Postpardum Depression

Updated on February 28, 2007
A.S. asks from Chickasha, OK
35 answers

I have been having really bad mood swings. one minute im fine and the next i just want to scream. everything and everyone is getting on my nerves. i am more tired then i was when i was pregnant with the twins. i start to cry for no reason. my fiance says that i am really hard to live with right now. i have started gaining weight too. i feel like i have postpardum depression. if anyone else has gone through this will you please help. im going to the doctor on friday to find out what wrong.

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E.S.

answers from Springfield on

I had the same problem after my son was born. My doctor said I should try the medication and I did but honestly it wasn't worth the side effects. I just take a little bit of time to do things that I enjoy like reading. Also my husband takes the baby and I take a long hot bath.

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K.M.

answers from St. Louis on

I went through that too. I cried for absolutely no reason and thought I was going nuts. It's something a lot of women go through. It's just something you have to get through. I went to the doctor who told me to give it time, and that he'd put me on a medication if it didn't get better. I got lucky I guess and it went away before he put me on medicine. Hang in there.
K.

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V.G.

answers from Kansas City on

I am glad you are getting some help for the PPD. The right meds for that can make all the difference in the world. My twin girls are now six months old and I would like to point out that sometimes even without the PPD factor it really is overwhelming. Don't be afraid to ask for help.

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J.B.

answers from Topeka on

A.,
I can some what relate, though i didn't have PPD i have general anxiety. So its every day pregnant or not that i suffer from my problems. I do understand the mood swings, and the frustration. In til you can see your doc, when you get to feeling down and out, try to go to another room, of course make sure your babies are safe 1st. Then just cry, punch a pillow, what ever you need to do. If its the crying that drives you nuts (the babies not your self crying) then try to find a way you can drown it out. IMO its okay to let babies cry for a few mins. Try going for walks, exsersie seems to help PPD also. sometimes a medication is a choice, and i would recommend it. But, it will get better, and you will feel better and your old self. Also about the weight, trust me once the babies start walking/running you will burn off all that post baby weight. And the way i always look at my "baby fat" is its something to be proud of, plus i know no matter what my childern will always see me as beautiful no matter how i look.
take care
J.

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S.E.

answers from Tulsa on

Good for you for reaching out! If your doc doesn't suggest it, be sure you have your thyroid checked when you go Friday - it's a simple blood test. The symptoms of underactive/overactive thyroid are very similar to PPD, and it almost always affects your weight.

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J.M.

answers from Kansas City on

i went through the same thing after having my daughter. my ppd almost ended my marriage! going to the doctor is the best advice i can give you, tell her what is going on and don't be afraid to take medicine. also, be aware (and i'm sure your doc will tell you too) that the first meds he/she gives you may not work. please go back to your doctor and try another one. my first worked great (it helped me sleep) but it also made me gain weight (18 pounds in 6 weeks). i went back to my doc, she changed my meds they work great too, and the weight came back off. my doc told me she wanted me to be on them for 6 months to a year. at the time 6months to a year seemed like a long time, but it has been 7 months and i do not feel ready to go off of them. my husband and i are getting along better than ever, and he tells me i'm back to being the woman he married, and that is good to hear. and once you get to feeling a little better, don't forget to take a little time to yourself. i take my daughter with me to the ymca four days a week. for $1.00 the nursery keeps her for an hour and i go workout. it is cheap, i don't feel like leaving her with a sitter, so this way i feel like she is "with me", and i get time to myself and stress relief. good luck, and God Bless.

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L.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Dear A.,
I recommend you see your Doctor ASAP! Many people don't realize how dangerous Postpartum Depression can be. I have a sister-in-law that has been battling it for years! She has been in and out of hospitals and they have tried so many different medications. She also has postpartum psychosis. No matter what it is - talk to your doctor and if that doctor doesn't help you - find another doctor.
I would think that having twins would increase the hormones in your body and would make it even harder to get through - especially on your own. Good luck to you.

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D.T.

answers from Tulsa on

Oh Dear, we've all been there at some level. My anxiety level after having my first 2 kids was through the roof and I was no where near pleasant to live with; especially when I was having PMS. Of course, I had also just lost a baby, had my gall bladder removed and was needing rotator cuff surgery. A lot of time it's just stress that brings this out.

