I have 3 kids. Alexander and Lauren who are a year old. And Kiki who is 12 and 10 months. I am now pregnant again. Lauren and Alexander won't even understand what's going on so they're fine. But if I tell Kiki I don't know what she will do. My husband knows and is telling me to tell her before it's too noticeable and she finds out I didn't tell her. Any advice?
She has been through this before and she will be exited for me, but I don't know if she wants three siblings that are way younger than her. THANX FOR THE HELP!!!! I
Your daughter will find out eventually, right? I agree with your husband. Be honest and open with her (this is good modeling for her, too, so that hopefully she keeps the lines of communication open with you). What are you afraid of? How did she react when you told her you were having your other two? She's been through this before, so she'll be fine.
well you're going to have tell her some time and if you don't she will feel betrayed.
Go ahead and tell her
As far as mother/daughter bonding goes she should have been one of the first you pulled aside to give the great news to. That would make her feel the love and joy that you are feeling. When a daughter knows that mom loves her so much that she's the first person she comes to with news it makes them feel good. I know my mom always calls me first thing when stuff happens, it's always been that way.
My 13 year old daughter would be thrilled to have a new baby in the house! Wish I could make one for her, sigh.
She had to settle for a puppy!
Congratulations on your big beautiful family!!
(And to answer the question, I agree with your husband, tell her now. In a wonderful positive way!!)
That would be a great mother/daughter bonding piece. She can help you shop for maternity clothes, decorate the room, and pick out the baby stuff. Let her be your friend and not just your daughter.
Why wouldnt you tell her? What I would do is make sure you dont get all self centered with your pregnancy and make her miserable with it, she is at a delicate age and needs lots of tlc and attention from mom right now, so dont take your focus off of her. I'd just let her know she's getting ready to have another bro or sis and that you hope he/she turns out to be as great as you are Kiki.
With two babies and a teen, you need to keep your pregnancy on low profile otherwise everyone involved will get lost in the suffle, even hubby. I'm only saying this because it sounds like you think there are going to be adverse reactions and not a happy big sis who may already feel left out. Is this your second marriage and Kiki has a different dad? If that is the case, you need to help her get through all of this. Being 12 in a perfect family environment is hard enough.... they are so sensitive at this age to peer pressure, and require tons of encouragement and attaboys from both parents to keep their self esteem at a good level.
Tell her. If she loves your twins she'll be happy with the new baby too.
Later on in life she will be so glad to have a big family. The years disappear once you are grown up.
I hope you have an easy pregnancy in spite of having so many duties to the small children you already have. Remember to nap when they do. You will need all the rest you can get.
