Reading Resistance

You are such a loving mother! I have to admit, I haven't read the other advice you received but I thought I'd offer some fun games. If you make note cards with some letters (ex. f, r, i, e, n, d, s) on them (one letter per notecard, then have your daughter swirl them around then put them together to make as many words as possible. See if she can create patterns with letter combinations. (end, send, bend, lend, trend - obviously I didn't use the letters I provided above but you get the jist.) You should change up the letters and catch on to patterns and point them out - "wow - I notice you have made the word cat... is there another word you can make with the remaining h or m or p or s? You are doing great! This game is super fun and the kids don't realize the connections their brains are making. I like teh visual it creates too. First grade though... I don't know how much they should know. I'm a middle school counselor so I really only know that level. I can't imagine that your daughter wouldn't like that word game though! Also, they have "get ready for first grade" work books that may have some fun reading exercises in them. Practice practice practice. I often reccommend that the tv families turn on their closed captioning. See if she can read Dora's lines for her! Good luck!

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The most holistic, child-centered perspectives of learning advise that formal reading instruction begin around 8 years old. But we're obsessive (and driven by U.S. ed. policy that does not reflect how children learn & develop) so we push way earlier than many children are ready for. Reading is not sounding out words--it is gathering meaning. Please don't push your daughter or force her to read stupid, phonetic stories that are meaningless: "the cat sat on the mat" etc. Keep fostering that love of reading--it's critical. Read good stories together and instead of asking your daughter to "sound it out", ask her "what word would make sense." That will go much farther in her reading life. Defend her to her teacher that she has plenty of time still to be learning to read. Do not have her evaluated. Please.

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I have a lot of experience with this. First off, get her vision checked. Regardless of the outcome of that exam, I strongly reccomend that you have her evaluated for learning disabilites.

If money is not an issue have it done private. Due to frivilous law suits many of the school districts are not permitted to so some crucial diagnostic tests, so you're left without a full picture of your childs profile, and how best to teach her. If you live near the San Fernando Valley try Dr. Teri Solochek in Woodland Hills, or Dr. Chris Fulton at ###-###-####.

If you go through your school, you need to give them a written request for your child to have full educational testing for learning disabilities/gifted. This is a good time to go in and request it, remember the schools are open, even if there are no kids in them yet! After your written request the school has 60 days to complete the testing. Depending on the outcome of the testing there are several options. During this time I'd become an "expert" on the obligations that the schools have to kids with learning disabilites, and, if necessary, be prepared to fight for them. In this age of diminishing dollars the schools are loathe to provide services.

It is crucial that you become your childs advocate, this is not a "stage" that they outgrow, and the damage that can be done to their sense of self is huge. Find things she's good at, and really build it up. Remind her that not all kids walk, talk etc at the same time and that she will learn how to read. She's not bored, she's freaked out that the other kids can do something she can't. Good luck

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YES! We are absolutely asking our kids to do way too much before they are ready. In most European countries, kids don't even start school until they are 7. We are such nuts in this country about having the best of everything, and that applies to our children, too. Just listen to the way some parents respond to the questions posted here. It's crazy! Parents who take pride in having all their kids potty trained by the age of two, and other such nonsense. So many people seem to think that sooner equals better. I completely disagree. Learning to read early is not a sign of intelligence. I am an avid reader and have been since childhood. But I did not have an easy time learning to read. It wasn't until about the 3rd grade when it all just clicked into place in my brain and became easy. After that point it became my favorite thing to do. Before that point it was a constant struggle. And lets face it, your daughter is right, books are boring in the early stages of reading. I recall my mom stressing out about it, making me practice all the time, and I absolutely hated it. She wanted me to have a reading tutor and get evaluated and the whole 9 yards. My dad finally convinced her to lighten up, and thank goodness he did, I might have missed out on being a lifetime book lover. My youngest son was the same way. Just not into reading, and a bit behind his classmates in that area in K and 1st grade. Just this past year, in 2nd grade, that started to change, and this summer he is reading everything under the sun. Personally, I would much rather have a child who was slow to catch on to reading if it payed off with a lifetime love of reading. Stop focusing on it, and let your daughter develop this skill at her own pace. You will be glad you did. She is a fantastic kid, isn't she? Smart and adorable? Allow her to be an individual in her learning style and before you know it, you'll be telling her to put that book down and go play! :0)

