My Toddler and the Sofa!

I had this problem with all of mine. (I have three, ages 5, 4 and almost 2) I figured out that they were going to climb, tumble, do other acrobatics whether I liked it or not. So, whenever we were in the living room area I just went ahead and put pillows on the floor around the sofa and moved the side and coffee tables away. The pillows worked great. We had no major spills.

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Hi J. - no punishment needed because he is actively learning balance and consequence here - just place some padding/blankets around the couch if there is no carpet and if he will not pull them up! - this is how they learn; and the fall is not too high up so even if he falls and gets a bump, he will learn - often referred to as a natural consequence. I cannot imagine him getting any type of serious injury by such a fall.

Sounds like he loves challenges - walking on those cushions is much more challenging than the floor! What a guy! You can also remove the cushions off the couch and place them on a clean floor - if you are up for that. This will pass sooner than you think. All three of my sons did this and the next step is they get on the couch and throw off all the pillows. Then they stop that and are on to something else - boy stuff!

Alli

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J., I feel for you. I have a 23 month old that has been doing that for a while. What I'd like to say is to be consistant with telling him to sit on his bottom and he will comply...but let's be honest...when he gets older, he'll wait until you're not looking and then take that running leap on his own as soon as you turn your head...LOL. My baby boy decided it would be funny to do this while I was sitting there (as he is looking right at me laughing and getting closer to the edge of course with me telling him that he needs to sit on his bottom) and thank goodness I was because I caught him in mid air just as he jumped off! Padding is not a bad idea...we have a little spiderman couch that pulls out into a little nap pad (you know the ones) and we lay it sideways to soften the blow. Boys...strong willed, daring and adventurous!!! I don't remember ever having this much trouble with my daughter...LOL.

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I agree w/ the previous response. You just need to teach him that sofas (and chairs, and stools etc) are for sitting ONLY. He may not like the lesson, but don't think of it as punishment, it's for his own good.

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I guess my response is a little different. My 18 month old now has been taught to sit and turn over on his tummy to get down or sit and slide off his bottom onto the floor when he wants to get down off the couch. It took several times and us also working on the same thing being in the pool so he wouldn't fall in but he figured it out rather quickly. Persistence is the key.

He does sometimes want to stand and crawl up the back of the couch. I make him sit down and then have him get down off the couch all together. He's figuring it out. Consistent and repetitive talking may be key.

Good luck I know how crazy it can be.

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My son was an early walker and climber. I bought a small little tikes slide and put it inside the house. I redirected him to the slide each time he was climbing on something inappropriate. Hope this helps.

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Hi J.. I have been a daycare provider for 30 years. I have always considered my sofa as a sitting place only. If the children can not respect the sofa as for sitting only, they are not allowed on it. Consider it a no zone. Good luck and enjoy the years. They fly by so fast.

L.

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When your kids want to do something dangerous like that, and you know you can't stop them, the best thing to do is to show them how to do it safely. Every time he stands up, say "no" and physically sit him down. Then show him by example a few times how to crawl down on his belly, feet first. He'll be amazed that you're doing this, I'm sure, and he'll immitate you. You will have shown him a new skill which he will practice and he'll probably drop the walking on the couch bit (at least for a while).

It makes no sense to him (or you) to punish him for accomplishing something so cool. I know you don't want to do that, anyway. Just consistantly stop him every single time he starts to stand on the couch and he'll catch on. He wants your approval. If you are consistant with this, the lesson of minding his momma will spill into other aspects of his life.

Good luck and congrats on having a healthy, active little man!

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unless you want to drive yourself crazy staying right behind him, do what we do with our 13 month old. Just remove or back up the things around the couch. If you have carpet then he won't get hurt too bad. I'm not saying to let him go at it without supervision but he'll learn very quickly what causes pain. our 13 month old girl will get right on the edge of the couch or bed and look down (while on her tummy) but she learned after a couple of falls what causes it. good luck.

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It's not punishment teaching him that chairs are only for sitting, not standing and walking. Yes, climbing is a major milestone in a child's development. And, yes, bumps, scrapes, bruises, etc. are all a part of life. Just keep on him. When he climbs up congratulate him. If he tries to stand up and/or walk around scold him and sit him down.

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Every time he stands up on the sofa, tell him to sit down. And discipline him when he disobeys you, each time you catch him.

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Hi - Reading the responses here. I'm sorry, you can TRY and teach him about sitting now, but he's WAY to young to understand in a way that will guarantee that he won't hurt himself. He will maybe start to understand that at 2 or 3, maybe you'll even be lucky and he'll start to get it now. But there's no way to teach him to not hurt himself at this age in a way that will insure success.

Solution? Be with and teach him when you can, but this is what playpens and such are for. It's great that you seem to be able to track him around the house most of the time, including his couch adventures. But if you're in the kitchen or otherwise occupied, the sofa is probably just one of many things you have to worry about now that he's mobile. The highchair is an option while you're in the kitchen. It's a big transition from a little boy who depends on you for mobility to a walker - teaching him how to do everything right will take time. So, keep teaching and in the meantime you have to take measures to insure his safety by restricting his movements when you're not 100% engaged. Of course, make sure your house is safe in general, but I don't know how you can shrink the couch until he's older:)

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Hi, J.

Sounds like you have a climber on your hands. The problem is the couch is not the proper place for climbing. So my suggestion would be to find a proper climbing place. A toddler gym out in the back yard perhaps and redirect his climbing to there.

It is not to early to let him know he is not being safe. Perhaps you could say something like: " The couch is not where climbing is allowed, Let's go climb outside where it is safe and you won't get hurt." He may not understand at 1st but you will be surprised how quickly with the same repeated phrase, he will learn. Explain how you would be upset if he got hurt as well as he. I would tell my kids:" It hurts mommy to see you be do (that) because it will hurt you and Mommy loves you."

