Picky Eating Not Getting Better

Unfortunately you have already set a precedent for the younger one. Also, please don't take this wrong, but you are letting them tell you how to eat. They have taken control. In our home, my girls learned very eat that what I put on the plate has to be tried otherwise no after dinner sweet treat I do not make my kids separate food, they eat what we do. If they really want to eat, they will. You are not leaving them hungry and it is not too mich to request that they try what is on their plate. Sometimes, I will ask my girls, what kind of veggie tonight or what kind of meat (not nuggets or anything). I have a friend whose daughter eats with us a lot and I do not cater to her either. We have chicken, she may have ketchup to help her eat the meat. Some of it for them is texture too so I don't recommend hamburger. The other thing, tell them if they eat the few bites of meat, then they can have something at the table they like (like more moodles, more veggies or fruit), but they do have to try the basics and don't cook their foods. Cook a normal dinner (include something they like) and require they try. Not hurting them, but at this rate, they have the floor and tell you what to do anmd what to eat.

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My oldest is also a picky eater, and is quick to judge a meal by the look of it. My youngest will happily try anything you put in front of her and will pick out the things she likes in just about anything I make. I didn't want my son influencing my daughter's willingness to try anything, nor influencing her natural likes and dislikes. My hubby and I came up with a few ground rules for meal times that have been working well for our family.

The rules at meal time in my house are that you have to try everything on your plate, and everyone needs to eat what they will with no complaints about the rest. I do not offer food later in the evening if my kids are hungry unless they have followed these rules without a battle. I have been known to wrap up a plate of food for the complaining child and present it to them the next time they are hungry. If it is a new dish, no one is allowed to make any comments about it until everyone has tried it, then we go around the table and talk about what we like and don't like about it. Then we take a vote as to whether it should be made again, or any modifications that may make it tastier... like adding M&Ms, of course!! If the vote came to a tie, I will make it a second time. The adults have more say than the kids do, for obvious reasons. These rules, along with the wrapping of plates which I did a lot at the beginning, have made dinner much more pleasant. My son is still picky and gives funny looks, but at least we don't get the complaining anymore.

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Read "Child of Mine: Feeding With Love and Good Sense" by Ellyn Satter. It covers feeding infants as well, but has a lot of good information about feeding toddlers and pre-school age children. Good Luck!

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I come from a family that had 7 kids. My mother refused to be a short order cook. She made ONE meal, and if we didn't like, we were free not to eat it.

But we never had snacks, and our next meal was the next time we got to eat.

So, if we didn't like dinner, we got to not eat it. And we went hungry until breakfast.

We refused few meals.

Try it. No kid starves themselves to death, and stop being a slave to your kid.
.

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I bought a cookbook called "Deceptively Delicious" -- where you kind of hide nutritious foods in "appealing" food by purreeing veggies and then either mixing them in to things like brownies, or using it for breading on "chicken fingers" etc. The author said to continue putting the veggies on everyone's plate, so that they learn to eat them over time (and see mom and dad eating them), but this way they're getting their vitamins and eating w/o a big fight.

Okay how did your mom get you to eat one bite. My mom made us always eat one bite of everything on our plates. She did it because she was the mom and we did what she told us to do. She didn't beg us or bribe us...but she would swat our bottoms if we were defiant.

In our house you have to try everything on your plate. One bite. You have to finish at least one item of food (and I never put more than a tablespoon of each item on their plate...they are 5 and 3...little tummies).

I know it is not popular today to force kids to try things, do what you tell them to do, or punish them for defying you, but it worked for generations of kids before us...but for some reason we think now we know better. I would have to differ since kids today have gone nuts. Kids today shoot eachother at school. Kids today beat eachother up over tennis shoes. Kids today pitch temper tantrums in stores. Kids today yell and scream at their parents and tell them what to do.

Growing up I never saw a parent begging their kids to behave. I never saw kids shooting eachother down and every family I knew owned guns and went hunting. I never saw kids yelling at their parents.