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Both my daughters were similar, although they read well in K and first grade, they only read the minimum of what they needed to for school. They are now teens and still only read the minimum - they are not avid readers at all. BUT - I used to stress about that all the time, then I realized, they are straight A students and I'm stressing that they are not avid readers. They have other interests and great imaginations, and they get good grades, so I stopped stressing about it. This may not apply to you now, but in the future when she gets bored with reading, as my daughters still do, it's OKAY.

Don't worry, she's doing WELL with comprehension, that's the important part! She's young still and YES CA pushes our kids so early. Developmentaly MANY kids eyes & brains are just not ready yet. She'll get it no problem in about 6m. Keep reading to her. Don't correct her too much when she reads to you. Label EVERYTHING around your house.

Hi,
I was a Special Education teacher for many years and then switched to Kindergarten. I can tell you that I saw this many times. First, I would like to tell you to relax this summer and enjoy reading with her and to her. Next, when she is in 1st grade, if there is a problem, more than likely the teacher will pick up on it and tell you. It may turn out that she has a learning disabiity. I found that in my class my LD "Learning Disabled" children were some of my brightest and most articulate students, but just had a problem in one area, usually math or reading. If the learning disability is in reading it will carry over into every other subject, so it will need to be addressed right away. There are some wonderful tools that may be used to help her cope with the problem (that she may grow out of). I have used different colors of celophane over to words, this makes it clearer for some children. You will have to do tests to find out which color works best for your daughter. Also, she may have to be taught "whole word" approach, if h er sounding out skills are where the difficulties lie. Lastly,what I am trying to say is that it is nothing to be afraid of, you have a beautiful, bright child with many skills, and if she should need extra help in a certain area don't hesitate to help her to be all that she can be. I have had parents who didn't want their child in "Special Education", but I always told them that their child was very "Special" to me and I wanted the best for them just like they did and this was the way to do it. Good luck to you and enjoy every precious moment you have with your daughter because they grow up so fast. My is now 27 years old and I wonder where the time went!

It wouldn't hurt to have her evaluated just to rule out any processing challenges that would make it difficult for her to read. Identifying something like that early would help her immensely as she could get the appropriate help to learn to read as well as eliminate any self esteem issues she might have with having difficulty reading.
Some schools of thought say children shouldn't be taught to read before 7 as that is when their minds are better able to handle it.
Pushing a child to do anything often results in resistance and resentment. Let it go. Take her cues and if she is trying to read a word you can give her positive reinforcement, but don't force her to read.

kids at this age still have trouble with word recognition sometimes because they can't yet differentiate from letters like "d" and "b" (mirror-type flip) "p" and "q". I would advise that you keep with the letters and sounds, but don't push the words too hard yet, the mirror thing usually goes away by around 7. If she is still struggling after that, I would get some evaluation. Always keep it fun!

I don't have experience with this from raising children, but recal my own reading disability. I'm not saying your daughter has one. I was told I had a reading disability in first and second grade. I did have problems with both word recognition and comprehension. My parents did some of the things the teachers recommend, but mostly, I just grew out of it. I was an A, B student and consistantly tested 89th percentile in standardized tests. But I hated reading and I hated beeing made to feel like there was something intrinsically wrong with me. But it did drive me to try very hard. The problem was, trying harder didn't help much. I simply needed to grow out of it. I didn't learn to enjoy reading until I finally got my hands on books that were entertaining in about 4th or 5th grade. To this day I am a slow reader, but I graduated from collage and I read a lot more that most of my friends.
I'm inclined to think that we are expecting more of our children before they are ready. I wish I had words of wisdom for you. I only have my experience and don't have strong feelings about how you should handle it. My mother continued to be an avid reader herself and read to us kids. These things taught me that I too, in time, would be able to enjoy reading.

