Potty Training - Saint Louis, MO

Updated on July 28, 2008
A.A. asks from Saint Louis, MO
13 answers

Calling all potty training advice. I have a little boy who turned just turned 3 and I have a 2 year old little girl. I feel like I have been potty training my son forever! He currently wears pull-ups and pees in the potty most of the time. He has only pooped in the potty once and physiologically doesn't seem ready/understanding of when to do so. I'm just wondering when to make the full switch to underwear. Every time I try, he ends up with wet pants within an hour, whereas he somehow knows to use the potty when wearing pull-ups. I've tried bribes, stickers, the happy potty dance, everything! My 2year old is already starting to pee in the potty, and he seems to care less about what she is doing. I just feel like he will never be done training! My husband and I both work 3 days a week (12 hour days) so we are pretty consistent since daycare is not in the picture.

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for your advice. It's only been a week or so, but I've been trying to just be more laid back about it with him. We switched my daughter to pull-ups and her using the potty more and more seems to be encouraging him. I try to show encouragement when she goes potty and then suddenly he wants to use the potty too. I still think it's going to be a little bit of a struggle with him, but I'm trying not to stress. She's probably going to be in underwear within the month which may help him along. Thanks again to everyone and good luck to all the other potty trainers!

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S.G.

answers from Topeka on

I have 4 daughters, 3 are potty trained. I know its hard, but I put panties on them when i started potty training them. i read in a book when i was potty training my oldest (7 now) and it said that pull ups make them feel like they are still wearing pampers. and they dont know when they go potty as if they would when they would wear panties. I did this with all three of them. and they were potty trained with in a month.

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L._.

answers from San Diego on

My advice is to just keep him in the pull-ups and keep encouraging him to make the full switch when he's ready. I've never seen a child go to Kindergartin in pull-ups unless they had a mental or physical handicap. He will get it one of these days soon! Pull-ups are not that expensive. If he is down to only using it when he is dirtying his britches, then he must be wearing only 2 per day. I can't imagine that 50 cents per day is killing the budget too much?

I seriously wonder why people are in such an all fire hurry to force kids through this. Kids are ready at various ages and stages. My kids all had at least 2-3 accidents in their 4 and 5 years. So even if they are in underwear, it's no guarantee that it's never going to happen.

Relax. :) I think you should concentrate on your 2 year old. Your day without diapers will come soon enough.

Suzi

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M.L.

answers from Kansas City on

I answered another poster about a similar situation...

I have been thru the potty training fun twice now and it requires a lot of work and commitment from everyone involved in the process.
After lots of research I found this list to be helpful. It saved a lot of time and headache deciding whether or not my kids were truly ready to be potty trained. Trying to train them before they are ready only causes more frustration to the child.

15 Signs of readiness for potty training

Your child is ready for potty training when he or she:
1. Has bowel movements at about the same time every day
2. Can stay dry for a few hours or wakes up dry from sleep
3. Knows that he/she has to go to the bathroom
4. Understands the association between dry pants and using the potty
5. Can pull her pants up and down
6. Lets you know when he/she has soiled his/her diaper (likes to stay dry) 7. Can follow simple directions like, "lets go to the potty"
8. Understands potty training terms (wet, dry, pee, poop, dirty and potty)
9. Can tell you he/she has to go to the bathroom
10. Imitates other family members
11. Shows interest and asks question while watching you
12. Wants to do things "by myself"
13. Enjoys washing his/her hands (like to be clean)
14. Gets upset if his/her belongings are not in their proper place
15. Wants to please you!

Remember there is no rule that says every child should be trained by age 2. Every child is different and learns at a different pace. Be patient.
I hope this is helpful to you and Good Luck..

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V.C.

answers from St. Louis on

Bribary! I put a jar of my son's favorite candy - milk balls in the bathroom. I told them the only time he could have them was when he went on the potty. Suddenly he had to use the big potty and did! Within a day we wer out of pull ups during the day. He still had accidents but theywere more often on the way to the bathroom. He caught on fast because accidents didn't earn candy. After quite sometime we lt him have that candy at other times and not always because of the potty. He is 4 now and we just quit pull ups at night, but during the day hasn't been a problem in a year! Good luck

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K.O.

answers from Wichita on

Hi, A.! Potty training certainly can be a challenge. I have four boys and all of them trained at different times and ages. It is frustrating, but just wait until he is ready. My last son did not train until he was four years and two weeks old! However, he was ready and had two accidents and has wet the bed only once! I was getting very discouraged and getting some interesting looks from other parents, but I assure you it was worth the wait. He is a happy, confident, totally potty trained boy. Two accidents sure beat the many accidents the other boys had each time that I tried to train them before they were ready! Good luck! Hang in there! Kati

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L.L.

answers from Kansas City on

I am a mom of 3 wonderful boys- 8,6 and my baby just turned 3 on July 1st! Due to my experiences with my other 2 boys, I haven't even started potty training him yet! I think that with boys, some of them can be 3 1/2 to 4 years before they are trained. My oldest was 3 years and 2 weeks, my second (who I thought would be quicker because of watching his older brother) was 3 years and 2 months! With both of them I stressed about it for 6 months or more with the stickers, candy etc etc and decided with my last that he will do it when he is ready and I haven't even started.
I'm going to skip over pull ups all together and go striaght to underwear when he is ready. Now, when I say I haven't even started- I don't mean I don't ask him if he wants to try occasionally. When he starts waking up dry, I'll know it's almost time.

