Naps - North Hollywood,CA

Updated on February 26, 2013
C.P. asks from North Hollywood, CA
8 answers

My daughter will not take naps. She is 8 months old and will take milk breaks for a few minutes but then gets right back up. I don't understand. She sleeps 11 hours through the night but I would rather her take a nap. I don't even have time to clean the house and my husband gets so upset with me because he works all day. I clean but it's not good enough. I get it, the house should be cleaner but what am I supposed to do if she just wants to be held all day? I'm not fond of the crying it out method.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Sounds like you need to let him watch the baby a few times so he can see what it's like.

BYW, if he wants the house cleaner show him the want ads in the paper for ladies who clean houses for a living and tell him you are not his servant.

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C..

answers from Columbia on

1. Tell hubs to suck it.

2. Get one of those baby front packs. Where you can carry her and she faces outwards so she can see, but your hands are free.

3. Ask hubs if he wants a mom or a cleaning lady. Then either put your baby in daycare so you can clean or hire a cleaning lady so you can hang with baby.

4. Tell hubs to suck it again.

I had a daughter who did not nap..... except she didn't sleep 11 hours a night. She went to bed around 11:30 and woke up at 6:30. She slept for about 45 minutes after lunch. So, I feel your pain. You just have to decide with your husband which is more important.

How much time does he spend with the baby when he's home. Maybe if he spends more time with her he will understand that it's hard to be interactive with the baby AND still clean. Or when he gets home.... have HIM be on baby duty and YOU clean etc.

Good Luck.

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Since she sleeps through the night, she might just not be a napper.

Instead see if you can find little breaks during the day (little chunks of time) where you can put her in a bouncy chair or walker, & do some
light cleaning.

Since your hubby is demanding & not understanding of what it takes to be
home w/an infant, only clean what he'll notice. Spot clean.

Let him know that you are doing the best you can & you know he works all day but you clean to the best of your ability given the circumstances. Those circumstances mean an small infant to take care of. (He may have to add his own cleaning to what you've done if he does not think it's super clean.)

3 moms found this helpful

C.H.

answers from Dallas on

Every mom and dad have to adjust and accept that things will not be the same as they were before baby; baby comes first now and everything else after. House cleaning and typical chores are first to get bumped. You both will be getting use to baby for some time, so you both need to stop being h*** o* yrselves and each other. Know that I'm definitely not judging when saying all this. As long as the house is hygienically clean and safe for baby and you all can function daily (clean clothes to wear and clean dishes to eat), then all the other cleaning issues can get rotated on a schedule and done prior to having company. If the company can't understand the house not being up to it's pre-baby condition, they must not ever have had children around! If yr little one is not napping it might be because she is to excited about all the new things she is learning. Baby's grow and learn so fast, they are just as bad as us about not wanting to stop and go to bed. She may need nothing more than a daily nap routine and schedule, which of course will take time for you both to get adjusted to. Figure out a time that it would be good for yr little one to start a nap and get a routine formed. Try things that work at night to get her down. My boys were both happy to fall asleep rocking in my arms nursing, then I'd lay them down to nap on their own for an hour or two. You don't have to leave them to cry it out, just stay with her till she is a sleep and go back to her if she wakes. This will probably be a taxing method for you for a while, but if you keep it up she will eventually adapt and it will be well worth yr efforts! You may want to try some white noise or instrumental lullaby CDs to coax her to sleep. Maybe a mid day bath would sooth her. You know her best, so you'll have to figure out what's suited to her. I always sang or hummed when my babies were very fussy and my kids have always slept better after a bath. I know that they have some marvelous crib light's and sound's soothers, you could always try one and return it if it's a flop. Google ideas. Once you decide on yr routine, stick with it! If it's not consistent then she will not get use to the series of events and their repetition. The routine is meant to make her feel secure, in that she knows the signals in each event and what they mean, and she can be comforted by it all. If you can't keep it consistent she will not get use to it and it will not work well. Know that she will probably not sleep at all for the first times you are introducing this to her. Make it an hour session and even if she didn't fall asleep, you let the routine run it's course so she could experience it Really what's an hour of sitting with her, even if she's fussing, when you think about what yr working towards. You staying with her will let her know that she's not being abandoned in this new routine, you are still at her beck and call, lol! It might take a week to get this routine down to where she falls at sleep at some point, but don't give it up, not even for the weekend. Also, keep in mind that this may affect her nightly schedule some, so be prepared to loose a few hours there. Once it's established you will be so happy for yr efforts. I never let my kids get away with out a nap if I could help it, no matter how much they fought it. My kids are now 6, 5, & 3 and they all still sleep through a daily nap and still go to sleep on time at night without a circus. The real kicker is that my oldest is now in school and she naps on the weekends without a fuss, she is usually my first to fall asleep.