So at any rate, do it the way your mom did it. It worked for you and you aren't scared emotionally. So what you puked one time. You are fine.

I got sick on an omelet once. I love the things and have loved them since I was in middle school. I eat anything. I love veggies, fruit, and I will try anything put in front of me. I am adventurous in the kitchen...always trying a new recipe.

Why is that? Because my mom always made us try one bite. Presenting a food 10 times is not going to work. They have to eat a bite of the food 10 times. I can look at something all day long and not want it. My hubby and his six siblings are the pickiest eaters on the planet. They won't try new things. They have terrible health problems due to a limited diet. Why? Because their father told their mother that if they didn't want to eat something they didn't have to. She was a short order cook and fixed things for each that they would eat. They lived off of cereal and the few fruits they would eat.

Listen to your instincts. You know what is best.

I agree that this could be sensory issues - could be very minor. Google Sensory Integration Disorder. She might be legitimately wildly offended by certain textures, tastes, smells.

My son has this and I understand first hand how frustrating it can be, but hang in there. He prefers what I like to call "clean" foods (and nothing touching - ever!): fruits, veggies, fish. Barilla Plus is a good pasta with extra protein, omega 3s and fiber. He eats it plain.

We do the one bite rule or no dessert. My kids are not allowed junk food until after a good day of eating healthy. Dessert is not always cookies and candy either, b/c we do not have much of that in the house, but jello or fruit, yogurt etc....

Good luck

We have the "try you never know you might like it" It really isn't a rule we just say hey you might like it and tell how older brother and us (the parents)have done just that. I am lucky not have picky eaters we just encourage them to try everything at least once and it seems to work. If they insist they don't like it we drop it for now and move on. Just try it you'll never know if you like something if you don't try it. We do it with food we know they will like and this encourages them to try things they are not sure of. It also gets easier as they get older

I was the WORST picky eater out there and VERY stubborn. If it was a battle of the wills I always won. But now I eat a lot more foods. Over time, I slowly got bored with the limited options and got curious. Also, seeing people eat stuff for years and years made me curious and as my tastes changed, I tried more. I think the key thing is constantly exposing them to different foods and letting them see you and others eat them. Texture and smell were big for me. I just had some mental hangups, too about trying some things and it really depended on how they were prepared. Try using fresh herbs and spices. Have you thought of having her "help" you prepare the foods? I've heard this can persuade them to try it if they helped make it. SOmetimes. Also, I would completely stop the breaded meats. Some people just never really like meat and she's probably only eating it for the breading. Why should she have anything else if that's offered? Get rid of it. I hate to tell you but she already eats way more than I did at her age. If you are concerned about her protein intake make her eggs or french toast in the morning, incorporate nuts and yogurt into her lunch and legumes into her dinner. Meat is not the only source of protein. Have you heard of the grain quinoa? There are bunches of ways to incorporate it into a meal and it's really good for everyone. Also, could it be that you make the meat too rare or overdone for her taste? THere are great recipes on allrecipes.com, just type in a word like "quinoa" or "protein". Good luck!

She's not "set in her ways" yet. Don't let her get that way. Tell your kids that it's time for mommy to start supper and let them help. Start with what they like. Let them lay out the chicken nuggets on a sheet pan. Let the little one scrub the baked potatoes and let her poke holes in them for the oven or microwave. Let them both snap green beans or put corn in a pan and the other one put a couple pats of butter. Let them place dinner rolls (from a can is fun) on the baking sheet, ect. They enjoy helping and being with you and tend to try eating what they have made. p.s. sprinkle a little sugar on the corn before heating and a pinch of salt. Also, the next time you have chicken, buy tenders and let them dip in seasoned egg annd seasoned flour. Then bake (high temp.) until crispy. Cook those greens and make them tasty. A little garlic powder with salt and pepper go a long way on asperagus, green beans, brussle sprouts, cauliflower, etc. When steamed soft enough for them to hold but not mushy, a little olive oil and a squeeze of lemon. Again, let them do it.....very important...quality time also. Their beef can be hamburger patties. Pork chop is fun to hold. They'll learn later to use forks for these things. Let then have fun in the mean time.