Call your daughters school and make an appointment to check for learning disabilities. It sounds like it might be a struggle for her to read. With dyslexia, a person may have to work very hard to decipher writing. Before she feels like a failure for not reading well, have her tested.

My daughter went thru something similar.Like you I did see and heard her difficulties reading. But it wasn't til our first parent/teacher conference that the teacher showed concern about the very same thing I picked up on. She set the wheels in motion and she was assessed by 4 professionals thru the school system. Overall it was a good learning experience for me and what I will need to continue doing for her thru out her academic carrer. Good Luck.

I would suggest you look into three things. Definitely what everyone has suggested about getting her vision tested, both whether she is seeing what she is reading well, and for the processing. Also, if she is in public school, you can get her tested for a disability like a processing disability or dyslexia. It's easier and much cheaper to do it at school, although if you really want to get it done, it can be done privately. Third, it could be that the books she reads are boring to her. you could hold out the carrot of finding a more interesting book as long as she is capable of reading a beginning book. However, from experience and judging from what you are saying, it sounds more like one of the first two since she is having difficulties with word recognition. The earlier you figure out the problem, the better for your daughter's self esteem. Good luck!

HI there-
Wow a lot of people are in the boat with us!! My 6 1/2 year old entering 1st grade also resisted reading. We paid for a few sessions at Sylvan and she is on her way. For her it was a confidence issue, she didn't want to appear wrong in front of her friends. I told her the same thing about learning to walk and ride her bike, I even showed her some of her old work and how she has progressed with writing her name (that really hit home for her!!)

Here is a couple of cute game ideas that helped:

Play I Spy with the sight words and non-sense words. Put the words on index cards and start with 10 on the floor/table face up in front of you both and play I Spy. She'll have fun reading them and will instantly feel success when she wins against a grown up.

Drive by Reading. Place 5 easy reading books in different locations in your house. When she walks past one it's "Drive By Reading Time"! Stop what your doing and rad the book together. She;ll enjoy the extra time with you and see the importance of reading because you dropped what you were doing to read with her.

One thing Sylvan does that my daughter loved was they give tokens for effort. There was no set # of tokens given for anything, just a few here and there. Then the tokens were added up and used to shop at the store. We are done with Sylvan for now, but I have started the token system for reading and doing learning work here at home. I have a few random things I have purchased over the years I am using to stock my store, but ultimately she is saving for a new baby doll. (so I don't need to have much of anything in the store) The big thing she wanted at Sylvan was 425 tokens so that will be how many she needs to get the baby doll.

One last thought, as for her not wanting to read boring books, make a trade of some tokens and a more exciting story read by you for the boring book she reads. Tell her that the boing book is just for practice just like when she was practicing writing her name.

Good luck!!! This parenting job is tough! :)

Yes, we are asking for too much, but unfortunately those are the standards and we have to try to reach them.
My recommendation as a former first grade teacher, is read to her and let her read to you. When you or your husband read to hear, read simple books and struggle with words here and there. Sound them out so she can see how you figure it out. Sometimes, some kids need to see how others figure it out. Read to her slow, not super slow, but slower than you normally will. Also, let her check out books in the library that are at her reading level and below. She needs to feel confident and let her read easy books if you have to, and help her work towards more challenging one. Yes, let her do this for one or two months and help her take the step to more challenging ones. Do it, even if she resists you.
If she has older siblings they can help her to, by reading and listening to her read. However, if they are making or going to make fun of her then don't allow them to read or hear her read. I know it sounds corny, but you can also have family reading time once a week. everyone takes turns reading a book kinda deal- it'll be funny and fun for her.
Be patient and read to her, I recommended for my parents to read to their students with these problems for ten minutes a day and the student reads the other ten. You will get the twenty minutes of reading in a day. You also don't have to get them all at the same time. You can break her time by two five minutes sessions- that way it does not feel long to her. remember when she reads- the time she is doing it will feel like an eternity because she dislikes it.
good luck.
ceci

