Problems with My Nine Year Old Son and 15 Year Old Cousin

I do not understand your post.

I find it strange that a nine year old boy would want to cuddle with a 15 year old sister.

So when you punish the 15 year old, how long do you do it? What does she say? How does she respond?

Your last few sentences confuse me....why is the cousin involved? Who's older sister? How many older sisters are there?

If anything it sounds like the 15 year old does not want the responsibility of watching her siblings. Perhaps it's time to get a babysitter for them.

How often do you work? What hours?

I think there is a lot of missing information, and punctuation helps.

Please update

JIC
Problems with my nine year old son and 15 year old cousin
My son is constantly coming to me crying because his older sister is making fun of him, I keep on talking to her and she doesn't litsen, I have grounded her, taking things away from her and making her loose out on stuff like hanging with her friends, what should I do? He has told me that she makes fun of his looks for having a baby face he asked her if they can cuddle one times and she started calling him a baby for wanting to cuddle with her. He was being bullied at school at the time and she bullies him at home I have stern talks about it but she doesn't care but his cousin laughs at it his older sister tries to stop her but it doesn't work or he goes crying to his older sister she is the one who takes care of him when I'm at work but please please help me!
SO WHAT HAPPENED?™

Thank you!! My 9 year old son is very affectionate, and my punctuation isn't good because there is something wrong with the period and comma, it's better now. I am going to hire a nanny soon and see if it helps. I'm taking them to a physiatrist now, we had there first one today right when I saw it, I took them and it can't wait another day..... But my niece is starting to be nicer to him (not too much nicer only 1%) we are working on it though but yeah, my daughter is watching him too to see anything bad happens again. And it's my niece who is bullying him I will try and enroll him in a after school activity soon. He lives sports so I will do that. This is not fake. His cousin makes fun of him his sister helps him and troll someplace else

Yep, troll!

I wouldn't let her continue watching him if she treats him that way. In fact, since she can't get her act together, maybe you hire a nanny for BOTH of them.

Also, it might be time to seek professional help for your daughter. Maybe meeting with a therapist is in order to get to the bottom of why she's bullying and gain tips for controlling herself. It's not normal to treat your sibling that horribly. My brother and I didn't get along, but it was never that mean-spirited.

I am having a problem figuring out if your older daughter is bullying your son or the 15 year old cousin is bullying your son. Also I am not sure of who is taking care of your son while you are at work. Perhaps if you clarify the information, you will be able to get more help on this site. If your daughter is the one bullying your son, i would take her to individual and family counseling to help her make more positive changes in her behavior. Your son deserves to have a safe environment after school. Can you enroll him at an after school program at his school? Many are available on a sliding scale basis. Good luck

It's possible she's being bullied herself or she was oppressed in her home before yours. To get rid of the stress this causes people often take it out on those weaker than themselves.

I think it was "I'm Okay, You're Okay" that explained it to me the best.

It's I'm okay but you're not. This is how people who don't think they are okay or they've been made to feel bad about themselves so they make others feel bad about themselves to make themselves feel superior. It doesn't work and they just do it more because by them they've gotten in the habit of it.

I'm a little confused about all the relationships here. But near as I can tell from your original post, the cousin (your niece) is not the problem. Your daughter is the problem. But then your SWH says the niece is doing it and your daughter is watching??

Whoever the teen girl is who is bulling him, she thinks that bullying is okay. She doesn't feel good about herself and that's why she makes other people feel bad. So family therapy is a good idea. You can't avoid time with siblings but you may need to keep your child away from his cousin. Talking to teens over and over about the same thing when they just laugh at your is pointless - the definition of "insanity" is doing things over and over the same way, and expecting a different result. Are you paying this babysitter? Stop.
And tell her why. You don't let a teenager inflict emotional harm.