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D..

answers from Miami on

The problem isn't your child not taking a nap. It's your husband being difficult with you. Take off and make your husband watch her all weekend and let him see how the house blows up and that you don't have time to clean it perfectly. Sometimes a husband needs to be humbled by an angry wife to get in his head that he isn't her blankety-blank BOSS.

Part of becoming parents is understanding that life AFTER children is different than life BEFORE children. No one keeps their house as clean after kids, especially with really little ones, as they did before they became parents.

You're going to get NOWHERE with the CIO method when it comes to a nap. When she gets old enough to be left alone, you can institute quiet time in her room for increments of time. But at 8 months, you need to be taking care of her. Take her from room-to-room with you and put her in a play yard in order to get work done. Sing to her, play music, talk to her, give her safe and fun things to play with. You don't need to hold her all day long. You train her to be alongside you while you go about your work. You sit down on the floor with her and play with her and hold her when you take frequent breaks.

You had better figure out that your husband doesn't get to call all the shots about you or your daughter. There are things you cannot MAKE your child do. And there sure are things your husband cannot make YOU do. Stop letting him think that he can.

Dawn

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

What CoMoMom said. Husbands do not have a clue.

The ergo baby carrier is great, comfortable, easy to put on. You can wear the baby on your back like piggy back. My son really liked it and I could do anything wearing him.

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M.H.

answers from Chicago on

Is the no napping new? If so, have you tried teething tablets? If you are stressed out, she is feeding off of your stress.

My son is 4.5 ( he is sitting next to me and wants to be called Pizza Turkey, lol). Had issues with napping when he started teething. And anytime I tried to do anything he was a challenge, if I had nothing to do, he would sleep etc.

Does she like the swing (if you have one) or the excersaucer? you can get them at a second hand store cheaply. My son would play in the excersaucer for long periods. He was safe and we could get things done. This might tire her out so she might snoze.

Good luck.
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J.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Welcome to parenthood! What you want and what the child wants/needs might not coincide. Breathe. A happy child is better than a clean house.

NOTE:
My husband would come home and ask, "So what did you do all day?" The house was just as spotless as it was when he left.

Now he's been a SAHD for almost 9 years and when he started staying home, I'd come home and say, "Oh my gosh! What did you do all day?" (I was laughing inside, but you should have seen the incensed look on his face - priceless! Of course, we had an 18 month old at the time who took 1 nap, so there was less time to clean, BUT there was also less care than for a newborn....and my husband is NOT a multi-tasker. I was just glad our son was alive when I got home. Now he's a SAHD dad who helps me homeschool our 4 kids, while I am at work.)

Child #1: Slept from birth 12-13 hours each night. During the day: slept for 2 hours, awake for 2 hours. Repeat.

Child #2: Slept from birth for 3 hours at night, ate and slept for another 3 hours. Repeat. During the day: TWO 15 minute naps and at 8 months went to ONE!!!

Child #3: Slept from birth 6 hours, ate and slept another 6 hours. During the day: Two 1.5 HOUR naps and at 1 year old went to 1 nap....but age 2 - maybe a nap and by age 3 (no school) NO NAPS.

Child #4: Slept from birth 10 hours at night. During the day: we never knew/know when, how long, for naps. He's 21 months and sometimes he'll take a nap at 10:30am, 3pm OR not at all.

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