Do you know how she's doing compared to other kids her age? Volunteering in her class or talking to her teacher can help you figure this out. Maybe she is doing fine for her age. If she's noticeably lagging behind others her age, have her evaluated. My daughter had a very similar problem, and I waited another two years to have her evaluated, which I very much regret. My daughter is incredibly bright, but had a specific learning disorder in regards to reading. If you go this route, address a formal letter to her principal requesting an evaluation for an IEP (Individual Education Plan.) These words will kick in a a process which is the right of learning disabled kids under federal law. If it comes back that she needs specific help, she will be able to get it. If it comes back normal, your worries will be soothed. My daughter got the help she needed and is now fulfilling her potential as an intermediate school student with straight A's. Good luck.

You have to use your best judgment and if you feel something is wrong-get her looked at.
In the mean time you can get Hooked on Phonics and make a game with it as I did with my kids. Or get her into Sylvin for a 30 min reading tutor-they know how to make things fun. I would have done that with my kids had it been around. My daughter started reading well in third grade and my son in second. Hooked on Phonics really helped- some kids learn better phonetically(whatever works).
My kids are now 21 and 17 and the 17 yr old boy was in GATE so being a little slower to pick up reading did not hurt him. My 21 yr old went to college so the slow start did not seem to hurt either of them.
BUT if you think there is a problem get her looked at- early intervention is the best medicine. Ask her Kindergarten teacher, or have a teacher read with her if that is your only option.

If she is bored then try to make it fun with rythms. How many words can she make with stop or tree. There is a cartoon also on called Word Girl that my six year old loves. Also take her to the bookstore and let her pick out some books she wants even if they are above her. Like level two. She may just need a challenge. Do crosswords that she has locate the words. She will get it. Check with her teacher to see if she is being bothered in class. Also check her eye sight.
Above all fun,fun,fun,fun. Do not show dissappointment. Keep the games short and maybe she will want more. She will get it.

I agree with Erica H. Please have her vision tested by a Developmental Ophthalmologist. If she is tested by a regular Optometrist then they may tell you her vision is 20/20, however they usually don't test how she's processing what she's seeing. I have seen some "miracles" with students after visiting the right doctor. It may require a few visits so that they give your child exercises for her eyes to improve in the area that is weak. I would encourage you to do it as soon as possible. Too many children struggle in school which leads to low-self esteem, when it could be "repaired" simply by a visit to the doctor.

You just described my son exactly. He just finished 1st grade and will be starting 2nd grade at the end of summer. He turned 7 last Feb.
I would not worry about it, just keep doing what you're doing. Read to her, give her the chance to read what she wants to when she wants to and praise her for the effort even if it is 2 words in an entire book.
My son is home schooled but we are in a program through the school district and have a supervising teacher we report to who provides state required lesson plans and text books. I am learning that my standards of achievement are actually higher than what's expected by the state and when he's getting tested for report cards he's coming up at grade or above in 99% of his subjects. His reading is not quite at grade but it made a vast improvement from the beginning of the year to the end of the year and is extremely close, the teacher was comfortable enough with it to advance him to the next grade and knows we continue to school even when we don't have lesson plans in front of us. He's advanced during the summer between K and 1st grade as well. Reading has always been his weakest subject and we have learned to back off the pressure and find ways to make it fun and a game for him. In my opinion I do think we tend to ask too much of kids before they are ready-I know I have been guilty of it. Sometimes it's been a good thing, my son needs that challenge in math or science or he gets bored because it's much too easy for him but I'm expecting too much in some of the language arts-more than the state even required to be considered at grade-and I'm backing off some.
My son is also benefiting greatly with the Leapster. There was a time when I was totally against those things. I found them noisy and annoying, I still find a good deal of their pre-school toys to fit in that category to be honest. But the Leapster games have been wonderful at exposing him to the skills he needs to learn at his own pace while having fun.
As a side note, I also have a 4 1/2 year old son who's already much more advanced in writing and such than my oldest ever was at this age, despite being exposed to it. Some children are just better at some things than others. This is why I don't like the traditional classroom learning system. It gives no room for individual children to get the extra help where they need it and the extra challenges when something is too easy.
She'll get it so long as you keep working with her just like you already are.
Sorry this got a little long. ::blush::

