My daughter had the same problem when she was 3 1/2yrs old. Her pediatrician prescribed the same cream for her and I have to put it on her by using a q-tip, 2x a day. However, her case was quite similar to yours, although hers was probably 3/4 partially closed.
I felt so helpless whenever she screamed and cried. But I kept on assuring her that she need to relax and just let me help her. It was indeed a nightmare, but since it was a daily routine, she got used to it. At times, I used a little force to "open" it. She'll complain that it hurts, and sometimes it'll bleed a little. It hurts her everytime she goes for #1, but after a few times, she was fine. Gradually, I tone it down from 1x a day to every other day.
But remember, you just need to put a tiny bit on it - not a whole lot. Once it's open up, stop immediately. One thing that these doctors "forgot" to tell us parents is that the side effect of putting this cream too much on our skin, especially on infants and/or toddlers; could cause skin cancer down the road!
Today, things are back to normal. She is now 4yrs old, and nowadays, I would just check on her 2-3 times a week. I often get my daughter to drink plenty of water(we cook our own water), not only that it's good for her, but also to help "naturally" heal it by itself. You have to always remind your daughter to go use the bathroom and not hold it - cos it'll then lead to infection to her kidney.
Like many other things in life, surgery often sounded like the only solution to cure/heal the problem. In this case, you cannot give up so easily. Convince/talk constantly with your daughter about the fact that she needs to trust you in order to help ease the pain. Pace yourself, work together and she'll be alright soon.
Contact me directly if you need further clarification, etc.
- R. D.
Hubby and I works fulltime in the IT industry. Prefers natural remedy then OTC/doctors prescription. One and only daughter, who is in pre-school full time.