Potty Training Mom Needs Encouragement

She will get it. And it isn't fair to expect child care of church to have to change a child and the mess they have made until she is using the pottty regularly. You can have her use either pull-ups or diapers in those places. She will understand at home it's panties and elsewhere it's the other. You might try potty-training in a weekend, with a cool reward at the end of it. Give her plenty of liquids one day so she has plenty of opportunity for using the potty. For my son I used 1 m&M if he sat on the potty, 3 if he actually did something in it. Pushing the liquids gives her plenty of practice opps. Also, explaining she has to hold the peepee in until she gets to the potty, then let it out seemed to help with my boys. For my oldest, I just let her run around naked from the waist down,and she was trained in a day. One time it was running down her leg to her foot, hated that, the next time it got to her thigh, ran her to the potty, she sat down, and she was trained after that. Her sister wasn't that easy. It took her deciding she was ready to wear panties, then she kept them dry and was trained after that. It is so worth the trouble to be free of diapers!

Good luck
R.

1 mom found this helpful

My daughter also showed interest in going to the potty around age 2 but we weren't sucessful. I'm a teacher-librarian and waited until she was 3 (she has a summer birthday), for 3 days she wore a long shirt and no pants; I sat her on the potty on a regular basis (every 30-45 min) and pushed the water. She had one or 2 accidents, didn't like the wet, after that it was easier. We went to but "big girl" panties of her choice. She'd wear pull-ups to bed or for long rides "just in case". When she started to be dry through the night we switched over to panties. Your daughter may just not be ready yet so don't let this become a power struggle with her. Try pull-ups when she's out in public (Church, or child care) but remind her and the caretakers that she's to make every effort to make it to the potty.

I know this sounds tough but you need to take a week off from work just for potty training. My daughter was potty trained in one week before the age of two. We did not leave the house for 5 days, then we slowly ventured out for short trips, by day seven we were in the clear. I made her sit on the potty for 5 minutes every 20 minutes at first. I f she remained seated she got a sticker if she peed or pooped she got 1 m&m candy. Once I figured out her potty habits I waited longer in between sitting times eventually she told me when she had to go. ALso I carried around the potty into every room of the house so it was always right there and accessible to her. Good Luck, by the way do not use pull ups, they are a waste of money, you may do more laundry but she will learn.

My first daughter was potty trained in a week. After we told her that she was not going to be able to wear the pretty panties we bought if she continued to wet in them. My second daughter it took much longer. She was in daycare and they said she had to be potty trained by 3 or she would have be leave the daycare. So we pushed her. But it helped when we used pullups for her. We treated them like panties. So maybe you could have the daycare and sunday school use the pull ups. The kind that they feel when they are wet. Potty training is all in her time. She may be showing an interest in potty training but she may not be totally ready for it yet. I think a realistic age for potty training is 2 1/2 to 3. So let her go at her pase. When she gets it she will be potty trained fast.

I feel your pain! My daughter showed interest a few months before her 2nd birthday but then as soon as I encouraged her, she backed off and then was off and on until the week before her 3rd birthday. I know it's hard because once they show interest, you wish the transition was complete as fast as possible. Unfortunately it does take time, but she'll get there. Just keep encouraging her...

My daughter got interested when she turned 2 and now she will be three in October and she still will not go poop in the potty. She does not tell us when she has to go but maybe once a day. The other times we have to tell her to go. I feel your pain but you have only been doing it for a week and I am going on a year. So if figure out how to do it faster please let me know.

First of all it does sound like she is nearing the ready stage. I would continue your efforts at home, however, expecting your Sunday School and daycare to maintain this a little unfair as it really is an unrealistic expectation. I worked with this age group in both of those settings and usually it isn't appropriate for you to bring her in underwear until she is having success a majority of the time. There are usually a number of children in these settings and urine is a "biohazard" to a certain extent, so every time there is an "accident" someone has to keep the other kids away while someone cleans and sanitizes the area. A lot of times there may only be one person in the room. Yes this can be frustrating and you're right consistency is important, however when dealing with a group setting you have to keep in mind all the other children and teachers.

If you are really wanting her to get through this you might want to take a week of vacation or something to get her over the hump, Or you may just need to plan on pacing yourself.

There really isn't a timeline as every child is different. It sounds like she is motivated so that's a good sign for a shorter training period, but like I said, everyone is different. It could be done in a week or it could take months.

i would stop taking diapers/pullups with her to daycare and just panties & changes of clothes. it was easy with my son, because his daycare had specific guidelines for potty training(if they weren't already) at 2 1/2 years old. i had set an egg timer for every 15 min. and then set him on the toilet, if he went he got a small treat(whatever his favorite candy was-sugarfree of course), if he didn't go he didn't get a treat..3 days & he was done. i didn't use pull ups at night either because it trains them into thinking they don't have to get up at night & go. good luck it can be a pain.