Even if you have a diagnosis of PPD you're gonna need to lower your stress level. We did that by my husband taking on more chores and responsibility. He handled the morning routine with our oldest. Plus he did dishes, and handled the bed time routine. When I started staying home things did not change. He still did the morning routine, dishes and bed time routine. My husband has a closer relationship with our boys because of it. I feel more confident leaving them in his hands for a mom's night out, or Church Ladie's meeting now. Being less stressed is definitly going to help any medication that you might take make you feel better.

For me the side effects were much more bothersome. I have ulcers and all the medications I tried made them worse, dehydrated me, and of course lowered my sex drive to nothing. Now keep in mind that I have Fibromyalgia(Chronic Fatigue), and BiPolar so I really should be on medications but we handle things the way we do because I have an incredibly understanding husband.

I do what I can to get more sleep, I talk to him about my feelings without him getting upset or judgemental. I exercise, eat, cry and take the weekends off. I have a very special husband and I show him that every chance I get.

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M.C.

answers from Oklahoma City on

A.,
looks like your body went through 2 kids instead of 1. could very well be post-partum depression, is good you see a doc to say yes or not. and of course, you will be so tired, you have 2 babies. one of my sister's has twins and she is in her 40's, these babies are her first, a wait for a long time to be pg.
you will be more than tired, your fiance should be more empathetic, and maybe he should read some information on dad's and newborns/twins. also, it is overwhelming too, adjusting to all things with these babies, your own body, your hormones. take each day at a time, try to squeeze at least 5 minutes to yourself. maybe when you are in the restroom taking care of your personal business, that you can do something for yourself. i hope you have others near to help with the babies, and with you, and your home. get as much help as possible, even if it means you need to rest. rest is very important, my sister finally, after 6 month old twins, said she took a good long rest, and realized that being "super mom" is good, but is good to take care of yourself too. and your babies will be more calmer also.
I hope this is helpful, but, too, go to the doc and tell him all your worries, could very well be a chemical imbalance.
Peace,
M.

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D.V.

answers from St. Louis on

Could be a form of PPD. You're going to your dr. on Friday, be very open and honest with him/her. I have a girlfriend at work who had PPD after she delivered her twins (B/G) five years ago. She never had an ounce of depression in her life and didn't know how to deal with it when she did have it. She wasn't wanting to hurt the babies or anything like that (not saying that's your case either!), she wasn't wanting to hold them or care for them and was crying all the time. At the time she was letting everyone else take care of them and not wanting to touch them. Her biggest fear was going on medication to help with it. She felt like everyone would know and then frown on her. First of all, nobody HAS to know and second of all, WHO cares if they do! At least your doing something about the PPD before it takes a hold of your life. She was only on the meds for about six months and we've talked about since then. She says she feels like she did the best thing for her kids at the time and she joined a couple of twins groups in the area so she had ladies in her situation to talk to. Good Luck to you. Stay strong!

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A.B.

answers from Wichita on

I went through the same thing after I had my daughter a year ago and I'm still living with it. One day i'm fine and the next I just want to scream and hide. Trust me you need help from your doctor. There's nothing wrong with going on medication for it. It helps in so many ways especially having patients with the little ones. I know it's hard having a new baby and I couldn't imagine how hard it would be with twins. But do talk to your doctor and get on something. I wish you luck. Unfortunately for me I have to stay on my meds because mine hasn't really gone away. It takes some time. But get the help because they say if you have had postpartum and you don't get help the likely it could be that you will become bipolar later on. My doctor told me that. So you never know. But I wish you luck and just remember everyone around you loves you even when you are a bit on the grouchy side. lol

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C.N.

answers from Kansas City on

A. H,
It sounds just like PPD, and you're right it sucks! I had it bad with my daughter 4 1/2 years ago. It scared me so bad that I was afraid to have any more babies. I never wanted to feel like that again. I'd have these uncontrollable crying spells, and horrible "fantasies" about unspeakable things.
I finally went to the Dr. and she put me on an anti-depressant/anxiety medication. I feel so much better. I feel like I can at least deal with everything. So much better, in fact, that we had a son last May, who's 9 months old.
I do suggest that if you do go on medication, that you also seek on-going counseling to give you the tools to help you cope with your new role as mommy.
Let us know what happens,
C.