If your daughter is doing awesome at eating fruits and veggie's she is doing great compared to my kids! As far as wasting food I was very frustrated, too, but I have learned to make only enough to feed myself, my husband and one serving that my two children can split (which is a very small serving since kids can rarely eat more than a fistfull of food during one sitting). It's when my son asks for something specific and then tells me he doesn't want it for what ever reason that I make him sit at the table longer than normal...although he sometimes still doesn't eat it. Don't force it, you are doing great by just keeping your cool and giving them the foods you would like to see them eating eventually. BTW, I think the Super Nanny is only effective because she is an unfamiliar person setting new and sometimes harsh rules for children to abide by while they are being videotaped! I bet that the behavior is not maintained for long after the show...

My guess is that she probably has some sensory issues. Hot dogs, fish and chicken nuggets hardly feel like meat when chewing them. It's a huge step from there to steak or a large hunk of chicken. I would recommend trying things that will break down the fibers of the meat so it isn't so tough and maybe mixed in with other items to slowly introduce it. For example... home made chicken soup with the chicken cut up really tiny and mixed in with noodles is a lot less threatening to a kid with sensory issues than chicken with a side of noodles... but if you slowly introduce it, and get chicken soup down okay, then slowly transition in terms of meat ratio and size... eventually you can get to chicken with a side of noodles.

My 5 year old just went through this, claiming she hated everything and we inforced the one bite rule and found that she eats most everything. She is not allowed anything else to eat if she does not try a bite, we dont dwell on it, we tell her and if we leave her alone, she will usually try it and if she likes it, we dont hear from her, she eats, if she truly does not like it, she lets us know. But we do not allow her to be our focal point at dinner. We talk about how good the food is, or how we will enjoy our dessert since we ate our meal and it usually works. A lot of time, she would do it for attention, we dont give her attention that way anymore and we have not fought that battle in a while. It is hard at first, it is emotional, I would get so frustrated and want to scream, but I would have to calmly remind her that if she did not try it, she would get nothing else to eat for the night. Dont make it a battle of the wills, be calm in what you say and enforce it and they will stop :)
Hope this helped!
M.

My older son is a picky eater (4 yrs old) and I have him take either a bite or a certain number of bites of one thing before he can have another. For example, if he wants more noodles he has to have a bite of broccoli. This usually works but we had to work up to him even allowing some types of food onto his plate (he used to have some sensory issues with food). I don't think that just serving a food to a child will make them eventually eat it (maybe just reinforce the negative association). I think it's a combination of having them try it (even if it's just a little bit) and also providing them with good role models (parents, siblings, friends) who eat a variety of foods.

I know there's hope because I was the pickiest eater in the world and I now eat more variety then either of my parents and more vegetables than any of my sisters!

Hang in there!

Have her help pick out recipes and help cook. Even shop and plant tomatoes. If kids are involved with the prep they will at least try it.

My 5 year old is still a picky eater. We started a chart for trying new foods. He gets a sticker for each new food he tries, and when he tries 5, he gets a small surprise. He'll sometimes go months without trying anything, and then he'll suddenly request 10 new things in a day (trickier than it sounds!). Also, we don't make special meals. I provide lots of sides I know he'll eat, and if he won't eat the entree, so be it. No 5 year old has ever starved themselves to death.

We have have certain house rules when it comes to eating. The biggest one is we try everything once. No matter what. If we don't like after 2 bites, fine. Will try it again later. The next rule is I never make food for them. When I make dinner, there is no "well I don't think they'll like it or she won't eat it." If mom and dad are having salmon, so are the kids. If they try it and don't like it, fine they can be excused but there are no snacks and they can't eat until the next meal. If they get hungry they can eat their dinner. It may sound harsh, but it works. I have 3 kids (6,5,2) that eat salmon, fried calamari, Chinese, Japanese, even sushi. It is important to serve them a constant variety of foods so they don't get used to only the same old stuff. The other thing to be aware of is that kids may say I don't like simply because they aren't hungry. If a child eats 4 bites and says I don't want anymore. It is not the end of the world. Children, unlike adults, listen to their bodies and most have the ability to realize they don't need the extra food or can tell themselves when it is too much. You may have noticed how some kids put on a few extra pounds by eating alot before a growth spurt. The rule of eat everything on your plate is not healthy for kids or adults. It is a very hard habit to break. Stick with it- if your child doesn't like greenbeans try cooking them in a lot of different ways, maybe once you find a way they like it, they'll realize it is not all that bad. That's how mined learned to like spinach. Good Luck!

