I tried to do the "Potty Party" method with one of my twin boys yesterday (from "Potty Train Your Child in Just One Day" by Teri Crane) and it failed miserably. He is 32 months old and I thought he was ready. The first part of the morning, when we potty trained a doll, went okay. The second part of the afternoon felt rushed, (where you graduate to big boy underpants after nap and focus on training, then have a little party at the end) and I felt like I was feeling the pressure to get him to go in the potty several times before the party. He cried a lot and had several accidents in his big boy underwear, and didn't pee in the potty once.
I ended up cancelling the "congratulations" part of the party and decided to try pull-ups this morning. I gave him a balloon, which is really motivating, and he did pee in the potty once in the morning. We put a sticker on his chart and gave him an M&M and made a big deal about it. I left the balloon in the bathroom to motivate him. He kept saying he had to go potty, sitting on the potty for half an hour playing with his balloon. He did not pee in the potty any of these times and then promptly peed in his pull-ups the second we left the bathroom. Does this mean he isn't ready? He is going through a period of negativism and wanting control right now, lots of wanting the opposite of what we want all the time!
When I put my son in big boy undies, he was all ready in pull-ups and using the potty about 50% of the time, so I knew he knew what he was doing and when he needed to do it. The first day in big boy undies he had 13 accidence and was begging for his pull-up, but I said no. The next day he had 2 accidence, and then none. Relax, there is no time limit on this. Let him wear pull-ups for a while and practice before you go at it full on.
We did the Potty Party with our first, too. Potty training in one day ... yep, too good to be true, unless your child is not strong willed and is definitely ready for it. It was a total disaster with our son. To this day, we still laugh about how ridiculous we were as first-time parents doing the Potty Party.
If it was the same disaster we had, your son isn't ready. We waited a couple more months before trying again. Honestly, what turned things around was when all of our son's friends from daycare moved to the preschool room and he was left with the little kids. We then moved him to underwear and made major progress when he was a few months past three years old.
Second child, we took the lead from her. She wanted to use the potty at 2 1/2 and we went from there. She trained within months. No silly dolls, timers or parties in the bathroom, just put her in panties and took her when she needed to go.
Good luck!
Briefly, there are three things you can not make a child do--eat, sleep, and poop or peep. (sigh)
My son was not trained until 4+ years, and I did not push it. The trick that worked with my son was not my pressure, it was totally outside my reach. I brought him in to meet his 4 year old preschool teacher. She said, "I do not change diapers" to me. He heard it. I did not say a word. We went home and he was--not really "trained" but I never changed another diaper! He was motivated for his own reasons.
It sounds like you have been trying really hard to help your son use the potty. Sometimes I think our culture puts too much emphasis on these things and then we all (parents and children) end up frustrated! Here's a link to an article I found helpful: A Toilet Tale Part 1 http://www.handinhandparenting.org/csArticles/articles/00...
And Part 2: http://www.handinhandparenting.org/csArticles/articles/00...
I find sometimes when I let go of wanting a certain result and just throw my hands up in the air and say I give up!, my daughter and I both relax and then the "problem" just sort of seems to resolve itself. When you're willing to wait "forever" for something I find it appears a lot quicker! And the ultimate truth is you'll love your son even if he never potty trains.
We tried the reward charts, candy bribes, wearing underwear, "naked" days, etc. and had very little success with our son. Sometimes he would go, but most of the time he didn't (but he would sit for half an hour and then go in his pull-up when he left the bathroom, just like your boy). We even had him pick out a special toy he really wanted and posted a picture of it by the potty, but that still didn't work. We backed off, and then all of a sudden one day he was potty trained. I guess he was finally ready. We didn't do anything different that time - he just started going in the potty, so we started putting him in underwear again, and he never had an accident. He potty trained himself in one day! He was about 4 months shy of his 4th birthday when it happened, and it's been 5 months now.
I would back-off the potty training. My 1st was 4 before she was fully potty-trained, despite all of my attempts (rewarding, bribing, and yes, even yelling, I'm not proud to admit!) We watched all the videos, read all the books, but she refused to go! She is very strong-willed and refused to poop on the potty. My youngest potty-trained herself at 33 months, but she still wears pull-ups at night. I somewhat agree that pull-ups are glorified diapers, but she can put them on like underwear and she knows when she's had an accident in them (some brands have the ability to know when they've wet in them). When I backed-off, we were all happier and it enabled her to make the choice to go on the potty.
Good luck!!
I think it's a great sign that he was playing with the balloon on the potty and associating his gift with going. That's a sign that he understands that he can get something for going potty. But, in general, if it's this much work...I'd wait a bit. It's really easy once the child wants to be there. Once I gave up the control and pressure, both of my kids got it down quickly. Make it his thing, on his terms and just help him when he needs it. He'll get it, just try not to rush it. I know it's hard when you want to be done with the whole thing though. It won't be long. :)
pull ups are a waste of money.. my daughter called them panty diapers..
she peed in them cause they feel just like diapers when you wear cotton underwear and pee - it runs down your leg and doesnt feel good.
your son does not sound ready..if he is being negative nto a good time..
my son will be 3 in june and we are not training.. he is nto ready.. wait.. when he is ready it will be easy..
but skip pull ups .. save your money ..buy lots of underwear and then you can throw away ones that get pooped on.
He's not ready. And pull-ups are diapers. I don't care what they are marketed as, they are just over-priced diapers. If he's really ready, put away the diapers. It just doesn't sound like he's ready. Is he upset by the accidents? I'm guessing if it doesn't bother him, than he's simply not there yet. All kids are different ages when they are developementally ready to use the potty. My daughter was 3 and my son was 2. Follow their lead.
I HIGHLY recommend you read 'Stress Free Potty Training' by Au. It has different chapter's for different personalities and teaches you different techniques that work with each personality. Your son may not be ready, or maybe he needs a different technique and I think this book will offer it to you. good luck to you!
He may not be ready. I wouldn't put any pressure on him and just postpone the full thing.
I tried to potty train my son over the week end just 3 weeks ago. Total failure.
Then, I decided to postpone it until his birthday. But, he woke up the next Tuesday and said "no diaper today". He had about one accident a day the first week and 4 accidents the week after and only 2 last week. Dry day and night, all at once.
As for the pull-ups, we use them at night, so he feels like underwear but the mattress is protected! Another way to use them is over the underwear. This way, in case of accident, the pants stay dry but the child feels he is wet.
I would wait til he's 3. Sounds like he's just not ready. I'd back off for about 4-6 months.
