Need Ideas for Pet Memorial

What about gathering all of the photos you can with your family and pet...everything you can find. Go to kinkos and have color copies made. Get either a bunch of small frames or a large poster board and go to work. You can buy unique
sayings in the form of stickers or little metal tags (scrapbooking stores, target etc) with quotes or words that might pertain to your family/pet relationships. You could have each child make their own (to hang in their rooms) or a larger collage to hang in a family room or area.

So sorry for your loss. Pets become such an integral part of the family, it is absolutely devistating when we lose them. Best wishes to you and your family.

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Hi A. -
What a sad time for you and your family. I am sure that your dog gave you many years of wonderful memories to cherish. There is a great picture book titled: Tenth Good Thing About Barney by Judy Viorst that may fit your need perfectly. I found an excellent summary and have copied it for you below. I work in a school library and often recommend this book to families that have lost a pet. This book is suitable for all ages.

http://www.preschooleducation.com/br268.shtml
"Everyone who is a parent and has pets will eventually be faced with the sad reality of their child experiencing the death of a beloved pet. The Tenth Good Thing About Barney not only helps your child identify his feelings and accept the inevitable-but explains the ritual of death through a funeral.
Erik Bleguad's gentle sketches help tell the story of a boy and his cat-and how with the loving and tender help of his family, learns to cherish his memories and be at peace with knowing Barney could now be in a special place called heaven.
The symbolism of planting seeds to grow helps the boy understand life vs. death, and the never ending circle of life we all come to understand. The Tenth Good Thing About Barney will help you to comfort your child or grandchild through a difficult time in their little life, and allow them to grieve appropriately."

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Good morning April, I am glad I read this, because I think I might be able to give you an idea.

I am so sorry your kids had to witness such a shocking thing, I can't imagine what is going on in their hearts at the moment and yours trying to stay strong while you have your own feelings of loss.
I am imagining you will be placing your dog to rest near your garden...if so, perhaps you can share a burrial ceremony with your kids. Mine always participated willingly, ask them first.

To me, pets are family, and the link of love is everlasting between your kids and their beloved dog.
Taking active part in the going away/letting go ceremony gives your children something to hold on to until they accept the fact that their friend is no longer here.
It might be a good idea if they gather in a small box some items of theirs, to send out with the dog, also an old shirt perhaps, something that has their smell, and make that the dogs shraud. Also, place in the burrial some of the dogs toys, a bit of food, why not...smiles*...the Egyptians did this in hopes that the transition from earth to heaven would be easy. Whatever your believes are, this will be comforting to your boys and for the two of you, guide your kids to say a few words of gratitude for the good times, devotion and playfulness shared. I hope this helps, it is only an idea and you and your family will come up with more suitable things to do. Just remember it is a celebration of life, and it teaches your kids about life's circle, death included.

I have not written about me in this site because I just joined, may be for the second time and never thought I had much to say, my kids ages range from 33 to 14... I am glad for the opportunity to share. I am a professional artist, a painter and also love making ethnic art dolls, you can find my work at http://www.G..com.

Bright Blessings to your day, may the spirit of love abides in your family today.
G.

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A couple of ideas for you. You can buy one of the kits to make your own stone (the kids put jewels, etc. and then can write the dog's name, dates, etc) and put it in a special place in the yard where you dog loved to play.

Another important idea is for your kids to make a memory book. You can have them write (or dictate) their memories of special times and activities they had with the dog. If possible, you can add photos. Then you can look at it whenever you'd like.... snuggle up on the couch and remember the dog. One last idea is for each of them to write a letter to the dog about what they'll miss, what they loved, etc. This can be in place of the memory book.

Hope this helps.

