Private School vs Public School - Denton,TX

I attended private school PK- college and am neither sheltered nor abnormal. That's incredibly "sheltered" thinking on your husband's part. Keep in mind that if you commit to private education at a young age, you are making a long-term financial commitment for your family (assuming your younger child would attend as well).

You really need to look far more closely at the programs themselves. If the private school "ends" after Kindergarten, then put your son in public school so that he "starts school" with his peers. If the private schools goes through elementary, then it's a different story.

I am a public school administrator and former public school psychologist and would strongly advocate for your child attending his local elementary school if the quality of the instruction is as high as it sounds. Save your $$ for college!

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If he is going tothe best school in the district, then I'd investigate the district to see how good the best is. If it is real good, send him to the public school. I had two kids that went to private school for a while. One because he missed the birthday cutoff by a couple of days, the other because he was failing in public school. Public school also failed him.

The one that I put in private school because he was born a couple of days late ended up being validictorian. The one that did not do well academically continued to not do well academically. I later discovered that his mom was undermining his education by doing his homework for him and reading his reading assignments to him instead of making him read his work/books.

If you want to have the biggest positive impact on your childrens education, make sure he does his homework and how to do his homework. The "how" is more important than the actual work, but not by much. Also, teach him how to study. I was always a "B" and "C" student with an occasional "D" thrown in. My wife graduated #8 in a class of 1200. It wasn't until I saw her studying for the courses to get her bachellors degree that I learned how to study. When I applied what I learned from watching her I got an "A" in my master's course. I graduated validictorian from my police academy.

I hope this has helped. Good luck to you and yours.

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Sounds like the public school where you live is great and would help him make friends with the neighborhood kids.

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I don't really understand how sending a child to a private school makes them sheltered. My two oldest went to private school and sheltered would be the last thing that comes to mind when people meet them.

Is there no private school options closer to where you are? In the long run he does need to be close to his friends. If not he will be isolated out of school. Still if he is doing well in private schools why not look for one closer.

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We had our kids in private schools from K4 right up until they were going into 6th grade and 3rd grade. So perhaps I can offer a little bit of perspective?

If you can, and you are happy with the private school, even knowing you plan to put him in public school for first grade... then keep him in the private school for now. Kids are so resilient to change it won't hurt him to switch for first grade. And when they are smaller/younger, is when they need that one on one so much more, and that loving security that they can get in private school. I know my kids regularly got and gave hugs to their teachers--and that sort of thing isn't always "acceptable" in public school.
I am not putting down public school teachers, kinder or otherwise, but they are more limited in what they are able to do emotion-wise by the fact that it is public. My son's kindergarten class had 16 kids in it (large for a private school) and one had a dad who had brain cancer. The teacher's dad (in another state) coincidentally also had brain cancer. The way the teacher and that student and all the other students were able to rally around each other for support and hugs and love would never happen in a public school situation. One of my son's greatest assets is his sensitivity and thoughtfulness. And that was nurtured in him a great deal in that small private school setting. He stayed in private schools (not the same one) until he started middle school last year (6th grade) and is now finishing up 7th grade. I wouldn't go back and switch him to public for those years if I had it to do over.
Our daughter made the switch going into 3rd grade. She is an extremely bright and emotionally mature young lady. She is introverted and reserved and can sometimes come across as "above" things, because she tends to be an observer for longer than most before she is ready to jump in. She doesn't give her friendship casually and has a fierce sense of justice. She was given many opportunities that just wouldn't have existed in the public system. (weekly foreign language class, music class, computer class, drama for school productions, art class, and phenomenal field trips--end of the year field trip for 2nd grade was a 2 night overnight trip to Disney, with a behind the scenes science/mechanics program at Disney). Now that she is in public school, she is in a gifted/talented program and still gets to do some wonderful things... but the class at large doesn't do nearly as much. They have lost music and art in all the elementary schools in our area due to budget cuts and they never had foreign language.

So, my vote would be to keep him there for Kindgergarten. LOTS of families don't make the switch to public until first grade. It sounds like it makes your life a heck of a lot easier to keep him there one more year anyway. So why not?

