Nursing for Years to Come

I know you say you want to nurse for 3-4 yrs, but try to change your thinking to say "until he is ready to quit." It could be 4yrs, but he could be done by 18 mos. You don't want to be stuck with a feeling that YOU are not done! This happened to a friend, she was ready to nurse til 5 and her son was done by 18 mos. Just throwing that out there. My son just weaned at 4.5yrs and having the attitude that it's available as long as he needs it was critical.

From early on mine was a furious nurser. Just wanted it all the time. He seems to need human touch for comfort and now we still snuggle a lot, he likes to be held.

Just know your son. At a certain point (12-18 mos, when they're walking and talking), you don't offer but also don't refuse. Let them ask for it and when they do, let them have it! When it is available, they get to decide when they need it and when they don't need it anymore and weaning is so natural. And yes, it does happen!

It can get rough in there too! Reach out for support, read books, talk to people you know who did extended nursing! We are out there. ;)

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I nursed my son until he was 3.5. I would say that he stopped his night-time feedings around 2.5. However, I really feel it could have been earlier if I had stuck with it. He nursed all day long until at least 2, then he went to 3-5 times a day until he was weaned.

I stopped nursing him outside of the house around age 2, he seemed to understand this just fine. I lived in another area and it made people really uncomfortable to see me nursing a toddler.

Weaning at this age was really easy. One day I started telling him that nursing is for tiny babies and now he's a big boy. It only took a couple of days and he didn't ask anymore. I also didn't have any real engorgment because he was only nursing a couple of times a day at this point.

Breast milk is a supply and demand thing, so as long as you keep nursing several times a day your milk should keep coming.

Good luck, extended breastfeeding is wonderful!

P.S. Don't listen to the other anti-extending breast-feeding advice. We're one of the only cultures in the world that would consider weaning at 12 months. I creaps me out to think that people replace breast-milk for cow's milk as soon as they can. My child was NEVER a baby cow and did not need the nutrition to grow like one. Cow's milk is for cows, breast milk is for humans! The average age around the world is 4, making it common to nurse until 6-7 in some places. Both my son and I greatly benifited from the snuggles, love, attention and nutrition that I gave him from my breast. I am pregnant with my second child and I plan on breastfeeding for 3-4 years as well (even if I get pregnant for a third time and tandem nurse). I think what you're doing is wonderful. If you ever need any support or or someone to talk to feel free to email me.

Geeesh, I keep reading other people's responses and have more and more to say! Children that are abandoned in cribs, left to cry it out, and bottle fed are the ones that CLING to their mothers! My son is one of the most out-going, self confident children I know. He talks to everyone, everywhere we go. He thinks that breast-feeding is the best way to feed a baby. He has NEVER clung to my leg. He happily goes with other people for the whole day if nessesary. The advice that was given to you is massively uninformed!

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There is nothing wrong with extended breastfeeding and despite ignorant assumptions by many people in our society, your children will grow up to be independent, socially healthy children with good self-esteems if they are raised to be that way. Breastfeeding just like baby wearing is greatly misunderstood. Most cultures average 4 years old before weaning. As your child gets older, he will naturally wean from frequent nursings to occassional. My daughter at 18 months old was only nursing at night before bed and recently (25 months old) she has decided to nurse when she needs to be close to me only on some days and she likes to nurse right before bed and first thing in the morning. The rest of the time, she prefers her independence, she can drink out of a regular glass, has no issues with her teeth (probably genetic since my husband and I both have good teeth and I help her brush her teeth a few times a day), is fully potty trained and so forth.

I have many friends that do extended breastfeeding and even tandem nurse with their other children. As your child gets older and starts eating food, he will nurse less often, eventually it will drop down to a point where it does not affect your hormones and you should be able to get pregnant again, everyone is different in this area. Pregnancy does change your milk and hormones and some children stop nursing part way through the pregnancy. Some will pick it up again when the new baby arrives and some simply self wean and decide they no longer want/need it.

