C.R. asks from Derry, NH on March 04, 2008
Screamfest! (Colic Stories)
Hello, I was just wondering about other moms' experiences with colic. Our little girl is 7 months old now, and thankfully, she completely finished with colic around 3.5 months. She is now a generally very happy, sociable little girl, but definitely strong-willed. But oh- it was a such a horrendous experience! Not just the the several consecutive hours each day with the screaming, but also excessive crying all day! Now, I understand that babies can simply "fuss," instead of screaming like they are on fire, it was like she only had an on or off switch. My daughter is breastfed, and I found that completely eliminating dairy products from diet reduced the colic down to about half to a third of the severity. Recently, I saw a study showing that exposure to second hand smoke during pregnancy greatly increases the risk of infantile colic, which I was unfortunately exposed to at my workplace during the first half of my pregnancy. (It was a mixed-use building with tenants, and I was unable to completely solve this problem at the time.)
My questions are: if you have had a colicky child- did they become toddlers who are more irritable or high needs than your other children? Did you find that your colicky child had problems napping? Our girl just couldn't seem to stay asleep for more then a matter of minutes each time during the day- until the magical 3 month mark. Did you come across any techniques that signficantly worked for you?
I am a healthcare professional, and even through my research, and questioning my pediatrician, and my friends who are pediatricians and midwives- this is an area with surprisingly little useful info, and I know that it affects a lot of families. If you have some time to share your stories from this uncomfortable time, I'd love to hear!
Thanks
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M.W. answers from Bangor on March 05, 2008
Hi! I had twins with colic and my now 5yr old also had colic. The twins napped well, but my 5 yr old never did. None of them take naps anymore. The oldest stopped taking naps when he was a little over a year old. The twins took naps until they were about 2 1/2. I keep their room really dark and had a fan in there. I still have a fan in their room at night when they sleep.
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N.P. answers from Hartford on March 04, 2008
my son is now 15 but boy oh boy was he a collicky baby. i did find that because he was such a "screamer" myself and my family tended to swaddle him more and pick him up more. He became used to this and was a little more "spoiled" than usual. He was night and day compared to my daughter (had daughter when he was 18 months). he did not react well to me having another child because he was so close to me.
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J.D. answers from Providence on March 05, 2008
Did you read the "Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr Karp by any chance? Really interesting look at what causes colic and steps to comfort suffering babies.
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C. answers from Hartford on March 05, 2008
My son, now 4, cried for 12-14 hours a day during the 2nd to 6th months. It was to the point where his cries were hoarse & he would lose his voice. My pediatrician was no help - he taught us the colic hold & treated us like idiots. When he did pick up our sleeping son to show us this hold he got a sample of his screams & quickly rushed us out of the office. My son also had trouble breastfeeding at birth and had to be fed through a bottle. The lactation nurse had asked me if he hiccuped often in the womb, which was true, and remarked that I was in for lots of feeding troubles. I am not sure where she got that from, but she was right. Anyway, once the colic cleared, he rarely slept, he was easily irritated despite having a mostly happy demeanor, and a host of other odd behaviors were becoming more apparent. At the age of two he was diagnosed with autism & I now attribute many of his infant problems to sensory processing problems. The things that did help, on occassion, were: gripe water, low lights, showers in an infant carrier with dad, and car rides (for hours). I wish more doctors did take colic more seriously - I know that in Canada it is considered a medical condition & the governement provides an in-home nurse to relieve parents from the stress. I think my dismay is that not all colic is equal & shouldn't be treated as such. The stress it induced was almost unbearable & yet, despite its prevalence, there is very little help available or understanding of what colic is by the professional health community.
Perhaps you should considering putting together a book or your own research study.
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A.K. answers from Boston on March 05, 2008
Oh my I had a severely colic child. I feel like wonder woman since I have surprisingly survived. My son is 2 1/2 and very high maitenance. He started colic at 8 days old and stopped at about 13 mo. He screamed about 20 hours a day the first 11mo before it let up. He would scream so long and hard he would rupture blood vessels in his eyes and burst a vein in his foreheadthat has gotten lighter but will never go away. I took this child from NH to Boston and nobody seemed to help me. He'll grow out of it ...yeah ok..Now at 2 he is a needy little bugger. I have found with my own child as well as other MOC (mothers of colic) that I assume from being handled quite frequently it causes them to be very clingy. He can be very whiny and no patience. If things don't go the way he wants he has a meltdown.There appears to just be no nagotiating with him....ever....his way or screamfest. It appears the last few months it is getting better but he still has his days. I hope for your sanity it improves but I personally think it makes or a hig maitenance child....good luck :)
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R.K. answers from Boston on March 05, 2008
Hi.. My daughter, sho is now 22 mo, didn't have colic, per se... she had a gastrointestinal problem and allergies to soy and milk (both of which have gone away) that caused her to have screaming fits for the first 10 mo of her life. Her symptoms were so like colic that the doctors kept telling me she'd outgrow it when she was around 5 mo old... but when she didn't, we realized there must be another problem..
