Private or Public School

if you are concerned about your daughter's education and have the money to spend, i would honestly look into some sort of home school program, and that doesn't mean you have to do the schooling. i know a woman who does homeschooling for kids who do not flourish in a public school system, and she is amazing. she takes these kids that are 1 or 2 grade levels behind where they "should" be, and puts them a grade level or two ahead of their peers. if you can find something like that, it might be far more valuable than public vs private.
i have a friend who is 26, and she was VERY self-motivated to get the most out of her education. so even though she went to one of oregon's poorer, lower rated school districts and her parents were not as involved in her education as they could have been, she is now on the fast track to get through law school (3 years as opposed to 4 or more) after working her tail off to graduate from OSU with a 5 year bachelors in 4 years. another friend of mine went to a private school her whole life, and her parents would have been better saving the money and sending her to public school. she is 30, got kicked out of her high school and never went back to school (though eventually got her GED within the last 5 years), never went to college, relied on everyone else to drive her places until she finally got her driver's license 2 years ago, has only ever worked mcdonald's despite being a single parent and needing health insurance for her 2 kids, and has no interest in doing better for herself or her kids. based on that, i would say it's not the school that makes the education. it's the teachers and the parents who stand behind the child and give the child the tools to learn and can hopefully instill a love of learning in the child. but ultimately, the decision to make use of a good education falls on the child.
good luck with your decision.

1 mom found this helpful

So I have not had to go through this as a parent, however, I attended both private and public schools as a student and I have taught at both private and public schools as a teacher. I have found that your involvement as a parent is paramount either way. I have also found that the OTHER parents of your child's class mates will be far more likely to be involved in their child's lives in the private school setting. When I taught at private school, the parents were seeking me out at least weekly to find out how their child was doing and if they needed any additional support at home or if I needed additional support in the class room. At public school, I got cursed out by parents regularly if I called them to discuss their student (who were often failing due to the fact that they refused to turn in home work and would hand me tests back blank). It is a very different mentality in public and private schools.

That being said, as a child my parents made it very clear that they didn't care what my friends were doing, I was to be respectful of the teachers and I was to bring home good grades. They also made it very clear that if I was struggling to meet their expectations of me, I could ask for help and they would do everything in their power to help me or find someone who could help me. Thus I was a straight A student (dispite the fact that I disliked my schools) through out my school expereinces, regardless of if I was in a private or public setting. In highschool, my parents gave me the choice to continue attending the private highschool I was currently attending on scholarship and hated, or go to the public high school my friends attended. I choose to stay at the private school I hated because they offered more AP classes.

My acedemics allowed me to get a full scholarship to college and complete my bachelors degree in 2 years. I attribute all of that to my parents and their attitude. I have a learning disability for which I was never medicated (my parents are anti-meds) and IO was still able to acheive more than I ever thoght possible. This was not due to public or private schools. This was due to my parents. They told me I was different, but perfectly capable of acheiving anything. They supported me and showed me that these were not just empty words. Both of my parents worked full time, but they found time to help me study when I was struggling and stqayed up until 2 am helping me learn for various tests or many occasions. They also didn't allow me to give up. They said that everyone has a job and school was my job. They told me that everything else that I wanted to do was only possible if I was doing well in school. They told me that the rules are the same for adults - if they do poorly at their jobs, they could loose their job and then they can't afford the activities that they enjoy. If I didn't do well in school, I wouldn't beable to get a job that paid well enough for me to do what I enjoy.

So all that being said, follow your gut instinct and you wil choose the right school. Either way, the attitude that you demonstrate and instill in your child will get them much further in school than their teachers, peers, or the name on the front of the building. As teachers, we like to think that we are the ones makingthe difference, but the reality is that the parent is the person who teaches their child to value education and strive for success dispite the situation they are faced with.

Best of luck!!

L.

1 mom found this helpful

If you're thrilled with the school she is currently in, I would keep here there.

If, however, after visiting the PubSch she'd be going to you like the public school BETTER...trade schools.

Private schools TEND to be a LOT better then public schools. It's not always the case. What's most important, in my opinion is the education...not where she's getting it.

I have a short criteria list for good schools: Safe, Fun, & Interesting. It took visiting over 48 preschools to find 4 that met that criteria (all private). After a similarly huge number of private/public elementary schools only 2 met that criteria. One public, & one private. Now, I didn't think to apply my school criteria until after my son was in his assigned kindergarten having a miserable time. It was safe, but not fun and not interesting. Aaargh. Hard year.

In Washington, in the school districts near us, you have to pay for full day kindergarten (3000 p/year). We paid it. 90% of the entire experience was regrettable. For first grade I had a short list of 2 schools. One we couldn't afford (21k), and the public one we couldn't get into (we were # over 200 on the waitlist for a 30 person class).