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Hi Pam,

When we have lost a pet or someone in our family, what I have done for my boys is I get some balloons. We take sharpie pens and write our individual notes on the balloon and let it go up in the sky. When my oldest son was 4 years old, we lost my husbands grandmother. Branden was very close and had a real hard time of understanding. On the day of the funeral, I went got the balloons. He held them throughout the whole service. When we went to gathering afterwards, he was ready to let them go and he went to get his dad. They went to the field and let them go. Now they are 14 and 12 and we still do it. It really helps. We still talk about all the good times we had with them. I hope this may help. '

Love,
T. Caldwell

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I'm sorry for the loss of your pet. It's hard to lose such an important part of the family. I understand the need to do something to preserve her memory.

The boys are old enough to help with a project. What about putting together a scrapbook or photo album? Have the boys help pick out the pictures and have each of them write their favorite memory of her. It wouldn't have to be a major project (unless you wanted to spend the time). Creative Memories has a quick kit made especially for pets. It could be completed as an afternoon project. If you're all up to a longer project, a photo album of your kids growing up with your dog would help them remember the happy times. The beauty of this project is that they can come back to it over and over again to remember the stories and your youngest can keep the few memories she has alive as well.

HTH.

S. Langmead in San Jose

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I am so sorry to hear of your families loss. I share the experience and pain of such an event.

I comfort myself and my sons with the knowledge that they are safe and healthy awaiting our arrival in heaven, along with other cherished family members.

Would it be possible to plant and flower plant or small tree where your beloved pet was buried? Perhaps place a small bench or chair there, where they can have quiet talks and rememberances of their time together. You can order a stone with the name and dates to place there as well. It is laser cut I think and it is quite reasonable in price too.

I hope this will offer some comfort and stimulate some ideas that will suite your family needs at this time.

Best wishes,
K. A. Belill

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sorry 4 your loss. there is a great book called dog heaven by cynthia rylant and it can be a comfort to read and keep. we wrote a note to our dog, wrapped her in my bathrobe and put her favorite things in with her when we burried her. good luck.

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Find and read the story, "The Tenth Good Thing About Barney" This is a great book about losing a pet.

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When my children were young and we lost our beloved cat, I had our favorite photo of him enlarged and put in a shadowbox type of frame with his collar, catnip mouse, etc. Put in anything that is special to your dog. Put it up on the wall in the family room, so the children can see that she was important to the whole family. A friend of mine used their favorite photo to have a young local artist paint a portrait of their dog that hangs in their family room. Hope these ideas help.

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Get a bunch of pictures of her, and create a collage with the children, or have each of them do their own. You can make it scrap booking if you'd like. You can have each child write something about her. You'll have to write down what your three year old says for her. Afterwards, have the collage(s) framed and hang them up.

You can also do scrap book pages and have a book devoted to her. My daughter loves looking at the pictures of our cat who has passed on, and our pet rats who have passed on.

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So sorry for your loss. I lost a dog of 17 yrs, prior to adopting our latest dog..I framed a special photo of him. Since we rented I didn't do a backyard memorial. He had to be put down to stop suffering. I really grieved the loss and we missed his presence and sound of his feet..maybe the kids would to care for a plant or flower in her honor, or donate to a shelter in memory of your beloved, maybe a special scrapbook to look at when you miss her most, or special rocks in your yard..go with your hearts...I know my,Baron, lived a long life because we loved and cared for him so much..and he loved us...what a long life you shared with your pet. I hope you find comfort just knowing how great a life you provided this much loved pet. Maybe after healing you will feel it upon your heart to rescue a dog who may really need your love. I pray you'll find comfort in however you choose to honor her.

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Hi A.,
Loosing a beloved pet is a huge emotional benchmark in our children's lives. When my daughter's hamster died she was devastated. She was 10 years old at the time. I helped her prepare a little burial box. We lined it with silk cloth and prepared a soft bed of down inside for "Hammy" to rest in. We picked a special site on our property and we prepared to say our goodbyes. One thing that was very special to my daughter was that we made a cross out of wood and then we decoupaged pictures of littly Hammy on to it. We staked it into the ground when we buried her. The picture gathering and reminiscing of fun times and creating the project was very healing. I also believe in and shared with my daughter, that no matter how small a life is, it is a life with a soul it has shared with us. We gave thanks to special Hammy for being in our lives and for sharing life lessons with us. Honoring our loved ones life and giving thanks is so important in the goodbye. My heart is with you and I hope that you and your family find peace through this part of your path. It will begin forming the rituals your children will use throughout their lives which will help them work through their losses. As time has gone on and we have lived through more pet losses (cat, dog, horse)we began also creating honoring alters with pictures, and special things that were part of the pets life. The alter is somewhere in the house where you see it everyday. This way you can stop by it, cry, smile, give thanks, remember special times and say whatever you need to over time. Sometimes the alter stays up for more than a year. Then we move it on when the time is "right". This way every member of the family has the time they need to go through their grieving process.

