Psychologist, Counselor, Therapist . . .

Sorry you are going through this. What a jerk! I talk to a therapist. I too was going through a hard time and decided to go see a therapist. I didn't have marraige troubles or anything, I just decided that I wanted to try to better myself. I wanted to be a nicer person and find new ways to handle stress, better coping mechanism's, etc. I knew I did not need medication, so seeing a psychologist was out. I just wanted to "talk" so I decided to see a therapist. It's been really helpful. I didn't have may friends in the area I lived in either, so it was nice to have a weekly appointment to get out and talk. And that's exactly what the appointments are like, just like sitting and talking to a good friend. I have learned a lot about myself, why I act the way I do sometimes, unresolved issues from my childhood, etc. So if that is what you are looking for, I suggest you seek out a therapist (or counselor, not sure what the difference is between the two). I just called my insurance company and they gave me her name, and my insurance covered it all. So call your insurance first to see what they cover and who are in-network doctors. Good luck and I hope you find the help you seek.

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I don't think it matters what "type" of person you talk to. You could even talk to ppl online if you don't have friends around there. As for the ex, I would say he used you for money, food, etc. while he spent his own money on this other woman. He should be ashamed of himself for stealing from you and your special needs children like that. I would cut him off immediately.

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Oh S. B., I started getting skeptical when I read the part, " So about 6 months ago..." and knew were this was going and sure enough I did. You need to cut him out of your life for good and get him off your phone plan, grocery plan, whatever it is he is freeloading off from you. Sounded like he was playing nice so he could have the money to spare on his new fling. Sorry, just outside looking in.

Anyway, enough of that, moving on. Me personally would go to a pastor or priest and then usually if it's something that is out of their "realm" I guess you could say, they will usually suggest going to a therapist or counselor. Speaking with priests or pastors are free. (I've been there with a certain situation and my priest referred me to someone that could better help me with the particular situation I was in -- he actually contacted the person first before forwarding me to her). Also churches always have open arms and the congregation is willing to help out someone in need materially, spiritually and mentally. You'd be surprised at how much support you get :) I say support because I believe your are a smart woman that just got swindled and it happens to a lot of smart women.

If that's not your cup of tea, go onto BabyCenter.com and post your journal, your concerns, this n that and you'll also be able to make friends on BC as well (there are TONS!!! of groups on there). It just doesn't seem like you need therapy or counseling, but more of support and someone to talk to and give you encouragement to keep putting that first foot forward. You'll get through this. You're understandably upset and it's not something you'll get over right away because it hurts, but time will help you heal and before you know it, it's just a blip in the story of your life.

All I can say is keep going, keep moving past this and it sounds like your a strong person that is willing to do whatever it takes to provide for your kids. Six kids and making it all happen - That is awesome!!!!

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I would no longer be his support for sure. A psychiatrist can prescribe meds if you feel depressed and need something, but qualified psychologist would help fine as well.

I'm sorry this all has happened, I hope the best for you and your family! I hope maybe you can find a divorced support group or moms group in the area you can join to really make some connections.

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Call your PCP and ask for a recommendation.
Perhaps you "sensed" something wasn't right with your ex....good for you.
I would say that's the end of his....ahem....free ride!
Don't be a doormat. Best wishes.

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Short answer; a psychologist.

But I'd also be prepared "shop" for one because not all people are equal (meaning just because a person has the education, doesn't mean that we would click OR that their philosophy and mine would gel)... but it's still a heckuva lot better place to start shopping than under the ubiquitous "counselor" title (my neighbor, for example, is a licensed counselor because she paid the $60 for the license. She's an inbred idiot full of hate, and ignorant about the most *basic* of things (PPD in her mind is caused by not loving your child as much as you should, or by being a "feminist"... IDIOT), but she has a full client list. It's kind of squares and rectangles. Most psychologists are counselors (the ones who aren't are researchers), but not all counselors have even a fraction of the education, much less the oversight and intern hours.

I would be livid as well, but it just shows you have a kind heart. He tricked you, but that's not your fault. You gave him a 2nd chance and he not only blew it, but showed his true colors/intent. He doesn't want you for yourself, he wants a mommy for himself.

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I would contact your doctor and ask for a recommendation. That is how I found my psychologist. It sounds like you just need a sounding board, so you may not need the MD designation, but recommendations are really the best way to go. I don't have girlfriends where I live either, and that sounding board is so important. Good luck.

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Think Karma....you have a good heart & he knew he could take advantage of you. Don't feel bad for being a good person & helping someone in need & someone that you planned on having a future with, you have nothing to feel ashamed about. He on the other hand doesn't deserve someone like you so cut him out like cancer. Cut off the cell phone & whatever bills you have been paying for him. Lock your doors & never let him in your home & only be civil for the sake of the children. And thank God that you didn't sell your home & buy one with him because he would have had rights to the equity & really stole your money.

Seek a psychologist for someone to talk to. Best wishes