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J.

answers from Kansas City on

I was totally nuts after having my second son. My mood swings were awful and I was very angry. I hated it - I went to the DR and spent a good hour there talking about my moods and such and we decided together that getting off the mini pill and taking an anti-depressant would be a good idea. I honestly think a big part of it for me was the mini pill however my son has a congential defect so I know that was really messing with me as well. It can be very serious so please just call your DR/GYN to talk - they can help you figure out what is really going on.

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L.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

A., I am a mother of a 4 yr old and twin boys that are 1 and I went thru this when they were 6 months old. I know what you are going thru so if you ever wanna talk. Let me know... I will let you know that it does get better. No one could ever prepare any one for twins. I am not sure how women that have more than twins do it. Going to the doctor is the right move. Let me know how it turns out.... L. B

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B.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I see you've gotten a lot of responses, so it should tell you that you are not alone and not crazy. it's good that your going to the doctor. be honest with him/her and be honest with yourself. it's ok to have these feelings and with a little time you will get better. my story---i had my first daughter four and half years ago, i was 28, and i had severe ppd. my doctor prescribed zoloft. i have been taking it since then. i now have three girls, 4, 2 and 6 months. i took the zoloft even throughout my pregnancies. it has helped me in all aspects of my life, not just with ppd. don't get me wrong i still have bad days, but they are totalloy managable now. good luck to you!

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R.M.

answers from Oklahoma City on

It could be postpardum depression or you could just be in a funk right now. Over the last 2 years I went through this. My kids are older (9&12) so I do not have the stress of little ones, even though they can be a handfull some times. I was so bad I would get into fights with my hubby for no reason. So over the last 2 years I went to the Dr. and tried all kinds of meds for it. A lot of them have side affects that I didnt like. I cannot recomend one for you because everyones body reacts to them different but you may want to try getting on something for a little while. I have finally snapped out of it in the last 3 months. I am not taking anything righ tnow and I finally feel 100% better. My advise is to try out the meds and just try taking them for a little while. If you need anything or have any questions about the different ones just let me know.
Good luck and keep your head up, things will get better sooner or later.
~R.

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A.W.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi A., It's normal to feel sad and frustrated. Maybe your doctor can suggest Zoloft to help. I myself take Zoloft and I could'nt imagine myself without it now. It's safe to take it while pregnant,nursing. It's so mild it just takes the edge off and before you know it you feel more like yourself again.
Hope I helped. A.

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T.O.

answers from Kansas City on

I suffered from Postpartum depression after my 2nd was born. The doctor gave me an anti depressant and after about 3mo on it I was able to go off it and have been fine since. I also made a concious effort to make sure I was talking to other adults about things other than work and kids and made alone time for myself to do what I wanted to even if it was only 15 min a day. It does get better and doesn't last forever and she was the only child I had it with, so good luck and remember just take it one day sometimes one minute at a time and it will get better.

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J.L.

answers from Oklahoma City on

A.

I suffered from Post-Partum Depression as well. I had all of those things. They will pass. I also had severe depression when i was pregnant. They prescribed me Zoloft..which made me nuts..lol.. but I just had to realize what it was that was getting to me. I just tried to do the things I loved.. dealt with all of the b.s that was going on.. I eventually came out of it.. it took me months.. just take a break away from all of the stress.. do something for yourself.. I know you may not want to do anything but lie in bed.. cuz that is all i wanted..and just cry all the time..and get mad and frustrated...but your body is trying to go back to it's normal self. This will take a while.. just try to stay positive.. surround yourself with help and take all the support you can. I definatly recommend seeing a doctor. They can give you tips to relieve stress or medication if you need it. I can see you are a bit overloaded. YOu are 23, engaged, working full time.. and most of all you have two precious twins. Whoa! I totally understand. If you need to talk to someone..and you do.. lol.. you can always talk to me. I know how you feel 100%

