Need Potty Training Advice

I started potty training my son at 2. I told him he could use the potty whenever he was ready. It took until he was 3 1/2 until he understood. My pediatrician told me to just wait until he was ready (usually around 3 1/2). All of the sudden he just got it and has done great. A few accidents starting off but he's doing great now. I think it's just up the kids and when they are ready it will happen. Best of luck to you!

To be honest with you- I would start right away- by 3 he should be wanting out of those diapers-why wait the next 3 months summer is a gerat time for training- Take a trip to the store - let him pick out his favorite underwear! they love that-I chose not to do the pull ups- its just another step- Then it all just happens....my son loved to read- I kept a book in by his training potty so that he could hang out and not feel rushed-limit his night time water and allow him new underwear every now and then as a reward. I didnt like the pull ups- it was like paper training a puppy when the real objective was to get them to go outside- just antoher step- ha!
My son didn't get trained til 3 and I was lucky- the other kids that were "trained" earlier were still having accidents at nights and night time- by three if they are trained - its solid!

Have fun!
and ps- dont worrry- no one goes to kindergarten with a diaper-
you'll do fine.
D.
www.partyangelsus.com
8117 ###-###-####

Toss either cheerios or fruit loops in the toliet and have him "aim" at them. A friend of mine had a son that wore diapers for a little longer than usual. She decided to toss the diapers one day and told the child if you soil the floors, you will clean them. In one day, the child was potty trained at 3 years of age.

Good luck.

hi, K.,

potty training is different based on child's personality and readiness. so, you should still listen to your mother's intinct no matter how other people say.

it seems that your son is about the same age as mine. he just turn 3 2 months ago, and for longest time he had the same response as your son - did not want to try on potty, diaper was just fine, big boy underwear was not a motivation.

1 week before my son turned 3, i put him on big boy underwear while nobody else was home. he wet pants for 1 day (i actually only cleaned 3 times since he was old enough to hold it quite long). i just told him it's ok, cleaned it up (and asked him to help cleaning) and explained to him he had to go to potty and he wouldn't make a mess. next day, he got the idea he had to hold it until going to potty. i started asking him every hour and insisted him to go at least every 2 hour. and, that is it. i know some people don't agree with this approach, but it works for my son. i believe he was ready, so this worked.

at the beginning, he was a little confused on sitting and standing. he also got every upset when making a mess even he made it to potty. i had to ask my husband to help since daddy knows better :-). he was even off diaper at night for a while until he started swimming lesson. we decide to put diaper back during the night so it won't be too upset for everyone. he had not have accident for a long time but still working on aiming.

i hope this helps.

Hi K.,
I really don't have much advice. My son is 3 yrs and 4 mos old. He has NO desire to even try and go to the potty. He has gone pee in the potty maybe 5 times total.(have tried bribing him with Hotwheels) I'm thinking I may have to stay at home for a couple of days and let him run around naked! And srcub the carpet all day!! That sounds so fun but I really have no idea what else to do!! Just wanted to let you know you are not alone! Happy potty training!!!
J. G

When my son was 2 1/2 a lot of the kids at his sitter's house were starting to potty train so we started talking to him about it and even let him pick out some pull-ups to buy. We bought the potty and all but never forced it. We talked about it often but not every day and even let him wear the pull-ups once or twice just so he knew what they were about. One day, about 3 months after we started talking about it, out of the blue my mom was changing him and he told her he wanted to go sit on the potty and he pottied! Honestly he rarely had a potty accident after that.

Poop training went about the same way. It did come about 4 months later as he wasn't on any kind of "pooping schedule," but, again, we didn't push it and one day he came and got me and showed me where he pooped in the potty. He rarely had accidents after that!

Our method definitely wasn't a quick fix but it was very low key and low stress, which is what we needed. At the time I was working close to 50 hours a week and what little time I had with him I didn't want it to be spent in our tiny bathroom with both of us screaming out of frustration. I'm now a WAHM so if I have another child I might be a little more insistant/persistant but the above worked wonderfully for us.

