T.T. asks from Denton, TX on January 03, 2008
Happy New Year!
To my very humble self, a dear friend is hosting a baby shower to bless me and our little number four Matthew who is due in February.
I had a baby shower for my first child and I don't think I followed proper etiquette.
I sent a Thank you note but never gave her a gift of appreciation.
What is proper?
A gift? Should I give it to her before or after the shower?
Thank you so much.
C.S. answers from Amarillo on January 04, 2008
How exciting about the 4th one on the way!! I think all hostesses need to recieve a small gift and mybe a little something extra for the one who shares her home for the shower. Then cards can be sent out to the guests who sent you a gift. Hope this helps!!
T.L. answers from Dallas on January 03, 2008
I just went through this myself. I read and feel that it is not expected, nor should it be, that an expecting mother should not give a gift for the host of the shower. I gave thank you cards and expressed verbally my appretation. I had a very hard time not doing it, but I'm glad I didn't. It was too much pressure to give the perfect gift. Nothing can top someone giving you a shower, unless you give them one back.
Have fun and congrats,
J.K. answers from Houston on January 05, 2008
I think it would be a nice thing to do. It does not have to be perfect, it's just a gesture to show your appreciation. Gifts that I have given/received for showers:
- a nice candle,
- a flower pot used as a gift basket with champagne and gardening stuff in it,
- a massage gift certificate to local massage school,
- starbucks card
I'd say all the gifts were definitely under $30. I have not received a gift for every shower I've thrown, and I was not offended that I did not receive a gift, but it is nice to get one.
S.L. answers from Dallas on January 03, 2008
After just giving my baby sis her shower this month to welcome my soon to be niece, I do not expect anything in return. I hosted and did everything for the shower from invitations to food to favors/prizes for 25 people, and I did it out of the kindness of my heart and my love for her. The look on her face and gratitude was thanks enough for me. I love hosting. Most people who host showers do because they want to, not because they feel obligated. I say a nice thank you card would suffice, but if you feel you need to get a gift, just do something simple like a gift card to her favorite restaurant, beauty salon, etc. Something she can indulge in.
M.G. answers from Dallas on January 18, 2008
A Hostess gift is always appropriate for someone that throws your a party of any kind. I go to Dillards, to the wedding registry area (home/housewares) and check out their clearence section... they always have some neat things for relativly inexpensive. You should give your hostess gift the day of the shower (after most of guests have left). If not then, it is better late than never. Check out http://www.emilypost.com/ It is the Emily Post Institue's website... all things etiquette can be found here.
M. answers from Dallas on January 03, 2008
I have had wedding showers and baby showers thrown for me and I have always given the hostesses a token of appreciation. I think it is not only the proper, but the right thing to do. There is a lot of planning and preparation that goes into throwing someone a shower and a gift from the honoree is always nice. It is standard to give the gift to the hostess after the shower is over and the guests have left.
As far as what to give, that totally depends on your friend. I love receiving soy candles, nice soaps for the powder room, monogrammed stationary, etc. A friend of my husband's family threw me a VERY nice bridal brunch/shower and I gave her a nice vase.
Good luck in whatever you decide!