My Teen and Tampons...

if she really thinks it will be more convenient to use tampons (especially if she goes swimming with her friends often) then you should let her use them.

personally as a young teen when i tried using tampons i had a horrible experience (i wont explain for fear it may be tmi) my mother never taught us or talked about things like that. so i still to this day only use tampons in emergency situations!

also, if you baby her too much and dont let her grow up in her own time, then she may never really grown up. my mother babied all of her kids. my older sis didnt move out until she was 23, my bro didnt move out till he was 25 and my little sis is 20 and has no job and is living at home with no ambition, no respect, and no future plans to leave home what-so-ever.

i wouldnt be saying this if i didnt see it happen (and how it happened) with my own eyes.

good luck with your girl! and remember she will always be your little girl no matter how old (or grown up) she gets!!

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Hi,
Let her use them! I remember being her age and because I liked sports and hated "being on the rag" as the girls in my school called it...not being able to swim during swimming class... My mom finally got them and it was such a wonderful thing because then I was less self consciences because I was not drawing attention to myself during gym class and around boys. They didn't know I was on the "rag" anymore. I hope that helps. Plus, don't forget that pads make noise. Maybe others can't hear it but she can! She needs all the help she can get going through this puberty thing and also this ackward age. 13 and 14 yrs are pretty hard.
Audra

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Teen girls having open communication with their moms, being comfortable in their bodies, and having knowledge of their own bodies makes it less likely that she will do any of the things we moms really worry about for our teen daughters.

I'd encourage you to explore on your own what it is that you are uncomfortable and fearful about with her moving toward tampon usage. Do some reading up on your own concerns.

Then, together, learn what you need to for your daughter to begin using tampons. They really do make so many things easier when they are used correctly.

If you are not comfortable, find a local Nurse Midwife to meet with both of you to help your daughter learn about her wonderfully created body and learn how to use tampons. Midwifes are often covered by insurance for "well-woman" visits. Even if you don't want or need a full Pap exam for your daughter, you can make an educational appt for you and your daughter to learn what you need to.

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You should let her use tampons. This is one power struggle not worth it, because tampons are now much more safe than they used to be. I also have a 13 year old, and she loves tampons, will never go back to pads. Especially during summmer, they can't swim at all if they are wearing pads, so they will miss out on fun things! (and exercise for that matter, which they really need as teens!)

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I would suggest a menstrual cup. I use the "Diva Cup". It has a money back guarantee and there is NO risk of Toxic Shock Syndrome. Once you get the hang of placement, it is very comfortable. You reuse it so there is less waste for our planet and it's MUCH more cost effective.

Just letting you know the option exists.

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Oh my, it's just a tampon. She's getting older and you can't hold her back just because YOU have apprehensions. It is your job to encourage her to grow and mature, not to hold her back. There are other scary areas where you can hold her back, but this isn't a battle you should pick. This is an instance where she could just as easily go behind you back and use them (at a friend's house) so why not be a friend and advisor and help her to learn about this. She will thank you.

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Hello M.! My name is E. and I am respoding to your question. I too have a teen girl interested in using tampons. I asked myself if she was responsible enough to handle this. My answer was " no". A 13 year old child does not have the cleanliness skills needed for this task. There is a syndrome your child can get if cleanliness is not adhered to properly. It is toxic shock syndrome. Please before you allow your child to use this product, make sure she is responsible enough to handle it. This is a serious sickness. Research it for yourself before making any decisions on this matter!

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Give her information (including some about toxic shock syndrome), several different brands, and reasons & solutions for discomfort after insertion.

Let her grow up with you by her side guiding her and helping her make informed decisions. It's about her not you. Let go.

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I remember getting my Mom's super tampons and trying to make it work, yikes!!! Thank goodness there are specially made sizes and brands for girls now. There is no way that she shouldn't be able to be successful with her preferred method of personal hygiene. Perhaps you should use pads for your next period and see how you like it? This is one of the times you can connect with her and teach her the beauty of being a female. have fun!! Beware she may be sort of embarrased. deb

Hi M.,
Is there any chance you could be relating this to growing up in other ways too? Thank goodness, it's prime time for boys to stay away from girls! They're really grossed out by it all. It's most likely she's interested because her friends use them. They've probably loaned her one or two and tell her why they're better.
I say, if she wants to try, let her. It really is as simple as personal prefrence. She may be sick of the mess of it all. Maybe let her try the slender size and see for herself. She may decide they're too uncomfortable. If not, then just know that it's what's best for her. Plus, if you ever run out...you can steal hers!
I remember my mom having a hard time with me switching and I think she felt I was growing up too fast and it's really a scary age for parents with girls. Trust her to make the right decision. I'm sure you raised her to do that!!