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A.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Honestly, I don't see how you expect to be happy and in a good mood all the time if you are trying to work full time with new twins. If I were you, I would quit my job and stay home with those babies. It will be stressful, but so is trying to do it all. Even if you feel like screaming, don't, distract yourself and maintain a positive attitude. That's what you would do for a toddler who is trying to learn how to manage their emotions. And be nice to your fiance, because you don't want him to leave you and the children. That would be the worst possible outcome. Antidepressants can help, but I see so many people take them to mask the symptoms of the real problem. Instead of doing that, make some life changes that will actually make you happy.

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D.M.

answers from St. Louis on

A.,
PPD can be very scary, But you can get through it with help. As far as Doctors make sure the doctor is someone who has experience with PPD. It will not nessesarily be your OBGYN. My OBGYN put me on meds when I was ready, but such a low dosage it would have done me no good. There are great doctors out there.
"MOTHER to MOTHER" is a support group in ST. Louis for PPD they are so wonderful. I truely have them to thank for my life. They do phone support as well as group meetings. They can help. ###-###-#### ext 4 Leave a message and Linda will probably be the one to call you. All of those involved in the group are mothers who have delt with PPD. Their only agenda is to help other mothers. NO COST JUST HELP I honestly don't think I would be here if it wasn't for them.

D.

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D.D.

answers from Oklahoma City on

You aren't alone! PPD is normal and more women get it than they realize because they don't get th help they need. I am 5 months postpartum and I have been taking Effexor since 2 months postpartum. It has helped a lot. I hope you can talk to your doctor about this. (((hugs)))

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C.O.

answers from Lawton on

I am so glad you asked this question. Finally, I can help someone. When my son was 14 months old I was diagnosed with post partum. I was not diagnosed earlier because I did not go to the doctor for my symptoms. I thought that you had to basically be psychotic to have it. That assumption was so wrong. I had a lot of the same things you do-the mood swings, the overwhelming feelings, being very edgy and snappy. After losing down to my goal weight after Ethan was born, I gained all of my weight back and this made me feel horrible. My son had a small procedure on his tear duct and I finally had a panic attack where I felt like I couldn't breathe. After two of those I faced the fact that this wasn't going to get any better, so I went to my doc and he put me on Lexapro. Within two weeks I was getting back to myself and by two months I felt incredible again. I'm not saying that this is what is wrong or that Lexapro is a miracle drug, but I am saying that you are not alone and you are doing the right thing by going to talk to your doctor. If you are diagnosed, don't be ashamed and have plenty of support around you. I can't imagine having twins! Going through it with one child was hard enough. Good luck and get back with me if you need to talk about anything. I am 27 and work full time, go to school full time, and live in Gould (SW corner of OK).

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J.L.

answers from St. Louis on

I am not a Dr, but since I have gone through this before I feel like I can honestly say you are having PPD (post-partum depression). I let mine go for 9 months before I went to the Dr. and he told me what was going on with me. I have depression in my family so I was afraid I was going to be like my dad ... however, even though the depression is there ... I do not have his depression and issues. I was put on Prozac and it has worked wonders! Not that drugs are for everyone ... but it really is a good product for this sort of situation. I also wanted to recommend reading "Down Came the Rain" (if you have time ... with twins and working) by Brooke Shields. I didn't go through exactly what she went through ... but it was so accurate for some things. It helped me! I have a heart for moms who go through this! So if your Dr tells you "You are just tired" ... get a second opinion ... because even though you are working and have twins ... other symptoms you are describing suggest otherwise. My husband is a good barometer for this kind of thing because he knew what I acted like before ... so your fiance would be able to tell you how things are for you with your actions and reactions to things! I would also like to suggest making sure you are part of a Mother's group (MOPS, MOMS, etc) so you can get with other women who can relate! Not just to the PPD, but other areas of being a mom. I (am) was a part of a group the same time I went on the Prozac ... I tell everyone I don't know which one it was ... but I felt so much better after getting both of them. I realized I wasn't the only one on a anti-depressant also ... which helped "swallow the pill" better!!!! The best of success and keep us posted!

