Pre-School Help Is It to Early?

H.,
First let me commend you for taking care of your god children. You are very special. Second let me tell you as a veteran mom of six (my oldest is 28) that it really doesn't matter if you put your daughter in preschool or if you wait. what matters is two things. the first is that you do what you think is right, not what everyone says. the second is that you oversee her education which you need to know began before birth. If you choose preschool or not, sit with her a few minutes every day and show her colors, and animals, and numbers, letters really anything from books. Take her out side to explore. Show her flowers and bugs and birds. Show her the sun and the moon. Right now is the time to teach your daughter that learning is fun.At bedtime, read to her from a story book. also do not underestimate the power of reading from the Bible. She doesn't need to understand, she just needs to hear and see you reading so that she can learn how fun and beneficial it is.
The reason that you should do what you think is right is because you and your husband are the ones responsible for her, and also because one of the best things I have learned is that children don't care if we are perfect or if we make mistakes, they only care if we care. They feel loved and secure when parents are very hands on. It sounds as though you are. Keep doing a great job!
R.

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H., I know I am quite late answering your question...but here is my two cents worth...

Do what you feel is right, and don't let others pressure you into anything.
My daughter at 3 1/2 started going 3 days a week (for 2 1/2 hrs) to Play Pals a play activity - social time through Deerfield Beach recreation center. She loves it. they have themes, and circle time, and activities.
Young children learn through play.
We started the program because she was gettting bored at home, even though we do alot of playdates, and learning at home. I didn't place her in a preschool as she is very advanced and I didn't feel it was necessary.
she will be starting pre-k in August and is excited and ready. ( I of course am suffering separation anxiety, LOL ) - I am just glad it is a half day program.

Best of luck to you! You have an option as you are a SAHM... so just go with your gut feeling. I think your daughter will let you know when she needs more.

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It depends on what your need are. For instance if you've thought about going to work at some point you may want to get her adjust to the school stting gradually. There are programs like Head start which starts at 3 y.o. It is free. For half days a few days a week you'll have to pay a private school/day care center. At four Florida has VPK (voluntary Pre-Kindergarten) which is free and at most elementery schools and some day care centers.

If you love staying home and don't need to go out in to the work place. STAY HOME!! I wish I could. I am a single mom and I actually stayed home when my son (now 4) was born. At that time my daughter was starting Kindergarten. By the time she was in first grade I loved being out of the business of working everyday and the freedom to spend time with my little ones that I took her out of public school and homeschooled her for 3 years. I loved it. Most people thought I was crazy (How could I stand to be around them ALL DAY EVEYDAY) but I know that I could do it and we would all love it.

There are plenty of play groups out there that you can get involved in if you are worried about her interacting with other kids. You can even check out homeschooling support groups just becasue most of the parents involved have little ones that they also bring along.

SO again, it all depends on what you want to do - NOT what family members think. SOme moms put their children in day care a few hours a week just so they can clean the house without the Un-people (all kids) un- doing all your hard work.

SO what do you plan on doing in the near future? Staying home, working, hanging out at the spa/mall/gym a couple of days a week, going to school? Look at what you can realistically handle as far a s time & patience and also what you and your husband can afford. Don't do it because people want you to. You -NOt them - will have to deal with how your decision will affected you home life. So pray about it, ask others advice but ultimately you and your husband should be the ones that make the final decision.

I pray that God gives you the wisdom and stregth to follow His will for your family!

In Christ,
S.

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H.,
You shouldn't feel that you have to put your daughter into preschool if you don't want to. There are pros and cons to it. I have a son in preschool, and he likes it most of the time. But they give him homework, which is a pain to get a four year to do. My older son never went to preschool and he keeps up just fine with his first grade class. I don't think you should push your daughter into learning in a structured environment until you have to. Children are great at learning on their own if you give them access to it. If she already interacts with lots of kids then you don't have to worry about socialization and strengthening her immune system.

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I don't think preschool is necessary, but I think it does help to have your child in a group activity before kindergarten. I think that children learn more at this age through free, unstructured playtime. After all, they have their whole lives to spend in structured school settings!

One of my favorite books on this is Einstein Never Used Flashcards. It's a good reminder of how children are innately learning beings, and all we have to do as parents is to foster that love of learning.

That said, my three year old has an arts & crafts class once a week, and a gymnastics class also once a week at our local YMCA. It's great for me too - I drop my 9 mo old off at Child Watch, he goes to class, and I do yoga, workout, or head to the climbing wall. Or sometimes I just read a book or meet a friend for coffee.

You could also try your local library. They usually have free storytimes for little ones, organized by age group. Moms attend too, but they sing songs, read, and play games, sometimes do crafts. They learn about sitting together in circle time, doing group activities, etc.

Follow your instinct - and don't listen to your family!

