Pet Owners' Thoughts Needed - Knowing When to Say goodbye--EDIT

I am literally RIGHT THERE with you with respect to my 12 yo dog.

My vet appointment is tomorrow to see if there is anything else going on (beyond him just being old).

I send healing thoughts, and the hope that you have the clarity to make the best decision for your dog.

I am sending the same thoughts to ME!

Keep us posted!

That's a hard call. Personally I'd take the dog home and wait until she starts to slow down or show signs that she's just not herself. Then I'd feed her burgers and take her to her favorite spot and then head over to the vet's office to put her down. As pet caretakers it's not our job to keep them alive as long as possible. It's our job to give them the best quality of life we can until the end. She's at the end now. Surgery may prolong it a bit but ultimately she's going to die from cancer. Make the best of her time before that happens.

You have probably already made your decision, but I wanted to add my two cents in case it matters:

We did do surgery on our dog a few years ago (for something different than yours, though). She did make it another year - but her quality of life during that year was terrible. I finally had to have her put down. I wish I would have let her go instead of doing the surgery. My heart was in the right place, but honestly I was being selfish for me - I didn't want to lose her.

I hope that whatever you decide works for you and your family - best of luck through this difficult time.

This is such a tough position to be in, and while every dog & every situation is different, I had to make the same decision for one of my own just 2 weeks ago.

You don't mention what type of tumor is on the spleen, or the symptoms that caused you to have her checked out by your vet. Some tumors are more 'operable' than others. My dog had hemangiosarcoma, which is a tumor of the blood vessels, & the prognosis 6months post surgery was only ~30%. So we made the decision to say our goodbyes. I was very fortunate that she was able to hold on 3 extra days so I could come back home & be with her.

Here are some facts - Older dogs have a more difficult time in recovery of any surgery than a younger dog, all things being equal. Anesthesia works against the immune system, so there is a greater chance of infection post-op. Large breed dogs have an average life span of 10-12 years, making life-saving measures late in life a diminishing return in exchange for the risk.

Specifically to your situation, here is the information page I used to make some of the decisions for my own dog, & also one of my puppy owners in the past few months: http://www.veterinarypartner.com/Content.plx?P=A&A=13...

If you know the type of tumor, you can click on the hyperlinks within that article for more information regarding treatment & outcomes of hemangiosarcoma & lymphosarcoma.

You are asking for advice, what I as an owner would do. Here it is:

I would make an appointment with your vet to let your dog cross over the Rainbow Bridge. She has led a good, long, loving life with your family. At her age, the risks of surgery are great. The amount of time you might buy through a successful surgery will be limited, & also require significant recovery.

Any vet will tell you what they "can" do for your dog (or cat or other family pet). But they aren't the ones that are going to tell you what you "should" do, and that burden is so hard as a pet owner. We love them, they are part of our family, and the greatest worry is saying goodbye too soon.

But my husband & I have always said, we would rather say goodbye too soon, than too late. If our girl was 5, we would have gone ahead with an attempted surgery. But at 11 years, it just wasn't worth it to have her last few months with us not be spent in perfect health, or worse, have to lose her on the operating table without a chance to say goodbye & let her go with dignity.

All that said, if you & your family decide to go ahead with the surgery tomorrow, that is OK too. I can only share what I have done, & would do, & my reasons for it. I have a friend who nursed her dog for 3 years through a condition that is the same as ALS in dogs. I've known others who let their dogs go peacefully in the early stages of the same disease. I can't & won't judge, because everyone's situation is different, & every dog is an individual, with their own abilities to fight with a positive spirit.

So, I hope this was helpful in some way. I will be praying for you & your family tomorrow, that whatever decision you come to, it is the best one for your beloved girl. T.

Three years ago my 12 year old boxer/shepherd acted "off" for exactly one day. Fortunately I have great access to veterinary care (I came from the vet industry and my SO is a veterinary internist. We diagnosed a hemangiosarcoma in her spleen and part of her heart. There're was no way is was going to take her home and have this thing explode. It is so fast growing. We didn't even know she was ill but had to make the kind and loving decision to euthanize her right there...for her. I couldn't let her suffer and no way was I going to let that tumor explode at home. Surgery was never an option for me.

Good luck, I'm sorry for your situation.

This is one of the most difficult decisions a good pet owner must make for their furry family member. We have had to say goodbye to two dogs over the past 26 years, both were heart breaking decisions but right for the dogs.

Find peace in knowing that this is a caring and loving decision for your sweet girl. Love on her and give her the best days of her life. She will always remain in your hearts.

I would not put a dog that old through major surgery. I would let her go.

I put them down before the suffering starts. It's super hard at that time too because it seems too early but I can't stand the thought of my animals hurting. We have had 3 German Shepherds and each of them lived until 12. 12 for a dog that big is a GREAT run. Seems that's always been the max for mine. Your vet can guide you. It breaks your heart and I'm so sorry.

