Rethinking Public School

Updated on April 28, 2011
E.B. asks from Tacoma, WA
14 answers

My oldest is going to private school for kindergarten right now. I went and picked up his registration packet at the public school he will be attending in the fall. I was a little taken back when the first page I read says...yes or no.....your child is a threat or can become harmful to himself or others?.....WTH! I have been outta the loop I guess. Has public school gotten that bad? I am seriously starting to get cold feet about letting him go. I had a home school plan picked out and I was convinced out of doing it. My mom teaches is my district. She is in middle school setting though. She has always said it is a rough district to teach in. I always thought it was just because she had older kids. I am not sure what I am really seeking right now . Whether it is to be talked out of jusmping off the cliff and homeschooling or to step back and just see how it goes with public school.

I want to add. I have nothing against public school for any grade. I went to the kindergarten they are attending, so it is a family thing. The school he is enrolling in is also the elementary school I went too as a kid.

I cant afford to continue to pay for private school for him.. I still have to get two more through their kindergarten program. I think it is the most important thing they start school strong. The kindergarten has them reading and doing math at a second grade level. So even if I do get them from first grade on, at home, they have had a good base grounded to kind of help me get a better start with them.

I am really just one confused mess about this. I am just happy I sort of started early. Talk it out with me please moms that have had these same thoughts

I want to add. I have nothing against public school for any grade. I went to the kindergarten they are attending, so it is a family thing. The school he is enrolling in is also the elementary school I went too as a kid.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I think it's most likely a general question so that the school is aware on any blatant issues to be aware of at the start of the year.
My public-schooled kindergartner was reading in K by mid-year.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Be flexible. My husband and I went to public schools for K-12. They were great! Before having kids I taught in a public school. We are pro-public school. When we moved to our current location (we are military), we enrolled my oldest in a Catholic preschool with the intention of moving him to the public school for kindergarten. After two amazing years of preschool, we decided to keep him at the school for kinder (school is preK-8). He will stay there until we move and my middle son will start preK in the fall. When we do move, we will consider public and private school options. I also believe that just because you're paying for it doesn't mean it is always better. So, stay flexible. Take a tour of the school, meet with the principal, and ask questions.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

Schools are being forced to do everything possible to avoid legal and other risks. This sounds like another thing they can point at to prove that they are doing everything possible to minimize risk to students in the case of a law suit in the future.

On the other hand, public schools are required to take all children, and have to be prepared to deal with behavioral and other types of issues. If I were in charge of a school, I'd want to know as much about the children as possible, to be prepared.

In the end, how you educate your children is your choice. My daughter is in public school, in one of the better districts in our city. She also attends the elementary school that provides education for the special needs children in the area. She is learning from this experience, also. I want my child to have a good education, but I also want her to grow into an adult who can deal with the real world. The real world does not exist in my home.

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A.H.

answers from Chicago on

I don't really like what I'm hearing about your district, and you should trust your instincts. Likely though the question they asked has become standard due to the number of violent incidents reported in schools, including the bullying issue. Why not give homeschooling a try - if it's really what's in your heart to do, don't let someone else decide that for you. It's your child!

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C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

See if you can get a tour of the school, during school hours and possibly sit in a classroom. Do you know any parents that send their kid there? If you can talk to a parent you can get an idea.

It's tough when you're looking for the right school for your child. Good luck!

My son goes to a Charter School (which is a public school) and it is K-8. I was a little worried and was able to talk to a parent about the school and talked to the staff there. It is a great school and I'm glad I did some research and my son is doing well. He's in first grade right now.

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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

I can't speak for that particular school, but generally speaking, no, it's not that bad, they just have to cover their tracks.

Don't overthink it or put yourself in a financial bind for his education. He can get a perfectly fine education at a public school.

If the school has a bad reputation for some (legitimate) reason, check to see if there are any charter schools in your area.

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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

I loved Stephanie F.'s advice (and we homeschool)!

I would also attend a homeschool support group meeting or two in your area to get a feel for the local homeschool community and the available activities (if that's something you are seriously considering).

Good luck no matter what you decide to do.

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C.M.

answers from Chicago on

I definitely agree with checking out all angles before making a decision. Some kids do well in public schools, some don't. Some love homeschooling, some don't. Why not do as one suggested and tour the school while it's in session and observe for yourself? Also, look for local homeschooling groups and talk with them. Sometimes our homeschooling group gets new members who are just thinking about homeschooling. They join for the summer, go on outings and talk with all the members. It's a great way to decide which one is the best for your family.

