Nighttime Potty Training Options

I don't know about the night wandering, but it might be worth checking the temperature in her room.

My ped told us that it's fairly normal for some kids to wet the bed until they are 6 or 7. I don't think the issue is "if" she needs the pulls up (which she clearly does), but how to get her to sleep deeply through the night.

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While most 4 year olds are night trained, some are not. My family has a history of night wetting until puberty, at least for my brothers. It wasn't BEHAVIORAL! They hated wetting the bed every night. It's a physical condition and a hormone thing. Get some real information people!

I agree with the other poster who questioned about temperature and naps. My daughter is hot when she sleeps and will often sleep in shorts and a tee shirt p.j. combo, or little night gown, even when it's cold at night.

Does she still nap? I had to cut out naps when my daughter turned 4. She wasn't sleeping through the night anymore and was a restless sleeper that ended up in our bed. Once her naps were gone she slept better at night (though is still cranky in the late afternoon).

My mom did away with diapers by the time my brothers were 4. They learned to strip their own beds and place the sheets and their soiled clothes in the washer each morning. She always had the mattresses covered in plastic to protect them and had lots of fresh fitted sheets in the cupboard. So, while they still wet the bed, at least they were able to be responsible for their beds.

Your daughter will eventually outgrow this. She just needs an educated and understanding mom to get through it. I can't stress getting the RIGHT ACCURATE information and not just opinions of others. Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi J.,
Except for the occasional accident at night, she should really be potty-trained at night by now. I have a 4-year-old daughter and she has an accident maybe twice a year in bed. I'd curtail all liquids an hour to an hour and a half before bedtime, make sure she goes right before she gets under the covers, etc. I'm sure you're already doing all that, though! :)

Also, we did make the investment in training underwear and used them day and night. They were wonderful! A bit of an investment at first, but sounds like you are going through so many pull-ups that the investment will be worth it. Check them out at Leaps and Bounds; they have high parent approval ratings, too. Nothing is going to be completely waterproof, but these come close to fitting the bill. They will keep the urine inside, but if your daughter takes them off, it will all dump out. I wish you the best of luck and I think you should definitely see your pediatrician about why she is going so often at night time.

http://www.leapsandbounds.com/catalog/product.jsp?product...

Once you've met with her ped. I would think about why she isn't sleeping through the night?

Is she still napping? Is she getting enough sunshine? Why isn't she dead tired and asleep through the night?
There isn't a good reason why she should be wandering the house at 4 years old.

Taking off her clothes as long as she's in her own bed probably isn't a battle that needs fighting.

Get some of those waterproof pads for cribs to lay under her. Then if she leaks it's only the pad you have to wash not the bed.
Good Luck.

My daughter is 4 also and not night-trained. She is a very sound sleeper and even during the day cannot yet hold large volumes of urine. So, NO, I would not worry about night training yet.

As for your problem with the mess, would you (or bigger issue, your daughter) consider diapers at night? My daugher is ok in a pull-up for the night, but for awhile we had to use the overnight diapers or she would soak through.
Maybe this is an awful idea, but use the diaper and duct tape it so that she can't remove it without your help? Then when she decides to change in the middle of the night you can help her get re-dressed?

Sorry about the wetting everywhere. Do you think it would do any good to put a potty seat next to her bed?

The striping and wandering sounds familiar. I resorted to locking mine in her room so she couldn't wander out to the kitchen and play w/ knives or stove.

As far as PJ's, try the footed PJ's that zip in a slightly larger size and put them on backwards and zip them up -- unless she is Miss Houdini, they well probably stay on. I've heard of parents who put duct tape around the pullups so the don't pull down -- not touching the skin.

You may want to look into why she wakes up so much in the night. I've known bedwetters who sleep thru the whole night in the same bed.

Another thing is she could be doing this on purpose for attention. This will likely get worse after your baby is born. You might want to try rewards for positive behaviors -- choose 1 at time, like first get her to stay in her room all night -- get rewards every AM she does and a bigger prize for x number of nights in a row. After she has that under control, move on to the staying dressed, finally the bed wetting.

4! You are braver than I. Good luck w/ all.

I don't know if you have tried the UnderJams or Nighttime Pull-Up, but they work for my three year old, who used to routinely go right through regular pull-ups, even the so called leak proof ones. Both UnderJams and Nighttimes show older kids (looks like 5 or 6 year olds) on the package and list high weight ranges, but they fit my 31 pound, 39 inches tall son. They also come in girl and boy styles. Good luck!

