I have also had similar "friends" in my life who were what I call "flaky". I learned this about them a very long time ago as they are the people who really only come around when there is something in it for them and the ones you can't really count on to be there, even when they say they will be. The best way I have found to deal with it is not to completely exclude them from my life but to expect nothing from them, knowing how they are. Your true friends will be there when they promise without excuses and will invite and include you without you having to initiate. I have also found that some "friends" want more to do with me when they aren't spending every free moment chasing after a man in their lives. I include these fair-weather friends when I send out invitations to events, knowing and expecting that they won't show even if they say they will and planning on that accordingly. 99.9% of the time, I am right, but every blue moon, they might surprise you, so I still include an invitation. I keep them on my Christmas card list, and I send out e-mails now and then to stay in touch from my end. These are the friends who will send you hundreds of stupid e-mail forwards but won't take 5 minutes to type a personal e-mail to you updating you on their lives. These friends are the ones who expect you to come to their wedding and baby showers bearing gifts but won't reciprocate and come to any of the same for you. These are the ones who want people to come to their kids' birthday parties with gifts but again, they don't show for your own. I am giving a baby shower for my real best friend this weekend, and we have had this situation with some mutual fair-weather friends over the years. I invited all of these friends to her shower that I'm giving, especially since my best friend went to their events bearing gifts every time, and this is the first baby for my best friend. So, it is time for all of these friends to reciprocate their attendance and a gift for her baby! Well, so far, none of the fair-weather friends are coming. They all have excuses that are lame, or they just haven't even responded. We totally expected this, and once this happens enough times, you learn several things: A--don't expect these people to ever show when they promise, B--don't make plans with just these people and be disappointed as it's better to invite them only to group events where you aren't left in the lurch if they don't show, C--don't ever EVER "go in on" something with them as you WILL be left paying for the whole thing (or their share) or left with the responsibility of it all (like sending funeral flowers, giving a shower, purchasing a group gift for someone), and D--make sure this person has your current contact information so that isn't an excuse for them to not get in touch with you, but don't find yourself putting more effort into sustaining a friendship with the person that they show to you. There is someone out there somewhere who would value your friendship enough to be there for you, to reciprocate, and to show when they say they will. Some people are just the flaky type, and you have to realize what a waste of your time it is to try too hard with these people. You have better things to do, so put your time toward those things, such as making new friends or doing things with the people you can count on, such as your family. That is what I learned a long time ago with people I've known as long as 25 years. I hope this helps, and also, don't take it personally in thinking that their behavior has anything to do with you as a person. I would guarantee it does not. It is just how that person is, and now that you know it, move on to better things and keep that person on the fringes unless she puts forth more effort.