My 4 Week Old Won't Sleep!

Updated on July 20, 2012
H.1. asks from Des Moines, IA
9 answers

Ladies, I need help!

My 4 week old will not settle down for sleep easily at all. It always take a few hours at minimum of soothing to get her to be able to sleep. It really seems like literally she is spending 100% of her time in about a half awake- half asleep state - she's super tired and will have her eyes closed or trying to, but will never be fully settled...constantly popping eyes open, crying, fidgeting, fussing. She will doze on and off anywhere from 5-45 minutes at a time but never seems settled.

I know she's new to this world and being difficult to settle is a newborn characteristic but I just don't know what to do. I even envy other moms of newborns who say their child won't sleep without being held, a certain swing, car rides etc - because none of these things even works for us.

She's formula fed and a spitter. We follow all basic rules for spitty babies including keeping her upright, frequent burprings, gas drops, etc. My son was also a spitter and had reflux so we are accustomed to seeing and dealing with that issue.

She seems to me drastically overtired because sometimes if you pop pacified back in or sway her or whatever she will instantly close eyes and quiet. But justa few moments later she will require your intervention again. I use "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" with my first and was very successful. I know sleep principles such as not letting baby get overtired, etc. But it's very hard after hours of attempting to help her sleep because by that time it's time for another feed, another diaper change, etc. Baby wearing isn't any more successful. Swaddling helps but still not enough.

Its super tiring and I really don't know what to do. I can go NOWHERE without her screaming her head off (car rides and errands are impossible!) I have a two year old and staying inside trying to rock, shush, etc her isn't possible. I really don't know what to do....any thoughts?

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B.R.

answers from Madison on

Have you taken her to a chiropractor yet? a good pediatric one. If you haven't then do so...I can only say from experience that some kids need a good adjustment after birth.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

She is only 4 wks. Give her time!

1 mom found this helpful
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D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I don't know what you've tried but...

My reflux baby loved to sleep in the moby wrap on my chest. He kept him positioned vertically (good for the reflux), but made him feel very safe and cuddled, much like a swaddle would, and his ear was right over my heart which they say is comforting to a newborn because they are familiar with the sound of your heartbeat. I would put him in and walk the neighborhood (or mall or laps around the playground while my other child played, etc). If you haven't tried a moby wrap/sleepy wrap/something similar, you should.

Here is what it looks like: http://www.mobywrap.com/instructionpages.aspx?Topic=instr...

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K.C.

answers from New London on

My daughter did the same thing. It was reflux...and then, sensory issues.
My daughter shut her eyes at 3:30 am and woke up at 7:30 am every day ! That was about it ! I never slept...for a very, very long time. Sounds like you need to see more than the pediatrician if the baby doesn't settle down in a few wks!

My second child slept !

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I second the suggestion to try a pediatric chiropractor. If she's been like this since day 1, she would be out of alignment causing the discomfort and inability to sleep

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Sounds like pain.

I'd guess ear infection over reflux (no idea why, just a gut thing, they're equally likely... I take it back, it's because youre already doing most things that reflux babies need), but they ARE equally likely with the symptoms you're describing.

Try giving infant Tylenol and see if she conks out. If so, then it's pain related.

Here's something else to try: swaddling. As in... If she is, stop, and if she isn't, start.

I'm suggesting that because my son would NOT sleep while swaddled or confined. Swaddling was EASY with him, because he was 'overly developed', so he'd scream until he got his arms and legs free. He HATED swaddling (nurses gave up in the hospital, because he wouldn't sleep for more than 5 minutes... BUT he was developed enough muscle wise to squirm and yank himself free. Step 2 was putting him in his crib. I'd planned on cosleeping, bassinets, etc. he didn't sleep well (as you describe, but I chalked that up to 'newborn'. But we HAD a crib. I HAD to set him down one day about 1 mo old, and happened to be walking by the crib in 'his' room. Just for a moment I set him down, and when I came back after the emergency pee... There he was: arms and legs straight out (starfish style), snoring. He slept for 3 hours.

((Insert singing angels, hallelujah chorus, orgasmic delight.))

I didn't connect the two. (I was TIRED) but that night, in his bassinet I SAW him try to 'starfish', bump his hands and legs in the side, and yank them back and start crying. Try it again, ditto. So I picked him up, walked to his room, set him in his crib... And Voila!! He stretched out his arms and legs, and promptly fell asleep. For 6 hours. Ate. Passed out for another 3 hours. Ate. Slept AGAIN.

So while no sleep can be a BIG thing (colic, reflux, ear infection, etc.) it can ALSO be a little, quirky thing.

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L.P.

answers from Dallas on

Don't really have any advice. I had a little boy the same way. The first time he slept for 3 hours was when he got his 1 month old shots. I was relieved. Sounds awful, I know. He is 4 now and we just got him in his own bed this month and he still doesn't sleep the entire night. He does go right back down though.

Just wanted to say to hang in there. Get someone to help you because you need a break! If you go to church, ask someone to come over and rock, walk the baby, etc.

It sounds like this little girl my have reflux like your last baby. You are doing it all right. Don't give up and take care of yourself too.

It helped my guy to lay on his tummy. I know it's not what they tell you now; however, it makes some babes comfortable.

Good luck momma! Wish I had more for you.

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L.S.

answers from Little Rock on

Try classical music. My babies loved it and it can trigger them to go to sleep. Try putting her car seat on top of the dryer and turning it on. The vibration used to help my daughter go to sleep. How is the lighting in the room when she tries to sleep? Is she getting enough milk? Sometimes babies don't sleep well when they are hungry. Hope these help!

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A.P.

answers from Janesville-Beloit on

This sounds like a really uncomfortable baby to me. I'm assuming you've talked to your doctor, but maybe follow up again with exactly what you said in this post?
I know you mentioned baby wearing-have you tried out different carriers? I had the moby, the bjorn and finally got the Beco Butterfly, and that was my favorite. Easy to wear, comfortable, has a newborn insert. Maybe if you keep trying the baby wearing that will save your sanity, because at least you can still be playing with your 2-year-old?
Also (and I am certainly no expert! :)), but maybe if you focus less on "trying" to get baby to go to sleep....I think 4 weeks is really young to be attempting any kind of schedule. If somehow you could adopt the attitude of "baby will sleep when she sleeps, when she's tired," rather than trying so hard, it could take some pressure off you (and baby)? Just throwing things out there....

Good luck! Your post makes me nervous because I'm expecting my 2nd this fall and will have a newborn and a toddler and have been counting on a good sleeper :). I hope you get some rest soon!

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