You are doing fine. She will learn in her own time. Have you thought about getting her something she REALLY wants to use as leverage?
My son had learned, but still wouldn't go in the potty. I bought him, even though I didn't like it, the Spongebob Movie. I told him if he went in the potty he could watch it, and he did! From then on out, we turned it off if he went somewhere besides the potty. He got it down very quick and very well.
I know from experience that preschools are terrible about supporting parents in this, especially if the kids are young toileting learners. Keep insisting and keep trying. You will get somewhere eventually. My boys had IEPs, so we just forced the teachers by adding toilet training to the IEP. You may not have that option, but if you stand firm, you will get what you need eventually.

Hello L.. I am a mother of two little boys one in which is already potty trained and the other I am just starting. My advice to you for at home is to: set a timer for every 1/2 hour and when the timer goes off have your child sit on the potty then set the timer again for ten minutes and make her sit there until the timer goes off. She will eventually start using the toilet during her time on the potty. Also I keep little cardboard books in a basket on the floor next to my little ones potty so we can sit and read stories while waiting for the timer to buzz. This really helps keep it fun for them. As far as your child care center I would use reinforcements if they do not start doing as you wish inform them that you will take your business else where. They will not want to lose you business so it should work. And last but not least just keep reminding your child's Sunday school of your wishes. I hope my advice helps you. Good luck!
T.

Be patient! We started at that age and our daughter did good for a bit, but then it turned into a screaming match. On the advice of our pediatrician, we stopped for a few months. When we reapproached, it was the same, so again we waited. We also spent 10 minutes sitting on the bathroom floor waiting for it to happen. We would take her off and as soon as we would put her pull-up or panties on her, she would pee. AGH! It was crazy! When my daughter turned 3 we tried again and it stuck. She was trained within a week and pooped within 2. Her being older was wonderfule becasue she understood it better.

In terms of the daycare and Sunday school, you MUST put your foot down. You are 100% right...your little one will not learn if she is getting mixed signals. Once we started potty training, we no longer had diapers in the house, just panities and pull-ups. If they can't follow the directions you give, then speak with a Director at both places and insist.

When I potty trained my girls, I just let them run aroung with no pants on when we were at home. For some reason, neither one of them could stand the feeling of the pee running down their legs (not that I can blame them for that). I think my oldest one peed on the floor maybe 3 times and the middle one only once. My oldest was potty trained at 2 years and 6 months, and my middle one was potty trained by 25 monhts. The second time around was much esier, I think because she got to see mommy AND big sister going potty. As far as daycare is concerned... I would talk to the administrator (sp). Find out what their policies are on potty training. Maybe she could move to a different room where they assist in the training instead of hindering it.

I totally understand where you are. My daughter will tell us she needs to go potty, but most of the time, she's already gone. We keep her in the pull-up diapers for this reason (can't afford the laundry costs).

The thing with preschools and churches is that they often don't have the staff to keep up with potty needs. Some do, but most don't. I know at our church has had problems with this. More than once, my daughter has come home with wet pants because her diaper didn't get changed and it leaked.

Give it time and be patient with her. You said she's pooping in the potty? That's great. My daughter won't even do that.

There is a method you can try that a friend of mine used with good success. It has its downfalls, but could be worth it to you in the end. Basically, you wake your daughter up in the morning and take her directly to the potty. Don't wait for her to wake up. Then, take her to the potty every hour all day long. I don't remember if you are supposed to wake her up in the night or not though. This method is said to be effective in about 3 days. But, you would probably need to stay home unless you know for sure you would have access to a toilet she could use or feel comfortable traveling with her potty. Be prepared for accidents! They will happen, lol.

If you find something that works and leaves me with minimal laundry (an no pee spilled on the floor, lol), let me know. :) Otherwise, we can commiserate in this 'wonderful' challenge of toddler-hood together, lol.

God bless,
A.

Hang in there, when she is ready it will happen almost overnight. (I didn't believe this either, until it happened for us) My daughter is 3.5yr and started potty training around 2.5yr. She just wasn't interested (too much to do, I guess!) Anyway, we let her finally just do it on her own and around her birthday SHE decided it was time. If only I hadn't tried so hard to get her to do it. I will know what to do when my son is ready in a few months. Incidently, my daughter is strong-willed so everything has to be her idea anyway. Don't stress out about it and if possible get the pullups or easy ups (or generic brand) that turn cold when the start to potty in them. If she doesn't like to be uncomfortable that may work for you (and protect your floor in the meantime)! Good Luck, and don't worry she will get there! We used a reward system with stickers but that didn't make a tremendous difference until she wanted to be potty trained.

You did the right thing by introducing the potty to her, you are doing the right thing while you are at home letting her try it ( when she is interested in doing so) but, she is not ready to potty train she is just getting interested.........so, my advice is to back off a bit, go back to diapers with out saying anything to her. remind her every once in a while that when she is ready you have these cute panties for her ( and seriously get rid of the plastic pull overs) let her pick out more next time you are at target.... prepare her and then when she is ready to start, she will tell you. All my kids told me the day they were ready and I had almost no accidents with all 4. In fact teh last two never wet their beds. (knock on wood)

You are right, people taking care of her daily should do whatever you ask them to do - you are paying them after all. Sunday school can be a little harder, but they should make the effort.
Do you have a few books she can read on the potty while you wait. Maybe getting her mind off what she's "supposed to be doing" will help?