Anyway, she too is a very sociable and mostly happy baby, the one thing I feel she sort of inherited during her scream sessions was a strong (and i mean strong) will, and quite the little temper. She's a tough little cookie, but not out of control or hard to handle. She had a hard time when she didn't get her way or when i didn't hold her (I think she got so used to being cuddled when she was screaming, that she had a hard time letting it go).. but after only a day or two of firmess with her and putting her in the other room until she clamed down, she got the picture and now has control of her temper.
I wouldn't worry too much, i'm not even sure if her temper or firey spirit comes from genetics or all those months of screaming!! Either way, you'll both be fine =)
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C.B. answers from Boston on March 05, 2008
Hi C.,
I too had the pleasure of a severely colicy child. My son started at 1 month old until 6 months old. Non stop screaming, NO SLEEPING/NAPPING,and not a very happy mommy. The pediatrician we had (before we moved out of state) was fantastic! He was very kind & helpful during those 5 very very very long months. First we tried a few formula changes (i bottle fed) and Nutramagen was a LIFE SAVER! Huge improvement from then on out.
As a toddler, you know, people say 'terrible twos' but they're SO WRONG ... it's 'terrible threes'. LOL Although, my oldest went through a 'terrible 18 months' when his 2yr molars came in incredibly early. Otherwise, his toddler years were fantastic. We had so much fun together each & every day (with very rare napping) & he's a joy today.
He most definitely had problems napping - after awhile, the fight just wasn't worth it anymore. if he stayed up, then he stayed up. it was alot more work, but i wasn't ripping my hair out, getting frustrated or crying anymore. And he slept longer at bed time. which was far more important to me.
The only techniques that I can remember were late night car rides to help my oldest son fall to sleep. I'd put him in his car seat & go for a ride around my neighborhood until I was sure he was asleep. (I'd test & stop for a minute or so & if he started to wake up & start screaming then I kept driving). There were some nights I drove around from 2-3am, just around & around & around my block (thank goodness my neighbors knew our 'special' situation - LOL). But once i got him to sleep & was able to turn off the car & he was STILL sleeping, I'd take him in the house in his car seat & leave him in that to sleep. Doesn't sound so great - but if he fell asleep in it, he can stay sleeping in it. He's upright so no issues with SIDS & He had blankets on him & he did great. I also think the confinement of the buckles (being buckled in) almost like he's being held close by mommy, comforted him. I also had to play music on the car ride - that worked WONDERS. I think just the movement of the vehicle & the music together worked.
During the day, let's see ... he hated & I mean HATED his baby swing - but he LOVED LOVED LOVED his vibrating bouncy seat/chair thing. They have the ones w/the pads near the feet so when they kick the pads, music & lights start ... he didn't like that at all so I kept that part off, but he loved the vibrations. & although he didn't really fall asleep to it, it kept him from screaming all day.
Also, any educational cartoons (i'm not one for sticking your kid in front of a tv at all but this helped alot - i usually just sat with him most of the time to be with him & talk to him about the show) were extremely helpful. The few shows that worked for us were "Bear in the Big Blue House" I don't know if it was Bear's soothing voice or the brilliant colors or the great songs, but it worked! He also enjoyed "Stanley" (both on the disney channel) along with "Sesame Street".
I hope atleast some of this info was helpful for you. It's a hard road to travel but when it's all over, I think you'll find yourself even closer to your child than ever. Tyler (who was my colic child) is such a delightful little boy & so bright & loving & caring & we have so much fun together & we're already so close (we've spent every single day of his life together - once i had him i became a stay at home mom). He's now in Kindergarten & doing amazing. And I truly miss him all day & we're both so happy when i pick him up from school & we get to go have fun together at home & he tells me stories from school & we do homework & projects together. It's just so great.
When I had my 2nd son, boy was he different. He took frequent long naps, slept through the night like it was his job & he was a perfect infant ... then came the horns when he was almost 2 yrs old - not so much horns but more curious, then at 3 yrs old the horns came out in full view - i'm hoping by the time he turns 4 in august, he'll mellow out a bit - i truly think he's on his way there - but NOTHING I can't handle after having a colicy baby for 5 months ... LOL -but my youngest - he too is a joy & very close to his mommy =0) almost as much as his older brother if not equal & boy oh boy - these toddler years for him & I are another challenge .. which is another story for another day. =0)
Just remember it's only a phase & it WILL pass (if it hasn't already). But you are right - there's very little info about colic & it's tough. No doubt about it. They wanted my son in a clinic & I refused it (but that was just me).
