My Son Is 3 1/2 Years Old and He Is Not Talking

My sister has two autistic children. One is high functioning and the other is not. Notice if you child walks on his toes a lot. This is one sign of autism. There are good programs out there for this. Does he like being touched? Keep us on this site informed as to what the doctor says. Many suggestions out there for any problem you have. A lot of support also.

You absolutely need to get him evaluated. To be over three years old and have only a few words is not developmentally normal. Contact the elementary school for which you are districted immediately and set something up as soon as possible.

YES! Why are you waiting until he's 3 1/2 before seeking help? Intervention should have started a year ago. His pediatrician should have pointed you towards therapy a long time ago. There is some negligence going on here.

Absolutely he needs to be checked. This should have happened over a year ago. Why hasn't your pediatrician brought this up? If he/she has not, then you definitely need to seek out a better provider for your child; this is negligence in my opinion. Your son qualifies for free preschool and speech therapy services because of his developmental issues. You should get on the phone TODAY and find a private speech therapist/pathologist to evaluate your son and start treatment until school starts and even then you might keep him in private therapy since he's getting started so late.

Hi M.,

I am a little late in responding to you, but I think you are right to start seeking some professional help. I am an Speech and Language Pathologist and worked in the public school setting for over ten years. My suggestion would be to begin with having his hearing tested and then visit a Speech and Language Pahtologist for additioanl evaluation and recommendations. I don't want to overwhelm you at all. If you have any questions or would like to discuss your concerns further, please contact me.

All the best,

A.

.

You can consult with a pediatrician about it to rule out hearing issues but my son was just shy of 3 when he said his first 2-word sentence. Prior to that it was only one word at a time and very few of those. Our pediatrician wasn't concerned and said he'd most likely start around 3 years old which he did.

It never hurts to check things out. If you feel he hears well and understands, then for your peace of mind, take him in. Boys generally are slower at forming sentences and speaking although they make lots of noises, LOL.

yes make an app. with your doc asap. im surprized they didnt ask about this at his 3 year well check. good luck!

Wow he's 3.5 and his dr. hasnt seemed concerned about this yet. I'd probably switch drs. Early intervention is key when it comes to speech delays. You need to make an appt with his dr. ASAP. Make sure you go armed with as much info as you can. Write down what words he can say or how many you think he uses so the dr can know how much of a delay he has. Has your son had a lot of ear infections in his life? That can often contribute to speech problems

Hi M.,

Yes you should get help. Contact Wake County Developmental Disabilities Services at ###-###-#### and explain your situation to them. Please contact them asap so that they can do the assessment to let you know where your child stands. If your child has a developmental delay, he/she can start school to get all the services need which starts at age 3 for school. It will be like pre-school (half days). Getting your child help as early as possible will help him/her in the further.

Good Luck

You can probably assess, yourself, whether this is more about 'ability' or 'desire', but a professional evaluation should be conducted.

The development of verbal skills is related to MANY things and is a very individual thing. Some factors are:
>How much one-on-one time is spent with him/her.
>How much s/he is talked TO and interacted with, verbally.
>Gender (boys are usually later than girls)
>Personality (some kids -- and adults [like me] are simply chatterboxes and some AREN'T [like my husband and one daughter]!)
>Patience and/or perfectionism (if the teacher is too particular, the child may feel 'scolded' and that there's no use to try because s/he'll never do it well enough). Be sure to encourage success and refrain from criticism.

>And, of course, there may be some actual (physical or mental) reason for a developmental delay.

Hi M.,

I am a speech-language pathologist and I definitely recommend you seek speech therapy for your son. Most children say their first word around a year old. There is a wide range of normal, but by 3 1/2, children typically are speaking in sentences. I'm not sure where you live, but there are many programs out there that can help you. Talk to your pediatrician and ask for a referral. Has your pediatrician voiced any concerns regarding your child's delay in speech? Please let me know if there's anything I can do to help. I can send you some strategies to begin using with him until you are able to start speech therapy. Just shoot me a response and I will send you some information.

Good luck!
-K.