Also -- our sons sound a lot alike at that age. I would say, "Don't you want to wear big boy pants like Dillon (his BFF)?" and he would reply "No. I like diapers." What do you do when they are like that -- either pull your hair out or go at their own pace.

Best of Luck in what ever method you choose.

K., good luck and I hope this helps since you are starting so late. Take away the diapers and let him pick out his BIG boy underwear, then go by walmart or Babies r us and get the rubber over pants. Right now in the diapers or pull ups he doesn't feel the wet uncompfortableness that he needs to feel. Plus, you want to start training your younger son so that you 3.5 yr old wants to be the BIG brother and be a good example. I know it sounds crazy and hard to do but it should work. Plus, after the boys eat or drink put them both on the potty chair for 5-10 mins and reward them with a "That's a great job sweetie" and if it takes a few extra minutes that's ok. Also you can read to them on the potty and it'll help them to relax. I have not started on my son yet but we will be starting in Sept after his 9 mos day.

Good luck and I hope it all works out.

Working Mother of a 6 mos old baby boy and wife of 9 yrs to a supportive husband who plans to help with the potty training.

Hi K.!
I'm reading this book "Toilet Training in Less Than a Day" by Nathan H. Azrin,PH.D and Richard M. Foxx, PH.D. It was recommended by 3 ladies at my church who have all used the methods and have had great success! Since it is written by psychologists, they did actual studies on mentally retarded adults as well as children and found that they can be taught to pull their pants down, use the potty, pull their pants up, empty the potty into the big potty and flush all by their selves. The book talks about using a doll that pee pees to show by example. The child teaches the doll how to do it, therefore learning quickly. Children learn so fast visually! They also keep the potty in the kitchen and give the child a sippy cup the whole time, so he/she always has to pee! I bought my copy at half price books. Good Luck!

When my son was almost 3, we were having work done on our house. (He's a stubborn boy and had refused having anything to do with the potty.) Well, during the work on the house being done, we ran out of diapers- literally. I couldn't get to the store to get more. I told my son, "We're out of diapers!" He looked at me, looked for diapers his size (because he has a younger sister), and then said, "I guess I'll wear underwear then.." A week later, he was trained. I bought a bag of Skittles, he got one if he peed and two if he pooped. Did the same thing with my daughter, except it took longer (whoever said training girls was easier is living in a fairyland). My daughter had more accidents than my son, but did the same "OH! We're out of diapers!" on both and for my daughter, I used Pink M&M's (Easter M&M's). Hope this helps! Good luck!!!

I am there with you! I love being a mother, but if I had to list something I hated....it would be the potty training.

I have six kids....ages 8yrs-2yrs...all one year apart. So trust me when I say, been there, done that....and still doing it.

It's frustrating because each kid is completely different. What works for one, doesn't always work for another. But one thing I found to be a constant....just stick them in underwear. Don't do pull ups, they don't work. But them in underwear and don't go back to diapers (except for nightime, because that takes a while to master). Expect messes and to do clean up, but it the is one thing I found HAS to be done during potty training. If you are afraid of big messes...try underware with those plastic pants you put on top, but sometimes those can be seen as subsitute diapers to your child.

I've only had one child potty train in three days, and it was my oldest girl. I have three boys, and three girls....and girls are SOOOOOOO much easier!

My advice, just put him in underwear and go at it. My now 3 1/2 year old would say he wanted diapers everytime I talked to him about it, but I chose a day to but him in underwear and stuck to it and now he HATES the idea of a diaper.

Much luck!

Try dropping a cheerio in the toilet for him to "aim" at. Also talk to him about making bubbles and encourage him to (when the urine his the water it creates bubbles). Try not to put certain expectations on him (like learning quickly), because all children learn at their own pace. Rushing things can sometimes make it harder on everyone involved. If it is an option, maybe daddy can show him how it works if he is still not sure. We started my son off standing, but he would just stand there like, now what? So he watched daddy go once (took alot of convincing lol) but once he seen how it works something just clicked for him and he's been going ever since. Good luck!