So we decided to homeschool. We'd already been planning on HS in middleschool, though, so it wasn't a huge leap for us. Regardless, we spent months thinking about the decision.

If you have a great thing going, why "fix" it? And if it's not something you rave about...why keep it? If you can answer those questions, you'll most likely have your answer.

Good Luck!

It is hard to say without knowing your school. So I would suggest that you go to the school, ask to see the school. They may even let you sit in on a class for a little while.
Keep in mind that over the summer staff can change. But in general you would have a good idea of the school.
I would also suggest asking when the PTA meeting is, and attending it. Talk to the other parents and see what they have to say.
When do you need to make the choice? Can you register her for both and then meet with the teachers in public school before it starts, and go from there?
You are luck that you have the choice. My daughter is going to a JR high I wish I could take her out of and chose a different one.

Ohh the other important thing is that no matter which school you chose, stay involved.... Be in the PTA, volunteer in the class, attend the field trips. Even when they get to the age where they don't want you around (about jr high) stay involved. It pays off in the long run...
Hugz
B.

I come about this topic on both sides of the coin. I am a public school teacher, but I also entertain the idea of sending my child to a private school, like a Waldorf school. I think it REALLY depends on the schools available. I would go visit the public school kindergarten to get a sense of the teacher. It is (mostly) all in the teacher...as you may know going to school yourself. It also has to do a GREAT deal with the other kids in the class. That class would be the class they go through school with, so you sort of get "stuck" with what you got. All groups are different. I know this extremely well because of seeing classes come and go. Anyhow, whatever you do, check both situations out well before you make a decision. Just ask the kindergarten teacher if you could sit in for an hour or even just a half of an hour. You may be very impressed or not. Good luck!

Have you thought about homeschooling? My husband and I have done a lot of research into educating our children and decided to homeschool. Research shows that children in Preschool vs. children who go straight into Kindergarten are equal by the 2nd grade. That said, it should be a personal decision, but we feel that we know our children best and can adapt the curriculum to their needs, rather than to a group of 30, where if they are having problems, they may be overlooked. It's very exciting and we take a ton of field trips and rejoice in their learning. We hear a lot of "what about socializing?" but children go to school to learn, not to play with their friends! Our kids are around other kids constantly, have a lot of adult interactions, as well. Our area has a wonderful homeschooling support group, too.
As far as cost, homeschooling doesn't have to be expensive, either.

Hi T.,

I personally don't have much faith in the public school system all together.Not as much in other states as much as my own of course since I myself went thru it here and was failed miserably as someone who needed some extra help at times because of learning disabilities and hearing loss.

I plan to let my daughter do a little schooling in public school to get a group of friends together because she doesn't attend daycare and then be home schooled.I'm not yet sure if she will be schooled by me or if I will find a SAHM to do it who may teach her own kids/others kids.She is only 2.5 yrs old tho so I have a little time before having to really buckle down and figure it all out.Right now our fight is potty training and finding a preschool who will take her not completely potty trained.

I myself went with private school for Kindergarten for $400/month last year & I don't regret a penny of it. I was in the same situation as you public didn't have all day or even all week school. My daughter is now at the top of her publuc first grade class, 4 classes 30 kids in each class. Now she goes to public since it is all day. I volunteer in the school alot now and stay involved with her homework & we read alot. If you just keep reading with her that is the most important thing. I did get into debt for it but, now that she is in public we are alredy out of debt 6 months later, it really was worth it.

The decision of whether or not to put your child into private or public school will be a difficult one for me as well. My daughter is currently in a private preschool and absolutely thriving. I do however, think that I will go the route of the public kindergarten.
I think that the experience a child has in any school system is greatly dependent on the interaction and participation of their parents. One of the reasons I think private schools might seem to be so much "better" is that the parents are paying out of pocket for their child's education and in most instances are more involved in their academics. When it comes to a child's experience in school, the involvement of the parents can make a huge difference in the quality of education. So, I honestly think that if you commit to being involved with the school, your child can have a good experience in the public school system. If you promise yourself to put the money into a savings account that you would have spent on private school, your child would have an amazing start to funding for college. I would think that would be more beneficial.
There is an amazing website that rates all schools across the country. It is www.greatschools.net This website compares teacher/student ratios, student funding, test scores and comes up with a number rating based on all that info. It would allow you to quantify the quality of that particular school. Good luck in your decision!!

Hi T. - I have a son who is in Kindergarten, full day (which we pay for, ugh). He LOVES his class, his teachers, and school in general. It was very tough for me to send him off to school (as I am sure it is for every mom) but he has really thrived and has a teacher who just loves teaching kindergarteners.
Someone suggested sitting in on a Kindy class, and I would have loved that, but it is kinda difficult. Unless there is only ONE kindergarten teacher, we have 6!
Just letting you know that a lot of kids have very positive experiences with public school as well.
L.