We had a doberman who got loose and got hit. Broke his hip pretty badly. The vet said surgery could be done to repair his hip but it would be expensive and there was a strong possibility it would change his personality. He would also never walk completely properly again. The decision was made to put him down.

You have given your dog a wonderful life with lots of love. In my opinion the most loving and kind thing to do would be to allow her to pass peacefully with love surrounding her. She's an elderly dog and the surgery is going to be h*** o* her no matter what they find.

Good luck with your decision.

This is a very tough thing to decide. We've been through it twice with 2 of our cats. With our first we tried treating him in case it wasn't lymphoma. We got a little more time with him before it became obvious it was his time to go. We came home from a doctor's appointment to find he could no longer walk and was stuck on the bathroom floor. We probably should have let him go sooner but he just didn't seem ready to go yet. With our second we woke up one morning and saw she had growths on her mouth. Brought her in and it turned out to be an aggressive cancer. If she was younger the vet might have considered surgery but she was 14 and the tumors would most likely just come back with a vengeance. We let her go that afternoon.
Will this surgery really improve your pups quality of life? Will he be able to recover from the surgery or will he have lingering effects? To give my honest opinion, there are far too many things that could go wrong vs right if you choose to have the surgery. It sounds like your vet is trying to find the most gentle way of putting it while leaving the ultimate choice to you as it's your dog. We asked our vet to be blunt and in our case was respectfully told that if it was their pet they would let them go. I would ask your vet to be frank with you. They are the experts and see this all the time and, unless they just want to make easy cash off of you, they will tell you their honest truth opinion if asked.
We all want our fur babies to live forever. Sadly they can not. The best we can do is give them the best life possible for as long as they are with us and to never forget them once they are gone.
Peace to you and your family while you make this very hard decision.

aw, sweetie. damn. i'm SO sorry.
in this case, with a dog of this age, i'd schedule a come-to-your-house vet this weekend, give her a rocking rollicking treat-filled few days, and let her go.
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khairete
S.

We were in the exact same situation last December; 9 yo dog, fast growing tumor, rapid deterioration, doubtful he would even survive surgery and if we went ahead and more tumors were found they wouldn't wake him up. We chose to have him put to sleep, that way we could hold him and say goodbye. Heartbreaking decision, but in the end the most humane thing for him and most comforting for us since we were there with him. There is no easy choice in this situation, you have to do what you can live with. I am so sorry, you're in my prayers.

I think there are worse things in life than death and that is needless suffering. For pets that can not understand what is happening but can feel pain from surgery or disease I think this holds true.

I'm so sorry and I wish you peace as you make this difficult decision.

Splenectomy is a fairly straightforward surgery in the dog and most are home in a couple of days feeling as good or better than they did before hand. That said, median survival (meaning 1/2 live longer and half don't live as long) for dogs with hemangiosarcoma (the most common malignant splenic tumor) is 3-4 months. This is doubled with chemotherapy with a chance of 1 year survival. Approximately 1/2 of splenic tumors are malignant based upon the literature although most veterinarians believe more than 1/2 are malignant. Splenectomy will be curative for those dogs whose tumor is benign. The ONLY accurate way to know if the tumor is malignant is to remove it and submit is for histopathology. Ultrasound, x-rays and visual examination are NOT accurate in predicting malignancy.

Most dogs have a normal quality of life following splenectomy until the point the tumor recurs. However for most this time is fairly short and it is your call whether a predicted 3-4 months justifies the financial expense.

Oh gosh, I SO feel your pain. There's no easy way out of this, is there?

Our terrier got bone cancer at 13.5 - shocking because it's a "big dog" disease so they weren't even looking for it at first. It was in her shoulder, and we debated amputating her leg and part of her shoulder, but we knew she would be confused and in agony for a while. If she'd be 5 or 7, we might have made a different decision. While we debated briefly, we actually decided fairly soon not to torture her. Meantime, the cancer took off and went into her lungs and so there was not going to be any longevity. We chose to manage her pain, and she died in our arms after a few days of losing control of her bodily functions. It was peaceful and we know, from the way she looked at us, that she was comforted being held by us as she gave her last breath. We were going to take her in to be euthanized, but that blessed dog saved us the agony (and the expense) and allowed herself to die at home. I think she wanted it that way.

I guess you have to ask whether it's going to be painful and frightening to your dog to go through this surgery and have a long recovery. If there's a chance she won't wake up, then you have missed your chance to say goodbye, if you need to do that. I realize it's not just about expense - we would have spent anything if it would have helped her - but she was nearly 14 and there wasn't going to be much quality of life for her. She was a smaller dog, and you have a larger dog (usually with a shorter life span) who is already 12 or so.

If you decide not to do the surgery and go to euthanization, it's really okay.