Anyway, my point is don't stress about it because it will happen when he wants it to happen and in the end, really isn't so important in the bigger picture. Stressing yourself and him out about it- can make it take even longer.
And after all this, your daughter will be potty trained well before she is 3. (I've heard girls are much faster!)

All kids are different and will be trained when they are ready, don't worry if it seems like the whole world is trained before yours!
Hang in there!!

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

it's hard to be patient after 3 years of diapers! (and 2 years of TWO in diapers, i'm sure!) my son is 22 months and we recently bought the potty ring for the toilet...he went two mornings in a row, then NOTHING, even refusing to sit on it a day or two this past week. frustrating! BUT i haven't pushed it because he is only 22 months, and because he's a boy and i've heard they take longer (your situation, case in point!), AND because pushing, in my mind, will only make it harder for him. so we've gone several days without even talking about the potty. (except i hear him jabber about it pretty frequently, and i ask him if he has to go and he says, "NO!")

i'm sorry i don't have any real advice...just wanted share your pain. although, you can look at it like i do...sometimes it's a lot easier to just plop down and change a diaper, than to take off the shoes, take off the pants, take off the diaper/pullup, sit with them for five minutes, then put it all back on...at least...i try to tell myself this is easier lol. it doesn't always work...:)

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K.B.

answers from Wichita on

Good Morning A., It's pretty normal at least at our house..lol Corbin was 3 in March, pp trained well but the poopoo is still being worked on. And he didn't mind his pull up being wet either. He wears pull ups only at nap time, since I do not want to get papa's side of the put wet if an accident happens. And that is usually when he poops.
Just yesterday he got up from his nap (didn't tell me) and went to poop in potty. Then ask me to clean him up. Went right back to bed and finished his nap. WOW. I was blown away.

It's only recently last week or so that he has gotten up in the morning dry also. SO his momma is thinking about getting rid of the pull ups at night if he continues to be dry in the morning.
I said all of that A. to let you know with some little ones it just takes time others are trained in a snap. But it sounds like you and hubby are doing everything right. Keep doing what your doing and he will get it one day.

God's Blessings over your family
K. Nana of 5

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C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

A year ago (just before turning three) we were having the same problem and I just didn't understand why he would have little accidents all the time in his underwear and never wanted to poop in the potty. Then I began to wonder if maybe having anything on down below made him feel like he was wearing a diaper. SO, we did three days of naked below the waist and it worked. He remembered to run in and pee (with reminders). The first night he was running around all free and easy and said "Mom, I am going to go poop." I assumed he was pretending but he actually went in there and did it and there was no turning back. Hope that helps a little.

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A.P.

answers from Kansas City on

A.,
With my son, I just switched him to regular underwear cold turkey, I picked up extra packs of underwear and some extra shorts on clearance and refused to buy any more pull-ups.

I'm a full time nurse in Gardner too, where do you work?

Alex
full time rn and mom of Gabe 19 months and Jason 3 1/2.

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S.S.

answers from Kansas City on

It sounds like he is not ready to switch to underwear and their is a certain amount of comfort for him in wearing the pull-ups. My son was trained to pee on the potty for almost a year before he started to poop. We tried the whole bribery thing and it was so frustrating. He would poop at nap time whether he was wearing a pull-up or underwear. In his case, he was afraid to poop because it would hurt. His doctor recommended we put him on Miralax to soften his stool. Unfortunately, Miralax was cheaper before they offered it over the counter, but you would need to talk to your doctor about this first. My doctor said this is not uncommon in boys for them to be afraid to poop or be easily constipated. After a few days on the Miralax, he became more receptive to pooping on the toilet. It sounds like your daughter will be fully trained soon so hang in there. Hang in there! Your son will get it when he is ready.

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J.N.

answers from Wichita on

Good morning A.,

I also have a 3 year old boy. He started being interested in the potty at 2 1/2 years old. That was all tho just interested. He is now finally toilet trained. He was 3 years and 4 months, but he did it. He told me that he wanted to go to preschool. We told him that he needs to use the big boy potty before he can go to preschool. He said okay and we transitioned to big boy underwear. Of course, we would take him to the bathroom every 45 minutes to an hour. Until he was able to do it on his own. Yes, we had accidents too, but that happens. He is very proud of himself and we didn't stress out about it. I feel if we would of been stressed it would of took longer. The biggest thing I have to say is don't force him, it will come, it just takes a little longer for some. Have patience and just be consistent with him.

We also have a daughter that was toilet trained at 2 1/2 years during the day, and at night by 3 years old.

Have fun with your 2 children because they seem to grow up quickly. Best of luck with everything.

Jen

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T.R.

answers from Kansas City on

A.

He just isn't ready. My 3 year old goes ALL day at pre-school and then it is hit and miss at home. I have been told boys just take longer and it will come naturally. I try not to worry about it. Now, if he gets to 4? then, I will be more concerned.

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