blessed!


I don't know about the etiquette of it all, but personally I have never had a baby without people giving gifts, shower or not, and I had 4 babies. I had a family and friends baby shower with my first...then my husband's work and my work threw baby showers when we had our second...my family threw another baby shower when we had our 3rd...the first girl!..and then our new church threw a shower for my 4th. So I've never had a baby without a shower, but except for the 2nd one by family, it was different people every time coming to the showers.

I'm sure after 5 years there are things you need and people like to buy little girlie clothes. I wouldn't plan it myself, but if someone else feels like they want to throw one for you, why not?

Congratulations on your baby girl!


I say go for it and have fun...and go ahead and register too! It's not selfish to do that, it helps people to know what you need or would like for the baby.

Nothing tacky about it!

It's not like living with your partner for 5 years then having a bridal shower and a huge wedding... now that's tacky! lol

I has a second shower for my son and my daughter was 5 at the time too- the reason my family and friends gave me a shower though was b/c it was my first pregnancy and my 5 year old is my step daughter- there is nothing tacky about it at all- that just seems like the norm now

My first 3 were boys and then 2 girls. When i found out I was having a girl, my family was so ecstactic they couln't wait to plan a shower! I say it is a wonderful idea irregardless of how many you have.
5 years is a long time and you wouldn't believe the changes in baby products they have made. For one, Car seats- you'll be amazed! I think if I recall correctly, car seats should not be used after 7 years because of the safety changes that are made. Safety issues apply to so many things--exosaucers, high chairs, etc. it is always nice to have a fresh start especially when expecting the opposite of what you have. it is especially nice to receive all the girly stuff . many people do this and i see nothing wrong with it! Go ahead and enjoy it , you only have that baby once. As for the registery, definately compile one. it will help everyone tremendously. If people oppose to youhaving another , shower , they can choose to come or not!

GO FOR IT!! You deserve a baby shower....after 5 years and now a girl I think its fine....we gave my close friend a shower for her second daughter...her kids were 7 years apart and much had changed since the birth of her first...dont feel weird or torn...Again I think you deserve it!!

You know your closest friends, if you think they would be ok with it then go for it but keep it as simple as possible, keep the registry minimal and limited to major necessitites only (if you really need to do one at all) and let your friend communicate about any gift wishes. Then buy nice thank you gifts (not favors) for anyone who attends. It IS a special time and I think you do deserve something nice! I think its nice your friend wants to do this for you!

congratulations on your pregnancy, with a girl! definitely Do
it! first of all its a girl( not a boy) and its been 5yrs, but most important do we feel bad about celebrating our birthdays every year? and receiving gifts every year?? this is a new life and it deserves even more celebration!! congratulations again!!

I always learned a 2nd shower was tacky and when someone first threw a second baby shower for a pregnant mom - I thought - Really???

I've gotten over it!!! Have the shower - register! Get the things you want for this little one!! Besides - everyone is going to buy you something and it would be better to get the sheets and bouncy you want instead of 30 pink dresses that are all 0-3 months!!!

Congratulations on the little girl - especially after 5 yrs! But I think your friend is RIGHT! Celebrate this new baby and get all the cute new things for her - and feel PROUD that people want to do this for you and your baby girl and let the "awkward" go!! Have fun!

Maybe you could try something a little different and instead of calling it a shower call it a "Girl Party" or "Lets celebrate Babara's upcoming Princess" - and just don't say anything about gifts, if your friends talk they will figure out that some people are bringing gifts. Think of it as an excuse to get together and celebrate with you!

I think a second shower is totally fine. You're friends obviously don't think it's tacky since they want to throw it for you. 5 years AND defferent genders TOTALLY justifies it. Congratulations and enjoy!

I was talking to a co-worker about this the other day b/c one of my friends and I have girls who are 3 and then boys who are 18 months old and we believe it is tacky to have two showers that close and one of my old friends had a daughter who will be 3 in October and is having a boy in October and is having a shower I think it is a bit too much personally to have one that close but after 5 years you do deserve it. Go for it and have fun

I think you should let her throw the baby shower. My mother insisted on throwing me a small shower for my second child (less than 3 years apart). Everyone who was invited really wanted to be part of it and it was wonderful. It was much less stressful the second time and it gets the first child involved in the process.

Enjoy it and do not worry about what others say!!!

As a woman in her forties with no children ...
I would welcome one or two or three ...
and as a person who was a "menopause baby" myself ... after an entire family of "siblings" born a generation before me ...

I do not think those that truly love you would judge you on having a registry either ...
I believe in baby showers (or some type) for EACH pregnancy ... even if it were a third or fourth child ... a
"day" of celebration or even MOM papmpering and "celebrating" would be great - and need not always involve just diapers and stuff for the baby ...

I am working now with a lot of pregnant women (up to 200 per year) and at my agency (and with some midwives I work with) we believe it is a cultural shift we could all well use ...

so I say go for it! You are blessed to have a friend like that!