Hey J. -

I can relate. My four year old son is very picky...very. I started a tradition over the winter that he finds so much fun. Unlike your daughter, he started growing out of his veggies, and wouldn't even eat the ones he use to love. I also couldn't get him to eat hamburger meat, real chicken and other things. So, I decided one night for dinner I was going to allow him to cook with me. I gave him paper and crayon and told him what we could be cooking and asked him to make everyone at the table a menu of such things. He thougt that was great...an hour before dinner. Then, after he places all menus on the table, I have him help in all the safe ways of cooking that he can. If we have chicken, he sprinkles on all the spices, and oils the pan for me. For the hamburgers, he helps make the patty and makes whatever shape he wants for his own and his brothers. We do this with every meal that we make... as long as he is interested in helping...which he usually is always. Since I have started this, I call it Mikey's resteraunt, and he trys everything. I told him it is not polite to ignore what chef Mikey has prepared for us, and he needs to at least try it. He usually ends up liking it very much. He loves to cook, bake and create concocktions, so I knew this might be a success with him. Maybe you can try something like this with your daughter...make her feel like she is a part of the process and maybe if it gets her excited about the meal, she will at least try things...you never know...and love it. He loves to eat Mickey bergers as he calls them, dino chicken, and many other things now. The veggies he mixes in with his other food, and it just goes down with it...yeaaaa! :) Try it, let me know what you and your daughter think. It's silly, but fun. Just start dinner a little earlier...then tend to slow the process down a bit. :)

Best of luck
Crystal

I've heard it called 'positive reinforcement' but frankly its bribery, and it works so much better and happily than punishment. My 5 year old son is the exact same eater-type as your daughter. His only source of protein for most of his life was chicken nuggets, fish sticks and yogurt. Then one day walmart had a sale on matchbox cars and I stocked up. The next time I made pork tenderloin, I challenged my son to taste it. If he didn't like it that's ok, but if he tried it, he got a nice surprise and I would go to my secret stash and get him a car. Sometimes, he would like it and I would offer him a second prize if he ate 5 more bites. If he didn't want to try it, that's his deal, but no prize. More often he was willing to do anything for a new toy. And he was completely in control. We've gotten him to try steak, grilled chicken, even meatloaf! Just remember to keep it a positive experience and that you, too, have certain flavors that don't sit well on your palate.

SuperNanny isn't living with you, doesn't pay your bills and isn't helping you at home with your daughter. I think I'd go with hubby's thinking.

We enforce the one bite rule at our home too. We have a 4yo who is a great eater most of the time, but our 2yo has always been a picky eater. We've tried everything and finally started doing the one bite rule. If she takes a bite, then she can get down from the table. This was awful and she screamed and cried and practically gagged the first few times we did it. After that, she started taking her bite sooner. After about 10 days of being consistent for about 10 days, she will now take the bite fairly willingly and we've even seen her taking more bites before wanting down...then we can still convince her to take "one more bite" before she can actually get down. This does not necessarily mean she eats or takes a bite willingly every night, but more often than not. Sometimes, depending on what she's eaten throughout the day, I will make something else for her to eat later in the evening, when she's more hungry. We try not to do this too often though because we don't want her to think that she gets her own meal whenever she wants it. She's still picky, but now eats a bit more often...sometimes even more than nuggets and french fries!

Hope that helps. Good luck!

