Preschool to Kindergarten

DON'T RUSH!!! I have a son with a late August bday and he turned 4 this year. Following the advice of many (and ignoring my gut feeling) I put him in a Pre-K class to prepare him for Kindergarten at age 6 - we intended for him to go to PreK for two years as the school told us that most late summer birthday kids do. I knew the first day of school that this was going to be WAY too much for him. My son is bright and he had no problem with the acacemics or social part of it but it was WAY too much for a kid who has been at home with me for all his life. After two months we hardly recognized our son - he was so tired and cranky all the time. His teacher raved about him and he loved school but we made the decision to withdraw him. Almost considered a 3-day preschool for the remainder of the year then decided that we would just keep him at home, do our library programs, and send him to a 3 day next year when he's 5 and to a half-day Kindergarten when he's 6. Parents are the best teachers a kid will ever have, and we only get them all to ourselves for a few short years. One day their friends will be more important to them than we are and they will have the pressure of school for many years to come. So I say DON'T RUSH IT!!! Good luck to you - and follow your gut - as a Mom it's almost always right!!!

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I did not wait to send my daughters to preschool, primarily because both my husband and I were in school, and needed to have the children in a school or daycare during the day. They started at a Montessori preschool a few months before they were 2 1/2 - which was definitely a little young. The school made an exception to take them at the beginning of the school year, and for a while we were discussing whether it would be best to put them in day care for a couple of months & start them back at school in January. They settled down, though, and did very well.
They had three years in the Montessori school and are currently in a full-day kindergarten. They are doing very well in school and I feel that their time in preschool helped them learn social skills, listening skills, and academic skills that will serve them well.
One thing I really liked about their preschool was that the classroom was a mix of ages. The school took children from ages 2 1/2 through 6 and was a preschool/kindergarten. All of the children were in one room, and the older children had some responsibility for the younger children. For example, when my daughters started, they were each assigned a 'buddy' to help them learn how the classroom worked. During my daughters' last year, they were the oldest kids in the class, which allowed them to take on more responsibility. I think the mix of ages was a definite strength of the school.

Of course, you know your child best. But you should know that there will likely be a mix of ages in any preschool you put your son in; he might be the youngest, but there very well could be other 'young' 3 year olds as well.

My son turned 3 on Sept 1 of 2007 - and I enrolled him in preschool. The year of school was good and bad, he was very shy and withdrawn and did not always participate with activities like singing, coloring, etc.

He turned 4 this fall, and we put him back in the 3's preschool class - I'd rather he be the oldest in the class than the youngest. He is much more involved this year and really enjoys school, now. Since he is born on the cutoff date, I'd really rather he continued being older than most of his classmates than the youngest. Last year we also had to contend with the older kids bullying our son (at that early of an age!).

The issues weren't so much academic as social.

Every child is different, but I consulted friends, family and school administrators, and we all came to the concensus that being older would help him succeed both academically and socially. We do plan to watch his development over the next year as we may change our minds - but that's where we are at as of right now.

Hope that helps - best of luck!

My daughter is in the same situation as your son. She turned 3 last July and started preschool this year and is the youngest in her class. I think it really depends on the child. Annika is very shy, but she's very smart too. And while she struggles sometimes with the social aspect, I think it is good for her. She is learning so much, more than I can teach her here with my other 2 around. She will be going to kindergarten right after she turns 5 and while I'm a little nervous about it, I think she will do just fine. I don't see it as a disadvantage, but more of an advantage. She will be learning at the same rate as kids older than her. I think you need to take cues from your son. If you don't think it's in his best interest, then wait. He won't be harmed because of it. Good luck with your decision!

My son's birthday is August 30th. And I did send him to pre-school basically the day after he turned 3. He went for 2 years of pre-school and then was in Kindergarten like a day after he turned 5. At that time, there was no such thing as Junior Kindergarten, which they now have at the school system here. I wish I would have had him go another year of pre-school, or 2 years of Kindergarten. He was never held back, but he had some problems in school like every other year. He is now is 6th grade. This year so far, last year when he was in 5th grade were great years. 4th Grade was okay, but the other grades, it varied. He would have times where he did okay, then days where he struggled. He's doing great now, but we struggled for a few years, so I guess it's all on how well he does with other things. He may just do really good, or he may struggle. Hope this helps a little...