Hi T.,
Some things to consider in making your decision:
Do you need to have your daughter in school all day to have time alone at home to start your business? Or, some moms would rather have a kindergartner home a half day before they go off to school full-time.

Do you plan to continue with the private school or public school and would staying in the same school be advantageous? Not just for your daughter but but for you since "getting in" to a school early may help you to get to know the teachers and other parents and give you a head start in getting involved.

Are there children in the neighborhood her age that will go to the public school? If so, would it be a good experience for her to go to school with the kids she is growing up with?

We homeschooled and sent our kids to private school. Each had its pluses and minuses. I've noticed that the kids who do the best in school and in life are the ones whose parents spend time with them and play an active role in their education, no matter what type of school they attend.

If I had the means to afford private school for my son, I would do it in a heart beat! He will be going into Kindergarten next year and is in a private preschool right now at my mom's church. I actually posted a request here on mamasource not that long ago on this subject. We have decided to go with the public school that is right around the corner from us. I've heard great things about it. It's called Pioneer Valley Elementary. I still might home school down the road in a couple of years. We'll see. Good luck!

That is a very hard choice to make. I have my boys in private preschool as well. My second son will be in Kindergarten next year and we were debating sending him to the public school where our oldest boy is at due to the convenience. The kindergarten school is 20 minutes across town. After talking to the teachers they think it is smart to give the soon to be kindergarteners one more year under their belt of where they are comfortable, they will have been with the same group for three years and the same two teachers for the past three years. Why put them in the situation where he will be in the youngest grade level at the school and where it is so large versus keeping him where he feels comfortable and knows the system so well. The preschool only goes up to kindergarten.

Hard decision to make. We also debated sending our oldest to private school for first grade but we are extremely pleased with the neighborhood public school.

Hope my situation helps a little.

S.

Check out the scores from the public school she would attend, that may help you decide. My child goes to a public school with consistently low scores and she's bored most of the time. We would have put her in privates school years ago if that were financially possible. Also, just because schools are supposed to have the same curriculum doesn't mean they are all the same. If your child is doing well then I'd advise leaving her where she is.
Hope this helps:)
-B

As a public school teacher, and advocate for public education, I'd say go with what you're comfortable with. If you can afford to keep your child in private school where both of you are happy, do it. Both will have the same curriculum so the content won't be different. Public schools are made up of all kinds of kids and families. You're child will become part of a diverse classroom, which many private schools can't offer. They pick and choose children and generally are exclusive to those with money. If you want your child to have fun, be safe, and be in a diverse environment public is the way to go. I also know that kindergarten teachers are the hardest workers in the business. They thrive on parent help and support. Even if you can't come in during they, things always need to be cut out for kindergartners. Take stuff home and make the school the kind of place you want your child to be at. That's the key to making your public school great, get involved!
Good luck!
K. T.

T.,

I'm not sure where you are writing from but if it is in the Tri-Cities I believe I know the school. My daughter went to a private pre-school for two years followed by all-day kindergarten at the same school for about $350 per month.

I was beyond thrilled with the preschool and it was for that reason that I decided to pay the money to keep her there for kindergarten. This was not easy for me to do financially as I am a single parent of two and make ok but not necessarily good money. Ultimately though her education was too important to me.

Unfortunately, to say I was disappointed in the kindergarten program would be a gross understatement. She finished preschool doing far more than they were doing HALF way through kindergarten! Mind you this was the same school where preschool had taken place. When I brought up the concerns to her teacher she explained that they get kids who have not previously attended preschool and that they must teach to the bottom of the class and my daughter was near the top. It has always been my experience that a school should teach to the middle, give the lower students additional help, and give the higher students additional challenges. She was bored out of her mind which in turn created some behavior issues that she had never had before.

After talking to some other parents and then the principal, I discovered that they only had a set curriculum for grades 3-8 and "working on" establishing curriculums for K-2 but were working backwards 1 grade at a time. Imagine my horror when I found out this piece of news! I'm talking about a long-established school here, not some recent start up and there was no way I was going to allow my daughter to be the guinea pig.

I, along with a few other sets of parents, pulled her out of the private school and put her in public school beginning in first grade. However, that 1 year caused her great disservice. She hated school because she was bored and then started 1st grade behind. She had always been an extremely smart little girl and up until kindergarten had always been pretty advanced for her age. (She was doing addition and subtraction, and had started reading among other things.) She doing well now and is at the top of her class again but not without some hard work and heartache to get her there.

My advice to you... think long and hard about your decision and THOROUGHLY check the school out. Don't rely on the parents of kids currently attending, the school itself, or your pre-k experience. Go out and talk to parents of children who are no longer attending if you can find any. If you are in the Tri-Cities and would like to know the name of the school send me a response and I will let you know. However, I don't feel comfortable putting it out there for the whole world to see as it's not that I have hard feelings I just wish I had made a different decision to begin with.

Good luck!

N.