Public Temper Trantrums from 2 Yr Old Son

Prevention. Just try to keep him busy while you are out. Involve him in shopping and what you do. Let him help out when he can. Make him a shopping list of his own for the grocery store from cut outs. If he doesn't get bored maybe he won't have tantrums. When he is bad, he must know that you mean business- that you will leave the store no matter what.

Maybe you should try telling him that he will be rewarded if he behaves, my daughter likes getting small treats when we are out. If she misbehaves after receiving the treat I always just take it back away, that straightens her back up.

I know it's hard to deal with because you feel like the world is judging your parenting skills but when my 2.5 year old son throws tantrums in public, I just ignore them and pretend they are not happening. I did the same thing with my older son and he learned that he did not get any special attention for acting out and that the tantrums did not do him any good. My younger son is a little more stubborn but he also seems to be learning that the temper tantrums don't acheive what he wants.

If I know the tantrum has something to do with my son not feel well or being overly tired, I will leave wherever we are and sit in the car with him until he is able to calm himself down.

Hope this helps a little,
T.

I tend to use the "if you don't behave I will put you in the cart" method. After a few times of follow through, my 2 year old has learn that mommy means what mommy says. I am not a big advicit of "ignore it". I think this method only teaches kids that if you have a problem I won't listen. Putting my daughter in the cart usually entails its own fit, but I calmly say "I understand that you do not want to be in the cart, but there are rules you need to follow and you are not following them. Mommy told you to (insert what ever he did wrong) and you did not listen so now you need to be in the cart" I feel this accoplishes several things, he understands you mean business, he understands you hear him, but are not giving in, and it covers the basis for all those judgemental people who are giving you the "why can't you handle your kid stair".

Hang in there, he will eventually get the idea of how to handle being out in public.

I'm not there yet, my son is only 6 months, but what my parents did with us, starting around your sons age, is before we left we were told that we had to be good, no screaming yelling whatever, if we acted up we were leaving, no matter where we were even if it was in the checkout line at the grocery store. (my mom would tell them my dad would be back and they just rolled the cart into their refridgerator). After actually leaving a few times, we never acted up out in public again. Key is to follow through and be consistant because the first time you give in you have to start all over again. good luck

Oh, I feel for you. My daughter was the worst of my two for tantrums. She has, (because she wanted a toy that I wouldn't buy her), thrown herself on the ground, and grabbed my legs saying, "Momma don't go", as I'm walking away from her. I'm sure everyone in the store thought I was cruel. It only lasted about 5 seconds before I very calmly picked her up, while she was kicking and screaming and walked out of the store.
I've also left a cart full of items at Toy R Us, and notified the cashier on the way out that it was in the back of the store.
Hang in there, it won't last forever. I just tried to keep my trips to two a day, and when they really go crazy, just leave and call it a day, and try again tomorrow. If you absolutley have to get shopping done that day, which I have, just remain calm, and ignore the tantrum. My response to people's looks was always, "she's two". Then they would smile.
Take care, he'll eventually grow out of it.
M.

My son did that and what seem to work is when I dropped everything picked him up and walked out of the store. Plus I didn't say a word to him. He was mad because there were things in the cart for him and he was so upset that someone else was going to take them. I have also ignored him but then you get people looking at you which are usally people who DO NOT have kids or understand that if you do hit your child someone would probably call the cops anyway.

Time outs don't work for a reason.

If he's throwing a temper tantrum scoop him up and leave. that's really your only recourse.

Good for you for not spanking btw. I don't either.

My DS is 2 1/2, I spent the last year or so NOT taking him anywhere if it was avoidable. He stayed home with dad, or with my MIL who drives down once every couple weeks to spend the day with him. I've started taking him out more recently and it's all about the planning.
**Make sure DS is rested, fed, and has had your undivided attention for a little bit.

**Trips need to be short---have a shopping list. Roll through the store and get what's on your list and head out.

**Browsing needs to be at a minimum. If I need an item and I am not sure where it is...I look quickly, and then come back without kiddo if I couldn't find it. This also means, no trips to the mall to "just look". A 2 yr old attention span can't handle that kind of outting.

**Distraction really can be powerful. I went to rent a movie recently, and had it all picked out online (no browsing). DS is scared of strangers and refused to move beyond 10 steps in the door. Luckily, there was a case for Dumbo the movie nearby. "Look DS, elephant!" I handed it to him and he was distracted long enough for me to grab the movie I wanted.

**Bring his favorite cup, book, toy. If you have to sit for a while bring crayons or a puzzle. I used to bring a couple options and bring the next one out when the previous "fun" wore off...always save the best for last.

**Involve him. "Can you hold mommy's list?" "Should we get bananas today? Which ones look the best?" I often can be found tooling around the store making zooming noises and funny faces at DS, oblivious to the people around me.

**When all else fails, ignore the tantrum and stay very very calm. He will feed off your nervous energy. Grab the essentials and get out. If you can't stay calm, abandon the basket and head home. It isn't worth getting all worked up over. Come back alone after daddy gets home.

These are the things I find help with my DS. Hopefully, you'll find a plan that works for yours. Good luck!

C., Battle Creek