New Puppy/ Dog Fears

My advice would be to not get a puppy. Consider an older dog, maybe as a foster family to see how it works out. One that has manners and is used to children. By fostering, you are just keeping the dog until it can be placed permanently.

Puppies jump, chew up toys (and fingers and everything they can get ahold of) with sharp little puppy teeth, they don't understand commands (yet) and are bundles of endless energy. If she's already afraid of dogs, it could be a recipe for disaster. An older (1-2 years old) dog will be calmer and less intimidating to an already fearful child.

If your daughter is that fearful of dogs, please do not get one now. Why oh why bring a pet into the house that will cause terror in your child?

I get that everyone else wants a pet - heck, I live with a ton of dogs and cats - but it sounds like your other household members are old enough to understand the need to wait.

Please wait until your daughter is older and can better verbalize her fears and better understand your explanations.

Thanks.

I am in the camp that says wait until your youngest is at least 5 years old. At that point they are bigger and can be better expected to know how to handle and behave around a puppy. Puppies are a ton of work and need to be supervised constantly. They do jump, nip, play-bite, bark, and get into everything they can. They need to be house-trained. Generally not something I would recommend taking on while you still have toddlers in the house too - it's like having another toddler around. At least by waiting your kids will be older and more mature, and maybe by then your daughter will have gotten over her fear of dogs - a crazy jumping nipping barking puppy is not going to help her now!

I hate to be Debbie Downer, but if I were you I'd wait. I love dogs but have never been a fan of puppies. They take tons of work, they nip and have supersharp teeth, they jump and bark and are generally not very well behaved until you get them trained. I think it would be a nightmare for your daughter to experience this. Maybe an older dog would be ok, but not a puppy. Wait until she's older.

If you want to introduce a dog into the family either wait until she is older or get a grown dog with a VERY CALM temperament. Do your breed research and really know what you are getting into. We chose a rescue Greyhound for our first dog and I would never change it. They come housebroken and are very sweet and calm animals. They are extremely tolerant because they are used to being raised in a pack. Not saying it's the only breed to get - I just mean know the traits of your chosen breed. Many puppies are going to jump and nip all over your girl and in all likelyhood make her fear worse. They chew on anything including hands. They nip noses etc... Get a calm, older dog preferably with some training. Many breeders have an older dog on hand. The other advice I have is to read Cesar Milan's book before you bring the dog home. It has great advice for introducing a new dog into your home and to your kids. It will tell you how to teach the dog that the child is master too.

Beside the fear issue...do you really know what a job it is getting a puppy. Tons of trips outside to go potty. Putting up everthing that you don't want chewed up. That means the kids can never leave anything laying around. A puppy jumps and bites at your pants as you walk. They will chew on your furniture. You have to watch them every minute. While holding them...they will jump at your face and nip with sharp teeth that hurt like crazy. Do you really have time for all of this? Or you could just lock him outside to live his life alone....or leave him in a kennel...what a great life for a dog.

Please don't do this to your daughter. Puppies nip, jump, and bark. Chances are a puppy will increase her fears of dogs. If you are determined to get a dog now instead of waiting until your daughter is older, please consider rescuing an adult dog so that you will know its temperament beforehand, and with children this young, you need to find one that is very tolerant and good with children. Good luck.

Where we live, our humane society doesn't adopt out puppies to families with toddlers. You're actually taking in another baby - a four-footed one with the attention span of a gnat and *no* idea of how to behave. Both toddler and puppy can be hurt, and both can increase in fears. It's actually harder for the dog, because a parent will try to help a child out of his/her fears, but the puppy will simply be discarded.

I suggest that you call your humane society or a local dog rescue/adoption service, and ask them to help you find the best dog for your home. It may be that an older (one or two years old), calmer dog will suit you. But the experts will be able to help. I have a friend who fosters animals and has the experience to put "her" dogs in just the right homes. It's impressive to watch her.

On the other hand, you may have a pup picked out - perhaps from a breeder. In that case, talk to the breeder people. I've known toddlers whose fears were assuaged by visits to several litters of puppies.

Honestly I would wait until she's a bit older . . . my ped told me years ago that a good rule of thumb is when your youngest is 5.

JMO.

I can tell you that my two boys, ages 2 and 3 are very afraid of dogs also. They have a dog (golden), which they are not afraid of, so I don't really understand it. If we're at the park and a friendly dog comes running over, they are clinging to me for dear life. I believe it is something they'll outgrow over time, especially if this pet becomes a part of their daily life. I would be careful with the puppy however around your 2 1/2 year old, puppies can be a bit overwhelming because they like to playfully jump, chew and scratch. For this reason, I think I'd hold off until she's a bit older.

i think she will be ok because its a puppy it will be small.. just tell her its only a baby .. she'll fall in love with it eventually.. when we brought my dog home at 8 weeks old my mom was so pissed off she left the house she wanted nothing to do with him he was an absolute terror as a puppy.. but he was so cute and funny she couldnt help but love him.. even when he was chewing holes in her couch cushions she would say ur lucky ur cute.. now hes 9yrs old and that is her baby he follows her everywhere .. i can guarantee u that dog will end up being ur daughters best frend.. after all they are going to grow up together.. definatley research ur breeds before u buy though some are just better/more tolerable with small children

I can't predict what will happen, but I can tell you what happened with us.
Our son was afraid of dogs. Not severely, but the neighbor's little foo foo dog (a small wire haired terrior... less than 15 inches tall) jumped up on him and startled him, causing him to fall backwards and land on the concrete. It hurt. He was 5. He never cringed or clung to us around dogs after that, but was adamant that he didn't like dogs and that "Millie" was mean.

Our daughter, going on 3, LOVED Millie and every other animal she encountered. We decided we were going to get a dog. We did our research, and decided to find a German Shepherd pup. Got one just before daughter turned 3 and son turned 6. He was never afraid of her (she was only 10 weeks old and was very small when we got her...she was probably more scared of him when we brought her home--after the car ride alone in the crate). He was never afraid of her. She went through some puppyhood herding and nipping at their elbows (she is a herder after all)...but we worked through that and she matured and outgrew a lot of those behaviors as she learned that humans are "above" her in the pack.

He isn't afraid of dogs now. And never has been since. The kids do know to not approach a strange (unknown) dog. And to ask an owner first if they want to pet a dog. But they are not afraid. They curl up with her (she's 7 now, and big) in her bed sometimes, give her hugs, crawl under their bed with her, etc.

But that was our kid and our dog. Your story may go differently. But "fear" is one of the reasons we felt it was important to get a dog initially. Not, by any means the ONLY reason... but a contributory reason to go ahead with it. Our youngest was 3, but she is an animal lover and always has been, and is very mature for her age.