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Hi H., I know exactly what your going through.... My husband's family tried to push me towards the whole "educate early" thing too!!! You need to do what feels right for you!!! If your child is developing fine at home with you, than leave it alone...Stay home with that child as long as you can...Before you know it, she'll be all grown up!!! Do what you feel is right!!!

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keep her home as long as you can. She'll be in school for the rest of her life. NOW is your only chance to have her to yourself to make the bonds that will hopefully last a life time.
Trust your instincts.

1 mom found this helpful

Hey H., I know this response is SUPER late, but I just now read your request. Our daughter is an only child and I stayed home with her for the first two years before beginning to work from home. I turned everything into a teaching or learning opportunity. By 2 yrs old she knew her alphabet, several songs and games, her colors, her shapes, had an EXTENSIVE vocabulary, counted to 40 in English and knew several words and numbers in Spanish.
(I am American but bi-lingual).

Just before she was 2 years old, I saw signs that she needed MORE interaction with other children than she was getting through mommy and me, playdates, etc. in that she wasn't grasping concepts like sharing and taking turns, etc. I thought and prayed about it long and hard and after much research and many "visits" did place her in a private faith-based school called Gloria Dei Lutheran Academy, which has a very good reputation. (I couldn't believe how many parents that I met in parks and on playgrounds had sent their children there and had GREAT THINGS to say about it!

At the time, the youngest children they had a program for were 2 year olds. She was in the "CDC", or "Child Development Center" which is much more than "day-care", it is "curriculum based" and TONS of fun for the kids. I could NOT believe how much they do with them. I was VERY reluctant, and yes, I did cry all the way home the first 2 days. I realized that it wasn't that SHE wasn't ready, it was that "I" wasn't ready. She was already progressing and learning well at home but she absolutely BLOSSOMED in that program. I feel NOW that it was one of the best decisions that I made.

She was in that school at 2 in the CDC, then for Pre-K3 and Pre-K4. The teachers she had were ALL awesome! In fact, we go back every few months to "visit" them because SHE says she misses them and asks if we can go back and see Ms. Val, Ms. Harber, and Mrs. Sethman often. She was also in the FREE VPK program and attended (during the summer)at Embassy Creek. I cannot say enough GREAT things about the VPK program. It is jam packed with learning and gets them off to an AWESOME start preparing them for Kindergarten.

I DO agree completely with what others have said about going with your gut and that YOU know what is best for your child. I also like the concept of home-schooling and have done quite a bit of research on that as well. (My sister-in-law home schools twin 13 years olds and her 7 year old).

Just as an update, I am not a "proponent" of the gifted program, but, Briana's Kindergarden teacher said she showed signs of gifted and suggested that we may want to have her evaluated at no cost to us. She was evaluated for the gifted program at the end of Kindergarden. Anything over 100 is "high schieving" and 130 begins "gifted". She scored 122. She also scored high on her SAT and VERY high in the area of reading. We read ALL THE TIME! I truly believe that my early "teaching" coupled with her early exposure to a structured learning environment has all contributed.

I just thought I'd add my personal experience since it was different from most of the replies. Would love to receive an update on what you decided and how it went for you. I love this site and the fact that we can all share and learn from one another. All the best to you and your family! - S. -

hello, i just put my twin girls that are 2 in kinder care over in merritt island. everyone told me that it would take a couple of weeks to see a real difference in them because they are really developmentally delayed. well, needless to say, 3 days into school, katrina was holding my hand and walking to the car and not running off. they are both letting us put hair ties in their hair and even starting to not want their sippy cups. plus it has given me a chance to join planet fitness as well as go back to school to start myslef on a path to being a family law attorney for those that are financially straped. it is not turning your back on them and trust me, they are way more ready then you think they are. plus bedtime is a ton easier and they laugh sooooo mcuh more. good luck and enjoy the first few days by taking a couple naps in peace. B. sahm of 10,3,2,2 cocoa

It's not too early, but as another Mom stated, you can work with her at home. At three, she should be working on shapes, colors, and counting. And read to her every day!
Many preschools have 'summer camp' which will be starting at the end of this school year. You could always wait until the new school year (Aug/Sept) and then consider putting her in then. She will be a little over 3 1/2 and should really be ready to absorb what she will learn in preschool. Keep in mind also, that she will not enter kindergarten until she's 5, which means for her that she will be 5 3/4 years old. You have plenty of time!
I can recommend the Montessori method of teaching. It's very hands on and my son has done very well in that environment.
Good Luck!

