No Gifts (?) - Horsham,PA

I think this is a wonderful idea! Your son is too young to keep a tally of how many gifts he received or who brought them. A few new things will be just as exciting to him as having a pile of gifts that just overwhelm your space and his senses. Also, kids and parents have soooo many parties to go to these days. A friend of mine just went to six children's birthday parties in two weekends. That's a lot of gift giving! And your plan teaches wonderful life lessons! I don't think for one minute that it would deprive him of anything!
I really like it when people have a theme to gift giving. It helps me with the decision-making! Your book theme last year was fantastic. Maybe you could carry that forward and this year ask for books for a local library, children's hospital, day care or maybe a organization that promotes reading and giving books to children in need? (I think Oprah has something like this set up.) Maybe ask the guests to bring a particular clothing item, i.e., hats for the winter, children's sneakers, etc.
What a wonderful thing you are doing! Good luck!

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Hi T.,
Why not ask everyone to give money? You can take a little and get him something and put the rest in a savings c.d. or buy savings bonds. Call it a "college fund" party! Every little bit helps!
Blessings,
A.

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*In lieu of gifts please make a donation to one of your favorite charities. ***** agrees that the best gift of all is sharing time with his friends and family!
We’ve attached some worthwhile charities on the next page.

Find a notable charity at:

http://www.charitynavigator.org/

Hi I think that is a wonderful idea. We did this for my son's 4th birthday as well. I enclosed a page with his invitation with some charities that I am fond of and then gave them the website to charitynavigator. If people question you (because some people did question me), just ask that they respect your decision. I let them know that my son understood he would still be getting some gifts from mommy, daddy and pop pop, including a party with his friends which is the best gift of all. People should respect your decision.

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Ask them if they can give him money or even a savings bond. That is what my famliy does know and it works out good and they have money in the bank when they get older like to buy a car or help with college.

1 mom found this helpful

T. - For my daughter's first birthday we asked for no gifts as well. Instead, we asked that if people felt compelled to give her something, to 'help her go to college' and donate to her college fund. Of course some bought things anyway, but it was a great way to add to her savings! I am thinking that we will do this as long as we can get away with it! -until she really knows what's going on anyway :)HTH

Maybe you could ask for them to donate to a 529 College fund or a savings account you may hve set up for him. I am in the same boat as you are, with not needing a ton of toys in a small house. Clothes and shoes are also nice practical gifts that you will use. My mom always gives us a case of wipes and diapers on holidays for my son, because she knows I will use them and it helps us out. My mother-in-law bought my son the whole Harry Potter book collection for later when he is older and she also gets him the disney movies that come out so that even though he doesn't need them now I will have them when he is ready. Hope this helps with ideas.

Hello T., I attended a party that request donations to libaries only. It was great I didn't have to worry about repeating a gift and I also recieved a tax write-off. On the invitations the parents included the link to the libary so it took the guessing work out of which libary to give to. This year for my son's birthday I requested that relatives not give toys but donate to his college fund. I know that it sounds a little rude but my chid does not need another toy. He had 21 children attend his 3rd birthday party.(May) Most of the gifts I've hid away and will bring a new one out every so often when he is willing to donate a old toy. My husbands family took it well but mine were a little upset that I had made such a request. At least that was until I sent the Thank You cards. I had him paint his handprint on each one and went into detail how thankful my son is that his education will be fully funded thanks to their help.(no student loans ect...) Because it was my family they already knew the struggles that I had working 3rd shift Ft to put my sister thru medical school and to put my self through my B.A. So, although they were disappointed that they didn't give him a toy (something that would only last a season) They were pleased that they were assisting my son in something that would last a lifetime. I hope this helps. K..

Why not have him receive new gifts - more appropriate for his age and give the old toys to charity instead!?!?

Hi T.,

I absolutely understand where you are coming from. How many toys can one child play with!!!!!!! My daughter is 4, and for the last 2 years, some of my family and friends have opted to, at my request, help pay for dance classes and karate classes. Two activities she wants to do more than anything, and they help with it. It has worked out GREAT!!!! Some other people have bought her the materials you need for those activities, which has been great. While not everyone will oblige, at least you may not get ALL the toys. Good luck!!!!

Hi! I can appreciate your problem as our daughter gets spoiled by relatives at every birthday / holiday / just because with toys she has never touched.
We have asked our relatives to give savings bonds instead and then if they do insist on a gift something smaller like a book or even a gift card (of course that only works b/c she is 6 and thinks it's a credit card) but helpful b/c then she can pickout what she wants and let's face it....They outgrow everything rather quickly! Good Luck!