Enjoy your little girl, I'm sure she's a little angel. Cherish every moment with her - being a mom is the most wonderful, rewarding, satisfying job in the world - and yes, even through the times when you're like "yea ok this lady is nuts!" - when it's all done with (the tough parts)& you watch her play & laugh & enjoy life's simple things, you'll forget all about the tough stuff - i promise.
Have a great day & God bless!
C. B.
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L.Z. answers from Boston on March 05, 2008
I am very interested in peoples' responses here because my 9-month old had colic as well, and I agree, it is NO laughing matter and not for the faint of heart. She started right at 3 weeks and didn't stop nightly crying until about 4.5 months. People told me it ended at 3 months, but that was a joke!! I am apprehensive as I write this because, unfortunately, I am finding that my baby has continued to be very high-maintanence, similar to what others here have described. On the plus side, she is very loving and affectionate, often giving me "hugs" and wanting to be held and cuddled. My oldest daughter was not like that so it's nice to have a cuddly baby. BUT, on the flip side, Emma is still the type of baby who doesn't want to be put down, even briefly. She is not a great sleeper and seems to need someone to rub her back or settle her back down if she wakes up in the middle of the night. In fact, she's now 9 months and I could count on two hands the number of nights she has slept "through" completely. I find myself sneaking past her sometimes when I get home from work because if she sees me she demands to be held immediately and I haven't even gotten my coat off!
I am not saying all this because I don't love being with my own child; of course I do and find it rewarding in so many ways. I just think there is a real connection between babies who had colic and their toddler personalities. I have a friend whose oldest was colicky and finds her to be a totally normal, adaptable, happy kid, so who knows? It's hard to know sometimes what is a stage a baby or child might be going through and what is a personality trait that might not go away. As parents we take the good with the bad and just go with what we have, hoping for the best!! Good luck and keep us posted!
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M.J. answers from Boston on March 05, 2008
Hi there, what a relief for you to have passed the 3.5 month mark. 3 months was the magic number for us too. My son that had colic turns 17 on Sunday!!! Time flies! We had no residual effects from the colic so I wouldn't worry about it. I really believe some infants need that extra time to fully mature their digestive track. It was challenging to have a baby that cried constantly. Since they pick up on your body language [tension etc..] my husband and I would take turns holding, rocking etc..but started to relax and find ways to have a conversation and laugh. There are times we are convinced that helped!
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D.D. answers from Providence on March 05, 2008
My daughter had colic. She is now 4 and was bottle fed. Try using Similac Alimentum (Spelling?) it saved our lives! Plus, we bought this "motor" that you attach to the bottom of the crib and it allows the baby to feel like they are in a moving car going 50 miles per hour. Sounds crazy- but it works! I read about it in "What to expect when you're expecting book" It is FDA approved and let her sleep all night and take 1-2 hour naps! She needed motion to sooth her. Her stomach wasn't developed enough to handle milk or soy products. Now, she has everything! By a year, she could tolerate all milk products and loves them! Good luck to you. I know how frustrating it can be when they scream and you can't calm them down. Plus, your tired and cranky too. It does pass- just hang in there. The nice weather is coming- take the baby out for walks during naptime. The fresh air will do you BOTH good!! :) D.
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J.P. answers from Burlington on March 07, 2008
hey i know what you mean! My husband and i are unable to have children of our own so we adpopted a baby he wasnt born yet when we got the call so we have had him sence birth. My son cried screamed for 4 - 6 hours at a time i was lucky i still have hair on my head. The doctor said he would grow out of it but didnt know how long it would take. I did alot of research also what we did was put him on soy formula it has all the stuff needed except that its not milk based. With in 4 days things calmed down greatly became a less cranky little guy. We left him on that until he was about 6 months old and we decided to switch him back to milk base gradualy and then on full time. I am glad that it all worked out. After that we started introducing other dairy products cheese, yougurt,cottage cheese ect. and he is able to handle them all. Now my son is 2 years old we are finding out that he get irrtable alot and can be a high needs child you need to have alot of patients. i have plenty my husband doenst have much so i tend to the attitude alot you just need to comunicate well get down on their level and ask them what they want and get them to tell you or show you what they want without a major breakdown. Yes its a challange but its worth the fight I love my son more than anything in the world and hope to adopt another child this year. Jenn
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