Near 3 Yr Old Daughter Trouble Potty Training

I'm just finishing up potty training my third daughter, and honestly they are all different. This one pretty much trained herself. We put the potty out and let her sit on it and try sometimes and if she did pee or poop in the potty made a big deal about it - cheering, etc. But we really didn't do much actual training. Once she was very close and staying dry for long stretches, etc. I was a little more strict about making her try potty sometimes, but it really was all very smooth and she basically trained herself. Of course, she was easier than many.

My older two were much tougher - I think in part because they really didn't mind a wet (or even poopy) bottom nearly as much. For each, we had to use a different type of incentive. We've done stickers/charts, but my kids seem to lose interest pretty quickly. With my oldest we eventually went to money. I know it sounds awful, but it was something that meant something to her. So she got a dime if she peed in the potty and a dollar if she pooped in the potty. Then every few days or so we would take her to the dollar store to spend her loot. My mom used to tease we'd go broke if it kept up, but after a few weeks we just tapered off the money. She did love hearing her coins drop into her bank (we used a special princess bank I'd bought on clearance) and getting to buy stuff mommy always said no to.

With my second, it was honestly more about control than rewards. What ended up working for her (and we used it some with the third) was a timer. I would set the timer for an appropriate amount of time (30-60 minutes usually, depending on when I thought she'd have to go), and when the timer beeped it was time to go potty. We made a big deal about it being *her* potty timer and let her push the start/stop buttons, etc. and told her she was in charge of making sure she went and tried when the timer beeped. We still had to push sometimes, but overall this worked for her.

Looking back, it's nice if you can just introduce the idea and let the kid transition gradually in their own time, but I know this isn't always feasible. And you need to work with each kids' personality and what's important to them. Oh, we also found having loved ones send new panties was great - look, grandma sent you Dora panties, she knows you're a big girl, etc. - helped. Santa was delivery person for my youngest one's big girl panties! Good luck - it will happen and you soon won't remember the struggle.

My daughter did the same thing. It takes time and patience. Charts are great. Remind her when she has an accident that she is becoming a big girl and that it is unacceptable. Does she associate an activity or thing with being a big girl? Something she wants to do that she can't until she is a big girl. Most of all have patience. She is still young, She will get there. As one pediatrician said "no child goes to college in a diaper"

I had the exact problem with my son. Just back off awhile. Yes, she knows what to do and when to do it. She will potty train. I read ever book on potty training that I could find, but nothing worked. Just give her some time and do not push, because she will push back and win. Good Luck

As Always denise called it! What are you doing when she pees and poops in her pants? This is a year now....oh my...are you accepting it as an accident or are you acknowledging it is on purpose? A chart is a great idea...my daughter charted a big girl room....in the process of finishing it....Strawberry room (very cute).

J.

We just potty trained our daughter who is 2 1/2, at daycare they said that you need to ask them every hour or so and at some times forced them to sit on the potty and try to go. Within a week our daughter was fully potty trained for peeing and the poopy part just came on its own in about 3 weeks, we would show her where poopy went in the toliet and eventually one night she just went on her potty and did her thing and has not had an accident since. Good luck, the chart system does help too and rewards and recognition for doing a good job. We would give our daughter a food treat everytime she went potty and when she did poopy she got a toy.

Hi J.,
have you tried doing a sticker/reward chart to get her motivated? Maybe if there is something she really likes or collects, a "full" chart would mean she gets a prize?

I used the 3 day method with my daughter and it worked great!! Actually, she was potty trained in 4 days but it was still worth every bit. If you would like the method email me at ____@____.com and I will send it to you. It's too big to email on here. :) Good luck!