Get some flash cards, make it a game while in the car or while she is eating before going to bed, for every ten of the cards she recalls and can read give her a treat, like a sticker.. a sucker.. something she can work at getting, then sit down at bed time and write your own bed time story, draw it out for two weeks the story, when your finished read it to her then let her read it to you , after your done go to
www.lulu.com and have the story published in a book for her its really cheap in doing so.

I used to tell my daughter a story I made up called
The Gumdrop Fairy.

I ended up publishing the story...

Memories """

You may want to have her tested for dyslexia. My fiancee is dyslexic and he went through this at your daughter's age. Dyslexics are highly intelligent and actually have a gift as they can turn objects around in their minds and see how things fit together. The problem is that they turn the letters they see around in their heads too, but they can be taught how to hold the letters still, so they can read them.

Vision therapy is helpful for this. They help work on primitive eye reflexes and provide exercises to do at home as well. If you are in the San Diego area, Dr. Dana Dean is in Old Town. She is great with kids and does regular vision testing as well as functional vision testing. If she feels your child needs therapy, she will design a program for her. They also have all the codes for insurance, so you can check with your insurance provider before hand to see if it's covered.

Hi Movie mama:
I started both my Grandchildren out with phonic games,on my pc. They found them fun,and challenging.They also felt pretty proud of the fact they were learning to use the computer.They would master one, program,then wanted something a little more difficult. They went from the very basic and moved forward.By the time,they were in second grade,their vocabulary,and interest in reading was very encouraging. Now in their early teens,they're excellent readers,not to mention, far more knowledgeable on the pc than I am.The best to you and your darlin daughter

I have a 6 1/2 year old son also going into 1st grade. Reading has been quite the topic amongst my friends and family. I have come to 2 conclussions. 1. My son takes direction from other people BUT NOT ME!!! 2. Many differant teachers have repeatedly told me over the last 2 years that by 3rd grade the kids skills even out.
My sister was having similar sounding issues with her 7 year old and 5 year old. She ended up sending them to a tutor this summer and they loved it. They came out happy and looking forward to the next session. She still reads with them everyday but the pressure is off and there is a lot less arguing. My son also has a couple of the same words he just doesn't seem to remember. (Makes me crazy!!)I have tried to incorporate reading, sight words and spelling into lots of other aspects of his world in order to relieve the pressure of reading together. The alphabet game in the car has been great!
I truly believe that taking a step back, deep breathes and patience is key. It sounds like you are an awesome mom and your daughter is ahead of the curve in reading. School is staring soon, I would wait and see what her teachers think and then go with your gut.

I had the same problem with my son (who will be starting the fifth grade in three weeks). I teach high school, so I know exactly how important good reading skills are; my students who fail are usually the ones who struggle as readers!

I was amazed at what worked for us. First, I had to not got frustrated with my "scary smart" son struggling with a first grade primer (I think that was the hardest part <wink>). Second, I decided to take him back to the very basics of reading and I got a "Dick and Jane" reader. Hey! It worked for must of us in school, right?

This "Dick and Jane" reader was about 75 pages book (a compilation of D&J stories) and by the end of the book he had picked up on the word recognition and sound recognition and how it helps with reading. His confidence started to grow.

I slowly started getting him to read, out loud, progressively harder, but still not quite first grade, readers, like Dr. Suess which is great for repetitive words and word sounds. Plus, I would read out loud to him, so he could hear words in action.

Well, it took three years of this but by the time he hit the middle of his 4th grade year, he was reading like a maniac and devouring everything in sight. Your daughter could be a late bloomer, too.