I have 2 boys - 8 & 5. They both were great eaters as babies, okay my 5 year old didn't like some veggies, but there was nothing the 8 year old wouldn't eat. Once my oldest hit 2 he got picky and gor more picky over time - wouldn't eat meat unless you count breaded (chicken nuggets, fish sticks). My youngest is still a good eater most of the time, just not big on breakfast (think cheese stick/gogurt typically).

Like yours, my oldest eats lot of fruits & veggies (okay is a mac & cheese snob too - won't eat leftover m&c typically or my homemade version). I know many moms whose kids are carnivores and seriously lacking on the f&v front. So, this is a good thing. Up until a year ago, he wouldn't eat hot dogs even and I tried all different ways including bribing, but if I forced him to try things he could make himself gag, spit up, cry, etc... I gave up. I have come to the realizations that he is a super taster and I see some of this in my husband too with some of his food preferences. I'd cook him separate dinner/include an item he liked and could eat as a main course and at times feed the kids separately (more appetizing for me & DH). There were times that I got fed up and I didn't feel like it. I'd provide f&v and say this is what we are eating and if you don't like it you can have cereal. Because if he didn't eat, he would get real crabby and he is tall & skinny and burns energy and I felt really needed food to grow.

Now at 8, I can get him to try more stuff, still not super open minded. He seems to have moved on from chicken nuggets - preferring strips and lightly breaded chicken breasts - mind you not if I make them - these are all bought prepared! He doesn't consistently eat my gound turkey tacos (loves taco bell soft shell with cheese, no lettuce). I make sure he has yogurt, eggs (loves eggs & breakfast food), cheese & nuts and he takes a vitamin daily. But he is a good size and when he is hungry he eats.

Just wait till you have school lunch - he told me recently he doesn't like the school pizza which means he only buys 3 times a month. I try to make sure he has a hearty breakfast before heading off. His lunch consists of cheese & crackers (doesn't like bread - don't ask - he used to eat uncrustables but won't eat PB&J if I make it), hard boiled egg or yogurt then a cheese stick or gogurt (frozen if summer time), some cucumber slices, some fresh fruit or a container of canned fruit when I run out of fresh and a snack of sorts (pretzels, little bites, cheese crackers, etc...).

He knows this bugs me and while I don't rub it in, there are days I remind him ... hey, we are human.

Tonight's dinner: chicken fajitas, beans, chips & homemade guacamole, potatoes & fruit. What he had - cheese quesedilla, fruit, chips and a tiny, tiny taste of guac ;-). There are a few meals we can all eat as a family: ravioli, lasagna (he'll eat the meat in our homemade one and believe it or not the whole wheat vegetarian they sell at Costco is one of his favorites), pizza, Kosher hot dogs and Chinese takeout ;-)

Relax and she'll come around - as long as she eats her F&V.

Feel free to contact me if you need a sounding board or just to vent.

M.

Hi J.--
I commiserate with you--I think of my 3 year old as a somewhat picky eater as well. I have also tried to get him to "just try" something new--sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. However, I just brought him to a holistic doctor for allergy testing and she mentioned that sometimes when kids won't eat something (without even trying it), it's because they are allergic/sensitive to it. For instance, my son is allergic to eggs which according to my doctor, makes him sensitive to other foods with high sulfur content, i.e. broccoli, cauliflower, asparagus, onions and garlic. So I don't want to force him to eat something that doesn't agree with him, but sometimes It's hard for me to tell the difference between sensitivity to a food and just not wanting to try it. Perhaps getting your daughter tested for food sensitivity might shed some light on her "pickiness." However, if your daughter is awesome on fruits and veggies, that's a huge step in the right direction!!
Best of luck to you,
B.

you got great advice. my two older ones (4 1/2 and 3) have both gone through good eater/picky eater stages and they both are good about different types of food. i agree with the 1 -3 bite rule. its tough to implement at first but once its established it makes dinner easier and may eventually lead to successful eating. i agree with beginning with less favorable foods first to be able to eat the favorite foods. And finally, to avoid throwing out picked-over food, do what most mothers do: eat the leftovers when the kids are done. i serve myself a small plate expecting that i will be eating someone's leftovers. good luck!