Many parents chose to nightwean for better sleep. It usually takes a few days to a week and is easiest when he is old enough to understand that the milk is going to sleep and that he can have more milk in the morning. They cry at first because it's not what they want and they are used to nursing all night, but once they get used to the idea, they accept it pretty easily. Dr. Sears has some great suggestions for nightweaning. I did that when my daughter turned 18 months and had dropped her nursing habits considerably on her own. The only time I allow it to occur all night is on the rare occassions she is sick or the one time she was injured.

The upside is the health benefits they receive from continued nursing. In 2-1/2 years, my daughter has only been sick a handful of times and has been extremely healthy and active.

She is not clingy, loves to be independent and helpful. She can read dozens of words, speaks very clearly with a vocabulary of over 600 words. She does not suck on objects, use a pacifier, never took a bottle and prefers to use utensils and glasses like an adult and is frustrated that she cannot write her name or other words or draw like an artist. These are all traits detractors would say does not have because she is still breastfed, but I wanted to show you that many children grow up to be exceptional because of who they are not because they were or were not breastfed. Most children that have been breastfed beyond 3 years are very well adjusted and I have seen more children that were formula fed or breastfed only a few months with oral fixations, weird social behaviors and disfunctions that raise concerns. Children and parents are going to be who they are inspite of certain ways they are raised, although many factors do play a role in our formation, breastfeeding will not pervert or delay their development and many research results show superior health and brain development as well as great self-esteems because their needs were met rather than ignored. Follow your gut and do what is best for you and your family. I guarantee there are more families out there than will admit that they co-sleep, bedshare, breastfeed extensively or tandem nurse and so forth. A great resource is Mothering Magazine and their forums on www.mothering.com, there you will find hundreds of thousands of moms that will provide you with support and factual information.

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First, Congratulations! It can be hard sometimes to go against the cultural tide, and I see some people who have written to you still cling to the idea that extended breastfeeding is harmful. Not so! My experience with my two - I nursed my son till he stopped at 2-1/2, and in retrospect I think that he may have stopped because he could tell I wasn't really enjoying it that much anymore, but who knows. My daughter nursed till she was 4-1/2, and we would have gone on longer but my husband didn't like it, so I gave in and we had a fun weaning/growing up party, which was fine (we were only nursing probably once a day at bedtime by then). They are both now happy independent, interdependent, well-adjusted adults who have children of their own, who are breastfed. My daughter nursed her daughter till she was 2-1/2 and had planned on nursing through her second pregnancy and then tandem nursing, but that didn't work well for her so she weaned her during the pregnancy. Her second child is now almost a year, and I imagine she'll probably nurse him until he stops on his own. My daughter-in-law is nursing her 19-month-old, also with no plans to wean. I slept with my children till they were about 4, and my children sleep with their children. I think cosleeping is equally important. A book that was helpful to me way back then and is still good is Mothering Your Nursing Toddler. Another one I liked is How Weaning Happens (La Leche League has both of these, as well as other kinds of support). So-called "extended" breastfeeding has many many benefits, the nutrition is really good for children, and the comfort and intimacy is wonderful for helping them to grow up feeling secure and safe in the world, and I believe it also helps them to develop good healthy intimate relationships later in life. Babies and young children will gradually nurse less and less as they grow older, sleep longer stretches, and eat more foods, but nursing is still very important and can help ease the challenges of living and growing. And no, it's not ever really predictable, because there will be times they will want to nurse more, other times less. Just let him be your guide. There is only one thing I would caution you about, and that is that sometimes women (I know, because I did this some) will offer the breast right away as "comfort" when the child really needs to be listened to while he/she expresses some feelings - this can happen when the mother is uncomfortable with hearing the feelings and just wants the child to be quiet. So in this case the mother would be nursing to meet her needs rather than the child's. It can be a fine line to tell what is best in this kind of situation, but my conclusion is that when it doubt it's better to err on the side of nurturing, and even in this case I wouldn't refuse to nurse, I just wouldn't offer it. Breastfeeding is a wonderful special intimate connection, I encourage you to enjoy it for years to come! You are truly helping to make the world a better place by raising a child who feels safe and secure and happy!