I guess my first question is why are you waiting so long to start the process? At 3 1-2 he is independent to so many things on his own, he may be holding on to diapers becuase it attaches himself to you? We did a reward system, a hersheys kiss if you peepee and 2 if you poop. He has not had an accident in MONTHS, now we are just trying to get through a dry night.

I just potty trained my 3 yr 1 month old son this weekend. We did underwear a few weeks ago and he still had a lot of accidents in them so he went this weekend commando. He ran around without anything on except a shirt and didn't have 1 potty accident. For awhile I was having him sit every 30 mins on the toilet but he wouldn't go and was getting frustrated from having to stop playing so often. I realized that he really only needed to go every 2 hours. If he went, then he got to flush and he got a scooby snack (fruit chews). I started on Thursday and he was trained within a day or so. Our next hurdle is pooping though. He tried on the toilet but doesn't give himself enough time. He had 1 accident with pooping in his underwear and did not like it. He said it just came out. I would just try it now for a weekend and if it doesn't work, then wait and try again next month. One of those times, it will click for him.

Hi K.,

I'm at the tail end of potty training my twin 3 yr olds and boy it can be tough. How we did it, and from what I understand, everyone's experience is unique.

1) I purchased underwear with their favorite characters on it, such as Mickey Mouse, Tiger, and Cars, so they would get excited about wearing "big boy" underware.

2) Just like you, I started talking to them about it and letting them know all the great things, such as go with Daddy to play golf and other "big boy activities" they could do once they used the potty.

3) Finally, after that didn't inspire them to wake up and say, "Mommie, I want to go potty"...:) We took a weekend and took them every 20 minutes. For my two boys, this didn't work any better than 1 and 2 much to our disappointment.

4) Finally, we combined "big boy rewards" with tracking their schedule <for 2 days> and then started taking them to potty according to the schedule we tracked, and it worked!

Now, we have 1 that is totally potty trained and the other is coming along quickly.

Good luck to you! K.

Hello K.,

figure out when is his "natural" schedule (as much as you can. specially for bowel movements. if you figure that he has a bowel movement around 9am then 8:55a it's time to go on the potty. if you do rewards, do like a sticker chart. we did hotwheel cars for my son... and he took forever! (of course he ended up with what it seems to me like 100 cars!) stickers is the way to go! =) yes, I know, he took us for a ride. good luck and patience! ~C.~

My daughter had to be potty trained by the time she entered preschool last fall. She had just turned three when school started, so we started the potty training process at 2 1/2 or a little earlier. We did not go straight to underwear. We took it slow and let her get accustomed to it. She wore diapers and used the toilet when she wanted to up until a couple of months before school started. That's when we did the full on potty training - no diapers, etc. It worked for us, but I know every child is different.

Here's what we did:

Put a basic potty chair in the master bathroom so she could "go" when Mommy went.

Taped a reward chart on the mirrored closet door next to the potty so she could put one sticker when she urinated and two when she pooped. Once she filled up the chart, we gave her a "prize" - a bath toy, coloring book, crayons, etc.

Once she was ready, we moved the removable potty seat and placed it on the toilet, and the put the base of the potty seat on the floor so she could get onto the toilet.

She had two accidents at school and two at night on her way to the potty, but that was nearly a year ago. She almost immediately went all night without diapers and I've been amazed that she wakes up and goes without any problem.

I think the key is to make your child feel like he's in control. He picks out the sticker and he puts it wherever he wants on the chart (our "chart" was just a blank sheet of paper and the prize would be whenever there were X number of stickers on the sheet). The prize thing died out quickly (wasn't important to my daughter), but the stickers lasted quite a while. We stopped the chart and she'll wear the sticker or put it on a page from her coloring book.

I also used colored handsoap to have fun washing hands after using the potty.

Good luck!
S.