The boredom issue played a big role with my son as well. What saved us is the mantra of the reading skills teacher at the high school where I work: "If you don't like reading, you haven't found the right book!" Perhaps letting your daughter know that she won't be able to read the good stuff until she can master the boring stuff at school would keep things in perspective.

Last but not least, if don't already do it, read for fun in front of and with your daughter. Kids won't see the value in reading unless they see their parents doing it. In my house, we call them "read fests" and they're extra special time with mom.

Good luck!

It sounds to me like she is a bit of a perfectionist and, being one myself, we don't like to do things that we aren't sure we can do perfectly. Try reassuring her that just like we didn't know how to talk or walk when we were born, that we aren't born knowing how to read and look how well she's done with those tasks! Instead of having her read books, try putting words around the house, i.e., door on the door, oven on the oven. Of course make them as difficult as she's ready for but the goal is to have her succeed and feel that satisfaction of knowing she can do it. It can be done with 3x5 cards and she can get extra practice everyday. I found that my kids liked to take the word cards and make sentences "I can run and jump on the couch".

Best of luck to you.

You can wait until school starts and ask your child's teacher to have her evaluated by a reading teacher - most public schools have this whether it's at that school or through the district. My 6 yr old 1st grader excelled once he got this extra help. It was like reading tutoring for a specific time during school hours. Plus, we used the same tutor/teacher after school 2 days a week (about $40 per session after school & no charge during school). You can also ask around as some parents w/older children may have gone through this and can give you a referral. You will be amazed at the progress/difference you will see. Good Luck from Lake Forest

Hi M.!
Some of what you wrote makes me think of my son at that age. He is now top of his class but back in first grade, we really struggled until we found out he had a vision tracking issue. This is something a regular opthamologist doesn't test. The doctor we went to see was Dr. Robin Rakov in Mission Viejo (I think?). My son went to vision therapy for months and it really worked. He is more than a fluent reader at this point. He loves to read! But maybe the problem isn't developmental? My daughter doesn't have vision issues. She just has a bad attitude toward reading. This summer I signed her up at www.bookadventure.com. After you read a grade appropriate book there, you can take a comprehension test, earn points, and redeem them for prizes. As a parent, you can enter in certificates for your own prizes such as an ice cream when 500 points are achieved. For a child this young, I would enter in a lot of prizes for very low points. It's fun! The books they have on their lists include most of the classics and popular books. We took the list with us to the library and chose our books there. I also really recommend a 15 min. reading out loud time every night. No more and no less. If your child is struggling with a word. Give it them quickly so there is no drawn out struggle. Explain the word and help them get past it quickly so that they can stay with the story and enjoy it. Enjoying reading is the key. My daughter likes to get a stuffed animal to read with us and wrap us both in a blankie. She has turned it into her snuggle time with mom! Finally make sure your child is reading a book that is easy for them, or at their level. Don't try to push them ahead to more advanced level. This is an easy mistake. It is more important that they LOVE to read then what they read. Your child is very young. So this is especially critical. Best of luck to you!

I have been teaching since 1980, most recently spent 13 year in kindergarten, and last year taught first grade. While it just may by developmental, I have to suggest that you have her eyes checked. Sometimes the far vision is fine, and that is all they check at a general before school doctor's physical. And some eye doctors tell parents their child is fine, just because they don't think they are reading yet. Sometmes it is not just simple focusing, but the eyes not working together, something like "LensCrafters" doesn't check for. I have noticed over the years children who have had problems learning to read in kinder, have glasses when they are older! Hopes this helps!

She's only starting first grade! You can't expect someone that age to read perfectly. My son is starting first grade, too, and when he's having trouble with a word, I read it for him. (That's what his kindergarten teacher told me to do. She said that kids get too frustrated if they have to spend a long time sounding out words.) If you're really concerned, talk to his teacher when he starts school. If it were me, though, I'd just let her have fun at home and let her teacher worry about whether or not she's a great reader.

I dont know where you love, but, my son did a class through UCI. But, he took it in Yorba Linda for readers. I think it was through their childhood ed dept. It was 10 weeks, 2 hrs once a week and the found his strengths and weekness'. it might help.