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I am so sorry for your loss. I know how difficult it is to lose a beloved pet.

We have a memory book which includes all of our pets. We started the book when our daughter was a baby (she's 29 and a mom now). We include photos and stories about the good times we shared. It is one of our treasured keepsakes. The last entry was the absolute hardest for me. I added a curl of Hailey's hair and all the condolence letters I received from all the veterinarians who treated her during her illness. It's been three years since she passed, and I still think of her every day. I miss her a lot, but I have a new golden retriever, who has been a wonderful companion and has helped ease the pain of losing Hailey. D.

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Hi,
First of all, my deepest condolences to you on your loss. Losing a pet is devastating and I'm sure she was so very much a part of your family.
We lost our 13 1/2 lab to cancer over the summer. He had diabetes and arthritis but after not bouncing back from a minor growth removal, we had an ultrasound. I still think about him every day.
We had a memorial service for him where everyone got a chance to say something. My girls are too young, but I spoke and so did my husband and several of our friends. I will never forget it. We had it overlooking the ocean where we used to walk him and afterwards came back to the car where we had coffee and dessert. I had made mugs on zazzle.com with a picture of him on one side and the words "I Love Julio" on the other side.
We contriubted to a website called olddoghaven which is up in Washington. Our hopes was that other older dogs would know the love that our our Julio had known in his life.
D.

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Hi there,

I am so sorry for your loss. It can be devastating to both your children and the adults in the family. When we lost our family cat to and old age death, I had my 11 year old daughter hug and kiss him goodbye before she left for school. The cat died in my arms about an hour later. The cat had been a part of the family and had been here ever since my child was born. She dressed him in doll clothes, fed him people food, shared the computer chair with him, slept with him............... just like your family dog, a very devastating loss.

I buried Big Kitty in the back yard under the redwood trees while my daughter was still at school and then when she came home we planted some really nice flowers all over the grave. We went to the nursery and got a nice statue ( a sleeping cat with wings). To sit in the garden. The most important part aside from letting my daughter pick out plants and help plant them was that I made a nice cross and painted it white. Then I gave my daughter acrylic paints and let her decorate the cross. She put his name and the date on it, and painted flowers all over it and a picture of her Big Kitty with angel wings. Then she painted "I LOVE YOU" at the bottom of the cross. I noticed it and jumped in saying "Oh honey, that part won't show, that is the part that goes in the ground...." She calmly replied, "I didn't paint it for us to see mom, I painted it to go in the ground for Big Kitty to see." Totally choked up I had to run out of the room!

The main thing is to create something, a grave, a garden, a memory spot...... Where the kids can be a part of it, and it will be a place where they can greave. The place will be a place of closure. I think that is the important part. Even I talk to those (now it is 2 cats there) cats when I am out watering! It is a joy to see the flowers bloom, and we now joke that we had to lay the 2 cats back to back to sleep in their graves because they really did not like each other too much! So we didn't want them lying face to face for an eternity.

A bench can be added and we of course have since added more plants each season and 2 more statues had appeared. One a nice sitting cat (cement) and a cute cupid like angel sitting amongst the plants.

Inside the house, I created a photo album for the pet. I scoured all my photo albums and found enough to fill the pages of a small 4x6 album. For the other cat my daughter made me a nice DVD slide show on our Macintosh computer set to music of my cat. I ironically had just taken some really nice photos of the cat out in our front yard while all the roses were in bloom just weeks before that cat was mauled to death my neighborhood dogs. The images were still on the memory card in the camera when the cat died.