There is no reason your teen can't use tampons as long as she's educated about the (minor) risks and she's responsible enough to change them as required. However, I have been using menstrual cups (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Menstrual_cup) for YEARS and they are so much safer and more comfortable - and yes, a teen could use them. There are "reusable" cups and "disposable" cups, so explore the options. I use a brand called "Instead" (http://www.softcup.com/) - and they are disposable. Good luck.

M. - what's wrong with tampons? I don't understand why you're not allowing her to use them! They're so much cleaner than pads, more comfortable, and safe!

I used tampons as a teen, but more because I was in athletics. I think its fine and if I had a daughter (I have 2 boys) I would let her use them. I would just buy both and let her chose and find whats right for her. Of course tell her all the pros and cons of both. She shouldnt be limited just because of her age.

I started to use tampons at about 13 yrs old also and never had any problems. What my mom did with me was made me read the entire little "booklet" that comes inside a box of tampons that explains how to use them, the risks involved, etc. That way your daughter will know everything there is to know and she will use them more responsibly. Good luck! :)

Hi M.,
I'm not sure I understand why letting your daughter use tampons would be "letting go" of her? I would think walking her through the steps of using them properly would bring you closer together. I guess even now at 40 I've never understood the phobia around them. My dad had custody of my sister and me when we came to that point in our lives. He initially said no to tampons because there were unfounded rumors that they would affect a girl's virginity. When it came down to it I told him I was going to use them and I gave him the reasons. They were cleaner and I could participate in a lot more activities. If it makes her feel better during that time of the month I would say go for it. It may turn out that she doesn't like them and goes back to pads anyway. I would let her make the choice. (c:

I believe that since your daughter's request is reasonable, it is only fair that you allow her to do what she feels would make her most comfortable during her period. Personally, I hate pads and everything about them. I have only used them after giving birth to my children. I would suggest you buy her tampons from Trader Joes or another health conscious store where you can find unbleached,all cotton tampons. The other well-known brands have polyester, other chemicals, and bleach in their tampons. This is a much safer, healthier alternative:)

M.,

You are so right to let her use tampons! Pads are just yucky, even for our teenage daughters. And be grateful that she is even willing to come to you to ask. Many girls would have just gotten them other ways and used them behind your back. Reward her for being adult about the situation and take her to the store!
Good Luck!
H.

It's really a great thing that she talks to you about that kind of stuff...I personally, had a scary experience with tampons and didn't start using them until late teens.

But, really it's just easier. I'd say it's no biggie.

I was using tampons at her age. It was a must. During the school day, it's hard to fit in the time to swap out your pad often enough. This could lead to embarassing moments. Just be sure that you talk to her about using them. Stress how important it is for her to not leave it in too long. If she's going to go swimming, she should have some cleansing wipes to make sure no residual blood will appear in the water. Gross I know, but it was always a fear of mine. Hehe.

Hi M.,

I'm not sure what you are so nervous about--it's not like using tampons leads to sex or anything! :-) Even you say that you prefer tampons to pads--so if your daughter is ready to try them, why not? God bless the people who invented tampons!!! Think of all of the things we women can do now because of them that our mothers couldn't do--I only wish they could be used right away after you have a baby...

:-) D.
P.S. I got my period at 13--and only spent one period using only pads. How embarrassing to "sit out" of P.E. class because of that first time! I was a competitive swimmer, too, so thank goodness for tampons--otherwise, that would have been an impossible situation.

If she's having a period, she's old enough to use tampons. If she's uncomfortable or frustrated with using pads, why deny her the opportunity to try something that might make her feel better about her period? Using tampons doesn't make you older, or de-virginize you, or any of the other things that people pass around. They are simply an alternative method of dealing with a natural function. Some people are comfortable using them. Some people aren't. She won't know if she prefers them if she's not allowed the opportunity to try them. She will still be your little girl, no matter what protection she settles on. (:

