Need Advice on Ways to Break the News to My Mother That I'm Pregnant Again!

J., I would wait til you are around 12 weeks to announce your news. Have everyone over and tell everyone, and DON'T look at your mother. You don't need this in your life or memory, thinking about her reaction.

If she says something to you about ignoring her, tell her that you didn't want a replay of her actions from last time, that it hurt your feelings and is something you can't forget. I hope that this will at least keep her from making any negative comments. If she says something negative anyway, tell her you don't want to hear it, and walk away.

Congrats on your pregnancy!

D.

7 moms found this helpful

I'd wait until 12 weeks and then call her with the happy news. Doesn't matter if she's happy, sad, worried, etc. Just blurt it out.

I had 4 kids in 5 1/2 yrs. My oldest daughter had 3 in 4 1/2 yrs. Having kids close together is great.

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What I wish I would have said to my Mom...Hey Mom, I'm pregnant, suck it up. My Mom was such a turd when I told her I was pregnant with my first. Her reaction was, it's a little soon don't you think ( I got pregnant on my honeymoon). I agree though, tell her in a public setting. Your memory should me a good one. Congrats!!!

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I have a mother simular. Each time I was pregnant I dreaded telling her. She was never happy about it until after the baby was here. She was always the last to know and I liked keeping it that way. I would wait until you start to show and just do it bluntly.
And your SIL is right dont let her rain on your parade.

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I never tell anyone before 10 weeks and try to wait for 12. I made it to 10 with baby #1 and made it to 12 with #2. Relax, enjoy the secret with your husband and don't even tell your kids at this point. You will have plenty of time to share your secret later. Happy New Year and congratulations!

C.

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Wait, it sounds like you already told her, otherwise why would you say she was not excited and rolling her eyes and such... do you men that is how she reacted with your last pregnancy? I'm confused! If she already knows and is being a snot, you don't need to preach to her about anything, just go on with your life. If she doesn't know, then you have no idea how excited she may be. In any case, I just told my mom over the phone, she was thrilled. I was about 12-14 weeks when I told her. It's usually a little better to wait anyways until it is really a viable pregnancy and your hormones are doing a little better. Oh, and congrats!

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Congrats on your pregnancy!!! Don't let anyone else steal your joy and happiness.GL

M

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Why wouldn't she be happy -or at least "OK" with it? Is she supporting or helping to support you or the kids in some way? Is she their daycare or something? If you're not relying on her for any type of money or childcare or anything (and you don't live with her), then I don't see her problem. Just tell her and go about your business. I know it's your mother and you want her to be happy for you, but if she won't be, then enjoy yourself anyway. You may want to ask her why she isn't happy about any of your subsequent pregnancies. Perhaps there's a health issue she's worried about or something. If she thinks your life should be something else -well, that ship has sailed, hasn't it? Tell her it is what it is, and you're happy with it, so she should be happy for you.

I'm so sorry. Your mother has been taught wrongly about children. They are a great blessing. They are her future. Can you have your daughter tell her? ;) Just remember all of this when your children are having children. Change the dynamics on this for your future generations. Embrace the children, and be thankful for them. And let your kids know how blessed you are to have them. They really do understand when we act or say things that indicate our hearts are grieved that we have them. Heartbreaking.

I agree with the other ladies who suggest waiting until you are further along. I also think, if she's going to be unpleasant, that you just mail/email her a little note (don't they do "We're pregnant!" announcements now?) and let her decide whether or not to respond. Obviously you want to tell her but why let her take any joy from you. Congratulations by the way. I hope everything goes well with your pregnancy. :-)

Mother's are such strange creatures. Of course, i won't be one of them!!!

Part of me says wait a while. You are only 6 weeks along and I know that you want to tell her and gain her approval but if you don't think you'll get it, screw it - just wait.

Now the other part of me says that if it's going to drive you nuts not telling her and the suspense of her reaction is stressing you out, then just tell her, get it over with and move on.

I think you just need to decide which scenario you can handle best.

Good luck and CONGRATS!!!