Hello H., it is best that you child does interact with other children, but you've stated that she already does. As far as her education, you can teach her all of those things at home. The earlier they learn, the easier it'll be for them later on. I work at home as a childcare provider and love to see my two children play with other children. They have learned so much, because I believe that it's never too late for a child to start learning. My daughter (1 1/2 yrs old)knows all of her ABC AND their sound. She also knows her numbers, shapes, colors and more. My son (3 yrs old) is starting to read and knows all that my daughter knows in both English and Spanish. I don't force them to learn at all. I make it fun and know, they just LOVE to learn. If you need any advice, let me know, because KNOWLEDGE IS POWER. Plus the Education Level in Florida isn't the best. We are thinking baout moving up north due to this. Best wishes and yes, it's a great time for your child to work on her preschool activities. You can do it at home.

Take care.
L.

Hello
Sorry I am late answering. I justed joined this website tonight.
I have three year olds (also born in Jan.)My son goes to preschool and he absolutely loves it.
Only you know your daughter and will know when she is ready. However, kids at this age love to learn. They get proud and excited of themselves when they learn something new.

We should get our kids together at a park sometime.

I would definitely consider putting your child in daycare/preschool by age 4. I truly believe exactly what your family members are saying. And I just read it in the parents magazine, that it does really help the child adjust to going to kindergarten and learning to get along and learn with other children. My son is about 1.5 years old, and I will consider taking him at age 3 part time. But we'll see what is going on in our lives at that time and make decision. Good luck on whatever you decide.

B. R

My daughter is not quite 2 years old yet. I have been bringing her to 2 and you classes at one of our local Church Pre-Schools. Next year she'll be going 2 days a week by herself for 3 hrs. The 2 and you program is where you get to go with your child one day a week for 3 hrs. It gets them ready to go by themselves. I'm a SAHM so I wouldn't ever need her to go to daycare plus it's so expensive. In Pre-school they are learning to be around other kids, shareing, how to clean-up, manners, and so much more. It gets her ready for full time kindergarden and since next yr she'll be going 2 days for 3 hrs I'll have time to work on my Premier Jewelry business and housework.

Hi there - my son is 3 as well (in January too) and he is in full time day care and LOVES it. His language skills, his math skills and his social skills are by far better than most 3 year old- a testament to the lady taking care of him as well as the benefits of it all! Not every child is the same, not every child will react the same, but he blossomed under it. Every afternoon he tells me what he learned, shows me the new things he has done and I am really proud when i see him interact with other kids. So, perhaps a couple of half days at day care would help your daughter build the independance and make friends that she sees and looks forward to playing with. Like I said, every child is different and you as her Mom will know her best. I can only speak of my success with it.
Good Luck!

Just keep her at home. When and if you feel comfortable with it then go for it. But listen to your gut instinct, not what everyone else says.

totally trust yourself, i was pressured into the same thing and i had my son in preschool for 2 months and relized that he was sick almost a whole month out of the 2. i eventually took him out and we were both fine. I had so many activities as it was for him and my son is now in kindergaden and doing fine with relating and playing well with other children. You can alway's put her in preschool at anytime when you want to. This is the best year's before there off to school for good so enjoy it with your daughter and If she does end up going to preschool it will be your decision and not your family's
Your the mommy and you know what's best for you and your family
Good luck

Dear H. G,

I agree with your family. Put your daughter in pre-school. I did with my twins who turned 3 and it was the BEST decision I could of made for them. They are now 15 and more mature then most of their friends who are 15. Put her in the 5 day program and pick her up at 1 if you can. She will first be unhappy, but be persistent. It will be hard for both of you. In a week or 2 she will adjust and YOU will be HAPPY you made the decision to put her in pre-school.

Let me know what you decide.

Best of Luck!!!!

G. H.

Since every child is different your best bet would be to give it a try. My son is in kindergarten now and he is doing wonderful. I think it is in part because he got the early start in preschool. He does better socially than other kids and also in the class. By the time he started Kindergarten he already knew how to count to 50, knew all the shapes and colors, knew how to tell time, knew his alphabet, and knew how to write his name. It is very important to give your kids any headstart you can give them. The most important foundation he got has been in reading. He loves to read and that is so important to me because that is going to make his road to education much easier. So, even if you try preschool and you decide she is not ready for it you should always read to her and try learning activities, you dont know how important it will be for her in the long run.

Actually to me it ain't a bad idea, but the option is totally up to you. My son is 3 years old and everyone is telling me that too.

I put my kids in daycare in November. They are 2 years old. It was the best thing I could have ever done for them. Both of their speech has improved. They've gotten so smart!!! They have friends now (I didn't know many other parents and I work during the day, so it was hard to meet any). Before, they just had a babysitter. Now, they go to school and they love it.
I think you should go for it. Put her in daycare. She'll love it!

Never mind what everyone else says. Stick to your thoughts. You know her better than anyone.

H.-It is definitely NOT too early for your daughter to start pre-school or a part time day care. It will help her develop social skills with her peers. I have seen many children that stay at home until it is time to start school and they always seem to have a harder time that first year. Just remember, it is your choice and whatever you choose will be the best for your own daughter. Some people do not have the option whether or not to put their children in pre-school or day care because they have to work and have no choice---so, if you want to keep her home to enjoy her before she starts school, then do it---in the end, she is yours to raise and encourage (you can always invite freiends over for her to interact with too). Good luck!!!