As a music teacher, I see all the kids k-5. I can tell you that there is a HUGE difference between the kids who enter kindergarten as "just turned" 5 in the summer and those who have been 5 longer. I can also tell you that kids whose parents wait until they are six come in with soo much more of an advantage!! The summer five years olds (or worse-Sept.) are playing catch up the entire year of kindergarten. Some do catch up and some never do and it haunts them for a long time. Only send your child if you are SURE they can handle it. Can he say his alphabet AND recognize letters when they are not in order? Can he count AND recognize numbers out of order? Can he write his name confidently? I can't tell you how many kindergarteners panic when they are asked to write their name. They are asked to do this at least ten times a day. Can your child sit still and follow basic directions? Can your child hold going to the bathroom for a decent amount of time? Can he wipe himself? I know some of these sound silly but these are all crucial for a successful kindergarten year.

My son turned 3 in July and we are in preschool right now. He was born 2 months early, so heading to preschool now has been a great help. He is really starting to interact more, count, sing his ABC's and so on. I also was worried about him being ready, but he has adapted just fine. The place we are at is a daycare center, and he is on an IEP, but at the age of 3 all kiddos must move up to preschool. They separate them based on how much they know and by age. I just wanted you to know that the teachers are usually really good and help the studnets along. I will wait until my son is 6 as well to send him to kindergarten. I feel taht he just needed that extra year to make sure he was ready and not scared.
M.

Hi A.,
I sent my son to preschool for 3 years. He was a July birthday. It paid off forever, he has always been an honors student and is now studying at U of M. I never regretted holding him from kindergarten for another year. He would have been the youngest of a class of 55 boys. Needless to say his academics may have suffered, but emotionally and physically he would have been behind. Very difficult for a little guy to be first string when he was a year younger and smaller and less coordinated. Sports was huge for my son, and holding him back gave him so much more opportunity, it was good all the way around.

We put our {then} 3 year old into preschool more for the "social" aspect since at the time, he was our only child. And again at age 4 so he would be ready for Kindergarten this year. He turned 5 a month into school. The teachers at Kindergarten round up suggested that we wait a year to make sure he was emotionally ready, but our "little" guy was already as tall/er as some 1st graders and we were afraid that if we waited, he'd be a giant over the rest of his class. He's doing great even though most of his class are already 6 and he won't turn 6 until 1st grade. I'm glad we didn't wait. See how he is in preschool and then judge whether you want to wait til he's 6 for kindergarten. The social aspect really helps the kids learn how to interact appropiately {especially if you have an only child}. We're going to do the same for his little brother when he turns 3. Good luck!!! You'll make the right choice. A. J.

I don't have a child going through this experience, but my brother has an early August birthday and my parents waited until he was 6 to put him in Kindergarden. Now as an adult, he'd agree now that it was probably a good decision. Obviously, we'll never know for sure how it would have turned out if my parents would have sent him as a just turned 5 kindergardener, but I think my mom enjoyed the extra year at home with him as well. He's still a slower reader to this day, and I think that would have been a bigger struggle for him if he would have been playing catch up from the start. But each child is different. You're the best judge to know if your child is ready.

I think right now might be a little early to stress about this. Just keep an eye on his maturity and personality. you will never be ready to send him, my son was almost 6 when he started school but i still felt he wasn't ready but he did good and loved school. When your son does go to preschool keep in contact with his teachers and get their opinions. If you don't think he is ready for preschool next year skip it Both of my sons only did one year and were still ready for school.

wow-they sure like to fast track these kids now a days....school at 2 yrs.?????????....i myself waited until kids were 5 yrs an then went to kindergarden....they were just fine...but that was 22 yrs ago...i think kids should stay at home until at least 5 yrs.just amazes me...daycare was hard enuff.guess you need to decide what your most comfy with...good luck with that....

I'd say it all depends on your child. And you know best =) Does he seem ready to learn? Does he seem eager to play and interact with other children? Does he seem mature enough to take directions and sit and listen when it's time time to sit and listen, etc? Once you start him his teacher can also let you know whether 2 yrs would be beneficial to him or not. See how things go in the next year and then when it gets closer to Fall then decide.