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Good for you for wanting to nurse for so long! It is great to hear of other mothers doing this. I nursed both of my children until they were around 3, and my daughter, who just turned 3, is still in the weaning process. I think most children really just are nursing for comfort and closeness at this point, but it was so hard for me to let go of that. It is just something so special that no one else can do for them but you. My first husband was not supportive of it, and insisted I wean my son when he was almost 3, so I don't know how long I would have nursed him if not for that. But my daughter's father is much more supportive, if not a little jealous of "the boob" as he puts it lol. I pretty much had to start weaning her about at the same age my son was, because she was interrupting my sleep too much, even though I slept with her, she would wake me up several times a night wanting to nurse. She is now 3 by a month and a half, and down to not nursing at night and only to get her to do things she wont normally let me do like brush her hair and trim her nails. But my milk supply is down to almost nothing, so she only nurses for a few minutes then tells me "it's empty". Every once in a while if she gets hurt or wants something to drink in the middle of the night and I am just too sleepy to get up and get it for her, I will let her nurse a little bit. But the night waking is dependent on how much I get her to eat for dinner, or if I can get her to eat a snack before bed time. I don't really want to get her into the habit of snacking before going to sleep, but I really need the sleep. It has been 3 years since I was able to consistently sleep through the night and I am so ready for that again. :) So most nights I just try to get her to eat a good dinner, and that makes her sleep much longer and better.

Most of my family wasn't supportive of my extended nursing of my children either, so stick to your guns. They just don't understand all the benefits of it and society as a whole seems to frown on it, which doesn't make any sense to me at all, but I walk my own path and don't let what others think bother me. My children are both extremely healthy and happy and well adjusted, and that is what is important. I think you are doing a fantastic job! And no, not many things are ever predictable lol.

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Hi there,

Just wanted to make a quick comment. Reading your other responses, some suggested that the "recommended" amount of time to nurse is one year. I actually just read that the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends at least two. Just throwing it out there. Good Luck.

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I too had planned to nurse for an extended period of time with both of my children. I had to wean my daughter early (my second) for medical reasons, but my son nursed until 14 months. By 1 year it was for comfort only as he was eating plenty of solids and drinking cow's milk with meals. At that point it was evening only and usually only once. He started getting squirmy when I tried to initiate it he wouldn't sit still (14 months). So I told him if he wanted to I would but he needed to ask me (he would come over and lift up my shirt) and he never asked again. Good luck on your adventure.

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Way to go with nursing! Did you know that worldwide the average age of weaning is 4 years of age? My daughter and I are up to 15 months, and still nursing. Her night feeds have dropped to one, and she nurses 2-3x during the day. Sometimes more during stressful times like teething/growth spurts/developmental milestones. It's normal for them to taper off of nursing as they rely more on solids, and many kids who are extended nursing drop to 2-4 nursing sessions per day. Rather than being a primary source of nutrition, think of it more as a supplement.

As for night nursing, it is possible to night wean and not totally wean.

Your milk will not dry up if your son is still nursing. It's all supply and demand. Most kids will self-wean at about age 2 or 2 1/2.

A great online resource is kellymom.com. (http://www.kellymom.com) Here is their link on extended nursing: http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/index.html. Also the forum/discussion boards are a fantastic resource for information and support. Many moms there are nursing well into year 4, as well as tandem nursing an older child and a baby.

You're doing a fantastic job with your son! Way to go making it 10 months nursing and many wishes for a happy continued nursing relationship.

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I am still nursing my almost 3 year old. I really think it is a mutual thing and as long as you don't get too annoyed and your son still wants it, it just happens. My daughter never really cut down too much on her own, I night weaned her when I got pregnant, in about 2 months we'll see what happens when her little sister is born.

