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My 3 Year Old Is Still Obsessed with My Breasts After Nursing Has Stopped

I stopped nursing my son when he was 20 mos. Now he is 40 mos, and still obsessed with my breasts! Sometimes I feel that they are like a security blanket because he likes to put his hand in my shirt when he is upset. But, he also likes to do it at other times like when I am sitting next to him or when I'm holding him. He also likes to pull up my shirt and look and them, touch them and on occasion, lay his head on one and say "i love you boobie"! I know it sounds funny and somewhat inappropriate but is this normal? I don't so much have a problem with it, but others do and it is quite embarrassing if he does it in public. Just wondering if anyone else has gone through this. Thanks!

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Huh. Well, my husband is 40 years old--he's still obsessed with my breasts, too. He would totally pull up my shirt and say, "I love you, boobie" if he thought for one minute that he could get away with it. Total Y-chromosome behavior.

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Okay! (Jennifer w) I HAVE HAD SUCH A GREAT LAUGH FOR TODAY!! THanks so much!!! You are so correct. Men never stop...

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Huh. Well, my husband is 40 years old--he's still obsessed with my breasts, too. He would totally pull up my shirt and say, "I love you, boobie" if he thought for one minute that he could get away with it. Total Y-chromosome behavior.

4 moms found this helpful

Okay! (Jennifer w) I HAVE HAD SUCH A GREAT LAUGH FOR TODAY!! THanks so much!!! You are so correct. Men never stop...

1 mom found this helpful

My son will be 3 in May and I only nursed him for about 6 mos. He started rubbing on my breasts when he was about 2 yrs old and got rid of his pacifiers. Yes, more than one. He would carry around 3 or 4 at the same time. He uses my breasts as a pacifier, mostly when he goes 2 sleep (we have a family bed). He also does it when he is really upset and when he is sick.He has tried and learned that we don't do it anywhere else but home. At first I thought something wrong of it and of course my husband didn't like it, but then I think about how some women still breatfeed their children to age 5. I don't feel it is inappropriate in the privacy of your own home, it is nurturing. I chose to enjoy my bonding with him knowing that it is a phase he will soon outgrow.

Just like sucking thumb or the binky, I bet the breast is a form of security and comfort for your son. If you want him to stop, you may want to sit him down and explain that you don't want him to do that anymore and whenever he does, just gently remind him. It might take a while to break the habit.

My son has a bad habit of playing with his belly button and to ween him off we started telling him not to do it in public. Now we are at the point of not letting him play with his belly button at all. We are still working on it and constantly have to remind him.

Good luck

My son stopped nursing at 9 months but he would also put his hand down my shirt for a long time after he stopped. When he couldn't do that he would put his hand down his own shirt. The problem was it would also do it to grandma and aunts. I think that your son is a little old to be doing this behavior still though. Of course it is also my opinion that 20 months is way to old to be nursing. Not to offend, but you did ask if it was "normal." So, anyway, I would just remove my sons hand and not make a big deal out of it and eventually he stopped. If he is doing this a year and 8 months after stopping breast feeding it sounds like you need to do more to discourage it. Remind him to respect your personal space.

I nursed my 3 yr. old son till he was just over a year when I became pregnant with his baby sister. He has seen me nurse her and we have had lots of conversations about "mommy milk". He too was obsessed with my breast. I have curved his obsession by letting him know that this is my body and that mommies have breasts for feeding babies and that now that he is a big boy he gets hugs and kisses and other praise for comfort and a job well done. It really helped to stay on top of acknolleging when he was being a big boy. I hope this helps.

I have a similiar situation. I nursed my son until he was 16 months old, he is now 41 months old. He is obsessed with my belly, I also think it is a security blanket for him. He usually only asks for "belly" when he is tried, but when he does it other times or in public I remind him that he only gets belly when it is bed time. Even though when he is sitting next to me watching TV I let it slide sometimes. It doesn't bother me, but it does my husband at times. I am not sure when this behavior will subside, but I just wanted you to know that you are not alone!

