Not Always Nice to Younger Sibling

I truly believe that you are seeing the effects of jealousy. She doesn't know how to respond to the way she feels. She can not really verbalize it. You have obviously betrayed her in your 1 on 1 relationship by bringing in these other 2 things and she feels abandoned. Very difficult for anyone to handle so how can a 2 year old. You need mommy and me time with just her regularly. Don't talk about those others during this time. Do something that makes her feel special and touches on that 1 on 1 relationship feeling. Tell her how important she is to you and how much you need her. Mommy needs lots of help and can't do it without her. Maybe she needs to feel like your buddy some.
Good Luck

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At the age of 2 disciplining should come into play.1 min in the corner for each year.your daughter is two so let her know when she does something that is unexceptable she will be placed facing the corner for two min.Explain to her when her time is up why she was put in the corner and let her know if she continues it will happen again.Make sure you come down to her eye level when speaking to her.Be consistent in disciplining this way, so she'll understand whats not going to be acceptable.If she refuses to stay in the corner which will happen from time to time its your responsibility to place her over and over until she stays.If you don't enforce this she'll see your not serious.Its worked for me for my son who is now 8.He thinks before he acts on his bad behavior. Good -Luck.

Hi D.,

As a mom and Parent Coach, boy does this sound familiar!

All siblings have some jealousy issues. Your 2 1/2 year old daughter is young but can learn that you must protect the safety of your other daughter and your nephew. Try a gentle verbal correction or model the appropriate behavior while saying, "gentle!". If that does not work, she may need a time out. Whatever you do, remember to draw a firm yet loving limit and be consistant. She may test you for awhile, but will respect that limit when she sees you will not yield. Be sure to praise how well she is doing every time she listens the first time or does the right thing.

The suggestion to spend time with your daughter alone is a great one. This puts more money in the "love bank" that helps her know she is still very important to you. When watching the babies, you might also try some easy activities such as reading a book together while the babies play / hang out nearby.

Good luck!!
Janet B
Parent Coach

Explain, explain, and explain. Then, punish or praise, punish/praise, etc.

I would suggest having her "help" with the babies. Ask her to get a diaper for the baby or sing him/her a song and then praise her enthusiastically and give her a hug or a high five and tell her what she did right. This will give her confidence and positively reinforce good behavior. I would then show her and tell her what you want from her. Gently touch the baby's head and say "be nice" or "be soft" and then give her a chance to do it correctly and then praise her for it. Make sure she's getting enough attention and love she may feel a little out-of-the-loop. She's still a baby, too. While the babies are napping or playing quietly read her a story or play with just her. I hope this helps.

On another note I have to say I admire you for being willing to babysit your nephew, but you really need to be putting YOUR children and your sanity first. If it's causing a lot of trouble I'd reconsider you decision. That's a lot to handle! Good luck!

J., Mommy of four (ages 2,5,8,11)