I have a three year old son. He's very smart and very sensitive for his age. And quite dramatic.
My family went on a cruise last week and of course there was a big "to do" about disinfecting hands at every meal and when they went in to play in the child care. They kept telling all the kids they needed to clean off the germs.
Prior to this trip I had taught my son why we wash our hands (he was not wanting to do it) and showed him online pictures of germs (really just cartoons to show kids) so that he would see the yucky bugs that we wash off by using soap.
Anyways, ever since our trip he has been OBSESSED with washing his hands. He washes his hands like 30 times (or more) a day--- whenever he even touches the outside of his nose, or one of his feet, or something I might have told him in the past was "dirty" (like, "don't put your mouth on that counter, it's dirty"...). When I tell him that his hands are fine and clean and he just washed them, he starts to cry about the germs. He gets really upset about the germs. I wish I had never shown him those pictures!
I am worried this is the beginning of an OCD problem. He has had other issues leaning toward obsession in the past--- like he cannot have anything sticky or dirty on his hands and if he even has a drop of food on his mouth it must be cleaned.
Anyone have any suggestions about the cleaning hands thing? should I just let it go until he gets over it and let him wash all he wants? I am having him put on lotion so his hands don't get too dry...
play in the dirt with him, take out flour and water and let him play, explain some germs are good and needed ..my daughter rarely washes her hands before dinner and is a healthy 5 year old. she does wash after going to the bathroom.
Each kid goes through this at some point.
A trick that has worked for us is to let him see you have 'good' messy hands. Playing in pot soil, playing in sand, playing in dirt. Practice the 'waiting to wash' until the activity is over instead of the instant he feels his hands are dirty.
Bake a cake, make sugar cookies. When/ if he handles eggs he'll need to wash his hands, and right before he starts to play with the dough, but otherwise, he shouldn't need to wash his hands until he's done with the cookies.
Make a graham cracker house. Kids get messy with that. That is OK!
Next chance you get, go outside, work up some mud, and make mud pies.
Play together and have fun.
Then wash up when done.
There's a time for being rolling in the mud dirty and there's a time for washing up.
I think the sooner you de-sensitize him to what he has recently learned, the better the outcome will be.
Continue to talk to him about why it was important to wash our hands, but he is taking it toooooo far now. Our bodies and soap and water do a fine job cleaning. And then make a new rule about when he can wash, or lock the bathroom door, or take him outside to park for the majority of the day where he literally can't wash his hands on a whim....and then just comfort him when he gets upset about not being able to wash up right away. As him mom, you'll know best what resonates with him....what will help him feel happy and secure if he doesn't get to wash.
You're going to have work long and hard to remind him that he is well, and not sick. The visualizations must have really scared him.
If you don't see improvement with your own efforts, then I would recommend you contact your Peds for advice.
Poor little guy :((
Mum4ever♫ said exactly what my cousin's pediatrician told her about her son in preschool (they said he acted neurotic and advised her to seek therapy) and it was hard, he would get hysterical when denied the opportunity to wash and they ultimately had to go into therapy.
Talk to you son's pediatrician now for advice and a plan to deal with this.
