PLEASE Help!! 14 Month Baby and I Need to Sleep Through the Night!!

Dear Cestlavia,

Hang in there!

Keep in mind that babies' stomachs can empty as fully, in just a couple of hours, as an adult's stomach does, in a couple of DAYS! That is why babies cry, their stomachs are totally empty! Withholding nourishment when a baby is hungry is probably not the best solution for the baby's health. Also, your baby may be going through a growth spurt - this can mean a sudden need to nurse very frequently (sometimes every hour) for a few days or even a couple of weeks.

Babies are SUPPOSED to cry when they are hungry! That is what lets us know they need nourishment! And the biggest job of every baby is to GROW.

My personal solution was to perfect the art of sleeping while nursing. I never got up out of bed to nurse my baby, i just rolled over, propped pillows, and went back to sleep, and she could nurse as long as she wanted. It's the practical solution, win-wiin for everyone.

Previously - for my whole life - i had been an unusually light sleeper, waking up at everything, but it didn't take long to teach myself to do this, primarily because I was pretty tired! Some mothers said they didnt want to do this because they were afraid they would roll over on their baby - but that NEVER happened! I am SURE that we are programmed on a deep level not to roll over on our babies, or the human race would have died out long ago. And of course I woke up immediately if my baby cried or even poked me.

Meanwhile, I hope you can get in a nap or too, and good luck! Trust me, it is worth it to give your baby the best nutrition possible.

2 moms found this helpful

This is what my pediatrician has to say about it:

http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp

Hope it helps!

2 moms found this helpful

I am in a hurry but I just wanted to say the 3 Day Sleep Solution. It saved my life and every one in the house. If you have any questions, please email me back. There was an ad on this website and they offer a 30-day.

1 mom found this helpful

Been there and done that! Let me tell you what the problem is. The problem is "everyone". Why are you heeding their advice now? You are already doing the right thing, against popular opinion, by breast feeding this long. Keep it up! You are already doing the right thing, against popular opinion, by co-sleeping. You are going to raise a healthier, more confident, and psychologically secure and well-adjusted child than "everyone". All long-term breast feeders know that night feedings are the last to go, not the first. It is as nature intended. Same with co-sleeping. Did you know that many, many cultures around the world consider the use of cribs and separate rooms for children nothing less than child abuse? You are doing a great job! You are doing it right. don't start listening to "everyone" now. It is the biggest mistake that first-time moms make. Follow your mommy instincts. As for sleep - you will have plenty of time for that later. :0) Right now you have a wonderful baby boy - yes, he is still a baby. Enjoy him! Mom of four former baby boys, now 26, 23, 21, and 8.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi fellow breastfeeding mom! The best advice I can give you is to never tell anyone how much/little sleep you are getting or how much your son breastfeeds. I had 4 children just like yours and I learned not to discuss the issue even to the point of excluding the truth. People are not going to understand. I am still breastfeeding (at night) my almost 3 year old. She only stopped during the day this past week and still has pretty much the same schedule as your son. It is not easy but some children are apparently wired that way. I can reassure you that all 4 of my children are very healthy, intelligent, social, active and well-spoken. if you are okay with this arrangement and your husband will support you, THEN DONT CHANGE WHAT WORKS FOR YOU.

1 mom found this helpful

I'll start by saying I'm an AP (attachment parenting) parent, and have parented both my kids this way. I have a 4 YO and a 14 mo. old.

I can't tell you how many nights my 4 yo woke me up 8 to 10 times a night, for MONTHS on end between the ages of 14 months until he was around 20 months. It was VERY VERY hard indeed, I was a walking zombie. My bff has a dd the same age as my ds and she used the "Baby Whisper" as her guide. She often questioned my committment to AP. AP is all about listening to your instincts, if something doesn't feel right, don't do it!

She let her DD CIO, forced her to sleep in her own bed, weaned her at 6 months, and never wore her as an infant. My cousin also used the CIO method and sleep trained her DD. Neither of these two women have a close relationship w/ their DD's. Both girls are distant and rarely tell their mommies they love them.

I breastfed my DS until he was 2 1/2, on demand, he slept w/ me until he was 3 when my DD was born. We are very close, he's very affectionate and showers me w/ hugs and kisses all the time. My 14 mo. old DD is also very affectionate and loving. We've had a few nights where she's woke me up 10X a night. It's hard, I think it's mostly due to teething. They also get restless when they hit new milestones, like they want to practice it in their sleep. And there's plain old-fashioned growing pains too. Nursing is a HUGE source of comfort for them, unless they take a paci or have a lovely, neither of my kids had a paci or a lovely. The "Baby Book" by Dr. Sears is a great source of information about AP parenting, all his books are fantastic for that matter, he also has a website and newsletter: http://www.askdrsears.com/
Two other books that were helpful for me were: "The Happiest Toddler on the Block" by Dr. Harvey Karp, and "The No-cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley

Two other things that help us in the night are a white noise machine and a bed massager (sounds crazy I know) mine is by The First Years and it was actually a device designed for cribs, but it works great on my bed too, Google "crib vibrator" there are several makers of these.

HTH

1 mom found this helpful

I nursed on demand pretty much until she said she was done. IWe all got through it and we are a happy HEALTHY (physically and emotionally) family. As she got older (past 2 or so) I did say no or not right this second and she was very patient. At 14 nos I tried to respond to her cues as I always wanted to be there for my daughter and EARN her trust. That's just MY experience for whatever it's worth...This too shall pass. BTW we're still co sleeping. Brst H.

1 mom found this helpful

He is "owning" you at this point. Most pediatricians recommend milk at 12 months and seriously...do you want to be breast feeding a toddler? I can't see any reason why he would be waking up if he is being fed table foods as he should be fed at this age accept that you are giving in. I will be honest with you, it's really damn hard to hear your child cry for you and not give in but you need to be strong and look at the big picture. He needs to learn to sleep on his own and go back to sleep if he wakes up in the middle of the night otherwise you will forever be trying to get a preschooler to sleep and that's even harder because they argue and manipulate for more time. You want your child to be a valued person in this world and part of that is teaching them lessons that may not be easy for us as parents but the only way to teach them. Believe me, you don't want him to own you like this when he is 3 or 4 because it will make him harder to handle and you don't know how hard it will be not to curl up in your bathroom and cry once this begins because it's nothing compared to letting them cry it off at 14 months. We let our son cry it off at 1 year and he still has the capability of owning me from time to time and I couldn't imagine it being worse. We do what we do as parents because we love them and want the best for them no matter how hard it is for us in that moment...that's what being a parent is all about and nobody said it would be easy but for some reason we thought it would be and just have to accept that it's hard but we are doing our job. I wish you and your family the best but most of all I wish you strength because it isn't easy to be a good parent.

1 mom found this helpful