S.M.

answers from St. Louis on

A.,
I do not know how old your twins are now but I too had post partum with my daughter. Having a child at a young age adds to the stress sometimes. I was 21 when I had my daughter. The first three weeks I was at home I would sit down and just cry for no reason. My husband (who is my daughter's father although we were not married at the time) could not relate to anything I was feeling. I had never been depressed a day in my life before that. Of course then you feel guilty because you really love your child and have no explaination for why you feel like crying all the time. Then one day the depression lifted and I felt fine. It just took a few weeks. Of course for many others it is much more servere and does not go away that easily. If your twins are older than a few months and you still feel this way then you may need to see a professional.
Being a young mom is hard. I was left with no friends (no one my age had kids or wanted to sit at home with me & my daughter to hang out), no money and was at home all day when I was used to working and going to school. I must say that my daughter is still the best thing that ever happened to me. I just had to adjust. THe best thing I ever did was get involved at my church. It gave me the opportunity to be friends with other moms and raise my daughter in a Christian environment. ALthough all the other moms are older than me they treat me the same.
I hope this helps.

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W.M.

answers from St. Louis on

I went through it with both my kids (3 and 1) The first time was awful - I didn't know anything about it - the second time was easier - I was prepared! Get on meds right away, they'll help you even out. It's very common and so normal... tell your fiance he needs to bear with you - you'll get through this!!

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M.Y.

answers from Peoria on

I went through that too but it is different for every woman. The worst of mine lasted for a couple of months probably after the birth of my son but got better but for some people it doesn't. I totally agree that you should go see your doctor. You may need some medication to help get you back to "normal". Take care and remember that it won't last forever.

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R.U.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I just wanted to say I've been there done that. Glad to hear you're getting some help.

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M.W.

answers from Kansas City on

A.,

I strongly suggest you do go to the doctor and be sure to follow through with any guidance he/she gives you (and don’t stop with them if necessary).

I want to share a little bit about my experience with PPD - my husband and I have 3 daughters and 1 son (current ages 16, 15, about to turn 5 and 3). We are from Kansas City, however when our 5 year old was born, we had been living outside of Chicago for almost a year (my husband's company had transferred us there) and right as she turned 3 months old his company transferred us again – this time to Mississippi - 13 months later we had our youngest daughter.

I struggled a bit with mood swings and crying for no apparent reason (commercials would even make me cry) and this was even during my actual pregnancy with our youngest. I attributed it to being pregnant and living where I didn't no a soul (I was a stay at home mom - no true way to meet people except at the school and most didn’t have babies plus children that age) and to top that off, things were very different in the south from what I was used to. So, I thought it was the transition/pregnancy...so did my family - well, after our youngest was born I was on an even bigger roller coaster, unfriendly, sad, mad, irritable, irritating, unhappy, you name it and it took almost a year & a half, plus moving back to Kansas City – plus almost ending up in divorce before I had the help I needed.

The worst part is - I did go to 3 doctors while we were in Mississippi - and they made excuses for my feelings too! They would say – you live in a new place, have small children (so lack of sleep) plus teenagers, husband traveling, no family there, etc. They said that what I was going through would be normal for anyone

Well, my point in telling you all of this is, if you have lots of changes, things are different and you are sad, irritable, up/down - all of that....don't let anyone tell you it's “just normal” and will pass with time. It may be normal, but it can be devastating to go through….and much of the time, it is the imbalance in your body on top of “just normal” life things to deal with. So seek out the help to get through the lack of sleep and post partum body changes...we all have things in our lives that occur - by choice or not - and getting help - even if you have to try and try and try again – it is a good thing! There are options - medications, talking to someone who is outside your family/friends, support groups - they are all good and well worth your time for your precious children, husband and, of course YOU! Good luck!

