My Son Is Turning 2 - Converse,TX

At 2 yrs your little one would have fun at a party. Then it will be over and so will his memory of it. He may talk of it for a bit, but children usually live in the moment. They quickly forget 'this morning' or 'yesterday'. If you don't have a party that will go unnoticed. With 8 children, we found that 4, 5, or 6 were the best years for a party. You have much on your plate and need all your strength to get from day to day. The time you spend one-on-one with each of your children will be more precious and valuable than anything else could ever be.
Hang in there. You sound like a great, caring mother. God bless your family.
JK

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Parties are only as important as you make them. The health and wellness of a family comes first and you shouldn't feel guilty about that. Your son will have many future opportunities for birthday celebrations that he will remember. At two years of age, they are not aware of having a party or not unless you make a big deal out of them. I would recommend letting him choose a special activity or treat that will make the day significant and special to him in honor of his birthday.

Happy Birthday to your little guy!

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Yep, keep it simple. Conserve YOUR energy.
His favorite restaurnat, or out for ice cream...or have nearby family members come over for dinner and cake.
Keep it very simple.
Make him feel special, but put your efforts into parties for 8, 9, 10 yrs.... the ones they will remember.

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Take the time to have a party for your 2 year old, even if it's just a small one with immediate family. Like you said he only turns 2 once and I know none of us ever want our kids to think one is more important than the other. He may be missing the attention he use to get before the baby and this may help let him know he is still just as important and loved just as much.

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How about having a small family party - your child will only turn 2 once in his life and you have all been focusing on the new little one... Make your 2 year olds BDay ALL ABOUT HIM. Do fun things with the number 2 - get 2 videos that he likes, let him have 2 (small) pieces of cake, go to the zoo and ride the train twice.... you don't have to have a huge party to celebrate your child turning 2 - but if you have a big family day that is all about him.... he will notice and that is what you really want for your BDay is for people to love on you!

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Hi there,

First of all, let me say I am so glad to hear your little one is doing well!

As far as the party goes, you definitely should have one. I am sure that you have been very busy over the last three months and have been pre-occupied with you baby in the NICU. This is something that you can do special for your other little one. I am sure it would mean the world to him.

I don't know why people wouldn't want you to have a party. I am sure you need a little break anyways. It will be a fun time for you and your other children. Even if it is something small, it is the thought that counts. Your son will appreciate it!

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Fortunately, a 2 year old won't fret too much over a party. Something, anything to show him he's special, if you opt not to do a party. Ever since my son was about that age, I have woke him with a little cupcake with a candle whether he had a party or not. See, his birthday is on December 17th. Tricky, in itself because that's when everyone takes off for Christmas vacation. So it's our "little thing". A few family members, even at the house for an hour or so, just to let him know we're all blessed by his presence in this world! I don't know if it helps but I understand how you feel...

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I completely agree with the other posters who said, "Do what you can do." He is only 2 and he will NOT be aware of 'missing out'. Sure, make it a special day for him, but like someone else said, a special day for a 2-year-old is a few balloons and cake/ice cream. You know what he likes; get him one something special and then make a big deal about the day in your family. I have no idea where we've gotten this idea in our society right now that every child must have a birthday party every year or you're a neglectful mommy. !! I'm having a little girl in a few weeks and my older daughter is NOT getting a huge third birthday party in May. Depending on how our family is doing, she MIGHT get a few friends over! But even at three she'll have no idea! Even for older kids, it is a good idea to teach them that we don't 'expect' privileges like birthday parties. We are here to make them feel special and loved in many other, more effective, ways.

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Have the party! My son was born 23 weeks early and suffered from kidney problems all his life. My daughter was born a year and a half later. All his life (he passed away in 2001 just before turning 14) he had medical problems and was in and out of the hospital constantly. My daughter would stay with family every time I had to be at the hospital with my son and I thought she would be okay. However, now that she is twenty years old I am finding out how neglected she felt. She loved her brother very much and she knew that I loved her very much and now as an adult she understands why I did the things I did, but as a child there were many years that she felt that I loved her brother more than I loved her. She now understands that I loved them equally but at the time she really felt hurt. A child does not have the mental capacity to understand many things, as a child all you need is to feel loved. Have the party!

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Take it from a Mom that way over did it with parties. If I had to do it over again I would keep it simple! The party is for you. The child wants you and a few friends at the park and some special cookies and some bubbles to blow. Take pictures and enjoy the moment.

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I would do as much or as little as you want. I mean he is only 2, it isn't like he will remember his party (or lack thereof). Kids don't need a lot of stuff to be happy either.

