Pacifier Weaning - Monrovia,CA

My sister has a 3 year old and when he was younger she wanted to get rid of his paci. So, starting when he was about 18 months she taught him that the paci "sleeps in his bed" so he learned he could only have it when he was in bed (naps, night time). Then, when was about 2 1/2 he brought her a pacificer that had a tear in it saying it was broken, so they had a little "good bye paci" ceremony after which she ran all over the house and got rid of all the other ones. He whined a little at bed time for a couple of nights and then forgot all about it. Now they're expecting baby 2 and when she got some pacifiers as a gift her older son said "Paci's are for babies!" So cute. I know some people who purposely snip the end of the paci's so they're "broken" if you're really anxious to be rid of it. Good luck!

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Hi, P.. I fully understand your predicament. I had two children -- one addicted to his pacifier; the other one didn't care for hers after the first couple of months. Go figure! With my son, he was about 18 months when I started talking to him about how he was now a big boy, and pacifiers were for babies (there were several other babies in the neighborhood, and I kept pointing out how THEY used a pacifier). I told him the pacifier knew that he was getting to be a big boy, and IT was going to go away one of these days. After about a week talking and talking about it, I took it away while he napped. When he woke up from nap, the pacifier was nowhere to be found! We looked around and called for it, but IT had gone! We celebrated (make a BIG deal) that he was now officially A Big Boy, and not a baby. He looked a little puzzled at first, but then he joined in the celebration, and didn't talk about it or asked about it again. The bonus of my scheme is that I had not been "the bad guy," since it wasn't I who had taken it away -- THE PACIFIER had gone away, on its own. Only you will know when your daughter is ready to transition off her binky (maybe 14 months is a little too soon?), but when she is, I recommend this plan. Good luck!!

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P., I hated it when my son used his "plug" as we called it to. His pediatritian told me that while it is a false security, sucking his thumb or blanket attachment would be far worse as they get older. You can take the binky away at times, you cant take your little angels fingers off. Eventually Hunter weaned himself off of it and only used it for 15 minutes or so at bed time, He would just let it fall out of his mouth and he would sleep fine through the night. When he turned 3 we moved, and i told him that we must have left it at the old house. He asked me to buy another and I told him he was a big boy and we didnt need that anymore now did we? A few months later he found one in his toy box, he came to me with it in his hand looking like an addict needing a fix, and i told him ou dont need that silly thing, you are such a big boy now! Hunter agreed and threw it out on his own. When his little sister was born he told her stories about when she got to be a big girl, she would no longer need the binky anymore, adn mommy and daddy will be so proud cause she is soooo big...My sister weened her daughter and she decided she simply couldnt sleep without her sippy cup. So it turned from one compfort to another. Is it good, or even at all attractive to see a 3 year old in a cart at walmart with a binky hanging out of there mouth ? NO! but if while at home it helps you rest, and baby get a few decent hours of shut eye what is the harm really? The Dr. Also told me that the damage if there is any is done very early on so yours, and my little angels will probably need braces some day anyway, much like a huge percent of the rest of the nations kids... Good luck to you! J.

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I have 2 year twins and we went on a plane trip after they turned 2. After we landed home and got off the plane, I told them I left the pacifiers on the plane and now they are gone on the plane. It took about one week of crying for them but then they were fine. Now whenever they see a plane in the sky they say their pacifiers are on them.

I've also heard of tying it to a balloon and letting the child let it go in the sky.

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Both of mine used a pacifier (Fi) til they were almost 3. You do what you can to literaly pacify them at times (especially at night), so don't beat yourself up because she's still using it at 14 months. When we were ready to really get rid of it, we called the "Fi Fairy", like the tooth fairy, but this one takes away pacifiers when your daughter is ready to be a big girl and give it up. Your "Bimpy Fairy" will take the pacifier from under her pillow and leave her with a present of some sort, whatever she'll be super excited about that will make her forget the bimpy.
Good luck! And remember, she's not going to take the bimpy to college with her, so she will give it up sooner or later anyway. :)

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My daughter was 4 1/2 when she finally weaned from her "poppy". She was only allowed to have it in the house (out of my own embarassment), by that age. However, she made the decision herself. I think 14 months is AWFULLY young - since a child that age can not rationalize why you are taking it away and just sees the rejection. I'd suggest that you wait, at least, until she is old enough to understand why it's being done ("the new babies need your pacifiers", "the pacifier fairy needs more pacifiers for the little babies", etc.) Replacing the pacifiers with a special "treat" is also helpful, as they get older. BTW, my daughter is now 9. She was just tested for the gifted program in her school, is a gymnast, speaks clearly, and shows no signs of any trauma from having her "poppy" removed. She does still love to talk about them and, every once in a while, will take one out and "suck" on it for a second or two. It represents a great deal of love and acceptance to her. J.