Since he is an August baby I suggest that you keep him in private for kindergarten this year. That way if he struggles and has to repeat it for some reason it makes the process easier on your son. Also, since he is on the young side, the bigger classes/school may make kindergarten a bit more challenging for him. Private gives him one more year to mature and grow before putting him in public.

I'm not sure I understand why private school for kindergarten would make him sheltered or not normal. He's going to be barely 5! He has lots of time to mature and make friends! Small private schools give them the extra attention and "love" that the teachers of larger classes just can't give! He will not be sheltered, he's going to school with other kids. And some of the things that he is being "sheltered" from are things that you may not want him exposed to at this age anyway!

I have both my boys (6 & 9) in a small private school and I love the environment that they are in! They are accepted by their peers (my older son has Aspberger's so that's a big deal) and they have never had to worry about being bullied. I have friends in excellent public schools who's sons have been bullied and physically hurt (one had a shoe print on his back) and the school wasn't even aware of it. I know that it is part of growing up, but in kindergarten?!? My boys are normal (older one is not treated differently at this school) and not sheltered. They are staying innocent longer though, which I LOVE!

Good luck with your decision! I know that it's a difficult one! We went through the same thing when kindergarten came around for my older son. I NEVER considered private school, but once we started and we saw how well our kids were doing, we just couldn't pull them out!

Would he be able to stay in the private school past Kindergarten? Or is that the highest that it goes?

If it only goes up to Kindergarten, I say put him in the public school. You are going to have to make the break, and it's easier if you do it before Kindergarten.

If you keep him in the private school, and move him to the public one for 1st grade, he will not be on equal footing socially. While all those kids & families were busy getting to know each other & making friends in Kindergarten, your child will have to be the "new kid" and start from scratch. Friendships & bonds will already be formed & your child will be at a disadvantage.

Also, if you keep him in the private school, he will have another year to bond with these kids, and it will make the move to 1st grade even harder. Better to do it now while he's younger & probably won't remember.

I am not a fan of moving your kid around like that unless you absolutely have to. I was moved around a lot & I absolutely hated it.

Our kids are in a Private school (Montessori) and we have OUTSTANDING Public schools. They have needed to be somewhere full time as we both work and once they were of age, we wanted them in a structured environment with a good education. From the beginning, we did not know how long we would stay there or at what point we would switch. MANY families seems to stay through Kindergarten and then move to Public. We are now coming to the end of our Kindergarten year and have decided to send our oldest at least one more year there. She will have a small class size moving into Elementary, the academics put the kids about 6 months ahead of the Public school curriculum and it's a VERY peaceful, respectful and structured environment. We could save at least $8000 by moving one child to Public (our youngest is only 3), BUT we (she) is GAINING sooooo much by staying where she is and while we can afford it, we are going to do it.

Does this mean she will go to college and get a great paying job-NOPE. But, we certainly know this will not hurt her or set her back in any way.

If you can afford it, keep your child in private school--a good private school until he graduates from high school! Public school is deficient on many levels.

Ummm your husband sounds out of whack. I didn't go to private school (I soooo wish I would have, public education did nothing for me. I'm in college right now and I'm learning things I should have learned in first grade) but I know several people who did go to private school and they are as normal as can be. Sounds like he needs to meet people that went to private school and see just how normal they are.
As for your public school, is it a good one? What is the test scores like? What is the drop out rate for your area (I know that it doesn't seem like it matters now, but I find the worse off the district is the higher the drop out seems to be), Are the facilities nice? Not mold infested and what not. I would go digging around and find the statistics.

We're not talking 13 years of school here, we're talking K only, right? My daughter had plenty of classmates who went to private K before entering the public school system in first grade and all of them were fine, outgoing, well socialized and ready for first grade socially and academically. Your child won't be "sheltered and not normal" -- where is your husband getting that from? Sounds like maybe you and he need to have some talks about his perceptions of school, period. I have no idea what is "not normal" about this choice, so maybe he should explain that to you, because in the future, will he find things that are "not normal" about other aspects of school, public or private? Just a thought.