You could have a small party, maybe just his parents and sister singing happy birthday after dinner with some cake for dessert. Or just head for the park on Saturday for some outdoor fun and cupcakes. It sounds like you have a lot going on right now, I wouldn't stress over a big party.

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My almost 2 YO doesn't even know what a birthday is. Having had 3 in the NICU for an extended period, I know how tiring and stressful everything is right now. I had a babyshower when my first was in the NICU and I just wanted everyone to go home! I was pooped.

My suggestion- get a helium balloon and a cake and take a picture and sing the song and stick it in the scrapbook- he'll never know the difference!

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The wonderful thing about turning 2 is they don't get it as far as when. So wait until the baby is home and life isn't as stressful and then have a party. Something small but fun.

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One suggestion I have is to have a family day (at least an hour or two) at a local park. Pack a simple picnic of sandwiches, chips, fruit or whatever you can make that wouldn't be any more work than if you were making lunch at home or even stop and get something at a fast food restaurant. Order some cupcakes (so you don't have to worry about plates and forks), get a couple of helium balloons with weights, and pack your camera. If you have friends or family that just have to share in the day, then tell them what your plans are and ask them to join you but to bring their own lunch (anyone close enough to know what you are dealing with should not be offended by having to pack their own lunch).

The fresh air and time spent together will do everyone some good and it is an easy way to make your little boy feel very special.

My oldest was a preemie and she turned 15 yesterday. While she was in the hospital it seemed as though we were on an emotional roller coaster ride and looking back, I think a couple of hours at a park just enjoying the fresh air and sunshine would have done both my husband and myself a world of good.

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Everyone deserves a party. It doesn't have to be big. It can just be the people who live in your house. You can make him Prince for the day. Let him pick the menu for the day or if he can verbally communicate with you, ask him what he would like to do that would make him feel special. If his communication is limited, give him some choices and he can pick. Since your littlest one is in the hospital, maybe you and your hubby can take shifts. One of you can spend the morning doing something special with him and then the other in the afternoon. I agree with you. You only turn 2 once. God bless you and I will pray for your baby girl and your family!

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I say just have something small for your family and maybe your son's favorite friend. He won't remember it for long, so it doesn't have to be super special! Just playing with a bunch of balloons and eating cake would probably be exciting enough for him =) (this is what we did when my first daughter turned 2...I was about to pop any day with my 2nd daughter so we didn't want to plan anything big!) Just decorate with streamers, wear party hats and have noisemakers, and blow up a whole bag of small balloons and let him eat as much cake as he wants =)
PS hope your baby gets out of the NICU soon!

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Take the easy route - think of what your 2 yr old wants and not what YOU want for him. YOU may want a party with all his friends, he may care less. I know my 2 yr old didn't want the excitement, having to share his new toys, having his routine interrupted, etc. So I asked him what he wanted. He wanted cake, ice cream, to play in his pool, and to go to the zoo. So we made it a "birthday weekend" and did all of that. He had a blast! Plus no fuss on our part and it was almost free.

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I would say to follow your instincts. You defintely have to do something with your two year old so he will know how special he is to you too. Congratulations on getting to the point where your little family is thriving. I know that can take alot of stress and wear and tear on you. We as mothers have to think everything through not just for ourselves but for our children as well. Maybe you can string his day out by doing special things with him. I've always liked to do BD party's for my kids. My dad and I just had the biggest rippit because he said kids are to spoiled now a days and they don't need a BD party every year. I just had my daughter's 5th and I am going to have Party's for my two older boy's this next month. So I guess what I am trying to say is do what you think is right. Your the mom. You know what is best for your kiddo's. You don't have to have a large party it can be whatever or however you think it should be. I wish I could give you a big encouraging hug. Good Luck and Prayers to you!

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Hi L. I can totally sympathize with you. I am a mother of six one of which was born at 24 wks. While I wanted to spend every minute by his side i had to take care of my other children. I didnt however have to worry about someone elses birthday while he was in the NICU but if i did I would have still thrown a party I mean while he is only turning two he cant be left out. If you apprehensive about it than just have a small party and Im sure that any guest you might invite will know your situation and be understanding.
Im very glad to hear that she is thriving, that is totally awesome. Keep doing what your doing and always keep praying.
And just a little fwi my preemie will be four in two months and is doing awesome, he has done everything they told me he wouldnt and he is bilingual. Dont ever let yourself get discouraged as hard as that may be lol.
God bless and good luck. Ill be praying for yall.

I would say definitely have a party...he needs to be in the spotlight on his big day. Even if you have a small party with just a few friends and family memebers, he will still enjoy it I'm sure. Birthdays are a HUGE deal in my family because everyone gets to feel special on their special day. :)

I hope that things continue to go well with the baby.

