T.L. asks from Fort Worth, TX on March 31, 2007
Need Suggestions to Help Get Son to Sleep in His Crib.
My son who is almost 5 weeks old has slept in bed with me and my husband since we brought him home. At his one month check-up his doctor said now is the time to get him used to his crib. He can be sound asleep and as soon as we put him in his crib he wakes up. We will leave him there in hopes he will fall back to sleep but he doesn't. I didn't think you could spoil a newborn or that we would really know the difference but it seems that I am wrong. We have only tried it for a day and we have tried to start getting him adjusted by doing it when he naps. We have yet to even try it at nighttime. Any suggestions?
M.M. answers from Dallas on April 01, 2007
I did the same thing when my son was born. I kept saying when he's 3 months I'll be more insistant on him sleeping alone because he slept so much LONGER when he was with me. Needless to say I never broke him of the habit and he still sleeps with me. He's one. It is really hard to listen to them cry but I would recommend giving it a try...from what I've heard three days seems to be the magic number, but like I said I never made it to day 3. Good luck.
T.T. answers from Dallas on March 31, 2007
He is still VERY young, and to go from the warmth of your bed to that big open crib is a HUGE adjustment for him!!
Both my sons slept on me until 3 months (4 for my 2nd). When I decided to put them in their crib, I took it very slowly. I did not expect either one to sleep very long in the crib at first. But it really didn't take very long. I also used the bouncy seat as a transition since it cradles them more than the bed and makes them feel more secure. IMHO, they can still be fairly easily transitioned at 3-4 months before they get "spoiled" to your bed. Both my boys (now 2 & 5) are very good, independent sleepers, so apparently I didn't spoil them.
OK, I'm going to be the rebel here. If you like him in your bed for now, then keep him there until he gets a little more mature. Enjoy it, that phase doesn't last long, and you will miss it!!
P.S. Swaddling works very well for transitioning.
L. answers from Dallas on April 01, 2007
We swaddled our baby and it saved our lives as far as getting him to sleep and keeping him asleep. I know some people are completely against swaddling, so I realize it's not for everyone. Best of luck to you! Transitioning by baby from the side sleeper to the crib was one of the hardest things we had to do (probably more for me than for him). :-)
N. answers from Dallas on March 31, 2007
I suggest you get and read the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weisbluth. It was recommended to me by other Mamas on this list and I wish I had had it when my daughter was a new born (she turned 3 in Feb). It will help you understand how and why babies sleep and take you through all their stages of development. It is so important to the development and happiness of your child (and yourselves) to know and understand the value of quality sleep. It is an easy read and a book you'll want to keep referring to when he progresses to the next stage of development and his sleep habits change.
Congratulations on your new son and good luck! N.
J.H. answers from Dallas on March 31, 2007
I have to tell you now that this is not going to be easy. Take it from a mother of a TWELVE year old and an 18-month old. I swore that I would never have another child in my bed, but when my daughter was born 18months ago, I reverted back to my old ways. I totally regret that I did not take care of this sooner.
I know you hate to hear this, but they are going to have to cry. Trust me it will be easier to do this now than later. Babies need to learn how to soothe themselves back to sleep. When your baby wakes up in his crib, just fight the urge to go to him. It will be hard, but eventually he will learn to settle himself back down to sleep. (Did I mention that my 12 year old slept with me until she was 10 AFTER I became pregnant with my 18-month old). You want to teach your son to have good sleeping habits and by biting the bullet now it will be easier in the long run. My toddler has NO problem getting into her crib at the sitters and going to sleep but at home it is a totally different story. I am a teacher so I get summers and holidays off. When my daughter is home with me for a week, she fusses and has to sleep in my bed. When we return to the sitters, it takes about 2 days of her crying it out, but then she is back in her routine.
Sorry to be so long winded, but I am just so disappointed in how I have let this problem get this far and want to do what I can to help out.
A.D. answers from Dallas on April 09, 2007
I know I'm slow to respond, but I like to let you know that it is okay and really 5 weeks in my opinion is too young to really push things unless you want the schedule. My daughter was like that and she is now 4years old. We let her sleep with us until she was 3 months old before we started moving her to her crib. She do her last night nursing, I'd put her in her crib then when she woke up for the next I'd bring her to our bed and keep her there. It wasn't an issue for us, but you have to decided what you want. If it doesn't bother you then let him sleep with you. Remeber that at 3, 6 and 9 weeks, they go through growth spurts and all our schedules change. The same thing happens at 3, 6, and 9 years. Crazy isn't it? I hope this was a little helpful.
About me: I am a SAHM with a 4 year old and a 2 year old.
M.P. answers from Dallas on March 31, 2007
My daughter is 4 months old and she has slept with me since day one. If your son is used to sleeping with you, it's going to take some time to get him used to sleeping alone.
But honestly, I don't see anything wrong with your baby sleeping with you. The best part of my day is waking up and seeing my sweet baby girl's face smiling at me....
N.F. answers from Dallas on April 03, 2007
I let my daughter sleep with us for too long! Personally, I wanted her out of my bed but it was easy to have her there. We used the bassinet next to our bed and friends of mine have done the thing that attaches to your bed. Maybe try laying with him during naps until he falls asleep and then get up. Or let him sleep in a swing. Our daughter also loved to be swaddled. That really helped!
S.P. answers from Dallas on April 02, 2007
Everyone's suggestions have me scared. My son is 10 months old, still sleeps in my bed w/ me & his daddy and STILL wakes up every couple of hours -- sometimes to "snack" or just so I'll move him around or turn him over. I tell my bf that, if you include my last trimester, I haven't slept in over a year. The longest my baby sleeps is usually from about 3:30am until I wake him up at 6:30am (I wake up at 5:30am for work). Last weekend he actually slept from 9pm to almost 1am but that doesn't happen often (and I had insomnia until midnight, of course). He naps in his crib but if I put him in his crib for the night, I can't keep myself from bringing him to my bed the first time he wakes up.
I, too, hate that I've let it go on for this long. If I'd been able to tough out his crying months ago this all might just be a memory by now. At least I know I'm not completely alone. Best of luck to you (and to those with similar issues).