P.S. It is not a big deal that children wet the bed. It is a lot more common than is realized because people don't like to talk about feeling like they have failed at potty training or something. Mention it to your pediatrician if you are concerned, though. And try a gate at your daughter's bedroom door so that she stays in her room at least.

she is really going multiple times a night. That seems like a lot. First try to get her to stay in her bed all night long with her clothes on. Ask her why she isn't staying. she is 4 she can tell you many reasons (and fun long stories, cute). Work from there. I trained my 4 year old in the 2 phases like you. She wore a pull up at night longer than I intended and wasn't really dry in the morning. But I went and got waterproof mattress pads and just did it.we had a few accidents but she got used to it. We have been accident free in over a year. =0) I think she knows she is going in her pull up because she can and then everywhere else because she is just used to going at night. Good luck.

I have several friends who use the new cloth diapers. They have layers of absorbent fabric and even extra inserts for absorbency. They are as effective as disposables at preventing leaks and are reusable. I'm not 100% sure but I bet you could get them in a "pull up" style. They even come with really cute prints too. Perhaps you should look into it - they are a bit pricey but I bet if you bought 3 or 4 of them and did wash every morning it would be cheaper than going thru 3 pull ups a night over the course of a few months. And really she could be wetting at night for a good while. I know a lot of kids who routinely wet the bed till age 6 or 7 and a few who did till age 11 or so. It's not something they can control at night and (aside from the usual limiting fluids late in the day and going to the bathroom before bed) there's not much you or they can do to prevent it.
Good luck!
***edited to say... I just read the other responses and am a bit shocked! Please PLEASE don't listen to anyone who says that by 4 she should suck it up and be responsible for her own wetting "problem"!!!!! Children are not all the same and while for some at age 4 they can control it, it's NOT a behavioral thing if they can't. I would probably ask your pediatrician to rule out other issues but seriously this is SO normal! As for the wandering and stripping off of pj's - I have several kids who are wanderer's and I was one too. I have one that will change clothes in the night and not remember doing it. In fact I wandered as a child when I believed I was walking to the bathroom - then I would proceed to squat in a corner or wherever and pee. My parents learned to listen for my feet in the night and my dad would run to get me and guide me to the ACTUAL bathroom before I made a puddle in some corner. It's possible she is sleepwalking too - but even this isn't something that should be too worrisome. I haven't pee'd in a random corner in my sleep since I was probably 10 years old :)

Wow J.,
That's a lot to deal with! I have a potty training on-line book if you want me to send it to you. Just email me at ____@____.com
I agree with not even worrying about putting jammies on her in the first place. If she is going to take them off, then there's no sense in putting them on in the first place. If you show her that it doesn't bother you, then it just won't be an issue. Why battle with that?
Then what I would do is start waking her up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. At first you should do it a few time a night........let your husband do it. You need your sleep. Eventually, you could set some timer in her room to wake her up, she should learn to go pee by herself. Getting the peeing under control before the wondering issue, may be more important right now. Kids create all kinds of bad habits, it's up to the adults to find the right solution and not to enable them. Maybe this book might give you the tools to help your daughter.
Good luck to you, and happy holiday's to you and your family!
Email me at ____@____.com to hear from you soon!

why not expect your child to be potty trained at 4? Please check with your Ped for medical issues. I agree with the other Mom... no Pull UPs... NO water 1 hour before bed.
The way I did it, was to wake your child to take her to the bathroom when you go to bed.
She might be the type of kid who needs to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.
Is she on medication? this would prevent her from waking up at night.

good luck.

Good luck... a few things that helped us:
-waterproof cloth diapers (pullup style) Find a cloth diaper store- I got mine at BabyFrenzy- but that's close to where I live- they have an online store or you may find another store near you. They seem to be a little harder for them to take off by themselves too- so you may have to get up and help her- but that would prevent everything else from getting wet.
-no drinks about an hour before bed- we don't really have drinks after dinner... they go potty right before bed and if they are thirsty they can have a few sips of water, but every night that my hubby gives them juice (they drink more because it tastes good) they are up at night or have accidents.
-make bed changes easy- maybe even try the pads over her bedding to help save some of the sheet changes- remove other unnecessary bedding and just use smaller blankets that are easy to wash. We just used a mattress pad sheet and small blanket to make it easy until that phase passed.
-We use a moniter in their rooms still but keep them closed in so they don't wander the house- I used childlocks on their doors to keep them in (some kinds work better than others) and we just try to keep them there or return them there if they get up that way they learn that there isn't a choice at night but to be in bed

good luck- she'll outgrow it eventually :)

I have no suggests for the undressing but I might be able to help with the potty training. I did recently potty train my daughter and I used the "3 day potty training" method. It worked really well for us, in fact it only took a day and she was potty trained. In the book it does go into what to do for bed wetters. If you want to email me I can send you a copy of the ebook. The author will help you out too but you have to buy the book. My email is ____@____.com.