Honestly, I think you need to go and "interview" the public school and see how you feel about it. My son also went to a very nice private pre-k that offered Kindergarten. I was torn between public Kindergarten and private Kindergarten. My son was already reading by the end of PreK. So, I went and interviewed the public school to see what they could offer my child. They told me that their Kindergarten was all about teaching the kids to walk in line, raise their hands, go to the bathroom by themselves, they would learn their letters - and hopefully they would be reading by Spring. I wanted to cry. My son could already do ALL of those things. So, I kept him in private Kindergarten. Three weeks after Kindergarten started, the teacher came to me and said that since my son was already reading, she wanted to enroll him in the 1st grade reading program. All in all, my son THRIVED in the private Kindergarten (8 kids). Then, I went ahead and kept my son in private school for 1st grade as well. That experience was "okay". There were 10 kids in the class and honestly, I think that was too few children for him at this age group. I transitioned him to public school this year - in 2nd grade and I think that was a great grade for transitioning. Our public school offers a gifted and talented program starting in 1st grade and my son participated in that. His GT class was first and second graders one day a week.

I think my son would be fine to stay in public school, but he won the lottery system for a local charter school that focuses more on computers and fine arts and so he will be going there starting in 3rd grade. There, I think every day will be more like his one day in GT class at public school and so I think it is the best option for my son.

Oh, and just one more bit of data, my son has a June birthday, so he is always the youngest or next to the youngest in his class and he does fine socially, etc.

Good luck with the decision!
L.

I personally would continue with the private if you could afford it. I had this same dilema but I think at 5 the culture shock of a public school where he was accustomed to the attention in private might scare him off especially in a new big boy grade as kindergarten. I would wait until he is older to send to public school, but that's just my opinion!

Most public schools offer before & after-school care. Ours does, the YMCA is the enttity that actually offers the childcare, but it is AT her school.

I went to private school until fifth grade and absolutely hated it. The kids were so mean, the teachers were so uncaring if you didn't fit the mold... they passed my brother along for years even though he had a learning disability and they never addressed it.

I know that that problem is probably just with that school, I don't discriminate all private schools. I'm positive that there are good ones out there.

The reason we ultimately went with public schools is because we could not justify spending $12-$15,000 per year per child on top of the school taxes we were already paying. That's just not something we were willing to do. We also live in an exemplary school district and my daughter's school is absolutely wonderful. The teachers have been phenomenal, the principal is very strict, they do not tolerate bullying, and my daughter has had no problem making friends. I am glad we made the choice we made.

Good luck!

I teach in the public school system, and I think it comes down to how good/bad the public system is in the area he would go. There are good public school districts, so do some investigating. Look at class sizes, test scores, attendance rates, drop-out rates, the area around the school (apartments vs homes vs abandoned empty lots, the type of environment says a lot about the schools themselves) the facilities themselves, meet the teachers, ask if you can tour the place he would go to, and bring him along. Look at the cafeteria, the gym, and the library, check out the availability of technology, look at the webpage and see if the school has teacher webpages and check out the pre-k page. How updated is it, does if have daily agendas, etc. We went through this same thing with our son about 6 weeks ago. I was in love with some of the smaller private schools, but when we went to the public one he will attend for kinder I was so pleasantly surprised. The teachers were wonderful, the classrooms were organized, motivating, cheerful, my son loved the cafeteria (they invited us to come spend part of a morning with them that included breakfast), he also loved the "big library mommy" with all the books and story-time. We decided that ultimately an additional year at the school he will be attending for grade school is in his best interest, in our opinion. He can start forming friendships that he will be able to have all through school now. Even though our visit there was back in April, he still talks about it all the time.

I would talk with your husband about his fears....maybe it's a financial thing he's worried about instead of "being sheltered and normal"......this is sooo not the case!!!

If your son needs to be challenged and kept on task then a private school is the way to go to ensure he doesn't slip through the system.

Private schools offer more than just smaller classes - they offer an education that is usually much better than public schools. I will have to inbox you and let you know the name of the website that lets you check schools out....

http://www.greatschools.bet

If it were me? I would chose private over public...unfortunately, here in DC private school for two boys is $40K a year...just a tad out of our budget....

GOOD LUCK!!