Don't get discouraged...it took me a good 2-3 weeks to get my son potty trained, but eventually he just got it. Maybe when she tells you she has to go potty make her sit there until she goes. Or if she goes a whole day without going in her pants she gets a special surprise. Or if she goes potty she gets a piece of candy or a sticker on a potty chart. Whatever you do, don't put her in pull-ups...it's a complete waste of money and i think it confuses them b/c they feel exactly like a diaper. Hope this helps and good luck :)

Hello,
Be patient! She will get it soon. She will get tired of being in a poopy or wet diaper. I would be very firm toward Day care and Sunday school not putting her in diapers. Send a couple changes of clothes and of course, no diapers and just be firm with them. Ask them to work with you and let them know how hard you have been working at home with her. Discuss it with them daily. Also try giving her incentives to go to the potty such as playing game with her, reading a book, doing an activity. Don't make the mistake I did training my little boy at first, I would tell him he could have a piece of candy if he went to potty, I was desperate and after a couple of days, I realized he was going about every 10 minutes just to get candy! But it worked at first, gave him a boost but I stopped that quickly. I took him to the potty every 30 minutes or so and when he went, we would do something fun, variety of things, just be patient, you'll be surprised, Lots and lots of clapping and praise works well also!
Good Luck! H.

I'm there with you! Our daughter is 3 1/2 and she just recently began to go pee on the potty on her own (without a reminder to go except when we leave to go somewhere.) And we started her at around 2 also. Fact is - we were the ones who were trained! I talked to her doctor and several other mothers about it. I think it is good to get them to go on the potty as much as possible to begin training. (before nap, bed, etc.) But like you said, don't get frustrated. They will use the potty when they are ready. Even if they don't actually go, let them be "in control" of their potty and try not to have any power struggles over it. (I learned that the hard way!) I think that it is a maturity thing too. They are so busy learing about their surroundings that they may not want to take the time to go. Also - I heard that an actual hormone is released in their bodies that creates the sensation of the "urge" to go.

Since she goes after she gets off the potty - try an old trick of putting her hand (or foot) in some warm water with a toy in it for interest and it could make her pee without even meaning to while she is on the potty! I used to tell my daughter that I wanted to hear the "trickle." (Okay - that's a little embarrassing, but we both laughed!)

But good practice now will help the process later ... I know diapers are so ridiculously expensive too. I praised my daughter when we went to the potty and her pull-up/diaper was still dry. Try to make it fun - y'know with the funny noises we all make on the potty! (and sometimes not on the potty!) Good luck and be paitent - she'll train when she's ready!

Potty training takes a while. Relax. I'm not sure how daycare centers handle potty training, but if there are a lot of kids involved, diapers or pullups may be a necessity until she is more fully trained. If you are in a hurry, take some time off and work on it at home.

It has only been a week! If it is pretty much a guarentee that she is going to have an accident while she is at daycare or church, then it is not a fair request to only have her in panties. I know if it were me, and it were my job to care for them it that setting, I would be thinking of how to avoid a lot of that. You should have her in a pull up and ask that they give her several opportunities to try to sit on the potty. That is a fair request. Now if she were closer to potty trained, that would be a COMPLETELY different story and panties only is very acceptable. At this point, what you are requesting of these people is unreasonable, especialy at church. Cleaning up your own child is frustrating enough, but continually another's child, while their mom says, "panties only, and here are 3 extra sets of clothes." I would want to tell the parent that I would do panties only as long as she accepts she will be paged to come and clean the pee and poop from everywhere during church, even if it is 3 times during church. The fair thing is to either accept it, or do not make the church take care of her while you are in church. Leave her with her father or a trusted friend who may be more willing to clean their carpet and couch all day long until she is more on the side of completely potty trained. You are asking others to potty train her for you. I am sure others will cover the other topics in your post. This is the one I thought I would share my feelings on, and I know a lot of moms who are being honest would completely agree, as we have all potty trained at least one chlid and have also experienced nasty messes on occasion as part of that. Besides, you don't want soemone to punish her for an accident this early on. It just isn't fair to your child either.

The best of luck with the potty training fun!

A.

Hi, L.,

First, I just wanted to say - thanks for the early morning chuckle you gave me. :) I was skimming through the questions, and saw your title - Potty Training Mom, which gave me the image of a MOM being trained to use the potty!

As the owner of a childcare facility, I have to say please put pull-ups on her, rather than panties. Cleaning up your daughter's possible accidents really adds work for the providers, and to be frank, makes them resentful toward you, and that could carry over to your daughter. Not the way it should be, no, but it's the truth. Get the daycare people to work with you by asking them how they think it should be done. (They appreciate being asked for advice) They should be willing to ask your daughter frequently if she needs to use the potty, and they should be willing to take her in and sit her down, if it's been a while since she went. We trained one little girl by giving her an M&M (just one, and with her mom's approval) each time she went on the potty.

And finally, try (though it's hard!) not to stress about it. She sounds like she's doing great for her age. Probably sooner, rather than later, from the sound of it. Just hang in there, you're doing what you should be and she WILL get it eventually.

Blessings, J.