Hi M.,
I started my period at about 13 and used pads the first month. Without even a basis for comparison I hated feeling diapered and that I was sitting in "icky" all day ;) When I told my mom that I started and wanted to use tampons she gave me the speech on TSS and all that good stuff and bought them for me and I read the instructions, figured it out and never looked back. My daughters on the other hand are a different story. I have 16 yr old twin girls who started at around 13 1/2. As soon as they started I had the talk and went out and bought as others have mentioned the junior or teen slender size. I put the box in their bathroom and told them to try it when they felt ready, that there are instructions in the box and I would help them with any questions. That same box is unopened under their sink! They think its icky to use tampons. Go figure. Both are athletic and ones on the swim team and water polo. I ask her how the heck she does it (that water polo suit is tight!) and she just says its her preference and it works out ok. After all that...guess what I am trying to say, I think you should let her choose. Starting her period is what marked the growing up milestone...not necessarily her method of protection. Good Luck to you and be thankful she wants to use them. I still have nasty wastebaskets in my teens bathroom to contend with once a month!

I celebrated each milestone with my daughter. When she started menstration, when she transitioned to tampons, everything. It was actually pretty funny "teaching" her to use a tampon. She is very activie and pads were not conducive to her athletic lifestyle. I remember when I was that age I thought you couldn't be a virgin and use a tampon! You need to ask yourself what your fears are. If you feel anxious, so will she. Talk to her, let her know what your fears are, listen to hers. You can really turn this into a "teachable" moment, and also use it to open the door to conversations about a whole list of things. Good luck!

I think if you tell her all that goes with using tampons she will be fine. I have 2 nieces that live close by( ages 12 1/2, 15) they both do fine with them. My daughter who is 11 doesn't really want to try them( I think they may help her, for hers is pretty bad already). It may make life a little nicer during that time. Good Luck.

I had my period at 13 years of age, I am now 37. The first day of my period I used a pad. I felt like I was wearing a diaper! I felt like everyone could see and hear that I had a pad on. I walked funny, and felt gross. I went home and told my mom about it, she gave me a Tampax tampon, cardboard without rounded edges, and told me to read the directions and go for it. I figured it out myself, and wore a tampon the 2nd day of my first period. I have never worn a pad since, unless I ran out of tampons, or needed a backup to my tampon in the night. I can't imagine going a year.

I absolutely think it's okay for your daughter to use a tampon. When a friend of mine started her period for the first time she didn't even tell her mom, she just took one of her tampons and started using them on her own. Your daughter might be using her friends already or ones from machines. It is awkward enough to be a teen and when you wear a pad it feel like everyone knows and that can be really hard. I understand where you are coming from but i think she'll be fine, and probably a lot more comfortable.

You seem reluctant to address this issue with her. I don't know if it is because you are uncomfortable with her growing up or what. I would schedule an appt. with a gynecologist to have them give her a pelvic exam and talk with her about that and other issues you may have, since you are reluctant.

Best of luck.

Wow. I just went through that with my 14 year old just last month! She wanted to start using tampons so she could go swimming, so I got her all sizes and brands. The first try it was a no go. The second month she tried it she used the slim Tampax and a lot of KY jelly and she said she felt a little pop and it slid right in.
So now she thinks she has lost her virginity!
Anyway, let her use them. But get her to go in the bathtub so she has plenty of room and privacy to work it in. so to speak.
Good luck!

I would definately let her do it. I had to use them out of necessity at a Girl Scout event. Had to try for 1/2 hour with girlfriends coaching in a public place. I feel it's better for her if she learns at home, then can decide for herself which she would use.

I have two girls and a boy. My oldest is 10. However, I have discussed the topic with with several friends because it's hard for me to remember how old I was. What I do remember..."Why didn't I do this sooner??????" Pads smell, pubic hairs stick to them, you leak and they are uncomfortable. The day my child asks to use tampons is the day I will help her out with it. Summers and swimming...not worrying about the HUGE pad being seen...Go for it!!! Just make sure she changes it and wears a panty liner in case she forgets to change it.

I would first educate her on Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS) so she knows warning signs to look for if a problem were to occur. Tampons need to be changed frequently to prevent problems with TSS and as a teenager it is easy to lose track of things (out of sight, out of mind). I hate pads and can empathize with your daughter's request...plus it's easier to carry around tampons than pads.

I let mine use them. It's a pain especially if they're in sports.

S.

I don't think it is too young. I was in cheerleading at that age and always used them when I was wearing my uniform because I was afraid of a not so cool moment. Since I was the smallest girl I was always the one to be tossed up in the air. You can imagine all the potential embarrassing moments there. I know for me it didn't make me feel any different or more grown up. I just wasn't as parinoid of being uncool and feeling icky. Besides I'm 30 and my mother has no idea than she 'let go' and we have a wonderful relationship. Your little girl always stays your little girl and it sounds to me like you have a pretty good relationship. Good luck.

summer is comming-swimsuits, the beach... I say let the girl use tampons!