Lastly I made a nice collage shadow box that had photos of the cat, a piece of the label off the food bag, the collar and tag and a clip of fur. That hangs in my daughter's room. On the computer you can make some photos sepia, or black and white, and make a few special ones in color, that way the special ones stand out.

Even a garden bench can be made with wood or cement. While the cement is wet the kids can write the pets name in it and press leaves from the dog's favorite tree or bush into it to leave a pattern. You can go to a place that will let you decorate your own tile with glaze and they will fire it for you. The kids can make a memory tile that can be put into the bench design.

I hope some of these ideas help. Letting the kids be a part of what ever you do is what will help them with their emotions. And having a place to go to "visit" the pet will be a good idea, just as we sometimes go to the grave of a relative.

Time will soften the hurt, it will never go away.

Cathy

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Put up a bird feeder and let the kids put bread in it everyday. When the birds come to feed it will warm all your hearts.Wild birds will eat almost anything you put out, Seeds cooked rice old bread old cereal.squirrles may join into the fun too. Have the kids make it too, be creative hang it by your dogs old collar,or paint his name on it. when the kids grow up they will remember how and why it was made. Best of luck to your family and im so sorry for your loss. Another thought, the animal shelter, it always has a sad dogs just waiting for you to come and save its life. Open your heart and the rest will follow.

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First, I am so sorry for you and your family--dogs have always been a mainstay of my life and the loss of such an important family member is difficult.

Second, I'm big on scrapping memories (and no, I'm not a consultant for anyone :) ). Spend an afternoon gathering favorite pictures of your pet and putting them in an ablum. This does not have to be super-involved: you can find a "two-up" album, one where you slip pictures into one of two sleeves on each side of the page and put three pics in saving the fourth for journaling on a piece of paper. Let everyone do a pile and just sitting around, talking and laughing about silly/happy things you did with your dog or you dog did.

I did an album for my dad when his beloved German Shepherd had to be put down and it's still in a place of honor. Feel free to email for more information if you want to take this route or for pictures.

Good luck to you all--remember to laugh and it will keep your dog closer with good feelings. {:)

M.

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I agree with Antoinette K. about the "stepping stone." When our pet died, we made one using special glass stones, found objects, and using a design we worked out together. We have it on our patio where we can see it whenever we go out, and it did seem to help. I have also made a scrapbook using pictures we collected and our favorite memories. The scrapbook cheered everyone up, because we recalled all of our favorite "Ginger" stories.

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Hi,
What we did when our dog died, was making a photocollage in the style of Dia de leas Mortas, very shiny and vivid colrs we used as a background but also used as a decoration around the pictures, it is still hanging in our family room and it is 3 yrs ago when she died. Also my oldest daughter build her and altar on her chest of drawers, with the dog's picture,beautiful things like gems and shells, candles, every now and then she picks fresh flowers, and she has the box with her ashes there also. She doesn't want to scatter them, what I thought would also be a good ritual, to go to her favorite place, in our case the beach, and scatter the ashes and say something orso.
My daughter also wrote several stories about this dog of hers, She is still sad about it and that is OK.A few days ago we were sitting at our dinner and talking about what we would do if we had three wishes that would be granted, her first wish was that Beezus(our dog)would be turned alive again. I think accepting it to be a big loss is a big part of letting go. I wish you well. C.

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I just lost my beloved dog of 15.5 years in September. I had her cremated and kept her ashes. The cremation company sent me a great poem, which I'm thinking of incorporating into a scrapbooked page that I'll frame. If you'd like a copy of the poem, entitled, "Rainbow Bridge", please let me know (or maybe you can find it online?). Other ideas might be to plant a tree and place a little inscription on it. I'm still thinking of ideas myself! Good luck and sorry for your loss.

