L.M. asks from Dayton, OH on November 15, 2007
Red Flags Everywhere!!!
My son has a new friend.(girl) They are 5 and 4 years old, respectively. Today, my son informed me that, during today's playdate, his friend told him that "somebody's been licking her vagina" that's right, ladies, this is a big deal.
I called the mother of the little girl, and when I broke the news to her (expecting her to come unglued, as I certainly would) she said that she "wasn't concerned" and that she often "makes things up". this little girl obviously A)has heard of this in adult conversation B)actually is being abused or C)is watching adult films, which molesters often do with their victims before they make a move
I don't know the mom well, we have only had 2 playdates. but, would you assume maybe she knows of something going on and is trying to hide it? is she just in denial? am i overreacting? i'm just not sure weather to keep on her about talking with her daughter or to go straight to the authorities. I'm really stressing here, and I need some feedback.
2 moms found this helpful
B.F. answers from Toledo on January 11, 2008
Is there an update??? This is truely a scary situation and i agree with all the responses that say CALL...
M.R. answers from Cincinnati on November 16, 2007
Absolutely, positively do not let your children have any more play dates with this family until you are 100% certain the mother has addressed this with the proper authorities. While young children can be imaginative and make things up, it is usually harmless things like imitating when they see mommy and daddy kiss, etc. The words you used are most definitely a red flag.
I don't know where you live, but in Cincinnati you can call 421-kids (or is it 241-kids?), the police, or child protective services (<name of county> childrens' services).
If you feel like you might be starting trouble over the girls' comments, don't. I bet you would rather have this be a true misunderstanding than to let something serious and dangerous go.
Go to the authorities; she's obviously in denial. Be the voice that this little girl needs.
1 mom found this helpful
S. answers from Lexington on November 16, 2007
I agree with everyone else. Without a doubt, this needs to be reported to social services/police. That sounds a little too detailed for a 4 year old.
K.R. answers from Youngstown on November 16, 2007
Just wanted to chime in to back up the rest of the ladies so far. Better safe than sorry- kids do make things up sometimes but usually not that kind of thing. If it turns out to be nothing than great and if it is something else terrible than you may save this little girl from a lifetime of pain and problems. Also since the mother is not a lifelong friend or someone you know well than if you loose the friendship over it it isn't going to be a huge loss. Good luck- good for you for not sweeping it under the rug- alot of times good people look the other way when it comes to situations that are uncomfortable.
S.Z. answers from Cleveland on November 16, 2007
I would call social services NOW! If they dont have an emergency number for the public to call at least talk to a police officer, they would know who to call. Also an authority figure would know about it. That way IF something is happening or did happen over the weekend you would not always be thinking "I should have called or done something!" I cant believe the mom wasnt shocked! I would be HORRIFIED! It does sound like she is exposed to things that a 4 or 5 y/o shouldnt be exposed to. Even if its just hearing her parents talk about it, that should never happen!
God bless you!
H.H. answers from Cleveland on November 16, 2007
I would have to agree with all of the other ladies here. She seems a bit young to make a statement like that. Just to be on the safe side I would report it and let them take it from there. Goodluck to you and know you're doing the right thing.
L.K. answers from Cleveland on November 19, 2007
CALL, CALL, CALL! It's the only thing to do!!
B.R. answers from Columbus on November 16, 2007
You must report it and let the authorities handle it from there. I wouldn't have play dates with them anymore.
L.S. answers from Louisville on November 16, 2007
First of all, you are not over reacting! This is a very serious matter. I was molested by my own dad from the time I was 7 to the age of 12 when someone reported it to the authorities finally! It can really mess up a childs' mild! It should be investigated as soon as possible, in case there is something going on (as I believe there probably is). That way hopefully there won't be too much damage done to her mentally or physically (female problems).