Have you tried non-meat protein? There are plenty of vegetarian meals she could try that would give her the protein. My sons went through a phase like this and I never enforced eating the meat - seemingly as a result they are both very physically small. My son is 7 an in a class full of 6 year olds he is still the smallest one. Protein is very important! Get some down her somehow no matter what course of action you choose to apply.

I have found that if I make food "fun" then I can get the pickiest of eaters to eat just about anything.
Green Eggs and Ham? Seriously. It works like a charm.
Blue makes baked chicken with pineapple "Blue Hawaii".

Tuna salad in a hot dog bun with three mini sweet pickles in it is Three Men in a Boat. (Sometimes there is a sail made from a leafy stalk of celery.)

I don't like the idea of "breaking" them. I like to think what might make them curious enough to at least try. If they try it and STILL don't like it then I have to accept they really don't like it and I work with other things.

My mother used the approach of wearing me down. I was served a plate of food. If I didn't eat it then I didn't eat. If dinner was over and I hadn't eaten then it would be served to me again the next day. As I got older if I didn't like what was cooked then I could fix my own meal. But, she made sure that the easy to cook things were far out of my reach.
It worked pretty well and turned me into a pretty god cook to-boot.

Good luck!!

K~

Well, first of all - you're not a "bad mom"!! You're being a very good mom and this is causing alot of inner conflict for you!

We all have "had" or are "having" problems like this one. I have three older children (18, 16 & 14) and went through the same thing that you are going through now, and they are still alive and kicking - eating everything in their path!

I used to fix a "different meal" for my husband and myself and one that I knew they would eat - buying two sets of groceries. After awhile, I simply said - "enough" and just made one dinner meal. I was exhaused and it just made it difficult to go out to any nice family dinner other then McDonald's or Burger King.

This is the "test of wills" between you and your daughter. My daughter (age 18 years) and son(age 16 years) were exactly the same as yours - stubborn! I knew they weren't going to starve and just kept putting the food in front of them - cut into small pieces - letting them know that there would be no desert if they didn't at least try the food. I also let them know that I would fix "one to two meals of week" of foods that we "all" enjoyed - so they could look forward to their favoites.

Well, I got the throwing up, the convulsing, the crying, etc. but I stayed "calm", did my dishes - as my husband ususally left the table as he couldn't take it. Because I didn't respond in any way that let them know how much I was being hurt by this too - they eventually ate what I put in front of them without any fuss. Now, I can't get them to stop eating!

Be patient, know that you're not alone and stay "calm". If they know that you'll cave in easiliy, it's only going to get worse and you'll be a "slave" to their eating habits forever.

Just know that "you're in charge" not your children and this is a habit that has developed over the course of time. It will also take time to alter their eating habits for the better, so be patient.

Remember, when you're raising your children - you are also raising your "grand children".

You're going to survive and do great! Hopefully, you're kids will develope bad habits like mine did - eating lobster, king crab, filet, etc.

Oh my, if I could do one thing over.....I have a 10 year old that eats everything and tries it all. She is a super eater, but on the other hand my two boys (ages 11 and 13) have come very little in improving their eating of different foods. My 13 year old hasn't had a piece of meat in 10 years and doesn't eat rice, beans, spaghetti, just a lot of crackers. We call him a carbohydratian instead of a vegetarian. He is almost 6 foot tall and super skinney. It really stinks to always pick a restaurant that has pizza or french fries. My other son is just a tad bit better and will eat bacon, hot dogs, chicken nuggets and pizza. We joke with him that one day he will be glowing from all the nitrates. Not funny though....Neither of my boys will even drink a smoothie. Believe me, the super nanny would have a laugh at my house. We have tried making them sit there until they try to eat and that ends up 2 hours later they are still sitting there and no food digested. We have taken away privileges, bed time, you name it. The fact of the matter is I blew it. (Won't admit that to my husband.) I didn't force them earlier and now I am paying dearly for it. I am also a short order cook.....don't be one. Make them eat what you eat....you will happy with yourself I promise.