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I am so sorry to hear about your dog. We just lost our 2 dogs within 3 months of each other. My daughter was only 1 1/2 years old so she really didn't understand, but when it was time to get rid of her pacifier, we attatched to a bunch of balloons and told her that her doggies needed them in heaven and then she let them go into the air. She never asked for the pacifiers again. Anyway, one of the things we did was to buy a cedar tree to plant. Our dogs where always sleeping under the one cedar tree that we had so we thought it would be a good way to remember them and to watch something beautiful grow out of something tragic. Talk with your children about special memories that they have of your dog and ask them what they would like to do to remember her. Each one may come up with a different way to heal there pain. Make sure to follow through with what each one wants to do. I hope this helps you in your time of pain and I wish your family the best.

A.

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You could make a memorial slide show with music with favorite pictures of your pet and your pet with family members that you all could watch whenever you are missing him/her. Also, you could make a collage to hang on the wall with pictures too. And you could make a memorial wall plaque to hang on the wall with the dog's name spelled out in sea shells (if you live near the ocean) or some other unique item(s) that remind you and your family of the dog.

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We helped a friend throught the greving process by making a stuffed animal an angel we were lucky and found a dog like hers. Good Luck. Just remember how blessed you all were to have had your pet for 15 years. I know it's hard on the kids because she has always been there.

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April, it is devistating to lose a beloved member of the family. I think it is even more difficult in that they were there when the accident occured. However, helping with the burial was a wise idea. I too have a 10 yr old son and asked him what might help if we were to lose one of our dogs and we came up with the following: Make a clay version of the dog. Each child could use the kind of clay available in arts an d crafts type stores which will harden in the air. Then they could have their remembrance with them, as my son said -- on their desck, bed or by their door, I also thought of making a wall to remember her. Again, inexpensive frames which the kids could decorate and find some pictures which I am sure you have somewhere over the past 15 years. And they would participate withthe whole process. It would show that she may be gone from this earth, but is never forgotten. I hope this helps a little bit. Lots of love, K.

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My family created a photo album of our dog. The girls helped picked pictures and we all took turns telling and writing stories and memories of special times with her. My girls now love to look at the pictures and read the stories - 2 years later. It is a great memory keeper!

So sorry, and good luck,
D.

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As a child I lost many pets. Our house was a home to almost any stray. Believe it or not Our backyard became a pet cemetery. When I lost my dog I was very upset. I bought a bird bath and placed it in the yard above her and planted flowers around it. I am now 42 and my parents still have the birdbath and flowers growing for my dog. I walk by it and still think and smile at my Wopsi. You could also plant a tree or bush in their memory.
Sorry for you loss. I know it is hard.

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One of the best and most healing ways we have found to relive the memories of our pets - who are our family members - who have died is to go back through our pictures of them through the years, write about them, and put them into a memory album. Creative Memories has a Pet Album kit that would work well and the kids could add their own drawings, etc. I have found it very therapeutic and it helps us bring closure to such a traumatic event. In terms of a physical memorial, the kids could all create a cairn (out of any rocks from your property or buy some specially from a stone/yard supplier) and a headstone (out of one of those stepping stone kits or make your own out of concrete and colored glass pieces) if you have the space to bury your dog on your property; or if you had the dog's ashes put into a special box, they could help design a unique place in your home for your pet to be memorialized.
Finally, getting a new dog after closure helps everyone remember the cycle of life. My thoughts are with you. C. (I've been raised with dogs since I was very little, and I train and show them in the confirmation ring; they sleep/live with our family and mostly hog the couches;-) I am also the family historian.)