Glori Ani

ps. There is a way to tastefully present the sentiments your firend expressed (if you feel them too) and have people realize it is about the new life that is coming and that is a good enough reason to celebrate!

Good morning! Congratulations! My friend is actually is your same situation, so we are throwing her a "SPRINKLE." It's basically a small baby shower, but called a sprinkle because we don't expect the "big" things and only a few close friends are invited. EVERY baby needs to be celebrated...first or fifth! Your close friends and family would get you something even if you didn't have some kind of celebration, so this is just a way of having a get together. Register for smaller things, or request the necessities like diapers, bottles, clothes. I had my 2nd a year ago and they were 3 years apart, different sexes and the people at work had a small celebration for me and that is how I got a new stroller because everyone chipped in. If you need any other suggestions, ideas for games for the Sprinkle, let me know. I'm planning my friends right now!! Good luck with your new little girl!!

I have two kids and I had a shower for my second. I did not have one for the first because I lived away but my co-workers had one for me.

My first was a boy and second was a girl. So I understand and yes...have another shower. It's not tacky. It's fun. baby equipment changes and safety regulations usually get better so go ahead and enjoy this pregnancy...register!!!

Who cares what people think. Celebrate!

If you aren't asking for the shower then what's to worry. After 5 years and a baby girl on the way is something to celebrate. I wouldn't register but I would have your friend come up with a theme like Mommy's new princess or we need some pink essentials. Your close friends won't think it's tacky and besides it's not like you are asking for a new crib or big things like that. When my Aunt and Uncle had their second it was a 7 yr time span and she was having a boy so my family threw her a small shower with lunch and all that. Congratulations on your new arrival!!!

Do it!! Everyone you know is going to want to buy stuff for your newest addition anyway so you mind as well make it easy on them and register! No one will think it's tacky.. Your first was a boy, now if you had another boy, that could be a different story. Bottom line, it's family and friends you know and who love to help and want to shower you with cut little girly things to welcome that baby into your family..LET THEM!! :)
Good luck! Hope you enjoy everything that little girl will do to complete your family. It brings back memories of how my daughter was so excited to be a big sister and hold and help out with her little baby brother... it's so much fun!!
Jeez, almost makes me want to have another....

Each child is special and should be celebrated! My boys are 21 months apart and I had 2 showers. The first one was a big one and the 2nd was just close friends and some family members (much more intimate). When I eventually have a 3rd, I would want to celebrate that child too and have an intimate gathering.
Go for it!!!!!!!!

I say go for it and register as well. I don't see anything wrong with it. I think that rule is outdated. Frankly. I don't see anything wrong with having a shower for each child. I would keep the pictures as a part of their baby book. If I had more than one child the pictures would help me to have special memories about each pregnancy and child. Enjoy it and be grateful for friends who want to do this for you.

5 years difference, different genders... this is absolutely a situation that calls for a 2nd shower. And that's what it should be called, too. Consider that some of your gear (mainly your car seat) is too old to be reused. Also consider that what your son used may be too beat up to be considered safe - did he chew the rails on his crib? Did you use your playpen or stroller so much that they are now wobbly? You also said some items were ruined. This is actually where a registry DOES make a lot of sense. If all you need are new bottles and a new stroller, then your friends and relatives will see only those things on the registry. And maybe there are things you didn't have the first time (or weren't available) that you'd like for this baby - a sling or a hip hammock come to mind. I think most people today understand that each baby deserves at least a few new things. Unless your friends are ultra conservative and old-fashioned, they will definitely want to celebrate with you - so let them!

Hi B.,

Have a second shower, I did. I also had a 5 yr. old and was having a boy. I had a shower and it was great! Now, if I had anymore then no. But two different sex babies I would and I did. So don't feel so bad, you like myself probably don't even have most of the things given to you the first time around. I am sure you have good friend and family that will support you. Go for it, thats just my opinion. Good Luck! :)

Some people refer to a second small shower as a "Sprinkle" - I think this is fine for your friend to do. By calling it something different - a sprinkle (which clearly indicates it is smaller than a shower) - you don't make people feel like it is a big thing. I would keep it to very close friends and possibly make it into a pampering type of party with someone coming to do manicures and pedicures, etc. that way the focus is off of you part of the time. I don't think I would register either but rather tell the person throwing the party the types of things you need - it could even be possible that if it is all close friends that they buy all the gifts together. Good luck and enjoy this fun happening from your "close friends."

It's been 5 years and you have moved a few times so it would not be tacky to celebrate your new baby. But I would not call it a shower and it should be very relaxed. I would not register, that seems pretty tacky for a second child. Your friends will probably get you presents anyway as girl things are so much fun.

This is the nice things about showers - you are not asking for it so enjoy it.

Maybe you could sit down with your friend and come up with some ideas of things that you need for round two? This way you would not have to register and she could make suggestions, if asked. If there are very specific things that you need then you could register for those and leave a note on the registry indicating that these are the essentials lacking.

My only other thought is be prepared with your pen and thank notes.


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