Nursing through the second year was great because they really seem to get sick a lot and being able to give them that immunity boost from breastmilk really made me feel better. The WHO recommends nursing for the first 2 years but natural self weaning is somewhere between 3-7 years and I think it just depends on your relationship. If the night feedings are too much for you, cutting out part of it might help you. I used Dr. Jay Gordons plan for night weaning.

It's on this page about halfway down:
http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp

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Hi M., I think that nursing is such a personal thing between you and your child. I don't agree at all with all of the responses that are saying it's "bad" or "gross". It's totally between you and your child.

I nursed my son until he was two and finally decided to wean since he was down to pre-nap and pre-bed feedings and it was only for comfort and I was ready to stop. I certainly wouldn't judge anyone's decision to go longer or shorter. I think we should all be supportive of these hard decisions as moms - no need to be a nipple nazi or afraid of nipples!

I never planned on being an "extended" nurser I just let it come naturally. My original goal was one year (it was really hard for me in the beginning) and then we just kept going because we were both comfortable with it. I did night-wean prior to 24 months (I can't remember when as it's all a blur really!) but I had to because I really needed the sleep and his pediatrician assured me he did not need it for nutrition. It wasn't too tough to do - my husband would just go to him in the night to soothe him for a week (we don't do CIO) and then he was fine with it and then I could go soothe him w/out nursing after that.

Anyway, long story short - I think it's a good idea to not set up a specific goal and just go with your child and how you feel. It's great if you want to nurse that long but your child might not want to (a lot of kids I know weaned themselves prior to 24 months and some keep on going). You also might change your mind and that's okay.

Once he was near two I did nurse at home mostly just because he was down to a couple a day and it was usually before sleep so we were home anyway. I just didn't feel comfortable nursing in public as he looks a lot older than he is and because of the attitude of some of your other responders! Anyway, I support you in whatever decisions you make and I bet a lot of other moms will too!

And to your predictability question - everyone's supply is different and so are kiddos so you just never know what will happen down the road!

Oh and in response to the clinginess stuff - all kids are different. Some cling regardless and some are fiercely independent whether they're bottle or breast fed. We can't control everything!

Good luck!

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I agree with the people who said nursing that long is not a good thing. The kids that I have seen that have been nursed past 2 years old are not socially adjusted as they are always clinging to their moms and trying to lift their moms shirt in public to get some and that is not accepted in our society, it can even be borderline sexually wrong according to some social service agencys. If you feel you need to nurse something after 2 years old, you should have another baby, don't try to keep the maturing one ---a baby.

I have a Psychology degree and I have observed that the kids that are weaned before 2 are socially adjusted and like the one lady said moving on to potty training and preschool. Anything that you get a kid hooked on is giving them a dependence on it, no matter what it is, nursing, sleeping with you, etc, it is hard to reverse that out of their mind. A chid of 2 can drink from a sippy cup, he doesn't need to be sucking on something. I have one patient that was breast fed until 3 and he still has an oral fixation at 45 years old, he does not suck on things but he always has to have a finger in his mouth off and on and chews on it also he did suc his thumb off and on until 12 when he thought noone was looking.

Be careful what you choose, it can have long term affects. Nursing in general is great, I nursed 5 kids and they all pretty much weaned themselves by age 2. Which I was happy about as I had a life too!

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I nursed for 3 years - that was supplementing what my child was eating naturally. There is no problem with that. I think in the old days people nursed until age 3 - 5.

M.,

Breastfeeding the child til he's 3 or 4 isn't a smart move. Guideline is til 1 yr. old after that you can start him on cows milk. I have breastfed my kids til they were a yr.old and that was it.

At the age of 3 or 4 he'll be able to start preschool depending on the area you live in. Also around the age of 2 you should be able to start toilet training.