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I am so sorry for your loss. It is very difficult to grieve your pet and stay strong for the kids too. I work as a vet tech and recommend that the kids gather pictures of your pet and make a collage. Discuss what they liked best about the pet. Have the older 2 write a letter saying good bye to thier beloved friend. Maybe the little one can draw a picture of your dog. Also let them know that you are sad too, let them cry as much as they need too. There are books available to help parents help children deal with pet loss. Unfortunately, I can not remember the name of the book at this time. I hope this helps. *A good pet never truely dies, they leave thier footprints on our hearts and there they live forever.*

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I'm so sorry to hear about the family dog. I know pets are like family. It's a little late for my idea but keep this in mind with other pets you WILL enjoy in the future. Keeping some paw prints on paper, be it art paper or journal, is a way to 'anticipate' healing projects. The more the better. My children are now grown but, as life usually goes, parents keep the family pets and that was my case. I wrote an 8 page biography of "The life of Mercedez", our beloved cat of many years. I sent the bio's to my grown children WISHING I had paw prints to send along as well. The healing was amazing, not only for the recipiants, but for the author. Maybe you too, can write the story of your dog and share it as a 'night time story'. Make it funny, make it true, give your pet a happy history for your children to remember.

In addition to paper paw prints you may also want to make clay impression paw prints while they are alive. We do that with our children's hands...why not the dog or cat, right?

By the way, my children were born at home with a midwife attending back in the 1970's. It was in the early day's when women had to fight to have their children at home. Both births were peaceful and joyous. There remains in my heart a special place for the midwife who patiently stayed at my side during the birth of my children. You continue to study hard and be diligent in your dream to become a midwife. You will find that you will leave a 'foot print' in many a lives for the services you provide. I wish you well in your endeavor.

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I am so sorry for your loss. My family has always considered our pets as furry, but equally important, memebers. When we lost our dog after 12 years and a horrible battle with cancer, we put him in the garden and planted things that reminded us of him. We also bought a cement hand print kit and put our own eulogy down for him like a tombstone. Over the years we have added little things; statuary, different plants, and we put his doghouse near by and turned it into a squirrel feeder. He would have loved that! I think a project would help your children, maybe poems and handprints? The older boys could always build a little something as a memorial. I bet there are some good ideas on the web, some kind of work will be good for everyone. Good luck and take care.

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Sorry for your loss. My mother in law recently lost her dog, and they held a memorial where everyone who loved the dog shared some of their favorite stories about her. There was also a slideshow with pictures of the dog. Someone also gave them an engraved stone about her being a beloved pet, etc. which they keep in their yard near the front door where the dog often sat. Maybe you could get one of those step stone kits you decorate yourself?

I hope these ideas work for your family and that the 15 wonderful years outweigh the loss. Best of luck.

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I am so sorry for your loss. I can only imagine the sadness. Check out Gardenmolds.com. They have a wonderful kit for creating your own concrete pet 'headstone', although it lays flat on the ground. I was really impressed with the craftsmanship and I like that it is a kit that you can personalize with your dog's name, and your kids could help. Sincere condolences.

D.
Carmichael, Ca

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michaels has a stepping stone kit.. that would make a monument for your precious family member. kids could design it themselves, you can write in the cement... they'd love that... and it's something they can do.

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Creating a marker for where you buried her is a good idea. Make it a special art project. Or have the older ones write something to her and bury that with her (maybe it is too late for that). It is devastating but the pain does soften over time. It is important how you show your kids the process of grief now, because this will be a wonderful opportunity for them to learn how to deal with it. Be as authentic as you can.

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Hi there,
One thing I have tried might work for you. It did for us when my daughters dog died. We had a little memorial service at the park and we released balloons into the air. We made dog shaped balloon animals and had her talk to the balloon about how she was feeling as if she were talking to her dog. (This may take a little cajoling to get the older ones to do it, but once they start, they can't stop themselves. You might also tell them to help the younger ones by leading by example.) Once she was done pouring her heart out, she released the balloon and said goodbye to her pet. The next step I will leave at your discretion. We went to our local pet store that allowed children to handle puppies that were for sale. We explained what we were doing to the employee and he had no problem allowing my daughter to hold and play with a couple puppies for a while. It soothed her after the very emotional "memorial" we had just done.
Good luck. I hope you find the right project to help your children say goodbye to their friend.