My daughter's birthday is 8/29 and we did preschool at age3 for 2years and then did kindergarten barely being 5years and I regret it completely. She has always been the youngest, the shortest, and had to work her butt off to keep up with everyone. She's a very bright intelligent child but you can't speed up their maturity, her brain development and maturity is always almost a complete year behind everyone.

I held my boy an extra year because I didn't think he was quite mature enough. His birthday is July 28th. He has done just fine. He's now a 3rd grader and he's not even the oldest in the class. I found out there is quite a handful of kids that were born the same summer as he was. Don't sweat it. If you don't think he ready than give it another year. If after the first year of preschool you feel he's ready for kindergarten then put him in. Otherwise put him in another year of preschool. I think alot more parents are holding their kids an extra year if they are born in the summer.

My oldest son, now 12, has a July birthday. He did go to preschool right after he turned 3, but only two mornings a week. He ended up having three years of preschool and started kindergarten when he was 6. For his third year of preschool we put him in a preschool that was specifically designed for and limited to kids going to kindergarten the following year. We didn't decide on the kindergarten issue until the August after he turned 5, three weeks before he was to start kindergarten. I had him enrolled in both preschool and kindergarten to buy some time for the decision. All of this worked out very well for us and was the right decision for him. However, every child is different. I would wait to make the kindergarten decision. Some kids are really ready and others aren't, regardless of their birthdays. Our son was ready academically, but not emotionally or socially. I would make the preschool decision right now based on whether you think he will be ready for that and would benefit from it. Our son wasn't potty trained when he started preschool so we chose one that didn't require it. Good luck and feel free to contact me if you have questions.

I didn't read any of the other responses, but my first thought is that kids are only KIDS for a short time... school occupies MOST of our lives and why not let him and you enjoy his little years as much as possible.

My daughter JUST started Pre-K and she turned 5 the end of September, she will be there for 1 year and start kindergarten next year. The class she's in has 3 year old in it too and the attention span they don't have is amazing... I think looking into a play group a couple times a week would be much more beneficial for you both than to plop him in a preschool before he needs to.

Just my thoughts.... don't rush :o)

My son's birthday is mid-July. He just turned 4 this year. The experience I had was last year he was nowhere near fully potty-trained so I did not put him in preschool at 3 but found a parents morning out program 1 day a week that did not require potty training. He wasn't fully trained until this summer. This year he is in a preschool class that is mixed ages 3-5 and only 2 mornings a week. This way if he is not ready for kindergarten next fall he can go to the 3 or 4 day a week program. I have decided to not make a decision about kindergarten until late summer. Which if you are going with public school is not an issue. It is hard to ignore all the advice but it is important to do what you feel is best for your child and take the advice of experts(his preschool teachers, the person who screens him at 3, etc.) I have a daughter with a July birthday and she started at 5 and is now 13 and is doing well. I would wait and see and be sure to get hime involved in other classes maybe at church, a local YMCA, ECFE classes or whatever where it is shorter amounts of time and maybe with some seperation. Time really will tell. My son has changed so much in the last 6 months so if you would have asked me about kindergarten this spring I would've said I would wait but now I think he might be ready. We'll see. Good luck with your decision.

We have a daughter that turned 3 on Sept. 19th. We decided that we will send her to preschool when she will be almost 4 and then more than likely send her to kindergarten when she is almost 6. The thing about preschool is that they don't have to be there so if after a year of preschool we feel she is ready for kindergarten we can move her on to that. I really don't see that happening though, in general I would rather have her be one of the oldest in her class as opposed to youngest, not only for when she starts school but as she moves on to middle school and high school.

The decision to send them to Kindergarten at 5 or 6 really depends on their development level. There's no reason he has to go to preschool, although it's good practice and I sent my kids. If you want to send him to preschool, I would recommend waiting until he's 4, and after that year you can get a better idea of how he would fare in Kindergarten. Then, if he's ready, great, but if he needs another year you can decide at that time. The preschool teachers should be a very good judge of his readiness.