Hi MM,

Every child's different, so even though I'm going to recount my daughter's experiences, this does not mean that they will apply to yours. Go by your instincts to meet your daughter's needs. If you think early intervention is the best thing for her, do it now, as much for her emotional well being as for her educational success.

My DD, Laura, was very resistant to reading. She refused to learn from me and was able to learn to recognize single phonemes in kindergarten but just couldn't understand blending. First grade was a real challenge as far as reading was concerned but her teacher felt it was too early to be concerned because reading acquisition is highly developmental and for native english speakers, readiness usually emerges between the ages of 4 and 8. Laura also had substantial articulation difficiencies that probably played into her reading ability.

2nd grade was also tortuous, but then she suddenly took off towards the end of the year. Could be that by then she had developed better articulation through the preceding 2 years of speech therapy, or it could be that she was just finally ready. By 5th grade my "slow" child was identified as gifted and was reading at the high school level. By 7th grade, she was reading and comprehending books in the young adult section. By 8th grade she was reading graduate-level books on psychology and neuroscience, and conducting her own research in spelling dyslexia (she still can't spell very well!) and as a 9th grader her study caught the attention a neuroscience researcher at USC. She excels in school and is starting her own business.

6 1/2 is so very young -- just because she's not at the same level as some of her peers, that doesn't mean that she won't get there in her own time. If there's no vision problem, if her classmates don't make fun of her for being a lesser reader than they might be, and if she doesn't feel negatively about herself, why not give her a little more time to develop at her pace before becoming anxious?

Hi,

I am a first grade teacher with specialized training with reluctant readers. It sounds like your daughter just hasn't figured out the whole reading mystery and she shouldn't be pressured to...and it sounds like you're very sensative to that. Reading should be enjoyable and pressure free. She should be encouraged to make up stories using the pictures for cues. Regardless of her ability to sound out words, there are many, many elements of beginning reading and she should praised and encouraged for what she can do. Does she know her letters and their sounds? I'm happy to give you pointers on how to improve her confidence and ability if you want to contact me.

A.
____@____.com

Hi,
Reading your post almost made me cry. My wonderful, articulate, curious little boy had/has similar troubles. It turned out he has a specific learning disability. We asked the school to test him at the end of 1st grade when he wasn't up to his peers. He too, would say it was too hard and struggled with phonemic awareness, consonant blends, sight words, etc... His father, an English teacher and avid reader was/is astounded how this could be. We have gotten through the grief of acknowledging his disability and give him the best education and help we can afford. He still struggles, but is less frustrated now and will initiate reading on his own. He has amazing comprehension and memory which really helps balance out where he struggles. Your daughter may not be like my son, she may just catch up on her own, but do not hesitate getting the school involved in testing her, they have to provide support to her if indicated and may have some really helpful strategies & ideas for you. Most schools have a Reading Specialist who can help your daughter during school and provide you insight on how best to help your daughter.
I hope this helps a little. ~~L.

Dear M.,

Firstly, you are right to be aware of not making this into a power struggle. The way children learn to read is being read to. So you have the right thing going they need to hear the words spoken over and over again, so that their brains get the language imbeded, and flowing easily. Get a dog and let her read to the dog. I just saw a wonderful report on TV tonight about children reading to dogs that come to their schools regularly. They do it in, I think 8 Chicago schools now and are planning to have more schools doing it soon. Reading to a dog, puts no pressure on the child, and the dog loves it and doesn't mind if the reader doesn't know the words. Of Course, you have to be there to help with the words that she doesn't remember. Just do it non judgementally, and casually, and enjoy the moment with her and the dog or teddy bear or Dad or Grandma. The warmer and more cozy she feels, the faster she will learn.

.....and by the way could you read when you were 6 1/2 ? Great Balls of Fire ! Give the kids a break ! Amen, C. N.