Hi L.,
Have three sons, ages 25, 24 and 21 so been there, done that with the b-day parties. I learned parties for toddlers are done for the parents more than they are for the kids because the 2 year old won't remember a day of his party as he ages. (I know my sons don't even remember the party favors given, let alone the entire b-day party when they were two.) You definitely, however, need to note his special day. You have alot on your plate at the moment so I would advise just keeping it simple. Small group of family and friends at home, bbq if you want and a cake. You will still come away with lots of wonderful pictures and his day is celebrated. Your sanity will thank you for taking this route as well.

You are absolutely right! You only turn 2 once. I think you should have a party for your son. It could just be a small family get together with a cake and some balloons. I think the 4-year-old will appreciate the fun as well! I am so glad your baby girl is thriving! Good luck with everything.

I own Party Station in Schertz. We offer private parties here on evenings and weekends. Everything here is very age appropriate for him. If you are interested, my website is www.mypartystation.com.
Good luck to you :)
C.

I had a baby also in the nicu when my oldest turned 2. I was blessed with a home coming of my baby before the party. I kept it VERY simple. I had cake and ice cream and I think the grandparents over for it is all. I learned quickly to tame down the parties down and keep them simple. He had so much fun and I took pictures of him and the cake for him to look at when he got older.

I think he was into tractors that year so I made a tractor cake to make it a little more special.

Good luck I know it is all over whelming at times.

J.

I say yes you have the party.. you have to make the other kids feel special and loved.. ecspecially with a new baby... you don't have to do anything huge.. just do a small gathering at your house with some relatives..

My son just turned 2 a few weekends ago. We went to breakfast together, then to the park. The next day we had a family dinner and presents.

I would suggest making it about him, but is now the right time to have a party with your little one in the hospital?

Have a small party to celebrate. Don't overdue it for your sake and your family's. You are right, you have 2 other children, but your entire family feels the stresses of mommy. Keep it simple for everyone and you will have a great memory that will last forever.

I never gave my children a party(other than just immediate family)..till they actually asked for a party..... My oldest was 5 when she wanted friends at her party.....my middle child never wanted anyone but family.. and my son wanted one at 2 or 3.........and then never wanted another... because he didn't like the other kids trying to unwrap his presents.

J.

I may be out in left field here but if I am I apologize. Birthdays are for celebrating the special gift of life and they are also about making memories. Your 2 year old won't remember his birthday, but you want to make happy memories. So have a small family type gathering. Celebrate and take pictures. Don't have a big bash because he won't care-all he'll know is he's getting extra attention and extra time. Once your little preemie comes home your attention will be focused on her-by necessity many times. So you will need to be extra careful that each of your precious children know they are loved for who they are equally. Does that make sense? So don't ignore the birthday but don't get too carried away either. And I'm so excited that your preemie is thriving-I have an adopted preemie who was 27 weeks-and I think God every day for all of His miracles and medical advances! I'll keep you all in my prayers!

You could maybe have a family party at somewhere fun like GattiTown or his favorite restaurant. That way you don't have to do much preparation, as it sounds like you already have a lot on your plate. You could then have some little party favors for everyone in your family, including the baby. After the party everyone could take the baby's party favor to the hospital, so that the entire family has helped celebrate with your 2 year old son. Your 2 year old son may then think that even his tiny sister is excited about his birthday and wants to see him on his special day. Just a thought. Don't stress out too much, though. It's fun to celebrate the 2 yr old birthday, but he will likely not remember the details and just having any type of party with his family will mean the world to him.

This calls for a family celebration. We had just moved when our second child turned two. What seemed right was to celebrate as a family and that is what we did. We just made our evening meal a time of celebration, had a little cake, etc. and the four of us had a good time. A little earlier in the day, we had taken both our boys to the Kiddie Rides. We took pictures. Lots of smiles.

Hi,
If you want a party for your little boy you should have one. Who is anyone else to tell you what to do. I seriously doubt that you are neglecting your baby in the NICU. And if the baby is doing well, then that's one more reason to celebrate. You know what's best for ALL your babies.

Well L., my take on this is completely different from everyone elses. He is only turning 2 once, but he doesn't know that at 2. Don't buy into the guilt thing that he has to have a party. A party for a 2 yr old is cake, icecream and a balloon (buy 3 so that the 4 yr old has one and one will break). They do pick up on Mom's stress level and I imagine having 3 little ones is stress enough, even without the NICU trip. So chill, stop at the supermarket, get the decorated cupcakes, 3 balloons and a pint of ice cream. Choose a weekend day that Dad is home to help and sing songs, play ring around the rosy, London bridges etc. and take pictures. That is all the party that a 2 yr old can absorb.
We had big production parties some years and some years due to illness low key affairs, no one was marked for life. They all turned out fine.
A 2 yr old will not miss what he never had, there is plenty of time later to do parties. BTW, my rule on that is only number of kids as you are old. 3 for the 3 yr old and 4 for the 4 yr old. Then the party can be kid centric and not a movie production for the adults. I hope this helps. I think you are doing great just to be able to think about it. Hope the baby is home soon.