My older daughter is one of the oldest in her class (early fall bday) but because she is a quick learner she was VERY bored in Kindergarten. My younger girl turned 5 in June and went to Kindergarten that same fall and is doing just fine. So you can't only judge by birthdate, you have to look at their development level. Good luck! Remember you don't have to decide everything now! :)

I didn't put my first in preschool until she was 4 and I'm doing the same thing with my 2nd. She turned 3 the beginning of July, but I'm not putting her in preschool until next fall ('09). My oldest is 5 (July 2nd) and she's in kindergarten this year. She's one of the youngest, but she's doing everything she should be for her age/grade. Our children are going to be in school for 13 years just K-12, so I don't see putting them in preschool for more than a year. The main reason I'm having my 2nd go to preschool is so she gets more used to a school setting than at home where we're not as structured as school and also get her somewhat prepared for all day/every day kindergarten.
Hope this helps some!

My youngest son was born in June and we waited until he was 5 to send him to preschool then kindergarten at 6 and I don't regret it. It does mean that they are 18 when they graduate and that means they can legally move out of the house for the last year of school if they desire to do so. There were 3 or 4 kids born around the time my son was that year and all of us kept our kids out until they were 6 year old for kindergarten. I always felt it was better to be one of the oldest kids in class rather then one of the youngest, it isn't as much of a struggle keeping up when they are young. Once they get to Junior and Senior High, there isn't much difference but in Grade school a year can make a world of difference.

Hi A.,
My son's birthday was the end of October. In Michigan that meant he could still start kindergarten (cut off is Dec 1). When i was pregnant with him and subbing in 5 different districts it was a big topic of discussion at lunch. I had decided by the time he was born that we would not start him in kindergarten at the time when the state said he could. After many discussions with many other teachers then general concensus was to wait. One teacher that i spoke with said that her feeling was that if the birthday was after May then they should just wait (esp. for a boy).

We moved to the UP of michigan a week after my son turned 4. We started at a private preschool with a multi-age preschool (kids 3-5). The preschool program there is for 2years typically. He completed his first year and i also took him to kindergarten round-up (we thought about putting him in the prep kindergarten through the school district). He would not leave my side at the round-up when he was supposed to go with the teacher for testing. This confirmed to me that he was not emotionally ready to move into kindergarten.
We kept him at the private preschool for the second year (he turned 5 a month after the year started.) He did great that year and was a very confidant student that year---helping the younger with activities, etc.
He started kindergarten and turned 6. He is a very confidant student and a leader in his class. I think it was the best thing for him. I think he is much better off being an 'older' student in the class. I can't imagine him in class with kids 10 months older than him. It seems to have turned him into a leader in his class (we have a very small district...there are 16 in his class!)
My daughter's birthday is in April and she is on track to start kindergarten in the fall. This is her second year of preschool.
Hope this helps. Good luck in your decision.

My oldest has a June birthday, and he started preschool the year he turned 3... two mornings a week and only because I had a new baby and he needed something of his own. He went for 3mos and then went to a preschool program just for kids entering kindergarten the next year. He started Kindergarten at 5 (again he has a June birthday, so he turned 5 in June and started K in September) and I've never regretted that choice. He's 6 now and in 1st grade, he's excelling in every area, enjoys school, and is doing wonderful.

My youngest has a September birthday, so we won't have a choice but to hold him back a year. He just turned 3 in September ,and I don't feel he needs any preschool, however on Friday mornings we do go to the Community center for ABC/123 classes, and he enjoys that .Its just enough to keep him entertained but not pushing anything on him. Next year I'll consider a preschool program when he's 4, because he'll be in school readiness the year he turns 5, and that will be plenty.

Go with your gut... but really preschool is not required at age 3. I would wait for preschool until he's 4, then send him to Kindergarten the next year at 5... if you feel he's ready. Otherwise, let him enjoy next year as a 3yr old relaxing and playing. He'll have the next 15+ yrs in school!

I have 2 sons with summer birthdays, June and Aug. We decided to hold them back for a few reasons. They both started kindergarten after their 6th birthdays. They are both one of the oldest kids in their classes. I discussed the issue with several people and decided the best for our family was to hold them back. I know people that have sent their kids early, I don't comment, they did what they felt was the best for their family.

My reasons...