Good Luck

Hi M.,

I guess I'm Janey-come-lately to answering your question since you've already posted a response, but I just wanted to say bless you and, no, nothing is ever predictable.

I nursed my first until she was almost 3, at which point she was only nursing once in the evening or during melt-downs. Weaning happened because she bit her tongue pretty badly and it hurt to nurse. Then she realized she didn't need it for bedtime anymore. My second is 2 and is still nursing.

I went in to nursing knowing that I would nurse for at least a year and that after that I would just feel it out. On this issue (and many others) you and your son are your best resource. He'll let you know what he wants and if it's in line with what you want, you'll do it. If not, you'll make a compromise for both of you. Nursing dwindles not just because solid food takes over, but because they are more independent and entertained by other things. But for night time, sick time and upset time nursing can last a long time--longer than most people are willing to continue nursing.

So my advice is to use your instincts and give yourself plenty of permission to revise (wean at 2.5? wean at 5?) as time goes on. By the way, a few weeks after my first child "weaned" she had a complete meltdown and wanted to nurse. I decided that it wouldn't hurt and I still had milk! Those mammary glands are hardy in most women.

Good luck. Enjoy your little bundle!

Hi there!

I didn't have the opportunity to nurse my babies after two months since they both were horribly lactose intolerant. However my friend nursed her son till he weened, and perhaps the choise to long-term nurse should be something you and him decide.

With her son it became a comfort thing he'd do, but he outgrew it as he was around other kids. Your son might as well, but if not then plug ahead!

Many kids who are bottle fed stop night feedings around a year old (some earlier!). If you haven't started supplementing a bit of rice cereal in try that in the evenings to see how it affects his nightly routine. You can pump some of your milk as the liquid part to make the cereal.

He will, eventually, need more because he will be getting bigger, and unless you want to nurse a lot you'll need to add in other foods for him. I know other countries nurse due to lack of food, but it is a full-time job from what I understand.

I have read that continueing the breastfeed after 4 can cause allergy problems though - other than that I don't know why ppl get so upset over this kind of choice.

My daughter is nearly 19 months and still breastfeeds 6-8x daily. Sometimes more, but 6-8 is average. I am trying to encourage her to drop her overnight feedings so one of the things I've done is feed her on one side at a time during the night. During the day, it's both sides every feeding. She's slender and I've never been sure if she wakes for the nutrition or comfort. There's no reason to wean until your child is ready and he may be ready in a week or in 4 years. There's no way to know what any particular babe will do. Just let him lead the way and he'll breastfeed until he's ready to be done. He should be having some solid foods in addition to breastmilk each day because as he grows, he does need the diverse nutrition that a variety of foods offer. My daughter started on cow milk at 16 months and will usually drink it when we give it to her, but we don't give her cow milk instead of breastmilk, it's in addition. Please don't be discouraged by people telling you not to provide the best nutrition possible for your son. You're doing what is best for him and that's the most important thing! I do occasionally get dirty or funny looks from people when I breastfeed in public, but I know I'm doing what is best for my daughter so it's really okay wtih me. My daughter is tall and verbal so people regularly think she's at least 2, but frankly, if she's still breastfeeding at 2, I'll be thrilled! I'm pregnant so I know any feeding may be her last and I want her to get every drop I can provide for her. She's healthy, happy, social, and well adjusted. Good luck to you!!