I am still nursing my 28 month old but only morning nap if she takes one and always bedtime.. then again only if she is ill will she get it on demand... i ran into a problem where i discovered just how much she depends on this as a security issue, whenever her older sister would leave after visiting she would come to my lap or hang on me(you know the way)because she really missed her and would cry too and couldnt really express herself and if i ignored her request to nurse she would just go and find way to masterbate...(her ped dr said its fine ... and some friend said once to me well at least she isn't going to hit someone or a pet or biting etc for stress relief) i discovered that my child is using nursing to console herself, she is verbally behind by about 1 year and while she adores my still chubby belly and will rub it for comfort she hasnt tried too much of the focus on my breast and I DO plan to wean her by 2 and half as is customary for our religion and culture... I think its not really a boy or girl issue its the only real true comfort souce of contentment to them in their entire lives however age they are now... we live in a society that is so apparent to strangers or friends rather than close family and while this creates situations where embarassment can creep in... most other nursing moms totally can relate to what you are going through and those that havent yet endure or accomplished nursing an older toddler seem to pass judgement when its quite natural in most parts of the world to nurse a child into their 3's. oh and i think its quite normal and even if its not who cares, he will grow up secure and loved,and thats what really counts

I have the same problem with my son as well howevr he will be 3 in July. I know exactly how you feel. He usually does it when we are at church talking with people before it starts. Thank you for asking this question. I feel the same way you do about this .

Not sure what is normal or not but my son was also breastfed, he nursed from birth to 16mths, he would put his hand down my shirt but past the bra and just leave his hand there and rest his head on my shoulder. He also squeezes them and says mommys boobies. I say yes they are mommys boobies and dont touch. He points to them and says mommy boobies. He would also lift my shirt and rest his head on my tummy while holding my boobs. I think its a phase and will pass eventually. Just keep telling him not to touch and that they are yours. He will eventually stop.

My girls are still nursing, but the older one nurses very infrequently and is still obsessed with my breasts (and tummy). I feel like if I let it go on it's not as big of a deal, but I tell her if it makes me uncomfortable (because we're in public or I just don't like it). Usually I let her do it and then gently get her hands out of my shirt pretty quickly and sometimes with a joke. I think it's pretty typical and totally normal. My kids love my body and they love their own bodies.


I think that at this point you probably could teach him what is appropriate and what isn't. If it doesn't bother you then let him know that it's okay at home but not in public places and make sure that you stick with it or it won't work. Good luck.

My youngest daughter was obsessed with boobs when she was about 2/12 - 3 years old. She's 4 now and will have an ocassional spurt. But she grew out of it. She was always pulling my shirt down or up to look. And even worse, she had an intrest in anyones and would ask people about their boobs. That was always fun!

I usually just told Natalee that we didn't look at boobs when other people were around and that we shouldn't ask people about their boobs. But I didn't make a big deal about it. She grew out of it.

Have you tried giving him a blanket or stuffed animal to hold?

Good luck!

Hi P., I can understand your frustration with that. Of course to him, that is what he knows makes him feel comfortable. I think it's all normal, but since he's getting to that age, maybe you could tell him that he's a big boy now and he doesn't need "mommy's boobie" anymore. Give him a special blanket or toy to use as his new security blanket. It may take a little time, but I think he will get the hang of it. Just keep in mind he doesn't know any better. Good luck!!

I was told at a conference once, that the scent of vanilla is as close to "mother's milk" as researchers have found. Maybe find a toy or something that has a vanilla scent on it that he can take with him.

Welcome to my world! How funny! My four year still puts his hand down my shirt (or at least tries). It drives me nuts! This has actually become a joke with my family and friends. It's totally like a security blanket b/c he does this unconsciously and everywhere we go; when I pick him up, help him in/out of his car seat, sleeping, standing, sitting, really any chance he gets! I remove his hand and ask to to please stop b/c I don't like "that." He calls them beauty marks (I know...kids??); "Mom, I love your beauty marks." It's sounds really funny until he says this in front of some stranger! It's especially rough when he's tired. I am sure he, and your child, will grow out of this as my son is more aware. When I ask him to stop he pulls his hand out and says, "Oooops sorry." I certainly don't want to be dropping him off at kindergarten only to have him wave goodbye and put his hand down my shirt! I know this is completely harmless, it's more annoying for me than anything. Just know that you are not alone.

Very normal. You comforted him through all of his 'needs' with nursing. As he grows he won't 'need' his comfort to come from your breasts, but he will need reasurance from you. Gently pull his hands away from the area and maybe try holding and caressing his little hand. He will learn...don't fret. If you have to get stern sometimes, that's ok too.

Well my son is still kinda young yet to talk but he just turned a year old, i still nurse a little bit trying to wean to only nighttime and then soon not at all,i did notice him trying to lift up my shirt the other day at daycare he said neh which in Dunstan that means hungry.I learned this from a cd kinda cool.Anyways i would just say no and tell him your serious.I hope this helps i just think consistency is best,take a toy away if he keeps it up.

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