A kindergarten teacher said her experience with early birthday kids was there are some that are sent early and regret it, there are some that are sent early and don't regret it. BUT she's never had a parent hold their child back and regret it.

My family physician said kids (especially boys) may be ready when they just turn 5, but you will see a difference when they all start hitting puberty.

A social worker or some school aid person was surprised when I told her my son was waiting another year for school, until after his 6th birthday. She was very rude and stated that after 2 or 3 years you couldn't tell any difference from the kids that had early birthdays vs. those that had later birthdays. I didn't say anything to the lady at the time but my initial thoughts were "so why would I want my child to start out the first 2 or 3 years of school behind???"

I also have a daughter with a May birthday. I will be sending her to kindergarten the fall after her 5th birthday. I could have sent my 'June' birthday early, but my sons are 2 years apart in age, I wanted them to be 2 years apart in school. Don't know if that makes sense or not, but that is what we choose to do.

What it comes down to is you have to do what you feel is best for your child and family. Once you make your decision, stick with it, don't second guess yourself asking should we have done this?? Or should we have done that??

Good Luck!
P. Mom to 3 (9, 7, 3)
1st time Gestational Surrogate due Jan 09!

Don't worry about that yet! We don't need to do that (thankfully) in our part of the country. I know plenty of people who registered in the fall that they wanted their child to go! You might not get the exact class or time you want, but you can still get in. "early" registration at our preschool is when they first allow it - late winter prior to the next school year. And that is only so you can get your preferred class time. We go to a fantastic preschool in Golden Valley. Its been around for over 40 years, has a great reputation, great teachers and a couple hundred students. I don't know where you live, but if you are anywhere near, consider Calvary Lutheran Pre-K in Golden Valley. But not until you want to go. They have classes for 2 year olds, but most people start at 3 or 4. Good luck!

We have 5 children. With our 1st 2 we put them in preschool at 3 and then Kindergarten at 5. i WISH I had waited one more year with our son though. Boys IN GENERAL, NOT ALWAYS, could use that extra year to mature emotionaly.
Our next 3 we waited until 4 to do preschool & then did kindergarten at 6. I'm SOOOOOO glad we did!! made a HUGE difference!!
Also with your son being a July baby, he will be a very young kindergartener. So sending him at 5 will be tough for him being so young. You're doing right by thinking it through now.

GOOD LUCK!

My son is 5 and he has gone to preschool since 3 and this year will be his last year then go to Kindergarten when he is 6 cause his b-day is in Aug. From what I have been told and researched boys do better waiting the extra time. It helps them in the long run. Hope this helps!

If I were you I'd wait until 4 for preschool. Before you know it he'll be gone all day long and you'll wish you would've kept him home while he was little to have that extra time.
About K. My son turned 5 in August and I would not have dreamed of holding him back. 2 years of K is better than 2 years of preschool any day.
I cyber school my kids through Connections Academy and they use the Calvert curriculum. My son will probably be done with K by January because he's doing so well. Age has nothing to do with ability. You have do what is right for your child but don't hold him back just because of his age.
Best Wishes,
J.
Homeschooling Mom to 4.

I was in the same boat 1 year ago. My son is an early August birthday. I stay at home with my son and around January when he was 2.5, despite being in ECFE classes, I started feeling like he needed more than just me. Like he needed more stimulation/chalenge than I provided. So I went ahead and registered him for preschool 2 mornings a week. In August he only just started potty training! I ended up sendning him to preschool not knowing what would happen. He had control of his urine, but still will not poop in the potty. School did not want them wearing pull-ups. He understood he could not go poop at school unless it was in the toilet, or he could not go back to school. So far it is Novemeber we have not had an accident but he LOVES preschool and is thriving.

We are preparing in our mind to hold him for kindergarten until he is 6, but will just wait and see wait and see before we make the final decision. Most teachers we talk to recommend holding them back. What often occurs if they seem ready to enter Kindergarton at 5, the problems may not arrive until Jr. High. I already can see that my son, although bright, tends to be immature for his age. If this trend continues, we'll probably hold him. My only concern is that I don't want him to end up bored in school.

Don't worry about things too much. I feel like from February when we signed him up, until September when he started preschool, I worried nonstop. It all is working out great and I wish I had not made such a big deal of things. Good luck!