Hello! I see you have quite a few responses, I don't have much advice but wanted to let you know you're not alone. My daughter is almost 6, I've been reading to her since she was literally weeks old... Chapter books like Charlotte's Web, Trumpet of the Swan, and HEIDI for goodness sakes (pretty advanced language), she always asks incredible questions, shares her own intelligent conclusions without even being asked etc. Comprehension is not a problem for her either. Well, earlier this year, I'll be darned if my nephew (same age) who constantly watches T.V. and plays VIDEO GAMES started flowing in the reading department! This boy hardly ever was read to, besides curling up with me now and then, and just had the knack for putting the sounds together! I have to admit, I was a pretty sore about the whole thing because a lot of attention was being given to how 'smart' he was, and all my dedication to educating, encouraging, etc was irrelevant! My daughter was getting frustrated pretty easily and not catching on very quickly at all.... well, I have to say, I think every child is different, these days reading is pushed on kids so very early and is so standardized..... My nephew still recognizes words quicker, in his head, not having to sound them out aloud despite his continued video game addiction. But, my daughter is building a life long love for LEARNING, reading for pleasure, and thinking in depth about what she reads, for that I am grateful. I do my best to encourage her without getting over bearing because I want her to do well. I try not to compare her to other kids and communicate to her teachers she is quite brilliant and I prefer not to pressure her. That being said, I wish you and your daughter all the best and I hope her brilliance is not overlooked due to a few phonetics.... they will be learned!
All My Best, M.

Hi M.,

As a former literacy remediation teacher, I empathize with your daughter's struggle to read, and with your desire to support and assist her. I strongly suggest that you have some educational testing done as soon as possible. It sounds as though she has difficulty with phonemic awareness, or the ability to discriminate between units of sound. It's a common problem, and easily remediated, if caught early and addressed before it impacts the child's self-esteem. I recommend an educational clinic in West LA called the Kelter Center, as a starting point. I worked there for many years and think highly of the Director, Sasha Borenstein, who performs ed. testing and creates programs that her own teachers then implement. The whole process is not cheap, so be prepared. Of course, your daughter can also be tested through LAUSD's IEP process, but it will take longer and probably not be as effective. You can contact the Kelter Center at ###-###-####, if you're interested.

Good Luck!
D. Markovic

i had the same issue with my daughter at that age. it turned into a power struggle and the brow beating, threatening, cajoling on my part still leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. She is now 16 and all is well. She does seem slightly dyslexic and I do mean slightly. Perhaps that was part of her problem back then. I wish I would have been more relaxed and honoring of her nature and pace. Peace, K.

Have her tested for vision accuracy, different than a vision test. Eye Care Center, in Fullerton has a great pediatric department. Most people would pass on the $$ for testing, but its really a small price to pay in order to find out the problem. It is worth the money to fix it now. My daughter was in the same situation. Turned out, that she had some vision issues that required therapy. She was too young for the therapy at the time, but we kept a watch on her over time, and followed the advice of the center. In the end, she wound up reading on her own, almost ALL THE TIME! I also know of people whose kids were in the same situation that did not get their children tested for vision accuracy, and their children do not read, but still like to be read to.

Hi M.!
The first thing that came to mind was to limit TV, movies, and other forms of exciting stimulation. When things are quiet, reading is fun. When there is too much going on all the time, it can seem 'boring'. Think about what made YOU love reading Snuggling up to read a book with your mom before naptime? A happy association with something else loving and fun? The repetition of fun rhymes that gradually made the words 'sink in'? Did you learn to read BEFORE there was a lot of TV? IF she is accustomed to watching TV, let it be a reward for doing other creative things (reading, cleaning, playing, chores, etc) and only allow her 1/2 hr a day of TV or none at all during the week - and never before bedtime (it stimulates the pineal glad that signals the brain to 'WAKE UP'!). It won't hurt her and will allow her mind to process what she HAS seen. I'm sure other mom's will have other good tips too - by the way - there are a lot of good tips on my website,
www.gomommygo.com
that can help you get her organized and have goals and rewards for behaviors.
I'm glad you asked this question!
I'd love to hear what worked best in the long run!
Cheers,
R.