Parenting/Discipline Books

Discipline without Distress and 1 2 3 Magic are great. They contradict each other a bit, the author of DWD does not approve of time outs for example, but they are great. Also, the Discipline Book by Dr. Sears is wonderful.

Parent for your child, not for yourself is the best advice I can give you. :)

My son was perfect at age 2... THREE is much harder in our house. I think you can get into trouble by expecting the worst... expect the best and you will get positive results!

I found Parenting with Love and Logic to be a bit over a 2 year old's head, by the way. :)

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I just want to say that not all toddlers are difficult. I think there is the potential for a self-fulfilling prophecy. Toddlers act the way they act and some people see that as terrible, and certainly some toddlers are more difficult than others, but if you gear yourself up for a battle, you'll find yourself in one, so leave the option open that you will have "terrific twos". My 4-year-old has always been her complicated wonderful self, with good and bad moments, no matter what age. I come from Israel where there is no such thing as "terrible twos", kids are just kids at any age. So just be open to the idea that the twos may not be so bad, sometimes they aren't. I don't think my daugher had her first "tantrum" until she was 4. So you never know.

Good luck!

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Parenting with Love and Logic (Ages 2-6) Books on CD are perfect! I learned so much from those cd's. I eventually boght the whole series! They give Clever insight to discipline, tell you what to say, and let you know when to kust walk a way.......... i think you can borrow them from the library, but I would reccommend you buy them You won't be sorry!

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Parenting with Love and Logic gives great tips on specific situations.

On Becoming Babywise, (more books are Todderlwise, Childwise, Preteenwise) focuses on schedules at first and then what you will want to be working on (when you start feeding cereal, make sure they know to keep hands away). It emphasizes prevention instead of teaching after bad habits are first learned.

Good luck!

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I love "Parenting with love and logic" It is exactly what it says- loving and logical. Children receive direct consequences for what they do- not punishments. Read it- it's awesome. I don't recommend Gary Ezzo's books. See www.ezzo.info about why people shouldn't follow them.

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The Happiest Toddler on the Block, from ages 1-4, I began reading it when my dd turned one and many of his suggestions have worked very well. He tells you how to understand their language. He explains the fast food talk rule, to talk no more than 3 word sentences, or else it is like them listening to Charlie Brown's teacher (you know the wha, wha, wha..) that is how they hear us. I've recommended it to all my friends and they like the ease of his writing, easy to understand and is funny. If you have a daughter. Mother Daugther Wisdom by Christine Northrup, MD, it will carry you through the age of 21. I also have a list of parenting books on my family health column. You can click below, it is on the right hand side.

Good Luck, Happy Mom's Day.
J. W. MPH
Chicago Examiner Family Health Expert
http://www.examiner.com/x-7158-Chicago-Family-Health-Exam...

I've read a bunch of books, but Parenting with love and logic is my favorite. Good luck!

1-2-3 Magic and Sal Severe's How to Behave So Your Preschooler Will Too.

I LOVE 1,2,3 Magic... I have been using it with my two year old and he really responds to it. I rarely have to give him a time out or consequence because usually by the time I count to two... he stops the unwanted behavior. My pediatrician actually recommended it and so did the social worker where I teach.... GREAT book! Easy to read, easy to follow, and works wonders!

I'd recommend "Great Kids" by Stanley Greenspan if you are looking for something a little more scientifically based. I haven't read this, but Greenspan is an expert in child development (most of his books are on special needs kids and child development issues), so his parenting book should be interesting. I would also second the recommendation for Alfie Kohn's Unconditional Parenting, which I think would fit well with your goals. His background is more in education, but he also integrates research into his parenting philosophy, and emphasizes empathy, critical thinking, and working with children. Finally, for practical ideas, try Lawrence Cohen's Playful Parenting.

I find anything by T. Berry Brazelton to be helpful as well as

Emotional Life of the Toddler by Alicia F. Lieberman

and one that is written for new parents, but extends into the toddler years,

Dear Parent: Caring for Infants With Respect (2nd Edition) by Magda Gerber and Joan Weaver

Good luck!

We just rented 1, 2, 3 Magic from the library and our only regret was not renting it out sooner. My kids (now 4.5 and 2.5) seemed to fight every single day. Now that we have implemented 1,2,3 magic, I now enjoy life much better.

It teaches you, the parent how to disciple and the hardest part about doing it, is not to show emotion.

Smart love by martha heineman pieper and william pieper, Unconditional parenting by alfie cohen and Positive Discipline by jane nielsen are all based on intrapsychic humanism or "loving regulation" parenting and are based on a large body of clinical research on early childhood development. When you look at the different approaches, one of the best questions is what you want long term regarding your relationship with your child. Is it compliance or a close and loving relationship. Traditional discipline: timeouts, punishment and rewards may sometimes get quicker results but often at a large long term cost. Timeouts were originally designed as a way for training pigeons "timeout from positive reinforcement" was the original clinical term. They are never appropriate for an under 3 but even after that they are not the most effective long term strategy and they lemphasize seperation rather than closeness.
My little one is now 2 with all the joys of that - meltdowns, tantrums etc. But from the research i have read it is better to destress child rather than imposing discipline. that being said, there is lots of modeling good behavior. Good luck.

Hi J.!

I am a former social worker and now mom of a 5 yr old and 2 yr old and love the Thomas Phelan book -123 Magic. It is an easy read and the concept is simple which is great for both mom and dad to be on the same page quickly. Children grasp the concepts well and clearly if done correctly. I find a lot of similarities to Super Nanny on tv.

Hope that helps!

H. Graber
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Dr. Sears! He's great!

Smart Discipline by Dr. Larry Koenig

James Dobson...A Strong Willed Child.

He discusses parenting the way parenting has been done for centuries...the way my parents did it, they way their parents did it, and the way their parents before them....Don't know of any psycho's or traumatized individuals in my family, but I can tell you that I come from a long line of productive, law-abiding, honest, hard-working, intelligent, loving people.

Worked for them, it works for me.

We love 1-2-3 Magic! It's easy to read, understand, gives tons of scenarios and how to react to each one. It's thorough and effective. Good luck!