As for the mom with the "pointed" comment about the "real world" not existing in her home...LOL! Public school is hardly the "real world." Most homeschool kids get MORE "real world" experience than public schooled kids who spend all day SITTING in a classroom with kids their own age. Home schoolers do not spend all day sitting in their homes! Quite the opposite! We want to learn about trees--we go to the park and see them and make leaf collections. We want to learn about bees--we go to a bee keeper and see the bees for ourselves. We want to learn about animals--we go to the zoo and go inside the kangaroo enclosure and see kangaroos up close. The entire real world is our classroom. We've been to farms, zoos, museums, arboretums, gardens, bee keepers, parks, lakes, mountains, theater, valleys, cities, rural areas, poor communities, rich communities and we've met and interacted with people of ALL ages. My daughter will help the younger kids in her group, learn from the older kids, converse with adults and help care for the babies. If that isn't "real world" experience, I don't know what is.

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W.C.

answers from Seattle on

Go and observe the class(es) he might attend and talk to the teachers. Then make up your mind.

What I did and I think it was a really good choice for my kids, was keep them in private school until 4th and 6th grade. I would have kept the younger one in longer, but I had a divorce and money issues changed. It was good because the classes were small and they got lots of independent and personal attention. My kids were different learners and different personalites! They were not home school kids at that time. When they entered public school they were strong independent people and could ignore what was bad in public school and benefit from what was good. They were well liked by all their teachers and did very well in school.

So I think I made the right choice.

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

We considered homeschooling (briefly... we'd always intended to HS starting in middleschool) after preK, but went ahead with our public K.

Like yours... the phenom program had our son LOVING school, working at 2nd/3rd grade level... and then he went into K... and turned into a different child. GREAT teacher, decent school, bored and miserable. After a few months he HATED school. His mind 'turned off'. Not every kid gets to answer questions (or ask) so he immediately started jumping to whatever the "quick" answer was and waiting to be told what to do.. instead of long answers, questions leading to more questions, getting excited about what he was learning. He's super social... so every day (from a few months in) he'd wave to his friends on the bus, climb into the car, and cry the whole way home and sometimes longer. It's one of my biggest regrets I didn't pull him out then, but waited for the school year to end. The damage done to him took MONTHS (more than 6) to erase *most* of it. He was absolutely UNwilling to look at anything that resemembled school work, had shut down mentally and emotionally... but kept putting on the happy face for his friends.

His teacher (30yr veteran) was my biggest supporter in either homeschooling or getting him into a gifted or montessori school (somewhere he could relearn how to ask questions, think creatively/critically, find joy in learning again). The school itself just wanted to jump my 5yo into 3rd grade (when most in 3rd aren't 8/9 but 9/10, because in our district most parents start their kids in K at 6). Talk about social suicide. We couldn't afford the private schools, so we pulled him home 3 years ago.

The first 6mo were HARD. Deschooling, in our case, turned out to be absolutely necessary. At the end of our 3rd year now... HS'ing is absolutely amazing. But I still kick myself over the decision to keep him in K. I was nervous about sending him... but I didn't do enough research. The schools here don't publish their scope and sequence... or I'd have known how bored he'd be for the next several years (letter recognition in K, and counting to 20... beginning reading in 1st/2nd... math not introduced to grade 3 and he was already doing +-x/ and some fractions).

Go to the school. Schools change a lot in 5 years, much less 20-30 years. Watch the students, and teachers, GET the scope and sequence.

Homeschooling isn't for everyone, and neither is Awayschooling. Get an idea of how your child(ren) will be for the next few years. For us, we should have stayed home after preschool, for others, they get a great elementary education. It's a case by case basis.

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A.R.

answers from Yakima on

I love homeschooling, if you think it's right for your family, go with your maternal instinct! I found our curriculum online, pulling from many different (free) resources.

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C.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I just wanted to say that we homeschool and it has been awesome! It's so nice to not have to worry about them being bullied or whether they are learning or not (because we are their teachers and we know exactly how they are doing). If you decide to do it, it's a great option and can be a lot cheaper than private school.

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J.N.

answers from Portland on

I dont have any kind of answer for you because I am in a similar situation and have been planning on pulling my child out of public school and doing the connections academy with him at home but no one is supporting me on that issue. good luck with your choices.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I would talk to them and ask them why they have that question. I would also look at the overall district and see if there are any other schools or programs within schools that might fit him better than another.

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