Totally fine! I started using them at that age. I hated pads and still do! If she is ready let her ware them. Just make sure she knows she has to change them often to prevent TSS. :)

Hi, M.,

I say let her use tampons. I'm not sure why you are hesitating to let her use them. You might read the instruction pamphlet that comes in the box of tampons with your daughter the first time she tries them.

Sincerely,
L. E

M., let her move on to teen-hood. Try the slenders that are out there for teens. My mom wouldn't let me use them either, until her gynocologist told her that was silly. She'll start buying them at school and using them even if you don't condone it. Best of luck!

I agree with the others regarding it being fine for her to use tampons as long as she understands how to use them correctly. Personally, I've discovered that I prefer pads but that's only because there are so many options available now with super thin, super absorbent, pads that keep you feeling dry and protected. If she does decide tampons aren't the way to go just make sure she understands what products are available to her so she isn't so frustrated.

Hi M.,
I started my period at 11 and did not use tampons until I was 15. Once I figured out how to use them I have not gone back. They are definitely cleaner, more discrete, and allowed me to do many activities that I would have been restricted from due to menstruation (such as swimming).
Please note that most stores now carry super slim tampons specifically for teens. Just be sure to emphasize to your daughter the importance of changing the tampon regularly throughout her period so she does not get toxic shock syndrome.

Go with your daughter, if she is ready, she's ready. If not, she will try it and decide to wait (prob till summer) and try again. Every girl is different. I thought I was ready right away but then decided it was gross - till I wanted to go surfing the next summer, but my sister NEVER got used to it and still doesn't use them today. So just let her decide, she'll know if she's ready. The main this is making sure she understands the responsibility on her part for proper usage. Toxic Shock Syndrome is real and has serious consequences, so make sure you are very clear on this aspect of usage. You prob already know this but.... don't get the cheap ones (not that all store brands are bad) but some do not stay together and it is serious safety issue.

LET GO MOM!!
It is perfectly ok to use tampons. There is a "slender junior" size available.
Just like you, she doesn't want to wear the smelly, bulky, uncomfortable pads. She probably doesn't want the pad to show thru her clothing and it makes her self conscious.
My daughter is now 16 and I remember feeling "weird"when she wanted to use a tampon. It was really tough for her to figure out how to use them And, even tougher for me to have to "instruct" her thru the bathroom door.yikes

why drive a volks wagon when you can have a limo.. is what I say .. kudos for the daughter I don't blame her.. a couple of months past I was out of the tampons had to use a pad and omg it was like walking with a 2x 4 between the legs, good for her for wanting to make the change, just remind her that she still needs to change them the smae amount of time she would change the pads, in the first few days even more then as she adjusts to them .. also remind her that she needs to change them after she goes number one or number 2, bacteria can get on the string, so even if she just changed the tampon and a few mins later she has to go # 1 change it again, the string still can get wet with the urine and to change it.

If I remember correctly, my mother did not allow me to use tampons and I used them anyway. At least she is consulting with you and that is the way you want to keep it. Doesn't mean you have to give in to everything, but it is quite nice when you are able to choose your battles.

I'm there with you my oldest just started,(11yrs old) and when they had there sex class i couldn't belive that they were telling how safe the tampons were for them, i just don't think that young girls should use them, i usderstand that the felling of a pad is somethims uncomfotable but it just think that its safer for them to use a pad over a tampon, they have they whole life to experence them and im sure that there friends are useing them and they feel left out,sorry i but i stand strong on no tampons till they have had sex.

I started using tampons when I was your daughters age. I was on swim team and you can't take a week off every month because of your period. I never had a problem with them. I have gotten so used to them that when I have had to use a pad (after the birth of my son and a few surgeries) I feel really yucky and unsanitary. Also, the risks that used to be associated with tampons isn't what it used to be.

I started off on the OB tampon when I started at 13. Its a bit messier, its a hell of a lot easier to learn to use (peel off the wrapper and insert) and has never leaked on me.

I hate pads just because they are uncomfortable. Like one of the other moms said you can find the junior sizes.

Age really has nothing to do with it - they make small ones just for teens. Its a personal comfort. The real issue is if she is not responsible enough to know to change it frequently enough to avoid infection (toxic shock)

You might be worring for nothing. My 13 year old has also had her period for a year, she tryed the playtex because they slide in much easier. She is ok with them in but states it hurts to take them out, so she doesn't use them for now. So let her try and decide for her self. She is in school and it might be much more convenient for her. And she might not even be able to get them in at all. Good luck! J.