Nothing is going to be quick if he isn't ready to learn. I don't think an arbitrary deadline is the way to go. I waited until my son was ready (just before he turned 3) and it only took the week of Spring break to completely train him (pooping too). You can encourage him ( I made a sticker chart and gave him a sticker for each time he peed and he got a prize when he earned 5 stickers and a treasure box for when he pooped...he got to pick an inexpensive trinket from the box when he pooped on the potty). He's only had one pee accident and no poop accidents! I wouldn't force the issue otherwise you will both end up frustrated. He can be strong-willed so I found it helpful to make it "his idea" to use the potty. I hope this helps. hd

Hi!

We did a fun thing and promised our boy a "potty" party. We wrapped up his big boy pants, fun wipes, treats and a few little toys. We only invited grandma and grandpa to this party :). We told him, when he started going in the big potty and no diapers, he could have a party, but after his party he could no longer go in his diaper (or anywhere but the potty). It worked!

I have a boy who turned 3 in Mar. Last summer I kept pushing him to sit on the potty. But he was hesitant and seemed scared for some reason. So I would stop pushing it and wait a month. Something told me he just wasn't ready. And I was getting pressure from other people that he was old enough to start potty training. But I listened to my instincts. In Jan. he seemed to be more ready so I tried again. I started putting underwear and pants on him when we were just going to be home, And then he'd wet his pants and I rush him to the potty. When he'd get some in the potty, I'd give him lots of praise. I had to do more laundry but it helped him to know when he had to go. With in a few days he told me when he was going peepee. And I was able to take him to the potty before he wet himself. He was potty trained in about a month, where he was going potty during the night too. Every child is different. If your son is scared or hesitant, wait a month He'll be more ready some day. It also helped my son to be around a 4 yr,old who went by himself. That made him want to go by himself. Listen to your son and to your instincts. It'll happen when he's ready.

j

The biggest piece of advice I can give is don't do pull ups, go straight to underwear and don't look back. What worked with my son is we gave him a specific date ("after Christmas there are no more diapers!") and at every diaper change we reminded him of that. He got to pick out some underwear and that is what he wore after Christmas. The diapers went away and we didn't get them out again! It was really just one hard week. Then he had it. One thing we did a couple of times during that week, and my son hated it so he wanted to avoid doing it by going tot he potty himself, was we "practiced" if he had an accident. We would start out in every room and practice running to the potty from every room. This is something my sister did that they suggested in "Potty training in one day". And with my sister she did use the "Potty training in on day" book and it did work for her son.
Hopefully I gave you something helpful. Good luck!

K.,
I would HIGHLY recommend the book: Toilet Training in Less Than a Day, by doctors Azrin and Foxx. It's a cheap little book (like 6 bucks) and you can get it at B&N or Amazon.com and have it in hand in a couple of days.
You would need to get a "betsy wetsy" type of doll and some treats, then dedicate a day to doing nothing but potty training - no TV, no emailing or phone calling - just you and your boy giving it your full attention. It's awesome!
Blessings, S.

My daughter turns 2 on July 7 and is potty trained as of a week ago. We did the 3 day type method and boy was I sceptical! But it worked. By the end of the week she was trained. We started on a monday (I made sure in advance that I had that week to stay at home with her) and I just let her run around with only a tshirt for that first week. She did have several wetting accidents, but for the most part she did really great with getting to the potty. Oh, we also did a sticker reward chart. The second week (which ends today) we added underwear. She does fine getting her underwear down and off, but has a hard time with shorts. Lucky for us we just put her in dresses for now!!
Again, I was pretty amazed that it went so easily and so fast. But also, this is my third baby and they have all been different. My oldest, trained early too, but my second was well past 3 before she did. Good luck.

Each child is different, so time schedule will be too. If he is dry for two hours straight his bladder is ready to be potty trained. put pulll ups on him and be prepared to (train yourself) for a few days to take him fairly often to potty, pleasantly, and talk about being big boy like daddy etc. and maybe have them go at some time. Reward him, or praise him when he goes, and if you think it is about time for Poop, let him set on the potty chair with a book to look at so he will sit there long enough to actually go and then be proud of being a big boy.