My daughter is in the exact same boat. She also turned two this past July. I've been struggling w/ this decision as well. At this point, I've decided to wait until she turns 4 to send her to pre-school and then I will send her for 2 years and start her in kindergarten at 6. My viewpoint is simple....why wouldn't you give your child a head's up on everyone else versus sending them almost a year younger than their classmates. My daughter is extremely smart (speaks in full sentences and grasps concepts extremely quickly) but I feel if I send her a full year younger than everyone else she will be constantly struggling to keep up (only due to her age and not her intelligence).

I also sent my just 3 year old (Aug 2) to preschool last year with much hesitation. He is now 4 and in his 2nd year of preschool and still debating to send him to kindergarden next fall at just turning 5. That is a hard one. My son is also the middle child and tends to be a little more immature and and more needy. You know your child. Some just wait one more year for two years of preschool so he is older 6 at kindergarden. Some send there just 3 year old and see how it goes. It could help him mature and learn to play with other kids and take direction from teachers. If you think you will send him to kindergarden at 5 then send him if not, maybe hold him one more year. It is definitely a parent call on knowing your child. Alot can happen in two years. You may be surprised!

I will have to make this decision about my son born in July. I had an August birthday and was glad to be one of the youngest in my class. I was usually the tallest girl in my class, which was bad at the beginning to date stage when all the boys were shorter. If I had waited a year it would have been even worse. Being a tall boy wouldn't pose any such problems though. I didn't have any problem with academics and graduated in the top 10 in my class. The only issue I can point to in retrospect is that I was the last to hit puberty, and I really couldn't relate when my friends went boy crazy and I still thought boys were stupid.

My brother has a September birthday and was bored all through school. He would have been more challenged if he could have started a year earlier. It's a very individual and difficult decision. As your son matures it will become clearer what the right choice will be for him.

My son is an August birthday so we had a similar choice to make. We did 2 years of preschool and he is now in Kindergarten at age 5. The difficulty in starting preschool so close to his 3rd birthday was that he was slow to potty learn. So when you choose a preschool be sure to ask about their policy as it varies a lot. The first year of preschool we chose our local ECFE preschool because one of the 2 days, a parent stays with the child for half of class. This was a nicer transition to a school setting for him (and for me). It allowed me the chance to know how the class was structured and understand better how he functioned with the other kids. The second year of preschool I chose based on what I felt he needed to best prepare for K. In our case he needed a lot of work on group social skills and not academics. So chose Dodge Nature Preschool where the teachers were amazing in terms of working on his ability to communicate with his peers. Preschool was helpful to us in that we were able to realize our son had more difficulties in group settings than we had realized and turned out to have sensory processing disorder and some fine motor delays. Because of the support we received from the school, we were able to seek a referral for OT sessions that helped my son a lot and gave me information that has been extremely valuable in helping him navigate school from a sensory perspective.

For the start of K, we were truly on the fence until Sept. 1. I signed him up for preschool and for K because we were not positive he was ready for K (he was academically very strong and still a bit shaky in the social-emotional arena). We decided on a full day K so it was going to be a big adjustment. My son wanted to attend K but he also suggested that he have a chance to try out and practice the all day schedule. So we signed him up for 2 weeks of summer school at Mounds Park Academy because they had some great programs and it was all day. Both he and I learned a lot from that experience and we both came out of it better prepared for the K transition.

He started K this September and fortunately his K class has a number of summer birthdays. I have volunteered a lot in his class and to be truthful he sits and pays attention better than most of the class including a bunch of boys who just turned 6. We certainly feel we made the right decision.

Given that, everyone's child is different and I think you will probably spend a lot of time thinking about it. The thing I found hardest was everyone telling me, "Well he is a boy so you should just wait until he is 6 for K." I found this blanket statement to be ridiculously over simplified and not necessarily true. Most people based their advice on anecdotal evidence rather than anything scientific. I found a wonderful article that was researched based, that helped me strengthen my argument for considering K at age 5. Here is the link: http://journal.naeyc.org/btj/200309/DelayingKEntry.pdf

Good luck in your decision. I think whatever you decide it going to be positive for your son because you are giving it careful thought already and are clearly a supportive parent who will give him what he needs.