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Hi, P.. My daughter was also addicted to her pacifier. She had to have it day and night. At one point, we must have had ten pacifiers around the house.

Here's how we finally got her to put it down herself. We cut a little hole in all her pacifiers! When she'd want one, she'd get one but it had a hole in it so it wasn't the same. Eventually, we'd cut the holes bigger and bigger until she didn't want them at all. After a short time, she didn't even ask for them anymore and the binky saga was over. And the best part, we weren't the bad guys because it was her decision to quit using them.
It sure worked for us. I hope you have success with it too. Good luck.

God Bless,

--L.--

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Snip a little peice of the rubber off each week, or every couple of days, until its gone. Tell her this is the one and only binky, throw all the others away and don't buy a new one no matter what. Also, tell her, as she is getting to be a big girl her binky gets smaller, just like her clothing and other things. Hope it works for you.

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I cut the tips of my daughters binky when she was over a year. Sure she was sad for a day or two and kept telling me her binky was broken, but it worked. I had to cut ALL the binkies too or else I probably would have caved in.

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There's really nothing you can do to keep it from ruining your day- but if you want to save your sleep at night it's not a terrible thing to let her use it only when she sleeps, but unless you plan on letting her sleep with it until she's 3 you're eventually going to have a rough night. I'm sure lots of people will tell you tricks to try, and I would say try all of them until you find something that works for you. My only advice for you is to stay strong not feel guilty when she cries for it- at that age crying is still their most effective means of communication, and she's simply telling you she's upset (everyone gets upset, right)- not that she hates you or that she's hurt or that you're a bad mommy. But make sure that whatever you choose to do you explain it to her as simply as you can (ie you're a big girl so you only get your paci at sleep times, or whatever makes sense to you). Don't just take it away without telling her why.

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Hello,
My oldest had his "binky" until he was THREE!!! He would only sleep if he had it...therefore I could only sleep if I gave it to him. It was a good tradeoff to get some sleep...I was pregnant with our second then. Once it was getting closer to my due date, we wanted to get rid of the binky before the baby came. We talked alot about it with him and he decided we would mail all of his binkies to "baby land" so they could be ready for our new baby. He decorated the envelope, put all his binkies in and said goodbye as we put them in the mailbox. He was sad a couple of nights...but talking about where his binkies went and the "fun" trip to the post office was enough to distract him. He is now 13, very well adjusted, no dental problems, and very handsome (ok~that has nothing to do with the binky...I'm just partial!!!). Your little one will not get married with a pacifier in her mouth, she'll be ready soon to give it up. GOOD LUCK!!!

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my son was equally addicted, and we feared the task of getting him off it. we prepared him in advance that when he turned two it was time "to give the pacifiers to the babies." we talked about it a lot, and when the time came, he helped us gather them all up, and was surprisingly okay with it! he only asked for it a couple more times, where we reminded him that we gave them to the babies, and that was that! good luck with however you choose to do it!

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I don't think you have to be in a rush to wean from the pacifier. My two boys were three years old and their language development is perfect-they are now 8 and 10. They also had no affect on their teeth. On their third birthday, we gave the pacifier to the pacifier fairy to give to other little children that needed it. Then she left a little gift in return-kindof like the tooth fairy. It worked great. My youngest didn't want to turn three because he knew he had to give it up but the gift made him forget. Especially since you had issues with your first, I wouldn't worry about rushing. Do it when your child is ready. Those binky's can be a lifesavor-good luck!

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The way we we got our son off of his "jaja" is we cut a little off the the tip, he still would use it but eventlly said it was broken and he lost interest.

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Hey P. - A friend of mine let her son go until 2 yrs with his binky and finally decided to end it with a ceremony. She had him gather all the binkies and told him "Today we're going to say bye-bye to all of the binkies. No more binkies after today." Then she took out the trash can and had him put them all in the trash and say goodbye. The had him watch as they took the trash bag out to the garbage and threw them out for good. Later than day she said he had one GIANT melt-down when he wanted it. For about 45 solid mins, but then, after that... he never wanted one again. Of course, every child is different, but it was a good approach for them.

I have a thumb sucker - but she's only 8 months. She's already doing it much less and less as she gets older, so hopefully (fingers crossed) she'll wean herself!

Good luck!
A.

