Night Time Potty Training - Sudbury,MA

Updated on January 17, 2012
K.K. asks from Sudbury, MA
11 answers

My son has been potty trained for a couple of yrs now, but still wears pullups at night. He'll be turning 5 next month. I haven't been pushing it or concerned about it, believing he will get it when the time is right. Recently, he wants to wear underpants at night, so we have been trying, but he wets the bed most every night. I would be interested in hearing other's experiences... Is it best to wait a little longer? Or is this already a little later than usual? Should I wake him at night so he can go (against my gut feeling..)? Or keep trying and he'll get it, maybe the pullups make it worse, with his not having to get up to go?
Thanks!

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So What Happened?

Thanks for all the responses. It confirms what I thought, he is a little too young and is not ready biologically, despite his wanting to. But I wasn't sure what the 'average' age was, this helps a lot. We'll definitely stop trying for a while. Thank you! (ps - I didn't ruin any mattresses, and the extra laundry wasn't such a big deal... neither were my concern! ;)

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A.P.

answers from Dothan on

5 was too young for my son to stay dry all night. I used Night Time Pull Ups - put one on every night when putting on his pajamas. On the mornings, he was dry, I praised him... on the mornings he was wet, I acted like it was no big deal. When the pull ups were dry each morning for weeks at a time, we finally switched to regular underwear at night (I think he was 6 at that time; he is now 7).

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K.A.

answers from San Diego on

Nighttime dryness is all physical development and it not something that can be learned or taught. His body needs to mature enough for the signals of the bladder and brain to work together. This can take years. It is not unusual for 8 year olds to still have nighttime accidents.
If he is still waking up wet he can not wear underwear unless you want to do lots of laundry or unless he wears them outside of his pullup/diapers which is what we do with my daughter that really wants to wear undies but is not physically ready for day or night time dryness.
Don't wake him up or limit fluids after X hour of the night or any of that. All it does it makes everyone cranky and sleep deprived. It does not help his body develop any faster.
Just tell him his body needs to grow more before he can wear underwear at night and that it's no big deal.
He'll get there.

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

My 4 yo begged and begged for underwear at night so we finally tried it. For nine nights. Four were dry, five wet. The dry nights happened because we woke him up twice at night to bathroom. He never "learned" from being wet, or us getting him up. We quit for now. We just explained to him that his body wasn't ready to stay dry all night and we would try again another time. After broken sleep for nine nights, we're all happy to be back in diapers!

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

There seems to be a variety of opinions on this. Some moms have claimed success simply putting their children in underpants. It's not clear whether the child learns to wake up and go after wetting the bed a few times, or the child learns to hold the pee till they wake in the morning. Or perhaps was on the verge of dry nights anyway. If they wake to use the bathroom, that's less optimal than sleeping through the night, but at least children will wake only during the "lighter" part of the sleep cycle, so it won't disturb sleep too much.

But when children's bodies are finally mature and coordinated enough, they will sleep through. A few toddlers start waking dry well before their second birthdays. Most kids get there somewhere between 2 and 6.

But an unfortunate number cannot stay dry at night until as late as adolescence (sometimes even later), no matter how desperately they wish otherwise. Their physiological systems simply don't cooperate, and/or they sleep too deeply to notice the urge. Or their bodies don't yet produce enough of the hormone vasopressin to reduce the production of urine during sleep.

In a few of these cases, there is a medical problem that can be addressed. But in most cases, the child simply needs time for the bladder to grow larger, or the sphincter control to lock in, or a nighttime chemical change, or part of the sleep cycle to become lighter. Nighttime wetting is considered normal until around age 6.

Here's a useful website loaded with information: http://www.med.umich.edu/yourchild/topics/enuresis.htm

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D.P.

answers from Seattle on

My friend's 6-year-old son is just starting to wake himself up and go to the bathroom alone in the middle of the night. My brother-in-law wet the bed until he was 13.

I spent weeks waking my kiddo up and sleep-walking him to the bathroom before I went to bed, and for a couple of weeks he'd sleepily sit on the potty and pee, and then he started resisting. I finally gave up. And he's not even potty-trained during the day, yet... I was just trying to save another nighttime diaper and/or a load of laundry in the morning.

Does your kiddo wake up when he's wet? Or does he sleep through, wet, until morning? If BEING in the wet pj's wakes him up in the middle of the night, try putting a pull-up *over* his underpants. He'll wake up from the wet cotton against his skin, but his pj's and bedding will stay dry.