M. j,
just wanted to add that not only do you not need to wean at one year (that isn't even recommended by the AAP) but if you should choose to you don't even need to wean at all. i second the recommendation for the mothering.com discussion boards; in particular there is a section under breastfeeding for mother's looking for support who are following the child's lead in the gradual weaning process (child-led weaning). like learning to walk or talk it occurs on it's own - it's not for everybody (nothing is, right?) but it can be extremely helpful to know about so that your nursing duo can discover where it is on the spectrum the two of you will fall. there is fabulous information about "extended" breastfeeding on katherine dettwyler's site (she's a hero of mine...)(http://www.kathydettwyler.org/dettwyler.html) also see: http://www.kellymom.com/
my daughter weaned of her own volition at five and a half years old. i had milk the entire time save about eight weeks in the middle of my pregnancy with my son. the assumption that milk has no nutritional value after a certain amount of time is laughable (what does it just turn to water?).
as the mother of a 18 month old who hasn't pooped in a diaper since JULY i have a new parenting motto: don't knock it till you try it. (when mama's post asking for support or help and it's something that i am not interested in pursuing with my family i generally don't respond. novel idea, huh?) if you're interested in my emotional musings about breastfeeding to term (or child-led weaning) they are here:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=880...=
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=100...=
the experience was indescribable. i am a new mama for it.
best to you and your dear little nursling,
n.
my daughter would like to add, "i nursed until i was 5. i liked it. and i really think that you should say i had milk past two years old. that is just not true that the milk goes away."

I nursed my first until she was about 14 mo old, as I got pregnant with #2 child, and the demand on the body of feeding and creating at the same time is pretty high. #2 nursed until he was almost 2 yr, but he was sensitive to dairy, so it made imperative that I was his source. He was eating food by the time he was 6 mo old, such as rice cereal and new strained foods were introduced. #3 nursed also for about 2 yrs. Because I worked and occasionally traveled out of town, I pumped and frozen my milk for my husband to use or for the grandparents when we were out of town. Pump went with me to keep me comfortable. But as your son increases his intake of solid foods and other liquids, he won't be nursing as much. Night time nursing should wane considerably about 12 mo. He should be sleeping thru the night. You might want to think about how he's going to interact with other kids at pre-school if he's still breastfed at 3-4 yrs of age. My Mom nursed all of us, my friends did not nurse their kids, I was retro, but then their Mom's did nurse them. It's what you're brought up with and the support you get from your family that makes it all work. But 3-4 yrs is pushing the envelope, just my opinion, for so many reasons. If you're planning on having more children this may cause some problems. Have a talk with your pediatrician for your child's needs and then with your ob-gyn for your health. Best of luck!

so glad you're doing this, I've decided the same. My little man is 17 mos old now & still nurses a few times a night. But past 6 months they need to start eatting alittle food because your iron stores can be gone by that point. Great things htat have kept my milk up are: coconut milk, avocados, good fats, lots of water, frequent feeding while looking at him & thinking about how much i love him, kept up with prenatals & vitamin D throughout nursing...hope this helps... & more power to you!!

I love that you are going to nurse for a long time! My experience, as painfully true as it was for me because I also wanted to nurse my daughter to sleep at night for years to come, is that she would not sleep or stop nursing through the night until I weaned her from nursing completely. I finally weaned her at a year and a half. She still wakes at night and comes and sleeps in our bed, but before that while I was still nursing her, she couldn't sleep in our bed without nursing. There was too much of a correlation for her. Now I love it because she still gets to sleep with us...and we sleep instead of nursing every 2-3 hours. Because up until 1.5 years, she still nursed that frequently through the night. My pedetrician told me the same thing but I tried and tried and I just couldn't get her to not nurse throughout the night. It's like anything else with parenting, you have to do what feels right to you and when you are ready to make a change, you will. I was ready to sleep through the night even though I wanted to nurse, too. My girlfriends also had this same experience.

I nursed my first daughter for 5 years and still nurse my second 4 year old daughter. She only nurses before bed and when getting up so it is more of a comfort. We are Mexican and so we have seen the differences between the poor and predominantly breast fed babies in the villages and the kids who are bottle fed in daycares in the cities. The poorer kids are healthier by far!! They are also much more bonded and have nice teeth where "brown rot" is endemic in the city kids who grow up on formula, processed junk foods, coca cola, and fast food. Neither of my daughters has ever had a cavity. Both are ideal weight, muscular, bright, and rarely ill. They have shiny dark hair, bright eyes, smooth skin without dry patches, exzema, and most importantly of all, healthy attitudes towards learning and activity. I let the kids wean themselves. Of course, I am not overscheduled and we homeschool. THe children are my job. I am a 45 year old woman who still has no problem producing adequate milk and it is not even an inconvenience for me. I think it is all a question of lifestyle and famiy choices. This is our choice for a healthy, happy family.