How funny there are two posts regarding topics that appeared on Supernanny last night! I loved that show.

I don't believe in forcing kids to eat, my parents tried that with me and it made me an even pickier eater and that has carried on into my adult life. However, I do believe that kids should be asked to try up to 3 bites of a new food. Then they should not have to eat anymore if they do not want to. I thought Supernanny was right in her approach as those kids had been ruling the dinner table for a long time and she had to make a turnaround for that family in a short amount of time. That little girl reminded me of me though when she fell asleep two hours later at the table! LOL

I do the one bite rule with my two year olds and it's fairly effective in getting my pickier eater to try new things. I do that and I keep introducing new foods. I know what you mean about throwing out good food.

One thing I think I would change if I were you is not allowing her to eat more than one serving of the foods she does like if she refuses to try a new food. I would just calmly explain that no seconds will be offered until the new food is tried. If she won't try the new food that is her "choice" and she needs to be reminded that she is the one that made that choice to not try anything new so therefore she can't have seconds of what she does like.

When I have read up on offering new foods I have read to offer a new food with two other foods your child does like but if they choose not to try the new food then they can't have any more servings of the others they do like. That makes sense to me. As long as you keep your cool and seem indifferent and put it back on them that they are making that choice I think you will find some success. Good luck!

J.,
Unfortunately i think we all go through this...unless you are your childs own short order cook. My four year old daughter has similar issues. We do practice the one or two bite rule and then she knows that she can say no thank you if she doesn't care for the food. I think like anything else, it may be hell the first couple times you enforce it but once she knows that is the rule she will come around. Also, i think if you handle it gently and calmly she will respond better. In most cases, when we make it a huge deal...so will the child. Hope this helps!

what I make for dinner is whats for dinner. SImple- dont eat dinner no dessert. if its the first time my children are trying something they have to have 3 bites and if they dont like it I will put some leftovers from the night before on their plate. If I make something I know my children dont like then they get leftovers from another night. the first time my kids went without dessert was enough for them. they pretty much eat what I serve- sometimes they are to full and tell me they are to full for dessert anyway without finishing their plate. thats ok with me. as of yesterday I had to put a time on dinner. my 5 year old is so pokey. so now dinner is over at 630. you dont finish your dinner by 630- no dessert. 45 min to eat is plenty of time. my son cried for less then 2 min and then went to play. I couldnt believe how easy it was!

Perhaps you could have your daughter help grocery shop and cook dinner?

Hi J.,
I am a mother of 3 boys and work with nutrition. I am no expert, however, you did say she eats frutis and veggies? Does she get a wide variety? If so, and they are not overcooked, she is doing great, getting tons of nutritients and phytonutrients she needs. We have a rule as long as they eat their fruits and veggies being served they have done a good thing for their bodies. By increasing the amounts of fruits and veggies given to her, that should fill her up. You might want to try the one bite rule, if no bites are taken, no snack is given and stick to it.
N. - Nutrition Naturally
www.jp4ahealthieryou.com

oh sorry i see that you saw the show. I think the point the nanny was trying to get across is the hole stubborn and control issues that you need to nip and get control of for things to work and then once they see wwho is in charge after many challenges they will just do it and obey with out a fight. does that make sense? My kids have the one bite rule too or they just ahve to touch their lips since they have food allergies incase they are not eating due to a reaction. mine is a little more tricky. also you should look into her cravign the carbs I bet she has too much yeast in her system andt hat is why she wants those foods and not the protein with out the carb on it. Get her on an allergy free probiotic. Provera inc makes one by Klaire labs and watch the differnce in your child in a day!
J.