Don't stress over a huge production for a 2 year old. Keep it small and simple with just family and maybe a couple of close friends: cake, ice cream, and presents. Just let it be like a "play date" and let the kids play.

A 2 year old will barely remember the party anyway.

A simple gathering of family or closest friends would work. At two, just showing you remembered his birthday, making him feel special is all it will take. There are other significant milestones to come, and it sounds like you really dont need the stress of a big to-do. Have fun but make sure you can relax and enjoy it also! Happy Birthday to your son!

I remember those days!! I have an idea that i thought I would just pass on...if you want to celebrate his birthday but are just a bit overwhelmed, how about a Birthday Party in a Box...get a small cake..or cup cake, a party hat, blower, juice/or no juice and put it in a box wrapped/umwrapped and he has his own instant little party. Its different and children at that age love to discover whats in a box. You could even make it enough just for the immediate family. Since he is 2 he wont remember any effort that was put into it, plus it is a cute presentation.

Just a quick idea...hope it helps

Hi L.,
It's really up to you to have a party for your 2 yr. old.Don't let people influence you.Sure 2 only comes once just like 3,4 ,5 and so on. You have ALOT on your plate right now,Anyhow what person can remember their 2nd birthday party.You can still make it special at home w/your husband and little girl and son.After lunch or dinner bake or buy a small cake sing happy b-day and let him dig in while you take memorable pictures and you guys eat the rest. B-Day parties i feel at that age is mostly to feed the adults. Im sure your husband will be in agreence w/ you and if he wants to throw the party let him plan and host it, because it doesn't sound like your not to sure if you want to do ALL the work.Don't STRESS it.

Quite frankly the only way the 2 year old will remember the day is with a picture. Buy some muffins for breakfast stick a candle in it and sing happy birthday with your husband and children. Take a picture and put it in a frame or album (or on the computer if you have a digital camera.) Hug your child and spend a little extra time that day reading, rocking and playing with your 2 year old. You are probably spending quite a bit of time at the hospital and the last thing a two year old in this situation needs is a mom to spend her precious time organizing a big birthday party that he won't remember any way. If grandparents are nearby let them stop by...but please don't mess with the trappings of a party. There are plenty of ways to make the day special without doing the party thing. (My neighbor has three children and the kids celebrate a family birthday most years, but each child gets a friend birthday party once every three years (that way she only plans one big birthday a year) Her three year old had a theme birthday this year for the first time. Still too young to have many memories of the day, but they'll have pictures. Mommy guilt tells us that we have to have a blow out day for it to be special for the birthday boy, but really at this age things that are stressless for you and the child are the best. Happy day to you!

I say celebrate it, maybe at a place like Chuck E Cheese where everything is done for you to take the planning and stress off, but not the fun for your son, or a bounce house place Pump it Up (more pricey) they also do everything for you so the party is easy and no home cleanup. Each one of your children deserve that special birthday celebration, and with your youngest daughter in NICU go with the most fun, but easiest on you this year. Your 4yr old will love her brothers event too.

I'm not sure if someone else has already responded with this, but the general rule is to keep the number of children to whatever the age of the child is. So, with a two year old, you would have two of his little friends at the party. Then you could invite your family and maybe very close friends. For my youngest's 2nd birthday, we invited our next door neighbors (who have 3 little girls, as we do, with their youngest being my youngest's age), another family with three girls whose 2 oldest children are the same age as my 2 oldest, my parents, and my husband's sister and her grown children. We barbequed, had a pinata in the backyard, my daughter opened her presents, and we ate birthday cake. It was very simple and low-key, we didn't spend a ton of money, and the birthday girl was as happy as she could be! It was a nice time for the family to get together. I think if you want to do something for him keep it simple and small and you will be fine. Prayers for your little preemie! :-)

I would celebrate his bday with immediate family. Then when your new baby comes home (and when you are comfortable with a lot of visitors around), throw a joint happy 2nd bday and come meet the new baby party!
I hope your baby gets stronger each day and will join ya'll at home soon.

Purchase some kites, take a simple picnic with some cupcakes, go to a park, instant party! Just invite a few friends!