H.

Hello

This is my first time on this chat group and I saw your message. I've had a rough week and it's nice to feel like I may be able to help someone else out with my journies as a mother. I hope my experience helps you some.

I am the mother of a ten year old and a 2 1/2 year old. I am still nursing my youngest and my oldest I nursed until just before four years (which I am sure you know is quite controversal with some people). Mostly as they get older (into toddler age) the nursing becomes about attachment and comfort. Usually we nursed to bed, first thing in the morning and when upset or unsettled for whatever reason. There were also some difficult emotional things going on in our lives at the time and the nursing I believe was my saving grace.

From my experience your little one will let you know when they are ready to move into eating more solids foods. Depending on your childs temperment, you may have to help encourage a change in eating habits if you want there to be a change. My son nursed seldom at night, my daughter will eat every hour at the all night diner if I let her. You have to make a decision that is right for you, your family situation, and your child. There is no right or wrong path to choose.

As for the content of breastmilk it is said that it changes to meet your childs needs until about two years of age. Then they still get nutrients but after two the childs needs out weight what you can give them by nursing alone. Of course this probably isn't an issue since most two year olds at that point have been eating regular meals for some time. They still get benefits and the American Pediatric Association actually (as conservative as it is in comparison to the rest of the world) states that nursing until at least the age of two is most benefical to your child.

Oh ya, it is important to realize too that your milk supply will change as your child grows. I felt like I had less milk and my breasts ceased to get engorged but my kids both had plenty of milk. It can be deceiving. As long as your little one isn't complaining, they are probably still getting what they need.

I hope this helps and I'm happy to share more. We are trying for baby number three and I am coming up with my own nursing questions regarding the whole tandem nursing experience and nursing while pregnant.

P.

Hello M.!
I am nursing my 13 month old with no end in sight. I had no idea I would nurse so long but my son loves it. Most of my friends have had their children wean themselves but not my son:)
I just had a check up with the Dr yesterday and she is fine with nursing as long as we would like but, the night feedings will have to be stopped by at least 15 months. She said it is really bad for his teeth and she can already see some spots on his teeth. I have to help him brush more often but I am going to phase out night feedings over the next two months. I also love to nurse and see no problem with feeding as long as you both like as long as he is well ajusted with others. Good luck!

I think it's great that you are planning to nurse for that long. We had the same plans. I did want to tell my story so that you can understand something that might happen (but may not either...when I was a baby I would have nursed forever if my mom hadn't cut me off near 2 years old.) I suffered through 5 bouts of mastitis (one REALLY bad with an 8 cm abscess.) Most people told me I should just give up, but my daughter had so many health problems I wanted to give her the best chance possible. By 1 year old, her health problems subsided and she was really starting to thrive. I pumped using a hospital grade pump at work and at home breastfed, she never preferred the bottle over me, but dealt with it at daycare. I loved the bond and it was so easy to feed her at night if she woke up. Breastfeeding kind of got interesting at 13-14 months she was so busy that she tried to breastfeed standing up, but we still would cuddle up most of the time to breastfeed and she would run her hands along the contours of my face. It did slow down though, she wasn't needing "boo" anytime but morning and night and it was mostly a comfort, she was getting most of her nutrition from other sources. But the day she turned 16 months old, she gave up breastfeeding. I tried for a month to get her to continue thinking it was just a phase. I cried and cried, I wanted my baby to still want to breastfeed. But she was done. It was an easy dry up, everyone complained at how much it hurt, but by the time she gave up I had so little left that it didn't hurt. She's 21 months old now, I still get phantom let down feelings and I still miss the bond. But I do love being able to wear a normal bra again. Just wanted to share this with you so you can have one mommy's experience.