This will also come into play with "there is a time and place for all behaviors" later in life.

If he is resistant, as most little ones can be. It is not to early to introduce the time out technique. But remember it is only 1 min. per year. And you must reinforce the reason why he is there. And never forget to tell them you love them.

In time you will have not only a safe child but a well behave on also. There younger you start with behavior modification the easier it will be in the teens.

I have 2 grown children that I really never had any major behavior problems with and seldom had to use the time out technique after the age of 5. I don't really remember using it all that much. Anyway, I once in awhile here them saying things to their friends like: "Don't you know that that is not the way to act here." or " Didn't your mom teach you better than that." It kind of let me know I did something right.

Enjoy these young years. They never seem to last long enough.

J. J.

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Definitely pad the floor cause he will do it whether you are there or not. Just a heads up, jumping off the couch can hurt him. My little brother jumped off the couch and landed on his arm and literally broke it. It was casted and all. I want to say he was two or about to turn two, but either way just to be safe put the cushions on the floor or purchase some and let him know that those are there for him to fall on IF he falls not to purposely land on. I would just hate for him to think you are encouraging him to jump. Wow, what a doozy of an issue! I am wondering how mine will be cause we have tile floor throughout the house and I have no carpeted areas to land on. Thanks for the heads up cause I will have to keep this in the back of my mind now to prepare:)

I see nothing wrong with a stirn voice or punishing him. When we punish our chrilden its to let them keep out of trouble this includes learning to keep themselves safe too! Good luck.

I always used the words "uh oh" and "ouch" with my kids. That way they knew when they were in danger. Show him that falling off the couch is an ouch so he will understand what the big deal is and why you get all worked up about it. He may just think your reaction is funny and wants to see more of it. Good luck.

We had the same problem and still do occasionally with our 22 month old daughter. You just have to keep telling him the same phrase over and over and taking him off the couch when he doesn't obey. Also, making sure he has other things or places he can safely climb. (Memorial City mall I think, has a huge climbing ship or something in it that is supposed to be awesome.) This type of child has a NEED to climb, just like we have a need to eat. It must be done for him to be balanced, just make sure you make rules and he follows them. I would either put my daughter in time-out or tell her if she didn't sit on her bottom, she'd have to get down. Then if she didn't by the time I counted to three, I'd take her off. That usually worked, but it is still an ongoing process. Of course, your own style of discipline would prevail.

I would suggest gating off the area or finding things to do for him with you in the kitchen. The other option is, if possible, a convex mirror so that you could see him from the kitchen and correct him.

His safety is definitely more important than his accomplishment. He could get a concussion or a broken limb or neck - VERY possible. My other 4 year old daughter fell out of her chair last week doing nothing, but wiggling....she just happened to be wearing slippery clothing and I hadn't thought about it. SCARY to have your child hurt, for sure.

My friend's daughter was jumping on the couch, after being told not to, and fell off and broker her arm.

Just keep in mind that it CAN happen and it's your main job to protect against dangers.

Good luck!

Hi J.,,,,,
we all learn new things ,,,,but one of the first is NO so that is all you can do is sit there tell him no walking onsofa if he does sit him down say no sit on sofa not walk

good lucl L.

Give him something new. A large cardboard box, can be climbed in and out of. And if strong enough can be climbed onto. Make it into a fort of sorts for him. But you will indeed need to stay with him and the couch. That can cause a problem. Good luck. Be sure and take those pictures to share with family and friends later even him. Good luck.

J. B,
I had one of those. I use to move the coffee table and put all kinds of pillows around the front of the couch. I would also give him a little pat on the bottom when he did it and ordered him to sit dowen with a real mean face! This he would only laugh at ~ so try the pillows!
Good luck!
D.

We love our children, however, we must set boundaries. Don't feel as if you are punishing him for learning to climb onto the sofa. However, he has to understand that sofas, tables, etc. are for sitting, etc. not climbing or walking on, because he can get hurt. Just be firm and tell him "NO" when he begins to walk on the sofa. He has to know that you mean business when you tell him no.

Hello J.,

I am a SAHM of a 22 mo old. Your concerns have just shifted from infant care to toddler care. This is a phase that your son is going through. I was the same way with my son. When he would climb on the couch, I would go sit on the couch and when he started to get up and jump on the couch, I would emphasize to him that a couch is for sitting, not jumping. It took a while, but it got where if I were there on the couch with him, he would only stand up or walk from end to end. Not to say he didn't jump and had his spills, but I continued to instill in him that the couch was not for jumping. My son used to throw the back cushions of the couch, so he had some protection when he tumbled off. Once he figured out that it hurt when he fell off the couch, he was more careful. I also worked with him on how to get off the cough without just stepping off. I would sit him on the edge of the couch and at one of the ends of the couch so he could use the arm rest to hold on to as he scooted off the couch. I also taught him to roll over on his tummy and scoot off the couch, but he used the first method the most. It's all a time issue. He will learn to sit and scoot off the couch in no time, with your assistance. When you are not on the couch with him and he begins to stand up, make sure to tell him to sit down or tell him no jumping allowed, so that he will start to understand regardless if you are on the couch with him or away, the couch is not for jumping. I hope this helps.

God Bless,
E.

We have always taught our son, now 2 1/2, "Bobo's on the couch." He adapted very quick without any problems. I have also learned that being detailed in telling him to not do something gets better results than "No."

Best wishes. You're at a hair-raising point. The safer the environment, the better your nerves will be.