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S.W.

answers from Springfield on

When I had my first child (3/31/00 and I was 24) I left the hospital with postpardum depression. They doctor watched me very close to make sure it did not get any worse. My husband thought I was nuts. I was a very hard three weeks for all three of us. My doctor told me that the more children you had the more likely it would happen and get worse. In June 05 I had my second child and was fine when I left the hospital. When she was three weeks old it hit me again. This time I had to be put on medication. It was either that or me and my children would not be here. This time it lasted about a week. I had to have someone sit with me on a daily basis until my husband returned home from work. After this my husband and I decided that we were not going to have any more children for the safety of myself. It is a very scary thing to have to go through. I don't regret having my children but that was enough for me to decide to not have any more. When my second child was a month and two days old my husband had a vesectamy(ms). I hope this does not frighted you but the doctor can put you on some medication. Good luck and best wishes. I know what you are going through. Thanks

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J.T.

answers from St. Louis on

i am sorry to tell you this but i think that when i had my son i was still fighting off those spells of postportum for a year afterwards and i still feel it creeping up now and then. they are definately not as bad though. give yourself some time, take a yoga class, make sure that you do something for you, seriously. if you don't you'll end up making yours and your husband's life hell. you guys need to be there for those innocent little treasures you brought here.

i, from personal experience, believe exercise is truly the best for curing depression. try it. nothing crazy like the gym, but a walk around the block, or park (without the stroller) breath deep and be your own best friend. tell yourself, "its all going to be okay." just don't forget to see the world from your point of view now and then. you deserve it.

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J.L.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi A.. I KNOW WHAT YOUR GOING THROUGH!!!!! I just started taking Zoloft in January. I was having a lot of anger issues, gaining wait, My husband said he was dreading coming home because he knew i would start nagging about something. I feel so much better. I have energy now and we dont fight at all now. Its been really great. I would go see your Dr. and dont be ashamed, it happens to lots of us. GOOD LUCK

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L.R.

answers from Oklahoma City on

A.,
Hang in there girl. I promise, "this too shall pass." I am a very positive, upbeat person, and I never thought I would go through any of that with my new baby. I did though, it was a huge adjustment to go from working 3 jobs to staying at home all day. I promise it will get better though!!
If you can, find an online group or a mother's group to vent your feelings to. Take walks, go to your favorite quiet spot, and most of all, say a prayer. God can really help you through all of this! He created you and knows you better than you know yourself. I wish you the best, and if you need to chat anytime, give me a call at ###-###-#### or email me at ____@____.com.

Blessings,
L.
Wanna make money with Gourmet, sootless candles? www.candleheaven.org

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L.

answers from St. Louis on

A. - Very good idea to seek advice from a doctor ASAP. I have two boys, 5 and 2. I developed a severe case of PPD when my second child was 5 weeks. I was so down, I cried all the time, I wanted nothing to do with my new baby, my older son or my husband, and I had thoughts of suicide. I went in to the Dr for an evaluation and found out I had PPD. I immediately went to counseling and got on an antidepressant; both helped substantially. To this day I am still on a low dose of antidepressant for other reasons (PMS) but am happier than I've been in a long time.
A lot of people don't understand PPD (including my husband at first) and it is a very scary thing for all of us to go through. The best think you can do is seek help. If you ever need to talk just give me a call ###-###-####. Take care.

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L.P.

answers from Oklahoma City on

hello my name is L. P., im 38 and i have four kids... well they are grown now, i have twin girls, they just turned 23 feb 12, i had just turned 15 when i had my girls. then i have two boys they are 18 & 19, they are 10 1/2 monts apart. so i had all my kids by the time i was 20. so i had to grow up real fast,, and im very bad at the moody swings, i fell so stressed all the time,and everbody all gets on my nerves it seems like i could screem all the time,,, it is uncontroable so much of the time, i hate that feeling. but i try so hard not to feel like that, and just chill... but i used to be on vaulem 10mg for years, and it helped me so much... but i was going thro marymahoney. becouse i dont make much money. so they cut alote of people off them and lowertabs. so i dont get vaulem anymore, but they worked for me,, it is hard for some reason to get them from doctors anymore,,, well i wish you the best,,, feel free to get back with me... my best friend amy, she knows alote of that stuff. you could e-mail her she said,,,, hope to talk again, very nice to meet you.... L. P.,,,,,,,,,,,,,, her e mail is... ____@____.com

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