The desicion is ultimatly yours, but I can't help think about your son. I too live in a small house. 4 rooms with two children (3 & 5). The girl's room is filled with toys. When their birthdays come (birthdays are 5 days apart) I go through old toys that they do not play with any more and donate them. This makes room for the new ones. I could not imagine depriving them of birthday gifts. I'm not saying that you are wrong. I'm just giving you my opinion.

T.,

I have four kids, and space has always been a problem for me, also. I recently requested that friends and family get my kids DVDs or gift cards to Wal-Mart for their birthdays or other holidays. So far, it's worked out great. They really love getting new movies (I don't allow them to watch cable, and have gone 14 years without it.), and they love having the gift cards to buy what they like. That way, it's always the right size and they never have one just like it at home.

M.

My friend did the "charity" birthday party, when all the toys brought to the party were donated to needy children. This worked out great for her, since it was the first lesson in caring and giving to her 3 year old.
I have a 2 year old myself, so I realise that your boy would just have to keep some of the gifts, if they are toys. But I think if you take him to the donation site, and he will see the pictures of the kids these will go to, he will gladly part with the toys. (I do regular donations to ASPCA with my son, it he always gives out dog balls, that are hard for him to part with)

My sister-in-law has 3 kids ages 1.5, 4, 6 that love to do crafts so my SIL asks for craft supplies for them. They don't require a lot of room to store and in no time at all they are used up.

Some of our relatives like to include food with their gifts. They buy my kids their favorite fruit snacks, crackers, cereals, juices, etc. The kids are excited and it helps a little with our grocery bill.

T.,

That really is a good idea. My husband and I optded to donate to St. Jude's for our wedding instead of giving favors. We felt we were giving the gift of life to another child instead of favors no one would use. You can pick a children's place like that or the Make a Wish Foundation is also great. They give to children with all sorts of medical problems and since it is your sons birhtday this is great because it would be like giving another child a gift. All you have to do is go to one of their web pages and get the information. You could put that info on the invitations. You could also do a foundation that is close to your family. If anyone had altzimers or something like that there are all sorts of foundations. That is if you want to do it on a national scale.

The other thing is to ask your church or a local church if they have a needy family the local school district's nurse could also be a resource. I can say from experience that this can be a life saver for someone else in your own community. We use to be the ones donating until our son came down with a rare metobolic disorder and his medical expenses went through the roof and I had to quit my job to take care of him.

A local church has really taken our family under their wing during the holidays and whenever we need something. During the holidays it always helps but this time of year trying to get help is difficult so I am sure that someone would benefit from a helping hand even if it is done annonomously. We never thought we would be on this end of it but when you find yourself on the receiving end you surely look at things differently. There is a young lady that is turning 16 soon and is using her birthday party for our son's benefit. We were quite touched when she contacted us. Don't feel like you are imposing if you get the name from a church or something because they ususally check with the family first to make sure it is ok.

I hope that this helps. If you need any more ideas or have any questions please feel free to email me. We know lots of foundations and things of that nature due to our sons illness. Our email address is ____@____.com

N.

well if you havent sent the invitations yet write on them a few gift suggestions like cloths in a bigger size that he will grow into in a few months or shoes or socks stuff he really needs or ask for craft supplys like paints or crayons or even chalks. or even ask for some of his favorit snacks or diapers. stuff he actually uses and wont take up alot of space. toys are okay but they rarely get played with past a few days. so many will love the suggested gifts due to the fact they will know it will be something he can use. there will probably still be a few who shop for toys though.

For the first couple of birthdays for our children, we put on the invitation that no gifts were necessary. At that age, the children get excited just having everyone around and getting to eat cake.

For my daughter's parties, I have enclosed a little note in the invitations saying "Do not feel like you need to bring a gift!" I feel that this cuts down on people buying something just to bring it, and the people who really want to bring a gift bring one anyways, so she still gets lots of gifts. :) It lets the party focus more on seeing everybody and having fun, and then we don't have 50 million gifts to figure out what to do with.

I can relate. We have 4 kids in a tiny house and they have 4 sets of grandparents who love to spoil them. I have in the past asked them to get one gift for each child and if they want to spend anymore money to make a deposit in their college funds.

This past school year my one son went to a party and on the invetion they had that they didn't want any gifts. But Any used or new videos or games. So that they could be given to the childrens ward of a hospital. A nother thing that family and friends can do is give your child money and then you can put it into a bank account for him.

Ask for a bond. They can go to any bank and even get one for 10 dollars and in seven years in will be 20 dollars. Whatever amount of money they give in the bond in doubles in seven years. That way you can put it away and cash it in when ever he needs something or even when he gets older he can have money put away for school or even a car... That is what my mother did, and I plan on doing the same for my children!!!

Goodluck,
M.