58 answers

Pre-teen Girl

****THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR RESPONSES****
MY ISSUE IS LETTING HER GROW UP. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I HAVE HAD TO "ALLOW" SOMETHING TO TAKE PLACE THAT LETS HER MOVE ON INTO HER WOMANHOOD. SHE HAS STARTED TO DEVELOP BREAST, BUT THAT ALONG WITH HER PERIOD IS SOMETHING I CANT CONTROL OR STOP. I KNOW;TO MANY, IT SEEMS LIKE NO BIG DEAL, BUT MAN! THIS RANKS UP THERE WITH ALLOWING OPPOSITE SEX PHONE CALLS-WHICH WILL NOT HAPPEN FOR A WHILE!

THIS WEEKEND WE WILL HAVE A MOTHER DAUGHTER SPA DAY!

My oldest daughter is 11. Will be 12 later this year. She has asked to shave her legs. I'm not sure. She is very hairy on her legs, but it is blonde.

When is an appropriate time/age to shave?

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

Hi L.,

I can relate to what you are going through. My daughter is 11 and will be 12 in August. She ask me back in the winter and I hesitated at first but all of her friends were doing it, so I let her shave her legs. That is all for now though. She is blossoming quite well now, but has not started her period yet and I am not looking forward to that!!!

my advice, is let her shave her legs, and even underarms. she is growing up Mom. and the main thing, she respects you. and did ASK first. i hope this helps.

Trust me, as a mother of a 13 year old girl, there are much worse things that will come about. If being hairy makes her self conscience let her shave. It's better to let her do it and keep her self-esteem up than for the other kids to make fun of her and her resent you.

More Answers

L., as a mother of two girls myself, I understand your dilemma. We don't want them to grow up too fast & we know what a job it is to shave! It's a big responsibility & something she'll have to continue the rest of her life, so why not wait? That was my thinking anyway. But at age 12, most girls do shave & when I realized that my daughter was ashamed of her leg hair enough to not wear shorts, I felt it was time for her to learn to shave. We made a fun event out of it & went to gether to buy her a cute razor, some foam, and some nice lotion. Then we sat on the side of the tub and I shaved one leg to show her how. It was a sweet & memorable little 'event' and I've never regretted it. She only has to shave once a week, so it's not nearly as big a deal as I'd thought it would be.
God bless. Whatever you decide, she will be ok.
J. B.

1 mom found this helpful

L.,

My heart feels for you as the mother of three girls 17,13 and 12,I have been there done that and bought the shirt. I had a different age with all three my oldest always asked what happened to the mother SHE had as a pre-teen( I guess I was a little hard on her),But what I did learn was to pick my battles carefully. I waited until the younger ones were starting to get more "mature" and when I noticed underarm hair I knew it was time.

So each girl got a one on one session with mom on how to shave your legs safely and actually it turned out to be a great bonding time for us. I guess since they felt more "grown up" they talked to me about things they had been wondering about and feelings they were having. Iam so glad I had that time to learn what was really going on in their lives.
So my advice is grab a razor, shaving cream, and your daughter and enjoy the time you might be surprised,I sure was.

My daughter started younger, and so did I. The thing that stands out to me is that she asked first and didn't just start on her own. That says a lot for her and for her relationship with you. Personally, I'd let her. Just explain that once she starts, she'll have to continue on a routine basis.

This is a daily conversation in my house. I have a 12,10, and 4 year old girls (a 2 year old boy) and both the 12 and 10 year old ask daily about shaving. It is amazing to me how many girls are already shaving. I have 2 blondies, but the 10 year old is very hairy. The rule in my house is not until they "start". That way it is out of my hands. I think that shaving is the beginning of womenhood.

That is about the age I started shaving my legs. I sliced my skin pretty bad (still have the scar 'til this day) because I snuck to do it. Everyone was telling me I was too young, but I had to take the gorilla out of me one way or another.

Good luck and God Bless

I think she should be able to shave her legs especially if her legs are hairy(like you say) She probable has gym class and is going to be wearing shorts this summer she would want to shave her legs. She probable feels like she would be made fun of. Also probable other girls her age are shaving there legs and she might be embarrassed b/c she hasn't shaved her legs. I know I wasn't able to shave my legs and I was made fun of so I just shaved my legs w/ out asking. She is growing up and I see nothing wrong w/ shaving legs. And if other people think that she shouldn't shave her legs or say she's too young well we are in 2008 and we aren't back in the days.

my advice, is let her shave her legs, and even underarms. she is growing up Mom. and the main thing, she respects you. and did ASK first. i hope this helps.

I think she is old enough, mosy kids start about 9 or 10. My niece started about 9 because of very hairy legs. If she is getting made fun of for it, then I would let her for sure. Kids are very cruel. I would check on that, that might be why she wants to so bad. My 7 yr old already want to but she has got at least 3 years to go. Good Luvk

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