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Sorry to hear about your pet. I lost a cat of 18 years a few years ago, and my two nieces were devastated. We put together a memory box (just a cardboard box) and actually fit the cat in there, along with photos of each one of us so that he wouldn't forget us when he got to kitty heaven, they each made a card to let him know how much they loved him, we put in his favorite toys, tied the box up with a pretty ribbon, and buried him in the yard. We made stepping stones and put them on top as a marker. That evening we lit tea candles, each put one on top of the stepping stones, said a little prayer for him to have a safe trip to heaven. One of my nieces (4 years old at the time) watched the candles from inside the house until they went out, then said to me, "He's okay, that's just his bones there, he's in heaven now." I think it really helped them let go. I, on the other hand, cried for months! Best wishes.

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Have the kids make a memorial garden stone for your lost family member. You can find the kits for this at Michaels. You can put it the yard at her favorite spot to play. They could also put together a scrap book of pictures and drawings that are all about the dog and her life with your family.

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Sorry to hear of your loss..Maybe you could go and buy a baby tree of some sort and let the kids dig the whole and plant it and name it after their dog, that way they can watch it grow and think of her everytime they see it.
T

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I am so sorry for your loss. I am a huge dog lover with 2 dogs. One is 10 and the other is 13. I was thinking that you might want to make a collage of your dog and family to hang on the wall. This way your family can honor her and still see what a great life she had with you. I hope this helps, although I know only time will help you heal. d.

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Hi, I am so deeply sorry for your loss! I lost my dodg of 14 yrs 11 years ago and I still miss her, If you can o some kin of mosaic stepping stone or even a bench near where she /he is buried or for your yard you can try to find doggie pottery maybe dog bowls you can find , buy or your dogs that you can break up -as part of the loss /fixing an save it forever, you can also do a rive in your neighborhoo schoolets, for dog items, towels,sheets for the spca or shelter near you an donate maybe bringing the things to other dogs will make them feel emotion, they might even feel really sorry for one and you could adopt not to replace but to give a hope/ new life to an abandoned doggie--og lover and teacher...just some ideas, ps our neighbor just lost their dog and got a puppy a month later -I thought it was too soon for me....if that were me but the kis are really responding well. the shelter thing coul be months down the road-Liza

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First off, let me offer you my condolences. I'm sorry for your loss, and I hope you find the perfect memorial project to help your family through.

Perhaps try getting the family together and making a scrapbook. Include pictures of each of the kids with the family pet, and write out some of the special memories you each have about your dog. Even the three-year-old could use things like stickers and stamps to help express how she feels. As time goes by, it can be a comfort to have those images and words to spark conversation amongst the family about all those good memories.

Also, you might try getting one of those plaster stepping-stone kits and making a special grave marker, and/or planting a tree or bush nearby in her honor (if you used a pet cemetery for the burial, check first on what their policies are for bringing in outside items like that).

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sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved family pet. we had a similar situation but had to take our dog to be put down in the end which was very hard, but had to be done. we put together a collage of pictures of him and our daughter and it hangs in the hall. she looks at it often to remember him and now has her own way of "taking care of him"...each time she gets a balloon at a party, or restuarant or whatever she has decided that she wants to send it to heaven to be with her dog...so she writes I love you Moose on it and puts her name and "lets it go to him in heaven, so he can have it to play with." she is only 5 but its her way of staying in touch with him and its so heart warming when she does it - you can tell she remembers him and still loves him. he died when she was 3 so its been 2 yrs but she still remembers.

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It's devastating to loose a pet. I lost my cat, Truman, years before I met my husband and had a family and I still have his ashes in a little wooden box. There are times I still cry when I talk about him. I wrote a poem immediately following his passing and sent it to our local paper's pet writer, Gary Bogue, and he published it.

Perhaps you and your children could write their favorite memory, draw pictures of him, or put your pets favorite things in a little capsule that you could bury and make a spot or memorial area where you could all take time to talk to and remember your beloved pet. Just a thought. There are web sites where you could order personalized rocks/stones with your pets name on it to mark the spot. Or, it may also be helpful if you can create a memory book or photo album of you and your family with your dog. That way they can open it and have fun telling stories, impromptu or not.

Best of luck to you and your family. And I'm so very sorry for your loss.

J. P.

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