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P.B.

answers from Spartanburg on

My son is 5 and half and still wets himself at night. He simply cannot wake himself up and I tried letting him be in undies, it just doesn't work for him yet. One night, in an hotel room, he slept through the fire alarm blaring! To wake him up at night to go pee would mean "figthing" for at least 15 minutes before he really gets to the point to walk himself to the bathroom, it's just torture for him and I refuse to do it.His grandpa from his father's side got rid of his diaper right before starting elementary school, so I am thinking this is in his genes or something. It's frustrating but I realize he really can't help it. I hope it works out for your son very soon.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

My son is 5. He is still in night time diapers for bedtime and naps.
My daughter was that way too.
Normal.
And normal per Pediatricians.

All I did, was explain... to my kids that their body... is not ready yet to be dry at night. Hence, the night time diapers. They understood. All you have to do is explain to the child. You need to explain to them.

AND get, a few waterproof bed pads. To put DIRECTLY under him when he sleeps.
I have 4 that I got from Amazon.
Easy.
The sheets do not get soiled that way.
I just rotate them as needed.

ALL of my daughter's Teachers, from Preschool to Kindergarten to 1st grade, said that this is NORMAL. It is biological development of the body/brain/myelin sheath nerve development. And kids these ages, wet the bed or have accidents. It is childhood. And they wear night time diapers.

Pull ups are useless for night time, because it does not hold much and it leaks. USE Night Time Diapers. I use Huggies. And I also, change my son 1 time a night... when the diaper is over loaded. He does not wake.

This is all about the physiological biological development... of the child's internal organs and brain connections and nerve development.
Not the age of the child.

Night time dryness, is not something that is physiologically attained, until even 7 years old, And this is normal and per our Pediatrician.
Some kids, are later than that.

Don't wake him just to pee. Then he will get lack of sleep/sleep deprivation and be fussy the next day.

My daughter, even at 7 years old, had night time accidents.
No biggie.
I just changed out the bed pad, she changed pj's and went back to bed.

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R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I agree with Katrina. Personally, I wouldn't put him in underwear until he stayed dried consistently and would explain to him he isn't ready yet. Unless you love doing extra laundry : )

You could try offering him underpants after he stays dry at night for several days in a row, say 5-7, and if he attains that give him the underwear, being ready to take them back if he starts wetting again, but I believe if he was ready he would be staying dry now that he's being wearing them.

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M.G.

answers from Philadelphia on

I would wait a little longer, especially if he is wet most nights. My son is 6 and still wets the bed most nights. Our pediatrician said this is very common, especially in boys. I just find it frustrating because he can go a week without having a wet night and then will have a week with no dry nights at all. Night time dryness has nothing to do with day time dryness.

We make our son go to the bathroom before getting jammies on, then he has to go again before he gets in bed for good for the night. I do sometimes wake him before I go to bed and make him go one more time. This helps sometimes and other times he still wets again. We may try a bedwetting alarm but I don't know how much this will help.

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K.G.

answers from Burlington on

My son asked to get out of diapers around 4 1/2. I waited until he was dry 5 nights in a row, and went for it. We had wet beds, and still do sometimes, but encourage a "big pee" before bed. If we know he might need to go again, or didn't really go well before he passed out, we might try to put him on the toilet. If you just bring the limp boy to the toilet (and seat him there before you go to bed)...it might be enough to get him to go reflexively. I wasn't sure mine was ready, and I was not in a rush to do it, but I will say that now that most nights the bed is dry...it is nice. When he wants to do it, I think it is our job to support the effort, reassure that it takes some time and practice, I would not want to discourage his efforts. If he says he doesn't want to try, I would wait...might be easier on all of you. Also helps to get some of those washable mattress pads/covers and make a bed on top of the sheets, and make it easy to strip the bed in the middle of the night (having a clean/fresh set ready to go)

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Stop making more work for your self and letting a mattress get ruined. He is not able to stay dry and may not until he is an adolescent. It is frequent in boys to wet at night much longer than girls.

Buy some pull ups and save money on extra utilities and laundry soap. Plus all the extra work that it puts you through each and every day.

I promise, if he could stay dry he would, so wearing pull ups is not going to tell him that it's okay to wet himself.

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