A., I don't know that I have any advice for you, but I do have a cautionary tale. I'm from England, and teen pregnancy is at least as much of a problem there as here. My mum never spoke to my sister or myself about sex. We thought she was embarrassed or something, and figured we would find out about it all ourselves. My sister ended up pregnant at 16. She dropped out of school, and had a baby boy. At first she thought it was wonderful. She got alot of attention, and everyone loved the baby. Then the father left the picture and she was alone. My mum tried to help out, but it was hard. My sister couldn't get a decent job because of her lack of education. They lived in poverty, and were miserable. When her son was 5 my sister became ill. She would faint, feel like she could throw up etc, but had no idea why. She became scared to visit the doctor, so didn't bother. Finally things became too much and she moved back in with my mum, who made her go to the hospital. Valentines Day 1995 my sister was diagnosed with cervical cancer caused through HPV she caught from a "boyfriend". February 28th they told her it was terminal. They gave her 2 years. We were all devastated, and honestly didn't really bebieve that it could be true. On March 29th 1996, she died.She was 24. In the end she had just over a year with us. Her son was 7 years old with no parents. He is 19 now, and still feels anger, hurt, and frustration at what happened.
I myself became pregnant at age 20 by a man that was abusive at best. I thought I was being careful, but obviously not careful enough. When I was 4 months along, this man beat me and threw me down the stairs. I lost the baby. It was a terrible experience, but it turned things around for me. I took a good look at the choices I had made, and the ones I still had ahead of me, and decided to make some changes. I now have 3 children, and have been married for almost 18 years.
I later found out why my mum couldn't talk about sex. She had been abused as a child by her father, and then as a teenager slept with anyone that showed her any affection at all. She had a baby boy, that she had adopted. Somewhere I have a half brother, and although I would love to meet him, he'll never be able to know my sister, and all of it through sex.
I guess what I want to pass along to you is that the most important thing is to talk. There are probably right and wrong ways to do it, but just doing it is the main thing. I wish you luck, and my prayers are with you and your daughter.