I did not read all the responses, but it appeared to be a lot of back and forth about when to ween. I say that is up to you and your child. Children can be happy and healthy raised on breast milk, or formula.

So on to your question about night feeding. My doctor said that night feeding is not necessary for health after the first 2 weeks of life. Children keep doing it for comfort to fall asleep, not out of hunger. When we find other ways to comfort then the night feedings will let up. I used to let my boys fuss for 5 minutes before I would go in. Most nights I never had to get out of bed. If after 5 minutes they were still awake I would go comfort then by rubbing their tummie/back and talking or singing softly without taking them out of the crib or feeding them. My boys have been sleeping through the night since they were 2 months old.

I also agree with not getting set on a length, let your son guide you in that decision.

best of luck

My 29 month old went down to one nursing a day (before bed) but has picked up again now that I am tandem nursing him with my newborn. Every child is unique in their habits, but if you let them nurse when they want and eat when they're hungry, they will get the nutrition the need.

La Leche League's website has lots of useful information and resources at www.llli.org, and my fav breastfeeding books are "The Baby Book" by William Sears (this contains most of the important information from ALL of his books!), "The Nursing Mother's Companion" by Kathleen Huggins, and "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" by La Leche League International.

Also, if you attend local La Leche League meetings you'll discover the hundreds of amazing benefits of nursing like higher IQ, proper jaw and palate development, psychological benefits, increased bone density, and reduced risk of SIDS, cancer, heart disease, autoimmune disorders, gastrointestinal disorders, obesity, juvenile diabetes, anemia, cavities, allergies, asthma, eczema, and much, much more. And the antiobiotic properties which protect against illness actually *increase* with age. (There is also a list somewhere of 100 uses for breastmilk like curing eye and ear infections.) When parents ask Dr. Sears how long they should breastfeed, his answer is, "How healthy do you want your child to be?"

And finally, there was a recent special on 20/20 called "Extreme Breastfeeding" which you can watch through this link: http://abcnews.go.com/search?searchtext=extreme%20breastf....

Good for you for wanting only the best for your child, and what a lucky kid you have. :-)

P.S. My son now wakes during the night to nurse. The phases seem to come and go and change, and his once a day nursing phase seemed to last only about half a year (and then the baby came).

I nursed my oldest for a little over two years. When he started predominantly eating other foods, we only nursed in the evenings before he went to bed and first thing in the morning. I didn't have any problem with my milk supply at all until I got pregnant again.

With my two other kids: One weaned himself at about seven months and the other weaned himself at about fifteen months old.

So far, my oldest has the best immune system. He shrugs off every virus and bug very easily. (He is also perfectly well socialized. VERY VERY independent - involved in karate and little league, etc. so there were absolutely zero negative side effects from nursing for that long.) My son who weaned himself the earliest has the weakest immune system and catches everything. The third has an average immune system.

(Genetics could play a part in this, too. My husband has an amazing immune system and I have a lousy one - and we were nursed for approximately the same period of time. My oldest definitely takes after his dad!)

Dear M.,

congrats on your decision! I wanted to add one more story to this thread...
My daughter is 15 months old now and I plan to breastfeed her at least through her second year. The feedings have decreased, now mostly restricted to mornings and evenings, even when I am not working, she is just too busy being a toddler during the day.

Just this last week my resolution to keep breastfeeding was reinforced and rewarded when my poor baby came down with a terrible stomach flu and was unable to keep down anything but my milk. It kept her hydrated and nourished when she refused to touch any solid food.

Enjoy your breastfeeding time!

Breast milk does provide important nutrients until about a year old. This is generally when the baby can chew well enough and can eat enough to get most nutrient through food. After a year, it is just a cuddle and a drink. By 2, 3, and 4 years old, most nursing moms have nothing or near nothing left and are just cuddling and suckling without any nourishment or drink.