I thought I would potty train my son at 3 1/2, too. I just got him trained in April. His 4th birthday was in March. He wasn't interested either and scared of the potty as we found out months later. I did get some wonderful advice from the moms on this website along with his pediatrician. Just don't be in a hurry and don't expect too much too soon. You can't make him use the potty no matter how hard you try until he is ready. I made lots of mistakes, but finally was determined to be patient, follow his lead and be ultra supportive and then it happened. Also, use training pants. They absorb a lot more than underware and they still let him feel wet. You can buy them at Babies r us and Walmart. Good luck to you and your little boy!!!

I did the 3 day potty training with my daughter when she was 29 months old. They say in the guide you should do it when they are 22 months old, but I didn't know that was the perfect age. It worked great for us she was pee potty trained by the third. She never had an accident day or night. Now the poop was a different story. I did not follow the guide like I should have which was my fault. It took us another 2 months to finally get that down. I think had I followed it exactly she would have had both down in three days. Just remember there can be no diapers, pull-ups or training pants. It is messy even when they are pooping in the underwear everyday for 2 months, but hopefully that will not happen to you. Good luck!

I have potty trained 2 boys. My oldest I started both when they ware 2. It was a struggle for me but we made it. I used two different ways with each and not sure one worked better or not. With the second one I spent a whole day with him alone. He ran around w/o a diaper on and the potty was in the kitchen. I had him drink juice, water and sprit and every 15 minutes we would go to the potty. If he had an accident we just cleaned it up and then repeated what we do to go to the potty. I even used his favorite stuffed animal to pretend it was going. I always used M&M's for going on the potty...1 for pee and 2 for poop.

My daughter is 22 months and showing interests, however I'm waiting to start with her because we have a big move coming up. I'm not sure my boys were ready at 2 so I think you will be better off. Just don't make a big deal out of the accidents.

We just successfully transitioned my 3 1/2 yr old son to underwear a couple of months ago. He was very potty resistant, so we tried every method possible. For us, the potty party (Potty Train Your Child in Just One Day by Teri Crane) method was a fun way to start, although we definitely needed more than a day! We used a pirate theme, and he had to earn his way down the treasure path to get to the treasure box. Every time he used the toilet he got one step closer (about 8 steps), and the treasure at the end was a trip to Wiggle Play Center. Between toilet trips we watched potty training videos, read books, played games, etc. After, he tried using the potty several times a day, but then eventually regressed to only using his pull-ups. We used sticker reward charts to keep encouraging him, but he stopped caring about that too. So, we then did 3 bare-bottom days and told him he could run around without pants, but he had to use the toilet and not pee or poop on my floor. I covered the couches with bed liners, and put several squares on the floor for him to sit on. He loved it and had no accidents! Then as soon as we put underwear and pants on, he wet his pants every time. At this point we knew it was a choice, since he had no problems on the bare-bottom days (which is recommended for potty resistant children), so I took away all his tv time (use whatever privilege will hit home) and he had to earn it by using the toilet. I did not punish for accidents, I just reminded him that he wasn't earning tv time, and he would have to miss his favorite show if he didn't use the toilet. He then had the option to use tv time as he earned it (5-10min increments) or save it for a movie at the end of the day. In two days he was in underwear full-time. He has only had a few accidents since then, but each time we have him change and clean himself, put his clothes in the washing machine, and wait by the machine until they are clean (a fabulous suggestion from mamasource!). If there's no physical reason preventing potty training, then it's just about finding the right incentive, and not making it into a power struggle. Just keep trying different tactics (with no expectations!) and eventually something will click. Good luck!

Hilarious. I was just reading all of the responses because we have been wondering when to start our 22 month old on the PT process. He has a potty and sits on it but we have not pushed the issue much and he has yet to put anything in it (except for a couple of toys and books on occasion). I asked him if he wanted to go potty and he said yes. He sat for a bit and read books, tried standing to peepee in his potty and then asked to use the big potty. I threw a fruit loop in the potty and he tried to rescue it out. I told him it was dirty, etc. He begged and begged to eat it and wanted more soweal (his word for cereal). Too funny. I've heard about this tactic for years but never imagined this response. Maybe this one wont work for us. :) Good luck.