Good luck, and peace to you.

I'm so sorry. It's a tough call.

With one of our cats, we tried and tried to save him and I fully regret not just bringing him home to die in peace here with us. So when his friend got sick years later with probable cancer, we had a different approach. The particular vet (not our usual one) told us to take him to the kitty ER for this and that...we said no. We loved on him for one more week, called a traveling vet, and let him pass at home. If the surgery is expensive and likely not to improve her quality of life, then I would let her have another good day or two without the pain of surgery, and then let her go.

Again, so sorry you have to think of these things. I know it is hard.

I'm so sorry because this is so hard to deal with when you live your pet.

2 years ago, we had surgery ( not as serious as your dog) for our 13 yr old Cocker Spaniel. He did well after surgery in June and then in Dec something went wrong with his spinal cord and he couldnt get up. It happened when we had an ice storm. We laid in the floor with him all night, kept him as comfortable as possible. We couldn't make it out to the ER animal hospital.

We got out on Mon the 7th and our vet confirmed our fears, he said most younger dogs don't survive the surgery. It was sad? Difficult , and heartbreaking but I saw in his eyes that he was ready.

I took comfort that he had a wonderful spoiled rotten life at our house. He was well loved and he loved us back.

I'm sorry you are going through this,

I just saw your question. I understand exactly what you're going through, because a similar thing happened to my dog. He had cancer as well, though his was cancer of the spine.

I found out on Tuesday what his diagnosis was. He was so bad by Friday, that I took him to the emergency vet and had him put down. It was so hard.

I could not let him go through anymore suffering. It was the right thing to do. I won't go into more detail here about my dog, but I will tell you that you have more to worry about than just the tumor bursting. So much other stuff can happen before that. The cancer was the overall reason, but it was other issues that put my dog in such a terrible state that his decline was so fast.

Give her a bath, blow dry her hair, take pictures of you and the family loving her. Say goodbye. Don't take the kids to the vet. Have a family member come be with them while you and your husband take her.

Remember that this is for HER. And it's okay to think of "All doggies go to heaven".

It is such a hard decision. My brother's dog was 15. They had to let him go a few months ago. He had tumors on his legs and little ones on his head. He also possibly would not have survived a surgery. I think you have to decide if she could comfortably survive the surgery or would it just make her miserable and her life harder, extending or creating any suffering.

My heart goes out to you on so many levels. I can relate to what you are going through and it's such a sad process.

You are taking into consideration all of the important factors. Here's my suggestion. Sit down with the vet and look him/her in the eyes and say, "If this were your pet, what would you do?"

Quality of life is so important and if your dog's recovery is difficult, it's going to be tough on him/her. You don't want that. As dogs get older (like humans), their recovery is slower, their pain is challenging, they sleep more, etc. Quality of life is SO essential.

Take your significant other and sit down and talk about it. You are going to feel emotional--that is so normal. But, talk about what you both want for your dog. It's our job to make decisions for our pets, even when they are tough decisions.

Do the surgery and hope for the best. It will give you time to prepare for her aging and passing away. If the doc finds it all over I think she just stay asleep like the vet says. Let your family know it's a serious surgery and she might not make it. That way they'll have time to prepare emotionally.

GSD family member of 11+ years here...

If you can afford the surgery comfortably, then I would probably go forward with it. Treat her with all the love and care and treats you would (that you can due to surgery) as if she is going to be put down, and then hope for the best.
For me, it takes it out of my hands. I know, pretty cowardly on my part, but that's how I would likely view it. If it has spread, or there are complications during surgery, she will pass under anesthesia. If it hasn't, and they can remove the tumor, she may have another good year or who knows how much longer. (You really didn't mention her overall condition outside of the tumor... our girl is getting more arthritic every week, but she still eats normally and has no continence issues.)
If you decline the surgery, then you are deciding to put her down, without exploring the possibility of keeping her for a while longer without the risk of a rupturing tumor hanging over you all.

So, it almost has to be a cost thing. Can you afford the surgery? Can you discuss potentialities with the vet regarding different issues that might arise during surgery and how the expense may grow with complications and what measures you would like taken in those eventualities?
Some dogs live to be 14 and 15 years old. Some have so many health problems that they don't get to be 12. If you can afford the surgery option without compromising your financial stability, I'd do it, with instructions for the vet on what sort of "heroic" measures you want or don't want. The end game is you want more time with your baby IF you can have it without her suffering. You don't want her to suffer. Your vet can help guide you. If they are recommending the surgery, then listen. If they are heavily pushing the angle that she is old and not likely to survive the surgery, then listen to them. I assume you trust your vet.
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ETA
With the added information, I would agree that letting her go is probably best. She had other health issues and recovery would be very difficult with those issues added to the recovery itself in even the best case scenario.

I'm so sorry. It always hurts to lose those we love.