Sounds to me like you should hire a bouncer or security team!! My stepdaughter still sleepwalks and it's scary. All of my step kids wet their beds until they were older (7-9) and they actually had a disorder from their mom's side of the family that caused their wetting. They would be wet every morning! 4 kids 10 and under all with wet beds! It was laundry hell!! I don't remember the whole deal but it had to do with their body's inability to control the muscles. I would try the cloth pants. If you get on the web you can find all sorts of accessories for cloth diapers. I know there's a plastic pant that can go on over because I had a gal pal who did the whole cloth diaper thing (2 at the same time!!) She used to order them from Amazon. If you search night time diaper cover there are a few different ones. If only you could teach her to sleep walk to the toilet!!

Hi J.,
Cloth Training pants will definitely take the financial pressure off, I have a HUGE list of WAHM's who offer them for sale here:
http://tinyurl.com/browsing-training-pants

Some 'bits of advice', or rather 'things to consider':

- Pregnancy is a HUGE change in the family - her wetting may partly be a sign of this stress - what if you reassured her that the baby will not replace her and all those sorts of things, it is good to tell them over and aver..

- self confidence is a big factor - 'blame' the wetting on something, like having orange juice or some other food she might crave.

- Give her a 'night time potty' - only for nights perhaps, put glow in the dark stickers on it, give her a torch to make them glow (put some colour cello on it to tone down the brightness!) - If she is getting up to remove her pants, you can certainly practice getting up to do a wee!

- Make one of those charts - just a short term one, with a goal like getting some new doll or clothes for one or whatever, have her draw up a bunch of circles, set the target, add the circles each day she uses ONE LESS diaper overnight. Ease it down and CHEER at any improvement, commisserate at a wet night " Ahhh, you'll be right tonight!"

- Offer your support (may just be for a while) "I'll help you when you call at night to get to the loo / on the potty - perhaps there is something about it that scares / worries her and that is why she doesn't get up? - Night light, and a 'special' torch and glow in the dark stickers on the way to the toilet may be fun?

- Discard in your mind your schedule for getting it done before baby arrives - this is extra pressure, and doing so might actually mean it resolves sooner!

- emphasise self - confidence with her - build her up in many other ways, say she CAN do it, you will help her, if she EVER wakes at night, it is because she needs to go wees - repeat and repeat this!

- Lastly, food sensitivities can hugely contribute to wetting. Look into it at places like http://www.drrapp.com/ and http://www.fedupwithfoodadditives.info/

- Hayfever, blocked nose can also hugely contribute to wetting - causing lighter sleep and less of the hormone that concentrates wee = more wee, more waking = more wee!

Lots of ideas!
Hope one of them sparks a glimmer of an "Aha!"

- C.
http://www.parttimediaperfree.com

First- has your pediatrician ruled out anything medical? After you have established no medical problems- then you need to get some structure and consistancy-- the pull ups need to go! She is far to old for them! She needs to deal with the accidents and be motivated to change her behavior- which is my last point- could it be attention seeking behavior or acting out? Your current situation seems stressful- and to a 4 year old- this behavior gets focused attention- although negative.... You may want to discuss this with your pediatrician as well- or a mental health professional who specializes in working with parents of young children.

Gerber makes a cloth training pant and a plastic one w/some cloth to go over it for night or nap.

Hi J.,

Make sure your daughter uses the bathroom before she goes to bed to empty out as much from her bladder as she can.

One thing I noticed in your request is that your house is 60 degrees at night. That is COLD! Do YOU want to get up out of bed during the night when it's that cold?? One thing I just learned is that when it is cold like that, your bladder contracts and will hold maybe 30% less than normal. Combined with that and the fact that it is so cold in your house and only sleeps with a baby blanket, she might be too cold to get up and go potty.

Like one mom suggested, keep a potty by her bed. Try that and see if it helps at all. And yes, she is probably also doing this for attention since you are pregnant. And it is extremely hard to have patience for all this while you are pregnant, I know. Just be sure to be consistent and try to not to be too hard on her.

Good luck!

-Char