For a free speech evaluation, you can contact your local school system. If you live in Memphis, it is the Division of Exceptional Children. If you live in Shelby County, you ask for Special Education division. Before the age of 3, you would have gotten the services through TEIS, which is state funded and free also.

I have a 26 yr old son, who was born 3 months premature, so I have experience with these related services. They are mandated by federal law to provide these services if the delay is significant enough. You can email at ____@____.com with any other questions.

P.

Is he showing any other signs, like not paying attention to people, or being so fascinated with maybe a toy that he doesn't notice anyone else and what they are doing? Does he seem sensitive to loud sounds or bright lights? You might ease any concerns you have by taking him to the doctor. He could recommend tests to check for different developmental issues. Most 3 year olds talk a good bit. Of course, hopefully things are perfectly fine and he just hasn't felt like saying too much yet. I'll pray for you and your son.

I would go ahead and try to start him in speech. If you call your local school system office, they should be able to get the help you need. With him being 3 1/2, you should be eligible for free services through your school system. They should be able to answer any questions you have about speech and they can help you decide if he truely needs speech.

I would talk to the pediatrician for sure. It may be nothing but you want to make sure. My kids talked pretty good by 2 1/2 but not all kids are the same.

Yes M.:
I worked with 3 and 4 year old children and so your son needs an early intervention. I would go ahead and try to start him in speech full evaluation with the school system to see if he needs speech therapy. If you call your local school system office, they should be able to get the help you need for free. With him being 3 1/2, you should be eligible for free services through your school system. They should be able to answer any questions you have about speech and they can help you decide if he truely needs speech since they will evaluate him.

Hello M.
I had a similar problem with my son. His Dr suggested a birth to 3 Ct state program (that is where I resided at the time). I am sure a similar program is in NC. I would ask your son's Dr for a referal to a State Program.Or call 411 info line. It was a very helpful program.. the speech therapist met with my son for 1 yr for 1 hour a week to practice words. I would not worry that it is an intelligence issue with your son. I was told it wasn't. The language section of the brain is seperate and not as developed yet- that is all. Now, my son, Matthew is 5 yrs old and speaking fine and has no problems.
Take Care and don't worry...
Sincerely
S.
Holly Springs, NC

Yes! Start with your pediatrician they can direct you to the appropiate testing. It could be a hearing loss that is contributing to speech delays. Is he around people who will just give him what he wants? If he is just given things then he won't develop the language skills.

Yes, you need to speak to your pediatrician and get referred. They need to refer your son for a speech and language evaluation. Since he is 3 years old, you might want to check with your school system. I found out a year too late that if I had taken my then 3 year old son to the school system for a speech/language evaluation, I would not had to private pay for speech therapy for a year because my insurance would not cover it (that was $40.00 a session total $1920.00 .) My pediatrian never said anything and the speech pathologist we went to never mentioned it (I don't know if they knew or not).

Our school system accepts kids at 3 years old. He would have been put in what is called an I.E.P. (Individualized Education Program) and the speech therapist would have come to our daycare for FREE. LIVE, LEARN AND INFORM OTHERS!!!
I might have had other services available to me that I lost out on due to my own ignorance.

I would also recommend a referral to a pediatric audiologist (for a hearing evaluation) and a pediatric ENT (Ears, Nose and Throat physician) to make sure nothing physical is getting in the way of his speech production. Your school system may have one, check with them. Many times, the audilogist is in the same office as the ENT so the appointments may be made the same day. I wouldn't have a hearing test and speech test on the same day, your child won't last (it took two sessions for our first speech test due to my child pooping out).

Get your doctor to refer, because many insurances will not pay without a referral from the doctor for these specialists. Also, make sure you have them send the results to your doctor and make sure you get a copy. If you go throught the school system, make sure they get all copies of any testing you have done.

Good luck.

I recommend you consult with a speech pathologist. I think it's important that you get help for him now. Kudos to you for being a mom that has it together enough to seek help for your child. I'm sure he's a smart little boy but many children need help with their speech and too many parents are afraid to get help. So, I applaud your efforts to help him develop. Good luck.