Our first daughter used tampons from about your daughter's age and never had a problem. Our second daughter made several unsuccessful painful attempts, and we gave up. Different hymen. Depends on the girl. Our gynecologist says there's no problem with teens using tampons, it just depends on the girl. Our daughters are dancers, so wearing pads with a leotard can be a real problem. Our younger one just wears shorts over her leotard when it's that time of month. That's how they handle it.

If she's asking, I'd let her. Obviously she doesn't feel comfortable or clean or whatever with the pads. I used the pads (okay, I'm old...they were the HUGE pads with belts when I started my period) from my second cycle on. I was very active in athletics and the pads just didn't work for me. Today's pads are much thinner and narrower, but you still can't swim with them, sometimes they move (especially when exercising and you sweat 'down there'), and you always know it's there.

i started wearing tampons at about her age ,too, because i wanted to go swimming and stuff....i see nothing wrong with it....just please make sure that you educate her about toxic shock syndrome.....serious stuff there....make sure she understands the importance of frequent changes, and ask that she wear a pad at bed-time, or when she's at home doing nothing.(like THAT ever happens, lol)...good luck to both of you......

Wow. Just read all of the responses and there are some seriously repressed and uptight moms out there. I don't see how tampons are in any way sexual or encourage earlier sex, or compromise physical "virginity"! Come on ladies! Most girls have adequately explored their bodies by the time she gets her period. If your daughter wants to try tampons then by all means you should let her. When I got my first period at twelve my mom bought me slender tampons and pads. I had all of the instructions in the packages and I liked the tampons the best- my mom used tampons and they were more modern. I didn't want to wear a "diaper" and do the maxi pad waddle. I think dictating what type of feminine products your daughter uses sounds archaic and controlling. The comment about using the bathtub to insert a tampon just sounds completely bizarre. Read the pamphlet that comes in the box. We are raising young women here, not sheep.

My mom showed me how to use tampons with my second period when I was 12. I'm very thankful she did. Teach her how and explain things to her.

I started using them when I was eleven. I had very heavy periods and I wanted to go swimming. My mom is a doctor so maybe that is why it was not a big deal to her. I have never used pads since. Yuck.

After my OB told me it was fine I came to the conclusion that my very athletic 13 year old daughter could choose whatever she wanted- tampons or pads. I think you're making the right choice. Life is stressful enough for our kids without making it worse. Just make sure that she knows about toxic shock and how to properly dispose of them.

I know how hard it is to see our girls getting older but it's the natural order. Good luck.

Hello M.. I say let her do it. As you stated, wearing pads can make a girl feel so "unclean". I have always hated pads. Both my daughter and I use tampons and are very satisfied with them. No more pad lines, no more leaks, and no more embarrassing anything. LOL I am all for it. I tried to get my daughter to use them initially, but she wasn't interested. Once she became sexually active, things changed, and she actually came to me and asked if I could buy her some and explain to her how they work, etc..

Hi M.. Please let her. I used to sneak them because my mom didn't allow them and I relied on what my friends taught me. It's so much more important that she is educated from you about how often to change them and to remember to change them and remove the last one. If she is sneaking them she might find it more difficult to do that. I personally can't stand pads so I can understand her frustration with pads. My daughter is only 9 so we are not there yet, but she is on a swim team and I know that the time will come that she will need to use tampons. I'm ok with it, just not at the very beginning of her adjusting to having a cycle. Good luck with your decision.

Hi M.,
I started with tampons after my 2nd period when I was 12 1/2 (33 years ago when tampons weren't that great). It made me feel more comfortable because the pads were about 4 inches thick back then. Pads our much better now.

That being said, I think tampons are fine for your daughter. She'll appreciate it if you let her have some control over this issue. She needs to know that she has to change them regularly. Use the tampons with no fragrance so she doesn't get any irritations. I prefer Playtex because the plastic is easier to use than the cardboard. She may try them and hate them but at least she'll have the option.

Good luck, hope this helps.

Totally safe and they make them for teens now, too. When my daughter starts her cycle, I'll encourage her to use them because I remember having to use pads for the longest time and having leak issues at school and as a young teen, that is SO EMBARRASSING! She may be growing up but she still needs you, moving from the physical need to the emotional/psychological needs.