Ok for 7 Yr Old Boy to Buy His Crush a Present?

I think it's perfectly fine and adorable. I had necklace a little boy gave me in the first grade up until I moved out on my own and then it got lost, but it had great sentimental value.

Also, if today is gift exchange anyway, what's the harm?

How sweet your little man is!

Forget your so called friend's unsolicited advice. What age does she live in???

I think its sweet. I remember being in elementary school and getting a small gift from a boy. My daughter remembers this as well because she got a few gifts here and there as well.

It is sweet and innocent plus you should be proud of your son. He used his $$ and he feels good about giving!!

I've got nothing against crushes.
Everybody gets them at one time or another.
I just don't think the 'I like you = I'll show it by buying/giving you something' is a good thing to encourage.
Liking someone shouldn't be a transaction.
Guys tend to do the gift giving - seldom is it the other way around.
And then some girls get the idea 'I want a boyfriend so he can give me stuff'.
It's complicated enough in middle school and high school.
It certainly doesn't need to start up in elementary school.

I would have him give it to her after class away from the other kids. I think it is totally appropriate and adorable. It has been 10yrs but my daughter still remembers the necklace a little boy gave her in 1st grade (and still has it). Don't let your friend put a damper on it

If they have gift buddies, then he should have a gift for his buddy and not for this girl. No one else is getting 2 gifts, and the purpose of gift buddies is so everyone gets exactly one gift.

If your son wants to give her something outside of school, that MIGHT be appropriate. BUT it depends on a lot of things. Friends don't buy friendship with gifts or money, as others have said. It's early to encourage too much boy/girl stuff by calling it a crush. Since the families are friends, I think I would have called the girl's parents and said, "Here's where we're at. What are your thoughts, and let's agree on an approach." The girl should not feel she has to buy a gift for your son because he bought one for her, and she might feel awkward about getting something anyway, let alone about not having something to give him.

However, the horse is out of the barn on that one because you already took him to Claire's to buy something. So you either have to give the gift or tell him you've thought about it more and changed your mind. If you can instruct him on gestures of friendship that DO NOT have a reciprocating gesture, and let him know that it's nice to express friendship in a whole variety of ways, great. But you need to tell him that sometimes people get uncomfortable receiving a gift when they are NOT reciprocating. He also needs to learn the manners involved in giving a gift, and in receiving one. Start teaching manners/etiquette now.

Part of the push-back on this is that girls are taught from a young age that boys give gifts and expect something in return, and also that there are courtship rituals. Women are vilified for accepting gifts, dinner, theater tickets and then not "putting out" for the guy. Guys think they can buy a woman's affection or sexual favors. When little kids pick up on these things, it makes their parents nervous. So while this is not what your son intended, it may be a reaction you need to anticipate.

The other problem is that you may make the others feel that there is a precedent being established - now the kids are on each other's gift exchange list. This might be more than the other family wants to get into. You have the added problem that you have a relationship with her brother (but he's not getting a gift), and his father is your husband's boss.

I guess I'd either just have him give her the gift, or discuss it with the parents. But I absolutely would not allow him to take it to the gift exchange - that is SO unfair to all the other kids. Please don't do that.

I agree with finding a moment when there aren't a lot of other kids around, just use a little discretion.

Personally I am not the kind of mom to encourage the 'crush' sort of thinking, but if this is completely his idea and he's driving the train on this... well, either she will be grateful that he thought of her, or he learns a lesson in life. Neither of those is a bad thing.

I am on the fence about this. My daughter had friends that are boys and that's all it seems to be, although there could very well be a crush involved. I don't encourage it, although another mom confronted them both and then they began to be mean to each other out of embarrassment.

She had a crush on our states hockey player who was about 25 years older than she is, a couple of years ago. She handed his dad a valentines card a couple of years ago. I am sure she still has the crush, but she has forgotten about it for the most part.

While I think it is cute, I think she could get embarrassed, however, it is not the end of the world.

My bottom line thoughts are that they are too small to control their emotions. When they become embarrassed, they become mean out of not knowing how to deal with things. On that note, perhaps he should give the necklace to her at a different time other than school.

I think as long as you know the girl it's fine. He is just giving a gift and you should encourage his thoughtfulness.

When my daughter was in Kindergarten, a boy had a crush on her.
I also know the Mom.
My daughter knew.
It was no big deal to her.
I mean, there is NO "obligation" upon my daughter nor him, to do anything ab out it.
My daughter did not reciprocate his feelings or his actions or anything.
But she was just a normal kid who just was a decent classmate.
No biggie.
The boy lived. There was NO reciprocation of feelings.
No biggie.
They are still friends.
But they don't even really remember that happened in Kindergarten and it is just a vague memory now.
And they are both 11 years old now.

Crushes, do NOT have to be reciprocated.
As a Mom of a boy and girl, one day they will learn, through life, what that is. And per age.

The gift your son gives his 'crush'... does not, and should not, be given to her in front of everyone.
Hopefully the recipient/the parent of the girl, is not bothered, by it.

I think it all depends on their relationship. Do they play together on the sidelines at soccer? Do your families ever get together? If that is the case than I think it would be okay.

If they do not, then I think it might be uncomfortable for the little girl. Last year there was a boy in my daughter's class that had a crush on a friend of my daughter. It made the girl and her mother VERY uncomfortable, BUT that could be because he did something..I can't remember for the life of me what it was..I don't think it was kissing her..hugging/touching??? Anywho... it was a very uncomfortable situation for the little girl.

Now there is a little boy that went to preschool with my daughter (they're now in 2nd grade) whom we have somehow exchanged birthday presents with over the years. I'm not sure how it started and why it has continued, but it is more of the families being friends and it is more a gift from our family to him and his family to her.

I think that is the sweetest thing ever. It's absolutely a nice thing to do.

No time like the present to teach your little guy to treat women well and with respect. So many guys are shy about asking girls out, etc. I realize he's only 7 but why be afraid of girls ever?

Good for him for using his own chore money. Sounds like you're doing a great job.

It's not inappropriate.

At first I misread your post, thinking that the mom told you no.

I actually think that you should call the mom and talk about it with her. You can laugh about it on the phone to "keep it light".

I was mortified when my friend in third grade wrote me a love letter. I could not look at him for a week. I don't remember my reaction in its entirety, but I'm sure it was not very mature or sensitive. He reacted to my reaction by making certain i never thought he liked me again. It put a damper in our friendship that lasted well into junior high. I'm going to go with - bad idea.
but then again, gift giving could be nebulous, where as "i love you" in crayon leaves no doubt about ones feelings.