Hi H.

I am really encouraged about your decision and want to applaud your decision. The pressure from people around you can be intense.

I knew before my son was born that I wanted to not only not put him in day care, but wanted to homeschool him. So you can imagine the responses I had. People who don't homeschool have many misconceptions about the same things you were discussing. My son had plenty of interaction with our friends who had children of the same age and now is 12. We still homeschool, but I've gotten over that pressure that people apply. I understand their well intentions, but you have to listen to what God wants you to do, what is best for your child.

By the way, if your family would like to shop at a discount, we have a consignment shop that trades clothing and stuff, we have a great inventory and a great sale going on. It's a great way to save money for other important things.
God bless

D.

Hey girl, you can always enroll your daughter and explain to the pre-school/daycare center that it may be temporary. Give it 2-4 weeks or more. If you dont think your daughters is getting much out of it, or if she seems unhappy, then take her out. She may end up surprising you, maybe she will like it and get a lot out of it.....

Honestly. Take their advice. Socialization in group settings on a consistant basis is a really good thing- it helps with the transition into school as well- with the VPK program in FLorida i have seen children who have not been in earlier pre-K programs falter and watched those who had obviously been in formal programs thrive- there is such a huge difference in the performance levels and adaptability for that reason alone its worth it- besides, a little mommy-time alone is a good thing too.. you might even enjoy it after awhile. And if you put her in a good program with a good curriculum, she wont get bored..(my son was in a program since he was 4 months old- not by choice.. i had to work but, he NEVER got bored and now in kindder is at the top of his class and being tested for 'gifted')

on another note, it helps with building up immunities against illness to be in a surrounding consistantly with other children (ask the pediatrician).

Good luck.. its a hard move but well worth it in the end

H.,

I think the earlier the better. I waited until my middle son was 4 and I wish I would have done it earlier. With my oldest son I put him in a 9 months, he is now 12 and it made a huge difference. I will be enrolling my 3rd son shortly after his 2nd birthday. It is good for them.

Good Luck

S.
SAHM of 3 boys, 12, 4 and 1 1/2

Hi H.,

I know how it feels when you have to make that big decision, well by my expirience with my boy, know he is 3 years and 4 months but since he was 2 years and 10 months, pretty much 3 I had the impresion that he was ready for pre-school, and you can tell by there way to act, he was like acting on a diferent way, some people told me, that maybe was his way to tell me, Mom I am ready, I need friends and I want more activities, and trust me I made a good decision, just yesterday we made our first family project, was so fun, I think I was more excited than my husband or my boy, H., but every case it's diferent case, and kids are special, sometimes kids at 2 years old they are ready, but try and if you notice that she is feeling happy, and making improvements, learning, well then she was ready, sometimes we underestimate our kids, they know and they know a lot, best wishes,
God bless you and your family.
Y.

I'm not sure what kind of premium there is on daycare spaces in your area, but in Palm Beach county it can be difficult to find a good match. You may want to consider getting her on a waiting list for next school year. I hear most VPK programs (1/2 day gov't subsidized daycare) fill up very quickly with people already enrolled. If you plan ahead, you'll be able to take advantage of this program. Keeping her home now and planning for the future is probably a great plan! I think half time enrollment (at least) and taking advantage of the VPK when she's 4 is a great way to go. I do agree that socialization and being in a structured "classroom environment" are VERY important factors to consider.

T.
A public school teacher and Mom to a 16 month old

H.,

It is not too early. Most of my friends have their kids going around two years old. My Son has been going to a Prep-school since he was 3 months. He loves it, he learns so much there. Being an only child for last two years, he is Mr. Social. The school he goes to has dance, plus teaching the kids there ABC's and more. I work from home so my daughter is going to stay with me until she is at least 2 years old since I feel that they really don't learn anything until then from childcare. I hope that help you.

Since she interacts with new kids often then she's getting the socialization she needs. If you feel she is ready to learn more then you just need to decide if you should be the one teaching her or if you feel you should pay someone else who can do that better.
It's not only dependent on what she's ready for but whether you feel you are more or less capable of doing for her than the particular daycare providers available to you based on your time/finances/patience/resources. If you feel the right thing is to keep her home there is a wealth of info available on the internet to help you teach your little one and teach her at her own pace. I'll be glad to send you some of that info if you're interested.
Just remember to follow your instincts because they are going to be right. By the way, 11 of my nieces and nephews did not go to daycare or VPK and everyone of them are exceptional students because their mom's were great teachers. 4 of my nephews went to day care and are better off for it because their mom knew she didn't have the patience or resources to do what the local daycare offered and she is a great mom too.
Good Luck!