Have the party, maybe not a huge affair, but just something. In the grand scheme of things, your 2 yo may not remember not having a 2nd birthday party all of his life. But, you are going to remember it. And, being that you already feel guilty, you will continue to carry that guilt with you. Besides, it will be a great break from the stress of the little one in NICU. Not that she should be forgotten about, I'm not saying that. But, a small gathering for a couple of hours will be plenty. Cake, ice cream, playing, and presents. Have it somewhere so you don't have to worry about clean up house before or after.

With your other baby in the NICU I can definately see how hard it is to concentrate on anything, but I think you should have the party. It's your baby's special day. You don't have to do anyhting elaborate, but if you don't do anything then your baby will feel like they've missed their "special" day.

my heart goes out to you, my daughter was in the Nicu, and my son was 17 months and it was the most stressfull time ever, and it was only for 11 days. I know you have so much on your plate right now and he really is too young to know the difference so if you don't have the energy to throw a party don't feel guilty about it. How about chuckecheese? I mean just you and dad bring both the kids, you can buy a little cake there and bring him a present. He'll have so much fun, you won't have to plan a party, and it'll probably cost you less than $35 if you go online and get a coupon.

The best rule is the same number of guests as the age of the child. Have 2 other children his age over, do cake and ice cream, play for half an hour, and then its over. 2 year olds don't need more, and you certainly don't need big party stress. If he has a favorite cartoon character, get plates and napkins to match. That's it. I hope everything goes well with your little one in the NICU.

Morning L.;
Did you give a party for your daughter when she turned 3?
If so, your son will remember that, so, then it is important
that you do the same for him!
It is a special day, a child's birthday, what the heck it is
a special day even for 72 year olds like me!!
Even if it's just a cake and a couple of presents, that makes it special!
Have Fun, Enjoy Life>>>it is short!
B. C.

Can anyone help you out? I know that you will want to have had a party for your little man, but I don't know if you have the energy to pull it all off. Do you have anyone you know that can make a nice cake for him? I always make box cakes, stick them in the freezer overnight and ice them the morning before the event and they come out awesome. Seriously, people always want to know the secret to my yummy cakes, and they are so easy!! So maybe your mom, or a good friend could make a cake, and you could just put up some streamers and balloons and have a low key family and really close friends party. Or just pick up a cake at walmart, they are good too. I would say with all that is on your plate, asking for help is totally appropriate and most likely those close to you would love to know there was something they could do for you right now. If you don't have anyone you feel comfortable asking, then I think just keeping it really low key is the way to go. Best wishes and I am so glad to her your youngest is doing well:)

there is a time and place for everything. its time to have a party. keep it simple. just go for happy birthday theme this year. i think you need a time to be happy for a day. i cannot understand why others would tell you not to. i could see myself not being in the mood to have one. say a special prayer that day for your little baby. God blesss your baby girl and family.

Your baby is in good care, you are right you child will only turn 2 one time make it his day. If he has a favorite toy or game use that as a party theme even the cake. Take lots of pictures for later he will love it and so will the kids. Think good thoughts been there with my little one also.

Of course you h ave a party, and take pictures. The rule of thumb is one guest per year of age. If he has two little friends he plays with, invite them, otherwise, just have family. At two he is still a baby, but YOU need to celebrate HIS DAY. Get him a toy he really wants and take pictures for him to see later on It won't matter that it wasn't a big blow-out.

Have a small family party..something simple, cheap and easy! All bdays are special..celebrate it but don't stress over it or go all out......too many gifts are overwhelming for a 2 yr old so don't have a ton of kids..we usually just do nieces and nephews..enjoy;-) Cupcakes are fun and easy too for kids to eat..they make cupcake CAKES at Walmart..good luck! ;-)

L.,

I would suggest that on the morning of his birthday party you and your husband take the two older children to the NICU and explain to your son that it is so his little sister can wish him a happy birthday--that way he knows it is still his big day but he also gets to include his baby sister and you get to see her as well. Since it's possible that the NICU won't allow your older children in the room, then you and your husband can take turns seeing her and the kids can send a message to each other through the two of you.

As for the party, that is what friends and family are for. Recruit them to set the party up while you are at the hospital and then when you and the family return your son will be delighted to see that his birthday party, along with friends and family, are waiting there just for him. It doesn't have to be a large party, just something to show him that it's his big day. To include your eldest daughter, ask her what she thinks would be a good idea for the party and implement it (if possible) so that she is involved as well. A good gift from his little sister could be a framed picture of her for him to keep of his very own (also one from the big sis as well so she doesn't feel left out).

I hope this helps. I will pray for your daughter and family and hope the birthday turns out well!