You should talk with his Pediatrician. They may recomend speech therapy which would help a lot. Good Luck.

As a pediatric OT, I would advise asking your pediatrician if you need a speech therapy eval. Also, are you making him "use your words" before you give him anything? Don't let him get away with just pointing and grunting. If after about one week he is getting more frustrated and you see behavioral changes (ie. increased tantrums), then he's probably having difficulty either hearing (or auditory processing) or having a hard time with speech in general. Can he follow veral directions? All these things your pediatrician can go through with you.

M.,
Have you discussed this with your child's pediatrician? I would definitely ask him, and then follow his guidance.

T.

Marya,

I have a son that is 5 now and at 3 years old he didnt talk very much just a few words. He was in the Birth the 3 program and was going to preschool and was recommended to have him tested for autism. He was in special needs preschool for 3 years and it was conformed he had autism with developement in speech delay, while he was in the birth to 3 they thought he had apraxia of speech.I would suggest having him test by a speech pathologist, and a neurologist.

Hi M.-

I am a mother of two boys (2 years-old and 8 1/2 months-old) and a teacher. At 3 1/2 years-old, children should be able to speak using three (or more) word phrases. Does he have issues with hearing? Is there a history of multiple ear-infections? Can he understand simple directions (Please come here? Please bring mommy your shoes?) I would suggest contacting your pediatrician AND the public school you are zoned for. Additionally, Tennessee has a free Early Intervention System (TEIS) set up for families with children (ages birth to three...you may still be able to qualify for their help). They are a resource that provides help for children with suspected delays or disorders. TEIS contact information can be found below. If they cannot help you I am pretty certain that they would be able to point you in the right directions.

TEIS Contact Information:
###-###-#### phone
###-###-#### fax

2175 Business Center Drive Suite 11
Memphis, TN 38134

Olga Page is the District Administrator
Barbara Hill is the Manager of Service Coordinators – direct line ###-###-####

I HOPE THIS IS HELPFUL!!!!

Yes talk to a doctor. My daughters 2 as of July 19th and she started talking up a storm in words we actually understood a month or two before her birthday. They always ask us a series of questions at every checkup and major visit to see how she is doing on speech, temper, safety, food safety, allergies, pets, walking, interacting with others/kids, running and ect. I am surprised your doctors hasn't or doesn't do this. At that age it does seem strange though. Maybe he is just an introvert, but get it checked anyway. God Bless.

Talk to your pediatrician. You may want to pursue speech therapy for your son. Sometimes there are physical issues that delay speech. Good luck!

I would definitely get him checked out by a professional. Also does he have hearing problems? My daughter had ear infections a lot as a baby and didn't talk very much or very clearly. We had tubes put into her ears and the next day she was saying words that I have never heard her say. And clear as a bell. Get that checked also. My little brother is Autistic. He exhibited the same type of things that you are describing. So I would quickly get him into a doctor. Have you voiced your concerns to you pediatrician? They have mild-stone chart with each well visit. They haven't been concerned up into this point? Seems like they should be catching this developmental delay. Good luck hope everything works out for you. T.

Hi M. my son was just like that on talking and speeching until I sent him at first to daycare pt then later about 6mos later ft. Being around others when u are the only child helps when they get in groups of their own age. Good luck on finding some type of daycare or envolement with other kids his age.

How are his motor skills? Does he sit and stare off blankly sometimes? The odds today are 1 in 150 are autistic. This is a sign... I have 2 great nephews. Beautiful boys and spirits, just dont comprehend speech. I will say a prayer for you, and pray that some speech therapy will be the only need. God Bless.

Hi M., I can understand how you feel. Have you talked to your child's doctor? That is where you can start. M.

Have you ever had his hearing checked? This is something you should definately talk to his pediatrician about. It could just be he's enjoying you talking...my niece did that until she stayed with me one weekend and I made her use words for things...like when she wanted a drink, I would tell her to say, drink...at home she could just point and say ugh...mom would grab it. Also, noticed your degree...would love to talk to you about it, drop me a line if you can. Hope this helps and best of luck!