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I see that you have gotten quite a bit of advice already, but i thought i would still send some your way....I work with children ages 3 months to 2 yrs. They transition over to the toddler room at 2 and paci's are not allowed there. When the children get close to their 2nd birthday usually 2-3 months before we say good bye to their pacifiers. We let them know in advance that we will be saying good bye, a few days is fine. So we might start letting them know on monday and say good bye wednesday or thursday. The day of as we help them down for their nap we let them know, "today is your last day with your pacifier. When you wake up we will say good bye to your paci's" When they wake up we gather all the pacifiers, together, the child will put them in the bag themselves and we then take them up to their parent mail box to go home. The next day we remind them that we said good bye and they will nap with no pacifier. Our kids usually do well, but of course it will vary from child to child. Yes, she may cry, but if you give in each time she cries she will only cry harder the next time. Offer other choices for chewing (teething toys, frozen cloth). We do this when saying good bye to their bottles aswell. Just make sure that when you do say good bye you don't bring them back because that may confuse your child. Always make sure you include your child in changes to come, it can be scary to a child not knowing why. I hope this is helpful for you and good luck!

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I wouldn't stress about it at this point, we let our son have his "bink" until just before his 2nd birthday and boy did that help with weaning from nursing and getting through the rough 18mo-24mo period of lots of tantrums and the most painful teeth coming in. Just before he turned two we put all his binks on the counter and said, "Now that you're getting so big we're going to say goodbye to the binks!" He loved the trash truck, so we swept them all into the trash while he watched and then tied up the bag and put it out front and said that the trash man needed to take them away for other babies. He cried like we had killed his best friend, but by bed time he was fine and only cried for about ten minutes each night for two or three nights. It was way less traumatic than I expected because he was really attached to his binks. I think if you do it too young, you'll be stuck without a soothing device through the molar teething and early toddlerhood - as long as she's making attempts at talking/babbling, and it isn't obviously affecting her teeth, I would just let it go for at least another six months! It sounds like you have your hands full with the seisures in your older daughter, I wouldn't make life any harder than it has to be right now - have you ever seen a 16 year old still using a pacifier? Just try not to stress and make your girls grow faster than they need to :)
K.

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RELAX!!! She's still young and needs the pacifier. That is her security. You don't want her to turn to food, biting, hitting, or anything else. My oldest son used the pacifier until I was able to reason with him about getting crooked teeth like the Sesame Street monsters. Your daughter is under two. Just keep her busy, but there's no reason why she can't use it at home when she needs it. Or anywhere for that matter.

My oldest was a paci baby. I stopped letting her suck on it during the day before she was one and then I went cold turkey at 17 months. She screamed for a week and then realized that she was no longer getting her paci. She began biting her finger and toenails (yes toenails) until she was two but then stopped. I was happy I did it that way.

Good Luck!

This is what accidently happened with my 18 month old son. HIs binky fell into the toilet and it got him so disgusted he didn't want it. It did not occur to him that we could buy another. It was rough for a week but he got over it. Also,the dentist told him it wasn't good. Then he started identifying a pacifier with being a baby and he was a big boy.

She isn't ready to let go of her comfort "thing". She is still so little. Don't rush her. It will just stress you both out and make her feel insecure. She will give it up when she is ready and they really really help during teething.

You're talking about the 14 month old giving up the pacifier? Please don't take this the wrong way, but.... have a heart. Come on she only gets to be a baby for so long why does she have to grow up so fast?

I remember when my oldest was 14 months old and I was anxious for her to wean from the pacifier, be potty trained, and sleep in a big girl bed. That was the most miserable year of my life and hers.

maybe you'll think i'm weird, but i think it might be a little early to take a pacifier. She's only 14 months old!
I think that by 2 or 2 1/2 one should start thinking about it. BUT, if you're dead set on getting rid of it, cut a little hole in the tip and then give it back to her. Tell her it's broken. She'll be upset but at least she can hold it when she sleeps at night. Pretty soon, she won't want it anymore...at least that's what happened with my 2 year old when we decided he should be done with his.
hope this helps!

Hi P.,

I've seen so many people asking for help weaning their children from a pacifier and I honestly don't see what the big deal is. My kids had thier binkies until they started kindergarten and it didn't hurt them any. Their teeth are fine. There's been no psycogilcal damage for overuse of pacifiers. Sometimes I get some weird looks but it doesn't bother me. Wy don't you just let her keep it if it makes her happy? It will certainly make your life easier as well.

My daughter is almost 14 months and I still let her use her pacifier. She basically uses it for going to sleep. I think your daughter is still too young to be weaning her off of it. I've seen kids much older still using theirs.