I am so jealous. My picky eater doesn't even eat fruit and veggies except for strawberries and grapes. If your daughter is eating fruit and veggies but won't eat meat that really is o.k. Just find protein in other foods and offer that. I run a daycare and I would have a perfect life it we could just skip the meals. I feel your pain and I hate to admit it but I am bribing my 8 year old to eat one weeks worth of food without complaining and then he is rewarded with a book. It is thursday today and he only has to make it until Sunday it seems to be working. My picky 5 year old will now lick the food with the tip of his tongue but that is all the farther he will go. It really is a game of who can outlast who. It was partially my fault because I catered to their dads pickiness and now I have 2 picky eaters. Just keep eating and learn to let go.
Kristi

I have four children and my husband and we give them the food that we know that they are not going to want to eat FIRST and tell them that they can't have the rest of the stuff that they do like until they have at least tried that first food. That usually works and we can get at least one bite down them. So in essence it is using your one bite rule. And we do this with every meal. So this is also following your pediatrician's advice by introducing them to a certain food over and over and who knows, they may eventually learn to like it. Besides, if she's eating fruit and veggies and you are concerned about her protein, then give her more green leafy veggies, hard boiled eggs (or scrambled if she'll eat them) or nuts if she doesn't have an allergy. And it doesn't have to be at dinner time. Make it ia snack and then you know she's getting a balanced diet.

Have her help plan the meals for your family. And if she chooses it and then says no, well this is what is being served tonight. She of course as to consider others or you will end up like me. Read on....

Let me share my life. I have husband who will not eat any poultry, and only certain beef/ pork products.
We tend to stay away from pork products anyway because a pig is not a very clean animal. They are considered a scrounger. But if cook it in kraut he will eat a little. Hubby will eat soup except with poultry and loves yogurt but as to be Dannon fruit on the Bottom Mixed Berry.
My son will not eat any fish, hates 70% of veggies. Prefers raw over cooked veggies. Will eat some fruits but not a lot. If not much of a pork eater either but give him a steak and you will be friends for life. Doesn't like soups but love yogurt but has to be yoplait custard style Strawberry. Blackberry and cherry.

My husband will only eat rye bread, my son 100 whole wheat.

So I cook a lot of double meals. One for Hubby and One for son. I choose to do this because I love them. but what a pain.

I eat ever I feel like that night. With Hubby or Son, once in a while they both like what is being served. Yah!

S.

Dear J. M. I don't mean to be such a stickler but it seems as if you're not in control of the children,they're in conrol of you. I am a mother of 2, now ages 15&18. I also fostered for several year and had my god-children in my custody for awhile. They were all taught to eat what was put before you. My God-children were not use to eating certain things but when you don't give in you win. Even if it means that you have to cut out mid day snacks and sweets for awhile the child will learn that you mean business and began to comply. Please don't allow them to continue in this fashion or you will later pay when they become older. Children know which buttons to push if they think your soft and can get away with it. I also was an educator for awhile of first graders, trust me I know how little people operate, Best wishes in your growing up.

Is she growing normally? If so, who cares? People all over the world have different diets, quite limited in some countries. There is no particular virtue in eating a lot of different foods or being adventurous. Also, protein is overrated - most Americans get too much anyway, so if she doesn't eat much meat, it's not a problem.

The fact that you are throwing away food suggests that you are fighting it and making what you think are appropriate portions. I would still offer her different foods, just tiny amounts. I think it is unspeakably cruel to force a kid to eat any particular food. The fact that you once threw up in your plate speaks of great cruelty to me. Please don't do that to your kids. Nothing but eating disorders can result from force-feeding, which is often used as a form of torture. And not being excused from the table until they try food is really an unnecessary level of control - I don't care how "super" the nanny is supposed to be.

If you suspect your daughter is trying to control you, the key is to be as unconcerned as possible. Don't let her get you all emotional about what is actually a pretty trivial issue!

If the doctor says your daughter is growing and developing normally, then don't sweat it. I was a picky eater when I was younger and it turns out that I'm okay. My family did notice that I had a lot of food allergies. My son also did the same thing, he would lick something I cooked and throw it away. I just adjusted my cooking to only fix them things they like and fix my husband what he likes. It's temporary. Enjoy her being five, my daughter just turned 16 and it just goes so fast. Food is now the least of my worries :0